Chapter 20: Believe It or Not, I'll Spit You to Death
Wait, that's not right! I have four Monster Cards, what am I afraid of?
king repeatedly told himself to calm down, trying to soothe his own terror. However, as a modern man, his fear of guns was impossible to eliminate. A few days ago, when facing the Wolf-level monster, the Underpants Monster, he had still felt the impulse to fight a bloody battle. But now, facing assault rifles—known as "death gods" in the modern era—his terror was uncontrollable.
*Thump-thump… thump-thump…*
The sound of his heartbeat echoed continuously throughout the grand hall. The children stopped crying, the teachers stopped shouting, and the thugs stopped roaring. Their gazes all converged on him.
The scene became incredibly awkward.
"Hey kid, I'm talking to you! What are you hiding on you? What's making that noise?" The leader of the thugs, wearing a shiitake mushroom mask, walked toward king.
"Mr. King, what should we do?" Mike asked in a low voice. "Should you take them out now?"
king subconsciously blurted out the words he was telling himself: "Calm down!"
"Huh?" Mike paused, mulling it over for a moment before having a revelation. "Mr. King, are you concerned about the children? That's right! If a fight breaks out, even if you could eliminate the thugs quickly, Mr. King, the chaos could still endanger the children's lives. Ah, Mr. King, you truly are thoughtful."
"..."
*Big bro, can you stop with the nonsense and hurry up and find a way to notify the Hero Association for reinforcements? Also, didn't you just say there were a dozen fully armed police officers outside? Where are they? Did they all get diarrhea at the same time?*
*Sigh, my legs are getting a bit weak. Somebody, give me a hand!*
"It's my phone's ringtone." king took out his phone, pressed a button, and waved it around. "If I said my mom was calling me home for dinner, would you believe me?"
"What do you think!?"
The thug leader shot king a vicious glare and chambered a round in his assault rifle. It seemed he was ready to make an example out of king without another word.
Seeing the thug leader's actions, king's heart leaped with anxiety, but his face remained a mask of cold indifference. He said faintly, "My friend, believe it or not, I can kill you with a single mouthful of spit."
"Hmm?"
The thug leader froze for a fraction of a second at his words. He looked up, and his pupils instantly dilated as a thick glob of saliva shot toward him.
*BOOM!*
A deafening explosion erupted right under the thug leader's feet, leaving behind a scorched crater where he had just been standing.
"Ahhh~"
From within the dust and smoke, the thug leader's miserable screams could be heard.
"..."
The thugs were stunned, staring blankly at their screaming leader, unable to process what had happened.
"Does he have a grenade?"
"Damn it, you're asking for death, kid."
The thugs' assault rifles swiveled in unison to aim at king, ready to turn him into a human beehive.
With so many assault rifles aimed at him, Mike from the Hero Association, who was standing behind King, felt a cold sweat drip down his back.
"What? You all... intend to make a move on me?"
king's voice, as cold as ice, echoed through the hall. He slowly removed his hat, revealing the three scars on his left cheek that seemed to scorn the world!
"Have you ever heard the saying? Everyone must pay a price for their choices! Either death, or a life worse than death. Are you all… really going to make a move on me?"
He stood tall and straight, his cold gaze sweeping over all the thugs. In his heart, however, he was roaring, *Don't be impulsive! Impulse is the devil! We can talk this out!*
"Ah! You… You're King?!"
The thugs' eyes widened as they instantly recognized king's identity: the S-Class hero known as the Strongest Man on Earth—King!
*Gulp.*
They swallowed hard, their arms trembling slightly. The muzzles of their guns, aimed at king, instinctively drifted away.
"King!?"
The teachers and children stared at king in a daze. A moment later, they erupted in excited cheers.
"Uncle King, I admire you the most! Can you teach me how to beat up bad guys?"
"Lord King, I'm your fan! I'll be your fan for all eternity!"
"They said a mysterious guest would be coming to the school to speak to the children. I thought it would be one of the kids' fathers or grandfathers. I never imagined it would be King!"
"Ah~ Uncle King, can I take a picture with you?"
"..."
The corner of king's mouth twitched. In such a tense atmosphere, could everyone please stop being star-struck? Show the thugs some respect! If you disregard them like this and they get angry from the humiliation, what will we do if they decide to take us all down with them?
*Sigh, this is so worrying!*
"Rat-a-tat-tat!"
As expected, the thugs flew into a rage. They fired a few shots at the ceiling and bellowed, "Whoever moves again, I'll kill them!"
"Waaah."
The children were frightened into tears, sobbing uncontrollably. The teachers, pale as ghosts, silently comforted the children.
"Kill him! Kill him..."
The thug leader, covered in wounds, suddenly roared, "He's just one man, not a God! What are you afraid of? Hurry up and kill him for me..."
king saw a dangerous look in the thugs' eyes. It seemed the attitude of the teachers and children had provoked their anger, and with their leader's encouragement, the assault rifles in their hands began to rise again.
He immediately spat another mouthful of saliva at the thug leader. "Pah, you scum!"
*BOOM!*
Another explosion rang out.
This time, the thugs were completely dumbfounded. *Holy crap, so the explosion wasn't caused by a grenade, but by King's freaking spit?*
The teachers and children were equally gobsmacked. Is this a power a human should possess? It was too shocking.
*Gulp.*
The thugs swallowed again, their bodies trembling slightly. *Damn it, is this the power of the Strongest Man on Earth? A single mouthful of spit is equivalent to a grenade! He's too powerful, too terrifying! No wonder those monsters that could destroy entire cities were taken out by him with a single punch. We always thought it was an exaggeration, but now we believe it!*
*Speaking of which, if we extrapolate from this power, would a fart from King collapse his own house? Would peeing shoot through the toilet bowl? Would spitting phlegm directly blow up the trash can?*
*Thinking about it this way, being overwhelmingly powerful doesn't seem like such a good thing.*
*Life would be too inconvenient.*
*Oh, right! In that case, wouldn't taking a dump be like… a depth charge? Or maybe a landmine?*
The thugs' thoughts had already drifted to the heavens, their minds running wild.
Seeing that the thug leader had fallen silent, king breathed a sigh of relief. He raised an eyebrow and said faintly, "You can all leave."
"Ah!?"
The thugs stared at king blankly, failing to process what he'd said.
"A person makes countless choices in their lifetime, and every choice is forced by circumstance. I don't know why you would target innocent children, but I know that for you to be forced into this situation, you must have encountered some unspeakable hardship. Otherwise, if you needed money, you should have gone to rob a bank, not come to a kindergarten to take children hostage."
The security at Sunflower Kindergarten was much stronger than at a bank. Yet, the thugs still chose the kindergarten as their target. It was obvious there must be some hidden story behind it.
Of course, the most important reason was that he was scared to death. The moment the thug leader was about to open fire, he had used a Two-star Card: Sprite Man. One mouthful of spit created the force of a grenade. Well, you could say that the thug leader was now covered in his saliva.
However, although Sprite Man was a Tiger-level monster, it had a strong attack but weak defense. Didn't that guy get crushed to death by a billboard? One could imagine that a defense of that level would be pierced by assault rifles in minutes.
Therefore, he had no intention of fighting the thugs to the death. He might as well let them go and have the government and the Hero Association investigate afterward. You're happy, I'm happy, everyone's happy. Yes, that's for the best.
"However..."
His tone suddenly shifted, becoming chillingly cold. "No matter what difficulties you've encountered, the children are innocent. They should not be pawns in your schemes for money or anything else. Remember this: there won't be a next time. This isn't just a warning for you, but a promise to myself. If there is a next time, I will ensure you die with no chance of survival."
As he spoke the final words, his voice radiated a bone-chilling cold that seemed to freeze one's body and soul. All the thugs shivered. This was the intimidating effect of King's reputation at work.
"Retreat!"
A thug in a rabbit mask, who seemed to be the second-in-command, gave the order to retreat. The thugs silently carried their leader away. The rabbit-masked thug took a deep look at king. "Lord King, we will meet again."
With that, he turned and left.
Now it was king's turn to shiver. *Damn it, if you're leaving, just leave! Why do you have to leave me with something to remember you by? You think I don't have enough nightmares as it is?*
(end of chapter)