[Current Location: Kyoto Ryokan - "Private" Open-Air Bath]
[Current SP: 460 | Level: 3 | HP: 150/150]
[Active Quest: "Survive the Mixed Bath"]
[Status: Peeping Protection Lv.1 Active. Danger Sense Lv.1 screaming. Nosebleed Risk: 97%]
"This is a trap," I whispered to Issei as we stood outside the bamboo gate to the bath. "This is how male characters die in anime."
"Bro," Issei had tears in his eyes, "this is how male characters go to heaven. There's a difference."
[Issei Hyoudou: Bro Points +10. His dream is your dream.]
Rias's voice came from the other side. "Kazuki. Issei. The bath is reserved for the ORC. Come in or we'll drag you in."
That was somehow more threatening than Riser.
[Ding! Quest Reminder: "Survive the Mixed Bath"]
[Objectives:]
[1. Do NOT look below the neckline - Failure = Death by Rias]
[2. Do NOT get a nosebleed - Failure = Death by blood loss]
[3. Do NOT let Akeno "slip" near you - Failure = Death by pleasure]
[Reward: 150 SP, Skill: "Poker Face Lv.1"]
I took a deep breath. "System, activate everything. Iron Body, Lightning Resist, Peeping Protection, Danger Sense, Pervert's Intuition. All of it."
[System: All defensive skills active. Emotional damage still possible. Good luck.]
We slid the door open. Steam everywhere. The moon was out. The bath was huge, carved from stone, surrounded by bamboo. And in it...
"Ara, you boys are late~" Akeno was up to her shoulders in water, hair pinned up, smiling like a demon.
Rias was leaning on a rock, eyes closed, red hair floating in the water. "If either of you stares, I'll boil the water. With you in it."
Koneko was in the corner, only her eyes and cat ears visible above water. "...Perverts."
Asia was bright red and hiding behind a towel. "I-I've never done a mixed bath before!"
Issei and I saluted, grabbed towels, and entered like we were defusing a bomb.
[Peeping Protection Lv.1: Active. Your eyes are being forced to look at the sky. Vision -40%.]
"Damn it, I can't see!" I hissed.
"That's the point, Bro!" Issei whispered back. "The system is cockblocking us!"
We sat on the opposite side, sinking into the water. It was actually amazing. For 3 seconds.
Then Akeno spoke. "Kazuki-kun, how is your Lightning Resistance? Should we test it again~?"
She raised a wet hand and a tiny spark danced between her fingers.
[Danger Sense Lv.1: DANGER. DANGER. DANGER.]
[HP: 150 → 150. Mental HP: 10/150]
"N-no thank you! I'm good! Very resistant! All good here!"
[Ding! New Emergency Quest: "Akeno's Test"]
[Description: Akeno is going to "slip" and fall toward you. Catch her or dodge. Both have consequences.]
[Reward: 80 SP if you survive with dignity]
[R-18 Warning: Physical contact incoming. Fade to black protocol standby.]
"Ara, my hand is slippery~" Akeno stood up. The water and steam did most of the work censoring, but not all of it.
[Peeping Protection Lv.1: CRITICAL FAILURE. You saw. You definitely saw.]
[Nosebleed Warning: 99%]
[Iron Body Lv.1: Preventing death by blood loss... barely.]
She "slipped" right in my direction.
Time slowed. I had three options:
Catch her = Rias kills me, but I get to touch Akeno. Worth it?Dodge = Akeno hits water, gets mad, electrocutes me later.Use Trickster's Hand =????
"TRICKSTER'S HAND!" I panicked.
[Target: The towel Akeno was about to grab]
Yoink. A towel appeared in my hand from my Inventory.
Akeno fell, but I shoved the towel at her face last second. She grabbed it on instinct, wrapping herself up mid-fall and landing in the water with a splash instead of on me.
Silence.
Akeno surfaced, towel secured, hair dripping. She stared at me. Then she started laughing. "Ufufu... Ufufufufu~ He used his Sacred Gear... to preserve my modesty~?"
[Ding! Akeno Himejima: Affection +15. Status: Delighted, Very Interested. Current: 25]
[Rias Gremory: Affection +5. Status: Surprised, Approved. Current: 22]
[Koneko Toujou: Respect +10. Status: "Not a total idiot."]
[Issei Hyoudou: Bro Points -5. Status: "Bro, you fumbled the bag."]
[Ding! Emergency Quest "Akeno's Test" Complete!]
[Rewards: +80 SP. You kept your dignity. Barely.]
"Nice save, Kazuki," Rias said, actually smiling a little. "Most men would have... made other choices."
The tension bled out of the air. The rest of the bath was... actually peaceful. We talked about the yokai tag game, Riser, and training. No one died. No one got vaporized.
[Ding! Main Quest "Survive the Mixed Bath" Complete!]
[Rewards: +150 SP, Skill Unlocked: "Poker Face Lv.1" - You can now lie to Rias with only 50% chance of her noticing.]
[Total SP: 690. You are rich.]
As we were getting out, wrapped in towels, the System pinged one last time.
[Ding! Post-Bath Bonus Quest: "Peeping Attempt Detected"]
[Description: You technically saw Akeno for 0.3 seconds. Peeping Protection failed. As punishment, you must do 100 push-ups.]
[Reward: +1 STR]
[System: I don't make the rules. I just enforce them.]
I looked at Issei. "Worth it?"
He was crying again. "Every second, Bro. Every second."
[Days Until Rating Game: 8]
[Days Until Yokai Tag: 2]
[Days Until Rias Forgets You Saw Akeno: Never]
[End of Chapter 8]