So I didn't die. Or maybe I did and this is what comes after. Honestly, the situation is still very much up for debate, but what is absolutely certain is this my vision is complete and utter garbage. Not slightly blurry, not, I forgot my glasses blurry, but the kind of blurry where the entire world looks like it's been rendered in the lowest possible settings. Shapes exist, colors exist, but details? Gone. Faces? Non-existent.
Everything is just vague blobs shifting around in a hazy mess, and after a few seconds of trying to focus, I came to a groundbreaking conclusion: babies have terrible vision. Truly terrible. This is not speculation anymore, this is firsthand experience, and I would like to formally complain to whoever designed the human body because starting life like this feels like a scam.
As if that wasn't bad enough, there was another, far more immediate problem why the hell was everything moving so much? I couldn't see properly, couldn't understand my surroundings, and yet my entire existence felt like it was being shaken around nonstop. Up, down, left, right it was as if whoever was holding me had mistaken childcare for some kind of endurance sport.
Was this normal? Was I being carried? Rocked? Or had I somehow been reborn into the hands of someone participating in an off-road marathon with a baby as extra luggage?
Ma'am, I wanted to say, with all due respect, I am a fragile item. Please Handle with care. But of course, none of that came out. Instead, what escaped my mouth was a weak and pathetic, "Waa…uhm...Whaa" which, to my horror, confirmed another truth.
I had zero control over my body. Fantastic. Reincarnated and immediately nerfed into uselessness.
And don't even get me started on expectations. Every single reincarnation story I had ever read had lied to me. All of them. Ah yes, upon rebirth, the protagonist is welcomed by a gentle, beautiful mother, her face filled with warmth and love…Where is that? Where? I can't see shit. For all I know, my mother could be a floating potato with arms. There is no confirmation, no emotional reunion, no soft, heartwarming moment just motion sickness and blurred existence. If this is the premium reincarnation package, I would like a refund.
Eventually either because the movement stopped or because my brain simply gave up trying to process it all a heavy wave of drowsiness washed over me. It wasn't gradual, it hit instantly, like a switch being flipped. One moment I was internally complaining about my situation, and the next, everything faded into darkness as I fell asleep without resistance.
When I woke up again, the difference was immediate and almost suspiciously comforting. No shaking, no chaos just stillness. I was lying down, supported, warm, and for the first time since… well, since whatever happened earlier, I felt something close to peace. The surface beneath me was soft enough to be comfortable but firm enough to keep me stable, and for a brief moment, I allowed myself to relax. Okay now this is nice, I thought, appreciating the rare absence of suffering. Unfortunately, that peace lasted all of five seconds before a new problem emerged hunger.
And I know how babies ask for food. I didn't need instructions to understand what came next. Instinct took over completely. Taking in as much air as my tiny lungs allowed, I let out a full-force cry loud, sharp, and honestly impressive considering my size. "WAAAAAAAAAA!" The sound echoed, raw and desperate, and for a split second, I felt a strange sense of accomplishment. That was, until other cries answered back. One from the left. Another from somewhere farther away. Then more. Different tones, different rhythms, but unmistakably the same thing babies crying. A lot of them.
My mind paused, trying to process this new information. What…Wait, I thought slowly, don't tell me Was I not alone? Did I have siblings? Twins? Triplets? A whole damn nursery full of competition? The idea was both confusing and slightly concerning, but before I could reach any solid conclusion, a figure approached.
Still blurry. Still impossible to identify properly. But based on the general shape and movement, I assumed it was a woman hopefully my mother. This time, when she picked me up, the motion was significantly gentler, which I appreciated more than I could express. Something was placed against my mouth, and instinctively, I latched onto it. Milk. Warm, consistent, and immediately satisfying. My body relaxed almost instantly as I began to drink, the earlier panic fading into quiet focus.
And yet, even in that moment of relief, my brain, being the problematic entity that it is, couldn't help but think...Hold on. This wasn't what I expected. Where were the boobs? I mean not in a weird way, just… biologically speaking, wasn't that how this was supposed to work? Weren't babies supposed to be breastfed?
This was a bottle. A perfectly functional, efficient bottle, sure, but still. Man, I thought, mildly disappointed, what kind of false advertising is this? Not that I had any real experience to compare it with. In my previous life, I had been, for lack of a better term, completely inexperienced. A full-on virgin. Never seen boobs in real life. Only theoretical knowledge. And, well… a certain folder on my laptop labeled "Study Material." Strictly educational, of course.
Pushing those thoughts aside because even I had enough self-awareness to realize how ridiculous this situation was I focused on finishing the milk. There was no point complaining. Food was food, survival came first, and honestly, it tasted pretty good.
Once I was done, the exhaustion returned almost immediately, heavier than before, dragging me back into sleep without giving me a chance to resist. Around me, the other cries gradually faded as well, replaced by a quiet stillness that suggested everyone else had also been fed and settled.
And just like that, time began to pass.