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Chapter 9 - chapter 9: Something has to break

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After that night… everything felt unstable.

Even when nothing was happening.

Even in silence.

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Adrian started avoiding me again.

Not completely.

But enough for me to notice.

Enough for it to hurt.

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When I asked him why, he didn't give a clear answer.

He just said:

"You make it harder to control."

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And then he disappeared before I could respond.

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I told myself I should be relieved.

That this was better.

Safer.

Normal again.

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But it didn't feel normal.

It felt empty.

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Even Tunde noticed the difference.

"You've been thinking about that guy again," he said one afternoon.

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I frowned slightly.

"I don't think about him that much."

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Tunde gave me a look.

The kind that already knows the truth before you speak it.

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"You like him," he said simply.

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That made me stop walking.

---

"I don't," I replied quickly.

Too quickly.

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He sighed.

"You don't have to lie to me."

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That sentence stayed with me longer than I wanted it to.

---

Because the worst part?

He was right.

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That night, I went out again.

Not because I planned to.

But because I couldn't sit still anymore.

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And like always…

he was there.

---

But this time, he didn't step forward.

Didn't speak immediately.

Just watched me.

From a distance.

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"You shouldn't keep doing this," Adrian said finally.

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I laughed softly.

"Coming outside?"

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"No," he replied.

"Coming to me."

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That hit differently.

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I crossed my arms.

"Then stop showing up."

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A long silence.

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Then he finally spoke again.

His voice lower than usual.

Strained.

---

"I can't."

---

That one sentence changed the air.

---

I stepped closer.

Slowly.

Carefully.

---

"Why not?" I asked.

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He looked at me then.

Really looked.

Like the answer was sitting right in front of him… and it scared him.

---

"Because I tried," he said quietly.

"And every time I stay away…"

He paused.

---

"…it gets worse."

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My chest tightened.

"Worse how?"

---

His jaw clenched slightly.

"Worse for you."

---

Silence again.

Thicker this time.

---

"You're acting like I'm fragile," I said.

---

"You are," he replied instantly.

Then softer—

"And I don't trust myself around you."

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That made my heart drop slightly.

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"So what happens now?" I asked.

---

He didn't answer immediately.

But when he did…

his voice had changed completely.

More serious.

More final.

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"Now I stop pretending this isn't dangerous."

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A pause.

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"And you decide if you still want to stand here when it stops being safe."

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I should have left.

That would have been the smart thing.

The safe thing.

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But I didn't move.

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And that silence between us…

felt like the beginning of something neither of us could control anymore.

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