I heard a story in my childhood from an old man who was called insane. He always came to our orphanage and told us a story.
The story was about a righteous man, a man who did everything right, a man who followed God's will, a man who was self-sacrificing and patient. He was kind and helped everyone, but he was only treated as a tool, a tool for people to grow ahead of him.
His friends and even his lover used him and walked ahead with someone else. He thought it was a test from the heavens. He continued suffering silently and slowly lost all connections, because people never saw him as a human but as stairs to their own success.
He slowly lost his belief in heaven. He stopped praising God for meaning, but because God was the only thing he had left. He never cursed heaven, he stayed silent even though he suffered more and more.
In the end, when he died, he thought he would reach heaven and get a sweet fruit for his kindness. But even heaven rejected him. When I asked him why, he replied,
"They said he never lived like a person, he never lived a meaningful life. His life was never a life. His life is an embodiment of injustice, exploitation, and meaninglessness."
He said I should think of an answer for myself to this story, the story of a righteous man. And what I thought was this.
The universe is indifferent. It's not cruel, but uncaring. Your kindness, evilness, sadness, happiness, and loneliness, none of them gets rewarded. It is all in our head, and that's why, for me, morality is an illusion.
Even now I am in a situation, surrounded by hundreds of Dreamers. All of them are here to kill me. If I get in their range of attack, I will be slaughtered like a pig.
If I thought through the lens of others, I would tremble even at the thought of killing one, let alone a hundred of them. But I am not going to use any lenses because I am here, about to get killed for a reason I don't know.
And if there is no fault of mine in it, and that's the case, I will even fight a million to save only myself.
[Exp: 450/500]
[You are close to achieve Perfect Influence!]
My right eye glowed bright white as I charged at Taylor Markson. I lifted my claw and it hit his sword, which he was using to protect himself.
From behind me, another Dreamer came with a sword and aimed at my heart, but my scarf folded itself, made a fist, and hit the Dreamer with it.
I increased the force in my claw and threw Taylor Markson far away. Seeing that, the other Dreamers looked a bit scared because most of them didn't have an influence. The only one who had an influence was—
Clang!
A bullet was about to hit me, which I blocked with my claw. Surprisingly, my claw made a sound like metal getting hit. It made itself hard enough to deflect a bullet.
"What are you doing, Elisabeth?" I asked her. She was holding a revolver.
"How dare you call the Queen without any honorific!" A man behind her yelled at me while pointing his rifle at me.
But Elisabeth signaled the man to be quiet and said with a sad look on her face, "I'm sorry, but I'm one of the Dreamers who got the task of killing you. I don't understand why you are an Error, but I need the rewards. Even if I'm the queen of a single country of an Earth among many, I still want to save it as a queen."
She pointed her revolver at me again. I looked at her for a moment with my white and normal eyes, then at my hand.
"I understand your reasoning, but I'm not here to die."
I turned my gaze to her again and asked, "You said you are a queen, then you must have great experience in life. Then tell me... what does it mean to be human? What am I lacking in that process? Why am I not like you all? All happy or sad."
Everyone around me went silent. Why did they? Don't they know the answer to such questions even though they lived their whole life as normal humans?
"Answer me, Elisabeth." My voice started growing more hard and monstrous. It felt like my influence was causing my mind to go blank.
***
I was feeling his emotions coming out of his body, and those emotions were empty. There were no emotions there that I could identify, it was just silent cold in emotions' clothes.
I didn't know the answer to such questions. But why didn't I? Haven't I spent my life as a normal human?
Yes, he is right. I'm a queen, shouldn't I know that? But... just because I'm queen, does that make me omniscient?
It was the first time I lowered my head. I didn't look at his eyes while answering. "I don't know. It's true that I am a queen, but that doesn't make me all-knowing."
"..."
I sighed and lifted my head up, gazed straight into his eyes, and said, "What does it mean to be human? That question doesn't have a definite answer. And in the current moment, it doesn't even matter."
Bang!
I shot at Rayen, which he again deflected with his claw.
***
I deflected the bullet and charged at Elisabeth, but suddenly from behind her, her men started firing bullets at me nonstop.
Bang! Bang! Bang!
Those bullets that hit my half body, which was covered in void, got digested inside, but those that hit my left side that was uncovered punctured my skin, and blood started running out of my body.
My vision started going dizzy as I tried to dodge. I dropped down and covered my body, but some bullets still hit me.
Smack!
A huge slab hit the men who were firing at me. It was thrown by Sia, who looked visibly angry at them.
"Stop that! He is my team member!" she yelled at the men.
(But when did I agree to that?)
"Argh." I groaned in pain. Blood continued pouring out of my body. If it continued, I was going to die.
She ran toward me and tried to lift me up, but when she touched me, the void started engulfing her. I forcefully threw her away.
"If you came any clos—" I coughed blood, but I wiped the blood off my mouth and looked straight into Sia's eyes.
"If you came closer then the void will eat you alive. I will handle it, if I need to, then I will kill them." Slowly my body started repairing itself. It was a surprise to me as it hadn't happened before.
[Conditions for a New Influence Skill are met!]
[Influence Skill, 'Void Healer' is activated!]
The blood that had already poured out from my body turned into void and attached back to my body. All the punctures in my skin got repaired and turned into void.
All the men behind Elisabeth were shocked, even Elisabeth herself was shocked.
(He healed all those injuries? How?)
That must be what she was thinking.
[Ding! Ding!]
[To prevent harming anyone who isn't related to this quest, you all are covered with a barrier. The people who aren't related to this quest are enjoying the Dreamers Summit peacefully outside!]
A window appeared in front of us, and the barrier came into notice. It was a bit transparent but strong enough that no one could go outside or come inside it.
"You bastard!"
My focus turned to Taylor Markson, who lunged at me with his sword. His body was covered with bruises, but he still had the power to attack me.
I tried to defend against the sword, but this time it wasn't easy. Taylor's heavy body was pushing me down.
"Motherfucker, you thought you could defeat me, huh? I will cut you in pieces!" With a roar, Taylor kicked my left side and tossed me off.
(Hah, that void didn't touch me. That means I can kill him this way!)
He was about to slash me with his sword, but multiple other Dreamers pushed him off because they wanted the reward. Even though they didn't have an influence, after seeing Taylor, they got courage.
I stood up and watched them fight each other. I knew everyone would be mad for the rewards. I took the chance and walked away from them, my new skill healed my wounds.
[Your Influence is imperfect, your full power is being restricted by The Order!]
Trangg!
I felt a string of Presence coming from someone. There was a woman who had activated her own influence.
In her influence, she had a golden crown on her head and armor clad on her body. In her hand was a spear, it was around six feet long. She looked like an archangel who was summoned to slay the demons.
She charged at me.