"Sakiko — would you want to start a band with me?"
Nagasaki Soyo felt it in her bones: this was her chance to show her mother what she was made of!
She'd bring Chiose a little taste of the youth she'd once lived! Stir up her memories, make her love Soyo even more! Heh heh!
Soyo's gaze drifted back and forth between the stage and Sakiko, already lost in a daydream about how brilliantly her future band would shine.
By then, her mother would be able to… well, whether it was her birth mother or Chiose-mama, both of them could sit in the audience and watch her perform!
"Me? Start a band. Really?"
Sakiko Togawa's tone shifted into something she rarely let slip — genuine uncertainty. She pointed at herself, as if Soyo might be playing some elaborate joke.
"Yes!"
"You and me together! We can rope in a few more people later, and then we'll all — start a band!"
This kind-hearted Blue-haired Twin-tailed Girl had been through something not so different from what Soyo herself had faced. She must want to prove herself to someone too — Soyo was sure of it.
It was the first time Nagasaki Soyo had ever made such a bold, proactive move of her own accord. When she glanced over at Yoshiiro Chiose, what she found waiting for her was a look of surprise — and quiet pride.
In that instant, she knew: this step was exactly the right one.
Her mother was pleased with her. She really was!
"I don't play any instruments yet, but I pick things up fast, and I have plenty of free time after school lately — Sakiko, won't you at least think about it?"
"Well, I do play the piano. If we're really starting a band I could be the keyboardist — that's what it's called, right? I'm not really up on all the terminology…"
"So that means you're in?!"
"Sure, starting a band does sound like fun."
"Oh my, are my darling girls really going to do something this wonderfully youthful? How lovely."
Wedged between the two girls like a human divider, Chiose sat in the middle while Soyo and Sakiko leaned around her to talk to each other.
"If you two are going to start a band, I'll be cheering you on every step of the way. How lovely…"
That was the second time she'd said how lovely — and yet Yoshiiro Chiose couldn't seem to stop the quiet, wistful feeling welling up inside her.
[Ah, the golden age of girlhood in full bloom. It's almost identical to my middle school days — well, my middle school days in the Simulation.]
If she let the current Soyo go ahead and form a band on her own like this… would they actually manage to scrape together that C-something band?
Correct? Circle? Or was it Crychic — she couldn't quite remember.
The girls' chatter filled the air in a cheerful, chirping blur. Left briefly to her own devices — a rare occurrence — Yoshiiro Chiose let her eyes drift closed.
Everything was going smoothly.
Sakiko Togawa had said yes to Nagasaki Soyo's proposal, and since today was the last day before the weekend, the corners of Soyo's mouth did not dip once for the entire rest of the day.
Chiose sat on the edge of Soyo's bed. They hadn't gone back to Yoshiiro Chiose's apartment tonight — they'd chosen to stay over at the Nagasaki family's new apartment instead.
Soyo was in the bath. Even at this distance, Chiose could just make out the faint sound of a girl singing.
The sheer joy threaded through that voice carried all the way across the apartment.
"Why is she this happy — is it really just because… she has a chance to earn my approval?"
But I'm not her real mother. I'm only a wicked woman who poured every ounce of care into her during her loneliest, most hollow hours — a woman who played the part of a perfect mother and nothing more.
The thought made even Yoshiiro Chiose let out a quiet, derisive laugh.
"Ah… I may have gone a little too far. I didn't expect Soyo to cling to me even more than Taki and Tomori did back then… you foolish girls, why couldn't even one of you have come along and truly treasured me."
Never mind the Simulation — the Simulation was nothing but a series of hollow replays built from reality, after all.
The real girls, in the real world — they were the truly pitiable ones. None of them had ever received genuine care or love.
Yoshiiro Chiose even found herself thinking that her scheming within the Simulation felt more like a kind of reward for them.
A strange thought, that.
Well — perhaps it was because no one had ever schemed for their sake in reality either. They had never even experienced love with ulterior motives behind it.
"Xiǎo Jīng… it's been one year — or is it two — since I've seen my little sister."
The longing for family had been building steadily, and now Chiose found herself missing the sunlight of the real world more and more with each passing day.
Though she couldn't say for certain whether it was because of those golden rings in her eyes, but Chiose's memory had been growing sharper and sharper.
Sharp enough that she could still recall, with perfect clarity, exactly how many split ends had been sticking up from Taki's head when they'd crossed paths in the real world, just a few days before the Simulation had begun.
But the clearer her memories became, the more easily melancholy crept in — especially when it came to her memories of the earlier Simulations. Those were etched too deep.
She suspected she'd carry them to the grave.
Chiose idly scrolled through her phone, browsing through an encyclopaedia of ways to die.
How should she go this time? Drowning? Terrifying — absolutely not. Continue getting stabbed to death by someone? No, not memorable enough… Perhaps she'd stick with illness. It was, after all, the method that suited her best.
Every time Yoshiiro Chiose died of illness in the Simulation, she felt as though it was some kind of sign.
Only by experiencing a simulated death from sickness could one truly understand the desperate longing for recovery in the real world — and that strange disease that bore her own name had always sat uneasily in the back of her mind.
"Mama, what are you doing?"
"Me? …I'm looking up instruments for Soyo, of course. Little Soyo is starting a band, isn't she?"
Yoshiiro Chiose smoothly switched tabs. Soyo had just finished washing up — her wet hair hung down and obscured her view, so she couldn't make out a thing on the screen.
"Hm? I don't even know what I want to play yet… does Mama have any suggestions?"
"How about… guitar or bass? I know both, so I could teach you, Soyo."
Saying it aloud, Chiose suddenly remembered that Crychic in the real world had apparently only lasted two weeks…
Ah — and two weeks had been enough to break Takamatsu Tomori so thoroughly. So what would it feel like for Soyo, who was even more starved of love? What would she go through?
If anything, the real Soyo had probably suffered even more than Tomori.
That was the conclusion Yoshiiro Chiose had drawn from the depth of Soyo's attachment to her.
"Then I'll… go with bass? It sounds like it'd be fun."
Young Nagasaki Soyo had no idea what her choice meant — just as she had no idea that every choice she made was quietly steering her down a particular road.
"Bass, is it… how wonderful. Same as me, back in my day. My dearest friend and I had that same combination — I played bass, and she sang."
"Really?! Then I'll become a bassist just like Mama!"
[Perfect! My instincts were right all along!]
Droplets of water still fell from the ends of her hair, but the delighted Soyo didn't pay them the slightest attention.
She felt more certain than ever that her plan was going to work. She would carry on her mother's band story — and become the child who made her mother proud!
Sakiko Togawa… heh heh, Mama dotes on you too — said you were sensible, said you were impressive! But I, Nagasaki Soyo, will prove that I'm the one who makes Yoshiiro Chiose the proudest of all!
Hands on her hips, Soyo hummed and preened with delight, while Yoshiiro Chiose watched her with the fond, weary look of someone observing a loveable little fool.
And that was how things stood.
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