The setting sun stretched long shadows across the plain. The air was thick with the sticky smell of frog fluids, along with... the headache-inducing chuunibyou bickering unique to the Crimson Demon Clan.
"I'm telling you! Yunyun, that Light of Saber of yours, the one that can only slice up frogs, is nothing but a child's toy compared to my Explosion Magic!" Megumin was being carried over Kazuma's shoulder like a sack, but her mouth showed no sign of stopping. "A true Wizard pursues ultimate romance, the beauty of destruction unleashed in a single instant! Someone like you, who chases stability and efficiency, has no right to call herself my rival!"
"Waaah... But, but if I hadn't stepped in just now, everyone would have been eaten by frogs!" Yunyun followed beside them, flustered and red-faced, her hands twisting nervously in front of her chest. "Besides, Explosion Magic can only be used once a day, and once you use it, someone has to carry you around. In real combat, that just makes trouble for your companions! Megumin, you've been like this since school. You couldn't even scrape together money for lunch, but you still acted like you were number one in the world..."
"That was to temper my will! What would you know, you overdeveloped, friendless girl who relies on underhanded tricks like that to draw men's eyes!"
"F-friendless girl?! I-I'm trying hard to make friends too! I greeted Kōichi-san very politely just now!"
Tears were already gathering in Yunyun's eyes, and her voice had begun to shake.
Kōichi and Kazuma Satou exchanged a look. The instant their gazes met, countless pieces of information passed between them as part of their Devilish Alliance.
Kōichi's eyes said: Hey, Kazuma, did you see that? She's a proper Crimson Demon Clan member! She can cast advanced magic, fight continuously, and... she looks incredibly easy to bully!
Kazuma's eyes said: I get it! I completely get it! Compared to that Explosion maniac who can only fire once a day, Yunyun is practically a Goddess descended from heaven! And did you see the way her boobs bounced during that declaration? That was the weight of justice!
"Ahem! Alright, alright, you two elites of the Crimson Demon Clan, stop arguing." Kōichi hurriedly put on what he thought was his gentlest smile and interrupted them. "Yunyun, we really owe you for earlier. To thank you, how about we treat you to a feast tonight at the best tavern in Axel? While we're at it, we'd love to hear about Megumin's... heroic exploits back at school."
"Huh? R-really?" Yunyun froze. The tears that had been about to fall instantly retreated, replaced by flustered, overwhelming joy. "You'll treat me to a meal... and listen to me talk? I-is this the legendary companion dinner? Does that mean... I can become friends with everyone too?"
"Of course! In fact, we would greatly welcome a powerful and sensible teammate like you!" Kazuma Satou leaned in as well, rubbing his hands together eagerly. "Compared to a certain freeloading Explosion maniac, Yunyun, you're basically the savior of our Party!"
"Hey! You two! Isn't poaching someone right in front of me a little too blatant?!" Megumin struggled wildly on Kōichi's shoulder. "Yunyun! Don't accept! One of these men is a pervert, and the other one is also a pervert! They'll devour you!"
"It's okay, Megumin!" Yunyun was completely lost in the immense happiness of making friends, as though little pink flowers were blooming behind her. "Kōichi-san and Kazuma-san both seem like very kind people! Since they invited me so sincerely, I-I can't be rude, can I?"
Kōichi and Kazuma exchanged another devilish look that said the plan was going perfectly.
...
Inside the tavern of the Axel Adventurers Guild, the lights blazed brightly, and the noise was almost loud enough to blow off the roof.
At a long table piled with whole roast pig, fried chicken legs, and several bottles of expensive sparkling wine, Kōichi and Kazuma Satou sat on either side of Yunyun, wearing radiant smiles that only professional swindlers could pull off.
"Come on, Yunyun, don't hold back! This is Axel's famous Giant Toad leg tempura. You worked hard earlier, so eat as much as you like!" Kōichi enthusiastically piled food onto Yunyun's plate, his voice so sincere it could move someone to tears. "A Crimson Demon Clan member like you, powerful, polite, and adorable on top of that, is nothing short of a miracle in the Adventurer world!"
"Exactly, Yunyun." Kazuma skillfully poured wine beside her, a calculating light flickering in his eyes. "Look, our Party might seem a little... special, but we're seriously lacking core combat power. If we had an expert like you, someone who can cast advanced magic over and over, wouldn't we be unstoppable? When the rewards come in, we can split them fifty-fifty... no, even sixty-forty works!"
Yunyun held a chicken leg in her hand, tears of emotion already shimmering in her eyes.
In all her life, this was the first time so many people had gathered around to care about her, and the first time she had felt the warmth of being needed.
"Sniff... Kōichi-san, Kazuma-san... you're such good people!" Yunyun sobbed as she bit into the chicken leg, speaking with her mouth half full. "No one has ever been this nice to me before... Everyone usually avoids me, or thinks I'm strange... I-I'm really touched..."
"Then it's settled!" Kōichi slammed the table and made as if to pull out his Adventurer Card. "No time like the present. Tonight, you officially join our..."
"W-wait!"
Just as Yunyun was about to nod, the corner of her eye caught Megumin sitting across from her, stuffing cake into her mouth while letting out a mocking chuckle.
"Hmph. Yunyun, you really are as easy to buy off as ever." Megumin brushed the crumbs from her hands, her eyes shining with the wisdom of someone who had seen through everything. "Once you join this Party, you won't be my rival anymore. You'll be my junior. Every day, you'll have to follow my orders, polish my staff, and even wash my clothes after I cast Explosion Magic... Are you sure that's the kind of rivalry you want?"
Yunyun's body suddenly stiffened.
She set down the chicken leg, and her head, which had been dizzy with emotion, cleared in an instant.
She looked at Megumin, then at Kōichi and Kazuma, whose faces were practically screaming that they wanted more labor.
"...I-I'm sorry! Kōichi-san, Kazuma-san!" Yunyun abruptly stood and bowed deeply to the two of them, her impressive chest swaying violently with the motion. "Your invitation makes me very happy, but my pride as a member of the Crimson Demon Clan won't allow me to join as I am now! I came to Axel to defeat Megumin and prove that I'm the stronger Wizard! If I team up with her before defeating her, I'll never be able to hold my head high again!"
"Huh?!" Kōichi and Kazuma screamed in despair at the same time.
"So, even though I really want to be friends with everyone, please allow me to decline joining the Party for now!" Yunyun's face was red, but her gaze was unusually firm. "I'll keep training hard as a solitary Wizard until the day I can defeat Megumin fair and square! When that time comes... if you're still willing to invite me..."
With that, as if afraid she might change her mind, Yunyun grabbed the two remaining pieces of bread from the table, covered her face, and rushed out of the tavern.
A deathly silence fell inside the tavern.
"...Kōichi, did we just waste all that money?"
Kazuma stared at the table full of expensive leftovers, his voice filled with despair toward the world.
"...Calm down, Kazuma." Kōichi wiped his face, his gaze sharpening. "At least now we know that girl really is an honest person who cares about bonds. As long as Megumin stays in our Party, she'll fall into our trap sooner or later... But for now, I just want to finish this meal. Every bite is our hard-earned money!"