Chapter 76 — Promises Must Be Kept
"Miss Bones — would you stay behind for a moment, please?"
I called to Susan after the lesson ended. She looked at me with mild surprise but did not argue — simply gathered her things and waited while the rest of the students filed out.
"Professor?"
"Here."
I held out a small booklet.
"Oh?"
She took it with a puzzled expression, turning it over to look at the plain cover, which gave absolutely nothing away about what was inside.
"It is a study guide. When your aunt and I visited the Ministry so that I could attend the hearing in the Lockhart case, we spoke briefly — and I made a promise to try to help you discover a particular talent."
"My talent?"
The girl looked at me with genuine bewilderment.
"I think you must be mistaken, Professor."
She shook her head, and there was a faint edge of hurt in it alongside the disappointment.
"I have no talent for Charms and Enchantments. When we spoke last year, you confirmed as much yourself — and Professor Flitwick said the same, that his subject is not where my gift lies."
"And?"
I looked at her with mild surprise.
"Er..."
The question clearly threw her completely.
"Well. Without talent, mastery is almost an impossible dream."
"Nonsense."
I shook my head.
"Neither Professor Flitwick nor I could ever have said that to you. What I said was that mastery would be harder without a natural gift — harder than for those who possess one. I did not say it was an impossible dream. After all, my own gift does not lie in Charms and Enchantments either, and I am already an Apprentice."
The girl's eyes went wide with shock.
"In any case, I think the fault lies partly with us. Flitwick tends to say things as they are, in order not to raise false hopes, and I am used to speaking mainly with adults — so neither of us thought for a moment you might take our words that way."
"I..."
She did not know what to say, and simply opened and closed her mouth, occasionally managing a small "I."
"Regardless, having no talent for Charms and Enchantments does not mean you have no talent at all. And you know — I might have stayed quiet about this."
I studied her carefully.
"But you surprised me. Even after learning you had no gift for my subject, you kept working, and right now you are at a level most of your year-mates can only dream of. Why?"
She dropped her eyes to the floor. I allowed myself a faint smile, because the answer was written plainly enough in her posture: anger, most likely. The desire to prove Flitwick and me wrong.
"I just wanted to show."
She was speaking very quietly, and I caught only those few words — but they were enough. Almost.
"Speak up."
"I wanted to prove that I could succeed even without talent."
"Prove it to whom?"
"To you. To you and Professor Flitwick."
I gave a slightly disappointed shake of my head.
"The desire to prove something to others is all very well — but remember this."
She looked up.
"It helps to have someone to look up to, someone to model yourself on. But what helps even more is having not just a vague goal, but a specific person to surpass. And in your case, that person should be you."
"Myself?"
"Yes."
I nodded.
"Did you learn a first-year spell in three days? Then the next spell of the same difficulty, you learn in two and a half. Did you cast Lumos one hundred times? Next time, you do it at least one hundred and ten. I am being crude, of course, but the point is — you are always the opponent standing directly in front of you. And the best thing about competing with yourself is that you cannot lie to anyone."
I looked at her steadily.
"I was a little."
"Do not worry about it. Just read through the guide. From what I can see — and sense — from you, I expect these exercises will come surprisingly naturally."
"I still do not quite understand."
"It is a guide to basic exercises in medical Charms."
"Medical?"
"Yes."
I kept my eyes on the girl.
"My mother is a Healer. I copied this guide from our home library with her permission. I think you may find yourself making progress considerably faster than you would expect."
"That is. Thank you?"
She clutched the booklet as though it might vanish.
"Bear in mind — I will be checking what you have managed to learn at the end of the year. That assessment will determine whether I continue to help you, or whether I simply leave you with the knowledge that you have a gift for Healing and the understanding that you will need to seek further information on your own."
Susan looked at me with eyes that had gone quite wide.
"A gift? Me?"
The look on her face told me she would do absolutely anything to avoid letting me down. Though I already knew she was not the sort to sit idly on her potential. She was determined, this girl, and she would not let an opportunity like this slip by. In any case — once I had made the promise to help Susan, I had already sent word to our mothers to arrange some form of lodging for her and her aunt.
"Yes. And why are you so surprised? Almost everyone has some talent. Most people simply never meet anyone who has encountered that particular talent before and can point them in the right direction. For my part, I would have no way of identifying talent in, say, Necromancy, or music, or physics — any number of things."
I shook my head.
"You were lucky. My mother is a Healer, and I grew up feeling her magical energy — which is slightly different from the energy of other people. And when I sensed something similar from you, I recognised it."
"But why did you not say anything last year?"
"To what end?"
I looked at her quizzically.
"Last year you were not ready for even the most basic instruction in this — you likely would not have taken anything useful from it by the end of the year. And giving something to someone who has not yet shown the determination to use it..."
"But I am just the same as everyone else."
"You are. But you have determination — determination that genuinely deserves some recognition."
I nodded.
"And now it depends entirely on you whether that help continues."
"I will not let you down!"
"Quietly."
I came around the desk and placed a hand on Susan's shoulder.
"There is no need for that. Simply be yourself and work as hard as you have been — and if things go well, I will write you a recommendation for St Mungo's. They will not let you near any patients, naturally, but once or twice a week you will be able to attend classes there for the nursing and care staff, and they will teach you new spells while you practise the ones you have learned this year."
"Yes."
She nodded quickly.
"Thank you! I will not let you down!"
"I know."
I smiled at her.
"You may go. Susan—"
I called after her as she was nearly out the door.
"…if I find out you have been pushing yourself to the point of exhaustion, I will personally see to it that your wand is only handed to you during lessons."
She stopped and looked back at me with alarm.
"Because preserving your magic is far more important than expanding your abilities. I trust we understand one another, and you will not be too harsh on yourself."
"Yes. I will not let you down."
She left. I heard the little cluster of girls who had been waiting outside fall into step with her.
"Mr Black."
Helena drifted out of the wall and I looked at her with a resigned sigh.
"I am listening, Helena."
Yes, my emotions were screaming at me to ignore her. Yes, that would have been consistent with my biological age. But my mind was older than that, and I understood well enough when it was and was not appropriate to act on childish impulses. I knew perfectly well that walking out and spending the evening ignoring her had been rather juvenile. I simply had not been able to stop myself in the moment.
"First — I want to ask your forgiveness. I am deeply ashamed that I concealed what I knew about the diadem. I was afraid that if you found out it was gone, you would not help me — and speaking to my mother again meant everything to me."
I closed my eyes and said nothing. Childish? Perhaps. But it had genuinely hurt.
I did not keep my eyes closed for long. I opened them, looked at Helena, and let the look say what words did not — that I was listening.
"I am truly sorry."
"Is that all?"
I raised an eyebrow at the ghost hovering before me.
"No. My mother also asked me to pass on a request — she would like to meet with you and speak."
I sighed and glanced at the clock.
"I have some free time after lunch. I can come to the Room of Requirement and speak with Miss Ravenclaw."
"I could ask no more."
She bowed once more and slipped swiftly into the wall. I calmly gathered my things, locked my study, and headed for the Great Hall. The students treated me exactly as they always had — but the Heads of house were looking at me with entirely new eyes.
Understandable, really. It is not every day a second-year successfully animates a Founder's portrait. For now I chose to let that attention sit unacknowledged, though it was undeniably flattering.
"Draco — what exactly is going on?"
"Hm?"
I looked at Penny, who had asked this.
"The staff keep looking at you strangely."
"That is their prerogative. My attention at this particular moment is on my food, on you, and on my friends."
"So I am not even first?!"
Penny put on an expression of wounded dignity.
"Penny, a hungry man can only put a girl first if she is the one cooking. And even then, the moment the plate appears, she drops to second."
"Pff."
She snorted, but from what I could tell she was not actually offended — which was good, because offending her was the last thing I wanted. She was sensible enough not to push it, and lunch passed in a pleasantly comfortable atmosphere.
After lunch I saw the others to the common room and made my way to the Room of Requirement — but when I reached the spot where it ought to have appeared, the door simply did not come.
I tried again.
Then a third time. Still nothing.
"Well."
I shrugged and was about to leave when Helena emerged from the wall.
"I beg your pardon, Mr Black — the Headmaster is in there at the moment, speaking with my mother. That is why the room will not open."
I nodded to Helena and leaned back against the opposite wall, closed my eyes, and settled in to wait.
"Mr Black, what would it take for you to forgive me? I know that what I did likely upended some of your plans, and at the time I believed I was doing the right thing. If I faced that choice again, I would tell you the truth. But the past is the past."
"Helena, I do not know what you could do. I do not need anything from you, and whatever I might need I can obtain through my own family. I cannot say I fail to understand why you kept quiet about the diadem. But in short, I will forgive you eventually. Just not yet."
I shook my head. We fell into silence and waited for Dumbledore to leave.
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