PoV - Rachumel, Nuisance Extrodinaire
"Is this your card!"
"No."
"…This one?"
"No."
"This one!"
"No."
"Drat, I'm out of cards." I stared down at the pile of crude playing cards I made to amuse myself for magic tricks before turning back to the grumpy angel before me. "Wait… just a sec, there's something just near your ear…" With a flourishing sleight of hand, I slid the card from my robe's sleeve and "pulled" it out of his ear. "Ta-da!"
Penemue clapped excitedly at my card trick, and Baraqiel stared down at the card in my hand with his ever present frown. "…That was not in my ear. It was a trick."
"Well, yeah-"
"I would have felt such a thing in the cavity there. You could not have put it there."
"Okay-"
"Thus, you must have devised a spell that hides the sensory information of an object, and then used an illusion to hide yourself from my senses as you placed it, all directly without me noticing." Baraquiel nodded to himself, having apparently figured out my 'trick'. "Invaluable, Rachumel. No wonder Father allows you to wander around the Fifth Heaven. Please, share this secret spell of yours with me."
Penemue looked dazzled by Baraquiel's dissection, peering with stars in her eyes at me. I stared blankly at the grumpy stooge of a Watcher for about ten seconds before I drooped from exasperation. "There was no magic. It was just sleight of hand. I hid the card in my sleeve and just had you not notice it when I shuffled the cards."
"Oh." Barachiel absorbed that, and Penemue… still looked like her mind was blown. "Impressive. You did a magic trick without magic, Rachumel. Well done." He nodded curtly, and stood, the giant lug looming over me. "I would like to see more of these magicless magic tricks. I enjoy them greatly."
"…Sure, brother. Any time." Baraquiel nodded again, and the stoic walrus moved away deeper into the research rooms of the Grigori while Penemue just continued to smile at me.
She's done that ever since she first met me, honestly. Always just… blankly happy to see me. Never tired or exasperated with my antics. Kinda weird, that.
I think she vibrated in place once. Made those titties bounce, let me tell ya.
It's been about sixty-seven years since I reincarnated here, but to be honest, it only feels like ten. You don't really notice the time difference as an immortal until you look back and realize you haven't talked to one of your siblings in over a year… and they're just happy to see you again. Dad reassured me that none of my siblings were mad at me over not visiting, because I'm still operating on a human sense of scale. She recounted a tale that once Gabriel and Michael failed to talk to each other for over five years, but neither made note of it.
Supposedly, I'll grow out of the human mindset someday.
Not sure how I feel about that.
Outside of existential crises, well… It looks like things pretty much everywhere are heating up. I stole some of Helel's older reports to figure out what's going on on Earth, but so far, it just seems to be the beginning of the other pantheons touching down. Gaia and Ouranos are arguing, Odin and his brothers have already cornered Ymir, and the Heavens over in what will be China are starting to order themselves… I think? Or maybe they already ordered themselves. We can't really see what's going on.
Dad and Indra have always had a grudge match on the future sight front, but apparently it's gotten way worse since I was reincarnated. We really don't know what's going on in the East anymore.
Eh, fuck the Deva. Overhyped little bitches, Dad was way cooler. Indra doesn't even have a rocking set of tits that I want to bury my face in.
Anyway, back to Heaven matters. I think skirmishes might have broken out? I know Helel has been getting… very opinionated on the fact that angels have intervened to save human villages. Sometimes an angel or two were lost, and even if Dad revived them, it taxed Her.
She's been getting more and more exhausted, and I know it was from solo sealing The Beast, and I just…
I didn't know what to do.
I covered for her when she asked, I kept up my duties, and made her laugh when I could, but I'm not some isekai super-genius who managed to figure out atomic physics from a high school textbook I haven't cracked open in a century. I'm not some super analytical badass who can predict someone twenty years and four parallel universes in advance. Fuck, I can't even figure out how to grow more wings! I don't give a shit that it takes centuries for angels to grow more power, I'm a fucking isekai! That has to mean… something!
…right?
…Most of the Seraphs have noticed her exhaustion. It's why Helel has been getting more belligerent about his siblings being sent out to protect humans.
I get his point of view. I've consoled some of my more battle-competent siblings after their death by monster. Turns out, even angels get PTSD from getting chomped in half.
Being in Heaven helps, though. The Land of Good Vibes reigned supreme!
I brought my attention back from my sudden tangent and noticed Penemue was still here, just happily watching me, when I must have spaced out for more than five minutes or so.
"Sorry to ignore you, big sis," I offered, and let a sheepish smile naturally cover my face.
"Oh, no worry, Rachumel. I know you must have many thoughts going on at once. It's just nice to spend some time with you," she said, patting her lap in invitation.
Don't mind if I do! "Thanks, Penemue. Did you want to see another magic trick?" I asked as I floated to sit in her lap, where she hugged me tight to her chest, and began, like all my other siblings, to pet my hair. Man, Penemue was just the nicest. I swear I've zoned out for like, hours at times, and she has always quietly waited for me to reply. I guess that's the difference between being born immortal, and being born with a human soul ride-along that has an established sense of time already.
"I'd enjoy anything you show me. Do you just want to talk about your day?"
"Well, sure. So today, I think I made my sword move a little when I went to clean it!"
PoV - Penemue (Benemune), Yandere Cuckqueen Extrodinaire
I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him.
My body was still, focused entirely on the senses I could use to observe my love. The smell of his shampoo, fruity and clean, always differed depending on which of our sisters managed to drag him to bathe with them. Those lucky bitches, I wanted to watch.
I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him.
The sound of his voice, the tenor pleasing to the ear, strong and kind and excited to be alive, so much more than any other voice in these heavens. I want to hear my name from his lips again.
I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him.
My touch adored the fluffiness of his auburn locks, his skin perfectly smooth and blemish free, an adorable young teenage boy's face crafted to perfection. His hands are so smooth and soft.
I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him.
The kisses I've pressed to his cheeks when he leaves here linger on in my mind, the taste of him stuck like a memory on loop. I want to kiss his beautiful lips.
I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him.
I burn the memory of the shape of his happiness, his laughter, his befuddled looks, his exasperation, the pained looks when he bathes with us. I want to hold hands and love him all the more.
I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him.
I listen to every word he says and catalogue it, from the benign to the n-naughty. I don't know what he means by some of it, but I will learn someday. For him, I would learn everything.
I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him.
I am certain Rachumel will figure out a way for us to have c-coitus without falling. He is brilliant. He is so inventive. There is no genius like him. No one is as kind and thoughtful as him. In eventual coitus, I am sure he will be unmatched! All of my sisters and I shall be his to play with!
I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him. I love him.
I will be patient, Rachumel, my love. I will give you everything I am. Ara ara~
PoV - Rachumel, Unknowingly Escaped the Clutches of a Shota's Natural Predator
Penemue is a great listener. It's always nice to spend time with her. For now, with all my chores done, and Elo's not here for me to flirt with, I content myself with a nice flight around the Third Heaven, or the proper Afterlife most humans and mortals think of.
This place is fucking huge. I spend my time flying around the branches of the Tree of Life, getting in some aerial practice like I'm the protagonist of Ace Combat.
I was never very good at that game, but damn did the soundtrack slap.
"I'll try spinning, that's a good trick," I joked to myself, twirling around one of the large branches to practice dodging at high speed. Personally speaking, I thought I was one of the better fliers up here in Heaven. No one really practiced as much as I do, or does it as often. I mean, I've practiced my control over my flight so much that it doesn't even cost energy anymore.
Kinda like Goku in the Cell Games, in having mastered Super Saiyan One's upkeep to just stay powered up as long as he wants. Yeah, that's more accurate. The cost of flight was lower than my natural mana regeneration.
Eh, my reserves weren't amazing as a two-winged, so I just kinda naturally fell into control instead of bigger blasts. I will never say and have never said no to throwing around a Holy Kamehameha…
But I have won a lot more spars with my siblings with a simple flashbang and the butt of a spear poked to the gut than I ever have with a flashy bomb or spell.
Kokobiel laughed when he saw my win-streak of 53 was achieved with literally the exact same strategy of "Flashbang-Stab." And not in the "hahaha I am a normal person and I find this amusing to me" kind of way.
Kokobiel giggled. Like a school girl. With glee.
And then announced I was his favorite brother.
I don't know how to feel about being his favorite brother. He's… not anywhere as insane as the fanfics made him sound?
I wonder if I can prevent his Fall… Well, that was a topic for another time, because outside of Helel and the Grigori, I didn't know when anyone Falls. When I asked Dad, She looked me in the eye and said "I don't know anymore", which definitely was not the words you want to hear from a God with Clairvoyance so powerful She plotted out the next millenia of moves.
Discarding that terrifying line of thought, I flew up to the top of the tree and basked in the sunlight there. It wasn't quite the same as Earth, but it was close enough for me to indulge, especially since I couldn't get sunburned anymore.
Of course,being left alone with my thoughts alone usually meant one of three things happened.
One, someone interrupted it because I know God fears my brain in isolation. Probably.
Two, I acutely remembered the fact I am surrounded by absolute babes and can't do anything about that other than fruitlessly daydream, because doing something more threatens my sisters' entire purpose in life and their happiness.
Three, I spiraled into all the past media I can dig up for magic ideas and how I can convince Dad to spread it around to make humanity better. Chakra's a bust, but I barely remembered Naruto anyway. Hrm, maybe more spiritual stuff? Like Bleach, or Shaman… I want to say King? Something with infusing their spiritual energy into an object for more power, or like the shinigami spell system? Hrm, humans in general don't have a lot of soul energy, just a shitload of potential that could be made into soul energy or whatever other endeavor they focused their prowess on. I'll bring it up to Father with the rest of my ideas.
Negima magic was a solid idea, but my math skills were shit. It was going to take someone like Merlin to bring it into effect for humanity overall, maybe Solomon if he's a mage here like in Fate, but if we tie the idea of magic to Dad's Heavenly System as opposed to whatever the fuck "imagination magic" was, it'll probably stop at least two-thirds of humans from trying to deal with devils. There's always bad apples.
Huh. I wonder if this world's witch hunts were based on human mages actually dealing with devils, in addition to just the general need of humanity to occasionally be total shitheads. Food for thought.
In any case, any type of math-based magic - and I grumped at myself for considering it - will be benefited by Fate's magic circuits, if only for the ability to record information and calculation components. But that was a mutation of the soul, and I didn't think Father would be overly enthused by the idea. We will need to see how it functioned in practice before any attempts were made to place it in a human body.
I wasn't going to rule out the idea of Pathfinder or Dungeons & Dragons magic out - the Vancian style magic system was flawed but versatile, and there are a lot of ways to bend the rules, if you're clever. Magic items, in particular, had hard-carried even someone who just honed their body. The idea of Paladins for the Church's supernatural division makes me slightly giddy, but then again, I played the class in pretty much any table-top game I could. The Holy Avenger sword-
Holy Avenger… Magic items… Alchemy? You know, I think I remembered DxD's Excalibur was made through human alchemy or something. Maybe that's the natural extension of humanity? They were and are a tool-using race, crafted items to make someone better seemed a natural line of thought. The first thought of Alchemy was Full Metal Alchemist, but with how wild DxD's power scaling was, I doubted that's the right call in particular. I momentarily cursed my past life for not having watched more diverse anime, but what was done was done.
I was so wrapped up in my thoughts that I missed hearing the flaps of wings behind me until her light weight latched onto my back, arms around my neck. "Hey, idiot brother. What are you doing just flying around?"
I craned my head around to see blonde hair and blue eyes gaze curiously at me, and currently one of the only angels actually smaller than me. "Oh hey, Mittelt," I answered, angling back away from the tree to just glide on the air currents to help reduce the magic cost of carrying both myself and her. "Just thinking about the future and all that. Ways to help humanity."
"Oooooh," she replied, drawing out the words. "I thought it was the usual random nonsense and naughty thoughts you're obsessed with."
"Well, now that one of my cute sisters is around, those will probably return in a moment." I gave a cheeky grin.
Mittelt retaliated by pulling on my cheek, giving me a legendary loli pout. "You better not be thinking about my butt, moron."
"I wasn't until you mentioned that thicc tushy. It's spankable."
"I swear, I share one bath with Ray-Ray and you, and suddenly you're fixated on my butt. It's not that big, you meanie!"
"I'm not being mean, it's just the truth. That big booty don't lie, Mittelt." Father made a legal loli with the fattest spankable ass. Straight up, Lex Luthor would fucking steal this cake. Bless Elohim's good taste.
I ignored the utter exasperation I could feel from my connection with Dad. Oh hey, she's back.
"You're weird, Rachumel." Mittelt let go of my cheek and rolled her eyes. "Pretty sure Dad says these thoughts are a sin, dummy."
"Thoughts aren't sins, actions are," I rebutted, and she rolled her eyes again. "I haven't done anything naughty other than speak my mind honestly. Especially about my sisters."
"Pft." Mittelt loosened her arms from my neck to spin around, and floated in front of me. "Okay Rachumel. Keep telling yourself that. 'Honestly', please."
"Oh? Does my sister not believe I wouldn't love her body as much as Raynare's or Kalawarna's?" I smirked, and flew up to look my smallest sister face to face. "Don't worry, Mittelt. I'll figure out a way to make love to you too, just you wait." I watched her face explode in a blush, and I pressed the attack. Mittelt was the angel strong on offense and awful at defense. "I'll love your perfect hands, and your lithe body, and hold you close as you squirm from the love I'll give you. I'll play with your big butt and teach you to love it as much as I do." Loli wasn't exactly my favorite type, but as a man, I subscribed to a truth beyond mortal ken.
I liked girls - big girls and pretty kitty girls, really witty girls and singing ditty girls. I liked the leggy girls, with the nice thighs, and a good chest, no matter what size. I liked the belly folds, I loved the six packs, really tall queens and the short stacks. From the mild girls, to the wild girls, I loved the mothers, and loli that smothers.
Girls were hot.
Mittelt, predictably, explodes as a true tsundere does. "IDIOTSTUPIDMORONPERVERT!" Without a word, she dashed away flying as fast as her little wings carried her.
Ah. Music to my ears.
Speaking of which, Dad was back, which means it's time for a chat.
The heavy wood of Dad's favorite door slammed open as I delivered a flying double-kick to enter the throne room. I tumbled through the air, righting myself to pause just before God Herself as She was working on Her Heavenly System. "What's up, Elo, how's my future wife?"
"I am your Father."
"And one day, you'll be leg-locking me and calling me 'Daddy', so we're both not gonna care about that incest. Besides, Adam and Eve, so you don't really care about it." The Lord of Angels grunted at my words, not deigning to acknowledge them, which wasn't a no~! Her hands were busy coding, though. "Sacred Gear stuff?"
"The beginnings of it."
"You should implement a failsafe so the Gear doesn't work if a human changes into a different race. Should prevent the other Supernatural from trying to steal them."
"Still afraid of Ajuka's Evil Pieces?"
"Uh, duh? He named them Evil Pieces. Not even Devil Pieces. Granted, this is the autist who decided 'Life is Math' so I shouldn't be too surprised he's both pure evil and bad at names."
Dad paused with a muffled laugh. "Assuming he's still born, you're going to bully that poor devil. I almost feel pity for him."
"Almost?"
"The genius of devils was going to be a hack. Turning humans into devils? Metatron was created thousands of years before he was born." Dad snorted. "Devilnet? Stolen from humans. In truth, I don't care for his existence, but he would have done more to humanize the vast majority of devils into something tolerable than anyone else. Those Evil Pieces would have been the doom of Devil culture, eventually. Trojan horses in the guise of a chess piece."
"Man, I miss the internet. You're the only person who gets my memes."
"I'm glad you focused on the important details of My words, son."
"I try!" I floated around Her, just content to offer my presence for the moment as She worked. She must have visited The Beast just now to put more seals on the sleeping thing. I haven't seen it myself, but the fact that all my instincts screamed at me to flee just by sensing the wisps of it on Father's robe?
Yeah, fuck that thing.
"What is on your mind, Rachumel?"
"Well, your beautiful laugh, for one," I answered immediately, rolling mid-air to float on my side, like I wanted Elohim to draw me like one of Her Gaul girls. "But now that I have the time, have I ever told you how beautiful your hair is?"
"Yes. Every other day."
"Your sarcasm makes my heart flutter, just like that new robe revealing those beautifully long legs of yours makes my brain break." I grinned wider. "You didn't use to dress that way, Elo…"
"…I have been experimenting with new styles." Oh? Did Her movements get a little more stilted?
"It looks great on you. The only way that dress would look better if it was on my floor."
"Thank you, Rachumel, but I will have to decline. Do you have more to speak about?"
I inhaled deeply.
"That isn't commenting on my body?"
"Fine. Take all the fun out of my love for you." I briefly pouted frowned, before my face reset to neutrality. "I want to talk about the Angels again. Can't the restrictions be lifted a little more?"
"I've already made it so that their thoughts alone can never make them Fall. Anything else…" Dad sighed, and stopped typing. "There's a cost for their powers and strengths."
"Like a D&D paladin's oaths? Break it and you're fucked?"
"Not inaccurate. When I created the angels, I needed them for specific purposes. They were not entirely meant to become people like this. I did not have the benefit of how history would so clearly unfold. Clairvoyance can be disrupted by Free Will." Yeah, Dad got a huge dump of information from my brain when I offered up my memories to Her. She even got the information I forgot in my subconscious.
I hope She enjoyed all the porn, but She's never mentioned it.
"Was it because you weren't supposed to be this kind, yet?"
"I was and remain a jealous God, Rachumel. But seeing how far the lessons of Christianity took root was… heartening." Her fingers tapped on the side of Her keyboard. "That being said, I can see where my anger might have blinded me."
"So… you'll reduce the restrictions?"
"I make no promises."
"Oh c'mon! We're all practically humans with pigeon wings!"
"Dove wings, thank you."
"Oh, yeah, actually, dove fits better. Wait, don't distract me! That's my tactic!" I pointed my finger at Dad and successfully managed to not stare at the glorious sideboob Her straining robes presented me with. "Point is, I don't see why humans get to fuck up as much as they want but can get to rewalk the path, but Angels fuck up once and suddenly 'bye bye, you suck'! Can't it be like a three strike system? Let the wings slowly darken?"
"…Rachumel, why are you under the impression angels cannot redeem themselves?" Dad… sounded really worried.
"Uh… None of the Biblical canon I have ever seen has suggested or said otherwise."
Elohim turned to stare directly at me. "Rachumel. Angels have had the power to Ascend back to Heaven since the moment of their creation. Through sincere, honest atonement, regret, and by deed and virtue to reject their sin, they may rejoin My choir."
Wut.
We stared at each other. I was in a state of utter confusion, and I think Dad was in a state of growing horror. "Wait wait wait- They can?!"
"Yes!"
"Since- No, wait, you've answered that- But, we don't have a single story about that. Nothing that wasn't new fiction…"
I could almost visibly watch as Father almost tore apart the copy of memories I gave Her. She picked apart every word, every memory, every off-handed phrase. "…Not a single one?" She turned towards Her Book of Creation, summoning it to Her side. With a flash of LIGHT that blinded the fuck out of me, Elohim pulled upon Her Clairvoyance in a way that the rest of the pantheons were going to feel. I knew this, because I have seen the straining stars of the Holy Spirit in this Throne room race and dance across the ceiling before when She's attempted to scry the future.
I patiently moved to Her side, and waited.
And waited.
And waited.
Until my hands lashed out to catch Her as Father nearly collapsed into my arms. "…Not a single one… My children…" I didn't need to see her face to know Father was sobbing.
So I did what I my name tells me I was made to do. I lowered us gently to the floor, and let Elohim sob into my lap as I cradled Her head. "Let it out, Elo," I murmured, just high enough for Her to hear me. "I'm here. I'll always be here when you need me."
For one of the few times in this life, I was thankful for the control that my blue-balling had forced me to cultivate over my mana and body. I sheltered Her face with my wings and sent forth my energy in soothing pulses, and made sure my body only reacted the way I wanted to.
I held Her for hours on end. I let Her hear all the words of love I could offer. I let Her understand that I already forgave whatever She needed me to forgive.
It's what you sacrifice for family, after all. Like Quote ReplyReport Reactions:crofty666, Daoisttian3, Neo-Chan and 1,797 others- Rachumel, Angel in Pain
Training was fun! Dashing around with your wings in evasive maneuvers, testing the durability of your light-forged weapons, all sorts of angel specific tactics to make sure we don't die the moment we touch a battlefield.
Yeah, training was fun… when you're not getting the shit beaten out of you. But see, I made a critical mistake.
I made all my big Seraphim sisters all like me. Enjoy my company. Even hug me and admit they love being my big sisters!
But they also really really don't want to see me die. And you know what, I agreed with them! I, too, would like to avoid death again!
Unless it was DC's Death. Then I won't, for obvious reasons that involve the horizontal tango~!
Now, it wasn't like Michael or Helel or Raphael wanted to see me die either. But they're not, ah… as enthusiastic about it as Uriel.
Actually, none of my siblings were as enthusiastic about making sure I live as Uriel. None of my siblings generally dragged me to a training field and drilled me for hours on end. Every chance she got, no matter where I was in Heaven, or what I was doing, the moment Uriel got a break from guarding Eden, she found me, snatched me up, and flew to the closest training field. Then she beat me up until I couldn't stand. It was the closest thing I've come to see as Hell in my time in Heaven, especially because her preferred fighting style was absolutely anathema to my preferred fighting style.
Uriel, to this day, remains a close combat monster. Got in the thick of things with her Holy Fire and swung away with the Flaming Sword. I'm pretty sure she could have casually knocked over Lady Liberty if she got around to it and decided America didn't deserve her.
Me? My fighting style could be summed up as, "I really don't like pain."
I dodged, ducked, dived, dived, and dodged. I didn't just hurl spears of light, I chucked dozens of swords and knives like a discount flying kid Gilgamesh. I prioritized getting the heck out of dodge and played to my tiny body's strengths of speed and a small target, you know, like a smart person.
Then Uriel strode up and bitch-slapped my ass hard enough I didn't think a single horny thought for eight entire seconds. Damn, what a right hook. I failed trig and even I knew it was a mathematically perfect bitchslap.
Eight seconds, because Uriel's abs were fucking incredible. You could grind-
The impact of a right cross to my cheek interrupted me, as Uriel punched through my hasty defense once again. "Come on, little bro!" was her cheerful cry, a conjured lightsword bouncing on her shoulder. "There's no getting distracted in combat! Distraction is death!"
"So I have heard before! Several hundred times!" I replied, leaping backwards away from her casual swipe. Yeah, you heard me. Leapt. Because Uriel said proper footwork is important so now I'm touching the dirt again, like a peasant. "But you have literally over a 100 times the power I do!"
"That sounds like what you would call a 'Skill Issue', Rachumel!" Uriel laughed.
Dad dammit, past me, why did you teach her gamer lingo! I cursed mentally, dodging under a gently lobbed spear of light that still nearly took my head off because 'a light spar' for Uriel means 'LASO Halo Difficulty' for me. Oh right, 'cause the idea of Uriel slapping a Fallen Azazel in the future with a 'git gud' made me giggle like a loon.
So, it's been about a year since Dad banned me from trolling the Grigori, as apparently Azazel nearly popped a gasket when I left a note on his desk describing how it felt to massage Big Sis Gabby's boobies. Now see, I think I'm being unfairly punished! It was only a mild amount of tomfoolery. A little giggle between buddies!
But Dad didn't agree, and now I can barely say hi to Penemue and her fantastic rack before I'm chased out.
Rude.
Oh right, the fight. With a grunt, I dashed forward, throwing a dagger of light at Uriel's face that exploded in a flashbang just before she could deflect it. I rushed in, new spear in hand to strike.
"Wonderful, Rachumel! Most enemies will never anticipate such an attack!" Uriel said, just before her fist lashed out and crushed my ribs with a punch that nearly broke the sound barrier. "But do not get cocky! Higher-level fighters will have trained to fight without their eyes and ears!"
"That's bullshit," I wheezed, collapsing to my knees and fluttering my wings. "So much bullshit!" With a snarl of pain, I flared my two wings open, focusing on that innate connection to the Heavenly System to link my Light Magic to body. Spell circles full of Holy Symbols appeared, covering my entire wingspan. With a thought, I found that reclusive energy of Life that rested in my body, something I still couldn't perfectly wield despite the years of training. Once I had it, I connected it to my magic, and with body and soul aligned, I unleashed my assault.
Now, naming attacks was usually pretty cringe, but when one was in a universe with Shounen rules AND Hentai rules, you played to the physics of your situation. "Hurricane of the White Night!"
In less than a second, the thousands of fluffy feathers on my wings were taken by the spell, converted to energy, reshaped into spearheads, and fired all at one once like the world's holiest shotgun.
It did NOTHING to Uriel beyond shredding her clothes off her in the stupidly ecchi way one knew DxD worked on. "Well done, Rachumel! I haven't seen that attack before!" Uriel dismissed her sword, clapping her hands together as I slumped in place, breathing heavily. My wings were as naked as Uriel, reminding me way too much of uncooked chicken wings as I looked over them. Then I coughed blood from that heavy hit Uriel delivered, and realized looking like a pre-shot KFC commercial was the least of my concerns.
"Honestly, Uriel. You go too hard on him," a new, stilted voice spoke up, blissful healing light falling over me right after.
"Ah, he can take a pounding," Uriel said, brushing off the criticism. "I always make certain my favorite little brother never gets too wounded. Besides, at this rate, I bet we can get him to four wings in the next four decades!"
"I know Father told us he could reach a Seraphim's level, but there is no rush." The healing light fell away, and I looked up to see another of my Seraph sisters, Azrael. You know, the Angel of Death? Yeah, that one.
She was actually really chill and mothery, a kuudere if there was one. I thought she was just a gloomy bitch when we first met, but I'm so glad I was wrong. Honestly, she acted more like my mother than my sister, not that I minded the pampering!
The fact I would happily call her Mommy is only moderately relevant to the above. I gave a smile of thanks to Azrael, who returned it with a tiny one, before she focused back on her fellow Seraphim. For the moment, I tuned out their little spat, and just enjoyed the view.
Azrael was what any self-respecting man would call thiccc - yes, with three c's. She had pale grey skin like snow dusted with ash, and while her eyes had black sclera and white irises, it was her captivating soft blue hair and blue wings that drew attention to my sister. Tight black robes clung to and hid her form, but I had bathed with all my Seraphim sisters at this point; her breasts were perfectly proportioned to her plush frame, but all that did was make them look smaller than they actually were when compared to her phat thighs and massive ass. She was soft and jiggly in all the ways one could desire, her posterior particularly prominent. I haven't been able to get her to sit on my face, but I'm pretty sure my head would be a pancake, and may Father dropkick me to hell if I haven't tried to get Azrael in mom jeans.
Azrael had already mentioned to several others at this point that I was one of her favorite siblings. I think she adored me because I wasn't afraid of her Deathly aspects, and why would I? I've already died once, and it landed me in Heaven.
Checkmate, atheists.
In contrast, Uriel was almost as tall as Father, and muscled in a way that reminded me of the old "mildly muscular women think they're goddesses" meme. Light chocolate skin wrapped around those delightful toned thighs, bigger than my head, and enough to drive forward men's hopes and dreams. Her abs were magnificent, crafted through both Father's will and Uriel's own drive. Her breasts, a perfect handful on her towering frame, were huge compared to my Shota body. White hair, wild like a barbarian's, and bright yellow eyes rounded up the amazonian package, Uriel's bright white wings usually folded up into a single pair as opposed to the twelve she should have.
Did I mention that she usually stripped down to practically a thong and some cloth wraps around her breasts when we fought? And Uriel wondered why I couldn't pay attention. That ass of hers was tight enough I could bounce a nickel off it and the recoil would send it to orbit.
And yet, it has been telling of the 70ish years I've been an angel now that the sight of Uriel, naked, coated in a light sheen of sweat, and standing without a care in the world, did nothing to even slightly rouse the python between my legs.
I have been so perpetually blue-balled that I believe it is now my natural state of being. There are two orbs of cement dangling between my legs. They were bigger now then they were when I got my premium schlong, so they might actually be swollen with unspent pregnog, because fucking Hentai physics. I have churned from nutmilk to nutbutter. The first time I pop my top in a woman, it was going to be the Biblical Flood before it happened. I've hit the No Nut Neverending challenge by accident, because FUCKING. HENTAI. PHYSICS.
Do you understand me, possible psychosis? Seventy. Years. Of being surrounded by 10 out of 10s. Of perfect sizes and flawless builds. The cutest lolis, and the thiccest onee-sans. I have witnessed the vision that flat is justice, medium is premium, and big is truth.
And not a single moment of release. Not a single chance of relief that would not hurt myself or a sibling. I may just ascend to buddhahood on the back of my frustration, or the first time I hit post-nut clarity I will transcend my limits.
So yeah, it was starting to get a little unbearable. But even if it sucked all the dicks, I would endure. Like the bald man said, anything for family.
It was about when both Uriel and Azrael were chest to chest in their argument, and I was idly imagining their lips kissing around my cock that I decided I should probably speak up. "Azrael, it's alright. Uriel is just making sure I don't get skewered the first time I step into a real fight."
"That wing blast of his could probably cripple an 8-wing if it catches them off-guard," Uriel replied, beaming at me and throwing a thumbs-up. The thumbs-up made her breasts wobble, because hentai physics.
"It also means he can't fly- Rachumel, why are you flying?" Azrael's chastisement turns question as I float in the air with my naked wings. They feel frigid, I feel oddly exposed, and I'm trying really hard to not look at them because Father-damn do I miss fried chicken. I am aware I am a snacc, but not this way!
"We fly through magic. I have wings, ergo, I fly," I answer, putting my hands on my waist, and nodding at my wisdom.
"But… the feathers?"
"They're just there to look nice."
"But you used nearly all your magic in that last attack," Uriel commented, raising an eyebrow.
"Uriel. I do nothing but fly everywhere. Flying costs practically no magic to me." Honestly, it was gonna take an actual mana drain effect or crippling my wings to stop me from flying. Yes, having a crippled wing prevented flying, it's about the whole mental effect of angelic magic.
"To return to a previous point, brother," Azrael continued, seeming to give up on my naked wings and ability to still fly. "How did you come up with that last attack?"
"Oh that? You know how we angels are made of Light and Holy energies, and we manipulate it, too?" My sisters nodded their heads. "And you know how just being alive generates that extra energy, that Fighting Power?" Uriel nodded more knowingly than Azrael. "Well, I take my magic, I mix it with that Life energy I can't quite use yet, and steal from the magic that makes up my wings to convert the Life, Light, and Holy energy into that attack. I call it Hurricane of the White Night!" If only because no one was going to get 'Biden Blast.' "Uh, why are you two making that face?"
Uriel and Azrael were both… scared of me? Their faces were twisted in horror of some kind, at least? Which was more emotion than I usually get from her. "Brother," Azrael spoke up, her voice faint, "How many times have you done this?"
"Uh… at least thrice, just trying to make sure it worked. But all it did was make Uriel nude and put her amazing body front and center," I answered dutifully. "Why?"
At my words, Uriel startled before summoning a robe over herself. "Azrael, I will make sure he has not shared this with anyone. You take him before Father." Uriel vanished in a flash of light before I could say another word.
"Uh… Azrael? What-"
She loomed over me then, her black and white eyes staring down with a silent menace. "Rachumel~," She began, her tone high and sweet and saccharine in a way that detonated warning TNT across my spine, the former stoicness she always favored gone. "Do you know what that Fighting Power is~?"
"Uh… Life energy…?" I didn't watch DxD, okay?!
"Yes~!" Her voice didn't change, even as her wings flared out and surrounded me. "And can you summon Fighting Spirit at will~?"
"…Noooo?"
"Then, my cutest little Rachumel~!" Azrael's wings halted any kind of escape, as her mouth finally stretched wide in a grin that never reached her eyes, the white irises burning stars of wroth. "Why are you messing around with your precious little Lifeforce, Rachumel~!" Her hands pinned my wrists to my side as her face hovered over mine.
So that's why Angels say 'Be Not Afraid.'
It was going to take all of my brainpower to escape this certain death sentence (scolding by Dad). So, I buckled down, inhaled, accessed the ol' noggin-
"Mommy? Sorry, Mommy? Sorry, I mean, Mommy? Mommy? Sorry, Mommy? Sorry, I mean, Mommy? Mommy? Sorry, Mommy? Sorry, I mean, Mommy? Mom-"
Ah. I accessed the wrong part of the brain. Or my lower head.
Good news, all the voices in my head! My dick was still fully functional because I was now fighting off the boner that Azrael's angry mom energy gave me.
PoV - Elohim, Overburdened Dad
"Thank you, Azrael. I will inform him properly of his stupidity," I said, resting back on My Throne as she dropped the featherless body of My current most troublesome son. Once Azrael left, I let myself slump, dragging a hand through the glowing orb that shrouded my face. "Rachumel…"
"What? All that fanfic taught me was that getting beat up is how you got superpowers!" Rachumel complains, pushing up on his cute little tush before floating in the air with his, snrk, unfried chicken wings.
"The Fighting Spirit you speak of is obtained through strenuous exercise beyond your body's limits, over a period of time measured in decades, if not centuries for the supernatural." I patiently explained.
"But I do that all the time!"
"Groping your sisters is not strenuous exercise."
"...Are you sure?"
"Rachumel." This time, I gave him a pointed look to cease his tomfoolery. "The attack you created, while potent, is because it sacrifices your very lifeforce as fuel. If you could properly wield what the far future Japanese would call Touki-"
"Oh, that's what it is!"
"Then this attack would not be dangerous at all. However, you can't. You've been chipping away at your body's reservoir of Life with this attack, you weeb."
"That's probably pretty bad. Wait, did you just call me a fucking weeb-"
"Yes. It is, and yes, I did." With a wave of My hand, I used the System to correct the damage he's done to himself, including restoring his wings to a pristine state. "Do not use that magic unless the alternative is death, son."
"But, you can already bring back angels from death, can't you?"
"I can. Those angels who haven't messed with their settings." I gave him a pointed look. Did that little shit think I didn't know his plan?
I am YAHWEH. I did not plot and slaughter my own original pantheon to have the wool thrown over My eyes by My… admittedly adorable little human son, so attrac-. Ahem. I let him change himself because at this point, I don't honestly know how my System is handling him. And he stopped at himself, which I… appreciated. It would have been simple for him to mess with Gabriel's settings to prevent her from falling, and then seduce her.
But who knows what it would have changed in her. I am still unconvinced that Rachumel is completely unaffected by mangling his body's code.
"I have no idea what you're talking about."
"I'm sure." I rolled My eyes under the orb of light that covered My head. My golden wings fluttered for a moment before I reclined. "Do we have an understanding, son? Do not experiment with any more magic without one of your siblings."
"Yeah, I get it. Maybe Helel would be up for it?" His eyes didn't meet Mine as he spoke.
"...He would love to," I answered, voice softer than before.
Helel. My heir. My darling, resplendent son. The greatest of My children. The brightest of them. The shining example that they all aspired to.
That greatness damned… will damn him. The hubris. The vanity. The envy. The wroth.
Two years ago, I would have mourned the loss of My son to shadow and flame, the loss of his song amongst the Choir, and prepared My other children for the war and terror Helel would have sown throughout the world as Lucifer.
But now, My Morningstar is still among us, when Fate decreed he would have betrayed Me two years ago to this day. And I look upon the reason for why Destiny is late, the little anomaly that no doubt doesn't realize how much he throws Prophecy awry.
If Indra knew who was responsible for making his future sight useless… Rachumel would be dead. The Deva would have assaulted Heaven with their full might at Indra's command. A two-winged angel has no chance of surviving such a siege.
But I have digressed. Two years and a day ago, I brought the Heavenly Host in its entirety to bow before Adam and Eve, as the rightful inheritors of Earth, the home for humanity. Only two of my angels did not.
Helel refused to, his pride not letting himself be seen as weaker or lower than mere mortals.
Rachumel could not, as Eve was using him as a body pillow the entire ceremony.
I could have stopped it, but watching Rachumel whimper because Adam was all but daring him to comment on Eve's breasts against his face was far too funny to halt.
But the change was there. Helel witnessed that Rachumel did not as well, and thus, My eldest son did not feel as alone in his defiance. I elected to not inform him that Rachumel bowed to Adam and Eve later when he escaped Eve's clutches. Why would he not? His human soul recognizes his progenitors.
But the fact remains thus: Helel should have stormed my Throne Room to steal from My Book of Creation, and then Michael would have cast him down from Heaven at my order.
That he did not yet, does not mean he never will. Rachumel has halted THE SERPENT'S attempts to corrupt Eve numerous times, but he cannot guard her forever.
I cannot banish THE SERPENT - he is a fae kin to the damnable Dragon of Dreams, and thus the snake can slip in wherever a Paradise needs be a Nightmare.
But once the offence is committed… once I get my hands on that blasted reptile, slithering in MY GARDEN-
"Hey Dad," comes the voice that interrupts My spiralling thoughts.
"Yes, my son?"
"So, I mean, technically speaking, we're all a part of you?" I nodded. "And so, you shaped us with your Creation Authority using Fire, Holy Spirit, and your divine essence?" I nod again, a little slower this time. "So, in the sense of rules and ideas, we're technically little pieces of you, as opposed to your children?"
"One could read it that way, if one were charitable. Why?"
"Well, it just seems a loophole needs to be closed." I leaned back, suddenly terrified by his gleeful tone. "Since all of angels are technically still you, it shouldn't be against the rules for angels to fuck! We're all just little bits of you, so it's just advanced masturbation. Incesturbation? Dopplebanging, we'll go with dopplebanging."
"..." I don't know what I expected.
"I'm a genius, huh?"
"Rachumel, just… shut up. For five minutes. Shut up." I swear, I didn't know divinity could have aneurysms until this son came along.
Remarkably, he did. I took those blissful moments to compile some more code for my nascent Sacred Gear system, still millennia off from completion. Perhaps I can start with some angelic armaments?
Rachumel simply floated in the air before me. At that five minute mark - to the exact second - he finally spoke up once more. "Hey Dad."
"Rachumel. You've already gotten in trouble today. Can whatever this nonsense is wait until tomorrow?"
"No, because I'm kinda tired of watching you kill yourself from exhaustion."
"I am not-"
"Yes you are!" For the first time in My existence, I have witnessed Rachumel shout at Me in anger. "You're tearing yourself apart! In the entire time I've been in Heaven, I've never seen you take a break that I didn't annoy you into taking through shenanigans!" He flew upwards to meet Me eye to eye and glared. "You. Need. To. Rest."
I could feel My ire rising with his words. "You know naught of which you ask, son."
"Oh, I think I do!" He replied, not intimidated by My lowered tones. "The Beast, the Sacred Gears, making animals for the Garden, creating new angels, preparing for the Great War, continually evolving Heaven's system! Tell me, Dad, did I miss one?!" He took My breath of silence as permission to continue. "But you know what I don't see? You taking a damn nap! For fuck's sake, Elo, I know you don't masturbate because no one can in Heaven, but then I'm left wondering what the stress relief is!"
"When I spend time with My children, of course." I had been doing that more often, lately, since the… observation that none of My children had managed to Ascend. I was already implementing plans to seed the thoughts of how to return home to all My children, should they Fall. It… was the least I could do. But now, I was fighting down My wroth at how My son spoke to Me this way. "Do not presume to overstep your station-"
"My station?!" Rachumel's jaw dropped for a moment before he rallied. " Oh ho ho, we are way fucking past my station here. Father, I want you to look me in the eye and say that when you spend time with the other angels, you aren't working on something else."
The silence in the room was stifling. I looked at My Heavenly System.
"Look… Elohim." At My name on his lips, I turned back to see where he had floated closer. "I get it. You've got irons in the fire, and plans going awry. But you have to see you're running yourself ragged." His face creased with worry. "That's how you die, Elohim. You're so exhausted that Lucifer and his gang of losers jump you, and don't die instantly for sheer audacity."
The swelling anger I had been fighting vanished, a ghost in the wind.
"...I had made My peace with that, if it sealed The Beast," I answered, a mirthless chuckle on My lips. I slumped on My Throne.
"You left the world in the hands of Issei." He pointedly looked at Me. "I get it, Shounen Protagonist 'Victory', and I'm one of the last people to call out someone for perversion, but something just ain't right about that boy. And then there's probably the fact Issei was converted at a young age into an eldritch sleeper agent… If any of that nonsense is even true."
"He succeeds, no? Many things are forgiven in the face of victory."
"I'm sure that helped Gabby not cry herself to sleep every night with your death."
"You can't possibly know that."
"It's what I'd do, Elo," he whispered, and the cracking in his voice stopped My next rebuttal cold. "And I don't love you as a parent nearly as much as the Seraphim, or my other siblings. They'll break with your death, even if they don't know it."
"…" Even still, I can't just… rest like My son wants. There's too much that needs to be done. I can rest when I-
"Alright then. Drastic measures."
-finish My works- Drastic measures?
I had almost a full moment to stop Rachumel, a lifetime of action for those of My strength, but I was still surprised when his lips landed on Mine.
Soft. His lips were even softer than Mine, and it would seem that seven decades of neglect had not diminished the skills he practiced in his last life. He was patient and kind, working with my surprise to draw out My gasp of pleasure. His hands cupped My cheeks, turning us both to deepen the liplock for just a single second, wet and warm. My eyes fluttered. Not once did I feel his tongue, and as he pulled away, a small string of saliva between us snapped. "What…?"
"Sorry for stealing that First Kiss. Figured the flirts and the speeches weren't doing it, Elo, so wanted to be clear." His blue eyes met mine through the illusion. "I love you, Elohim. I have since the first year we met. And this is an intervention. You are going to stay here, we are going to trade sloppy kisses until that tension is gone. And you can stop this at any time by saying, 'I'm taking a break', got it?"
"Rachumel, I cannot just-"
The brat kissed Me again, a light peck that interrupted My words.
"There's so much to be done-"
Again, his soft hands turned My head so his lips could cover mine, this time lingering longer than a few seconds before ending it. "If you want this to stop, you can. Any time now."
"I am your Fath-"
I couldn't even finish the sentence before Rachumel aggressively conquered My lips this time. My pulse spiked, and I knew intimately that My son's did as well.
"This is ridic-"
The cut-off there was intentional, I know My child. But one of My hands rose up to dig into his hair, fluffy and smoother than silk itself. Weavers would sell their children to work with strands of his beautiful red locks.
"I-"
Again, and again, and again, Rachumel kissed Me. He didn't bother to let Me speak sentences anymore. If before the kisses were smooth and loving, the press of lips to another, now they were… sloppy. And I cannot even blame the brat for it, because…
My tongue was the first to slip out and brush against his lips for entrance. Now, we devoured each other, our skin flushed as My son hungrily took all I offered. For the first time in ages, I felt My nipples harden into spikes of pleasure beneath my robes, certainly visible through the fabric. Everything about him was paradoxically soft but firm, yielding flesh over an unyielding spirit. We finally broke the kiss, My gaze focused on him, his eyes lidded and dilated as he stared at Me…
And I froze at the touch of his hand to My shoulder, a silent question asked.
It was… a difficult topic to speak of. And not simply because my foolish son wished to… lay with me.
Gender didn't mean much of anything to me - I was GOD. I had been beyond the idea of gender the moment I coalesced, and the destruction of the Canaanite pantheon that led to the ascension I wield now made it even more so.
Then, the day Rachumel was made… he flirted with Me.
Crassly.
In that moment, I flashed between indignancy and appreciation. The idea of any creation of Mine would so boldly say such things… I have always had a bad temper.
But… they were not unappreciated, oddly.
And then the flirting continued. Crassly, as usual, but sometimes sweet. Sometimes even more vulgar. It was… not an unwelcome feeling, to be desired by My mostly dutiful son. I had been courted before by members of my former pantheon. I refused them all.
Rachumel… It helped that he was originally human, I suppose. I have always had a soft spot for those mortals. But Rachumel did not care one whit I was his supposed Creator and Father. He still does not, considering his appreciative gaze runs over My body once again. And we had shared moment I know I never could have with My other children.
He was courting me. And I… I do not have an answer for him. "We… would be improper. This was already too far."
"Oh yeah, huh? In what way? You don't care about incest, I don't care about incest, magic certainly doesn't."
Curses. I was going to lead with that. "Our power difference is too great."
"Please. You could break me at any time." He rolled his eyes "Besides you're a virgin, I'm the one who has actually been married and had kids before. The best you're gonna manage is Power Bottom." He had a stupid smug smirk on his face now, one I wanted to kis- wipe away. "I'll get to Seraph level at some point anyway. Beyond that, with enough grit."
"What would your siblings say?"
"They'd be happy that you're happy."
"Age differences-"
"My melted-together-soul-time is like in my 100s. I ain't a baby."
"...I'm too busy to… dally," I looked away, struggling to find other ideas.
"You need this. You know you do, somewhere inside you, or you would have pushed me away and smote me for my audacity." Rachumel's gaze bore into me. "Nothing in this Throne room happened that you didn't allow to happen. Your body certainly didn't object. Your nipples look like they're trying to destroy your robe."
"...And how would this courtship help with that?" I crossed My arms under My… quite honestly massive breasts. I didn't even realize how many 'Hentai Tropes' I was exuding until My son shared them. "A dalliance-"
"It will relax you. Make you take time for yourself." Rachumel threw his hands above his head. "I'm not saying 'Bend over your Throne, I'm gonna breed you' now." I ignored the flash of heat in my core as he continued. "That's for when you realize I'm the best thing that could happen to you." Once again, his smirk returned. "Even you can't control all the variables. The Future is always in flux. Especially with my existence or whatever that metaphysical Destiny nonsense is."
"Of course you brush that off." I chuckled, before reaching out My hand and taking his own. "...Even still… I'm… not ready. For full courtship."
"We've got the time. Right now, I just want you to relax." Rachumel's smile was full and bright, like butter wouldn't melt in his mouth. He was beautiful. "And when we get to that point, we can go as slow as you want. What's a thousand years to the ageless, eh? Still gives me time to figure out how to seduce Gabby, anyway."
"You are not seducing your sisters like some dishonorable cad, Rachumel," I let go of his hand to thrust My finger at him. "Woo them properly, as they gain more life experience."
"And I'm sure it's just a coincidence they got more enthusiastic about bathtime with me once that Sex Ed update happened." Rachume's flat gaze bored into Me, a drill of exasperation.
"You are the one who got them used to such times. My… gentle encouragement just made sure you would enjoy it," I answered, a smirk on my lips. I crossed one robed leg over the other, my hands resting on the arms of my Throne. "Be careful what one wishes for, no? The nerve of you, thinking you can court Me and all my daughters at once. A little blueballing-"
"A LITTLE?!" Rachumel exploded in indignant, adorable outrage. "There is nothing little about my balls, especially your cockblocking, you fucking voyeur!"
"Voyeur? Such a crude accusation." …Not an entirely inaccurate one. "Perchance you should have considered that before attempting to court so many of your naive and innocent sisters, no? I'm sure you took that into account before all this began."
"Elohim," Rachumel said, and I did my best to ignore the shiver of pleasure up my spine at his pleading, "Kalawarner and Raynare spent half an hour yesterday making certain every inch of my cock was clean with their hands. Gabriel used her breasts to wash my back a week ago. Uriel manhandled me in the bath two weeks back, and I think she's discovered her kink is scentplay because I felt her nose touch my balls." He took a long, deep breath. "I think I'm reaching my limit. I am begging you to lower the restrictions on angel fucking."
"I will consider it. All the more reason for you to discover how to properly woo and bed them, no?" I closed my eyes and let my laugh fill the room. As it tapered off, however, I didn't hear the expected rebuttal. I did hear a shifting of cloth, and my eyes opened to Rachumel shrugging off the top of his robe. "...What are you doing?"
"Elo," Rachumel said, and the pleading was gone now. His upper chest, toned in training, was bared to my gaze. "There are quite literally only two people in all of Heaven right now I can fuck. One is Eve, and that's not happening outside of a threesome because NTR is a shit fetish when the relationship is a happy one." His hands moved to rest on his waist, gripping the cloth. "The other… is You."
I stilled, utterly and completely, My gaze locked on his groin. At My lingering refusal to speak, Rachumel continued, his voice controlled and focused. "I can't masturbate. I've got a seventy year long dry streak that's damn near killing me. It's my fault entirely, yeah. Should have really considered what asking for a Hentai cock in the Ecchi-Shounen titty universe was going to do." I was mildly offended at hearing the universe described… bitterly accurately, I admitted. "So right now, Elo? You're the only one I got left I can ask to help.
"So I'm going to lay it out there, heh. Cards on the table. You don't want any of this, you speak up, and I'm turning right around and leaving." I could tell Rachumel honestly would. Consent was amongst his highest priorities, even now. "Say no at any time. Clearly and honestly, and it ends. Say you don't want this in a way that isn't some kind of excuse, and I'm gone."
"I…" I suppose part of this is… My fault. The petty parts of Me that were jealous, for I was a Jealous God, inflicted some of his… testicular constipation. And It's not as if I haven't… seen that massive phallus… that I already knew everything about because… I had… created… that penis. I knew every thick vein. I knew exactly how girthy it was. How satin soft the skin was. How long it would be. After all, I had crafted it for-
"I have been cockblocked and blueballed for seventy years, Elo." His voice still sounded out from in front of Me. "Behold, the fruits of your labor." Without My open refusal, his robe dropped to the floor.
…It was as magnificent as phallus as I remembered. Even flaccid now, it held itself proudly. Lengthy, enough to overfill even the largest of women, even satisfy a giant or jotun. Enough to fill Me utterly. Girthy, not even My hand would wrap around it. As if it was a sword designed to pry open any sheath that it met and make it fit, capped with a thick, womb-sieging head. Enough to mold Me around him. Thick, pulsing veins branched through it, and I could already see in My mind's eye as his full erection as it throbbed to the tune of Rachumel's heartbeat. Would our hearts beat in sync when he took Me? And his testicles-
His balls were bigger than I remembered making. Perhaps all that teasing was not the best for Rachumel as he… is… a growing… boy.
Oh fuck me, he was going to get bigger. I have made a critical mistake in letting My errant thoughts consume Me when Rachumel first made his request. Why did I design a phallus meant for me?! The shameful longing I felt the week after I crafted it… I have told myself it was one mistake, and it wouldn't happen again. I was above such base emotions as lust.
And yet, the whole scene was incongruous, because such a large penis on a young tween body simply made the dick look all the larger. I tore my eyes from his groin to meet Rachumel's knowing gaze. The air between us felt charged with lightning. "Well?" He asked, floating in place. "Am I leaving?"
"...One time. Just this once. With My hands. And we will never speak of this again." I sighed at Rachumel's rapid nodding. Committed now, with the safety of knowing Rachumel would stop if… if I asked, My palms reached out and settled on his cock.
It was… warm. It twitched in my grip, and I heard Rachumel suck in a breath as My fingers traced the veins. I pumped the phallus slowly, and marvelled at My own craftsmanship as it rose in tumescence. I carefully watched My son's reactions, noting what he disliked and enjoyed. My left hand continued to drag fingers up and down his manhood, but My right hand rested at his crown, slowly circling the tip.
A drop of pre-cum dewed My fingers, and before I could do more than start to rub it into his fat cock, more appeared. Soon, My pace was spent in scooping up his fluids slather over his erection, and his phallus only continued to grow. "You truly were backed up, I see," I murmured, stealing the phrases he would understand from the copy of his memories that he offered Me. Perhaps he will appreciate familiar words?
"I'm just surprised it's coming out," Rachumel joked, his face flushing red as he hovered in place. He shivered and twitched in My grasp, and there was a part of Me… enjoying this. Having Rachumel as putty in My palms… more so than usual. "I was worried the plumbing might not work since I never used it!"
"Mmm." My hands continued their journey, stroking his massive cock. I luxuriated in how soft the skin of his dick was, the steel erection beneath refusing to yield even to Me. I paused once Rachumel moaned, and realized for the moment he was no longer getting larger. "You're so thick and hard… all for Me?" As My son shuddered under My touch, closing his eyes and savoring the pleasure, I moved a hand away for a moment and surreptitiously measured My forearm against his cock…
My forearm lost. In length and girth.
Something deep in My core burned at that knowledge, and before Rachumel noticed what I did, I moved My hand away. My pre-cum coated hand cupped his sac. His breath hitched in his throat, and that's when I let My smile go wide, not that he could see. "Oh? Someone likes when I stroke his fat balls?"
"Elo…!" Rachumel's plaintive whine filled the air, but not because of pain. But because I found his weak spot~!
"Aw, someone overestimated their prowess~" I let a throaty chuckle escape as Rachumel's thick, veiny cock twitched at the sound of My voice. "So heavy, these little semen factories of yours… you haven't done a very good job of releasing tension, have you? Fufufu~!" I stroked his trembling dick, the squelch of My soaked hand along his skin filling the air just as prominently as My purring laughter. "All that talk about making me squeal and moan throughout the years, and now you're trembling under My touch, little Rachumel. I suppose it doesn't matter how massive your fat cock is, when I control it…"
Every little gasp from him went right to My core. I languidly pumped My son's fat meatpole, ever careful to not squeeze too hard. He was celestial steel beneath My touch, and I smiled at how he was trapped under My grip. This… bitchbreaker of a penis, this ruination of women, it could do nothing but tremble under My tender ministrations. "Maybe I should put a ring over this?" I said, idly imagining a thick golden ring at the base of his manhood - not a painful tool, but a claim. "Since you've so sweetly surrendered yourself to Me, it seems only fair that I claim the part of you you're so proud of. My darling little Rachumel, wouldn't you like that? To have a little piece of My ownership to this thick, drooling cuntbreaker?"
I delighted in the groan of pleasure he took from my words, and rewarded him with a gentle caress of his overfull sac.
"So that's… how you wanna play it, huh?" There was steel in My son's voice that stopped Me, and I looked up from his groin to meet his focused gaze. "Two can talk dirty, Elo!" With a flap of his wings that surprised Me, Rachumel pushed forward, and My hands instinctively tightened on his shaft and sac. Within a moment, the dynamic had changed - I was not simply stroking him as he flew in front of Me.
Now his massive cock covered My face, the weighty manhood blocking half My vision as it stretched over the top of My head to brush against My halo. A single breath filled my nose with him, Rachumel, My son; his thick, heady scent was impossibly strong to this body's senses. "What-"
"Think you can just steal my former life's wife's dirty talk and make it your own, huh?" His hand took hold of My halo, and I froze completely. "Let me teach you how to talk dirty, Elo~" He drew back his hips, dragging his fat, wet cock along My face. The illusion kept together, but it did nothing to impede his cock. "I'm going to take my time with you. You crafted me a fat fucking cock, and you're gonna experience every fucking inch." Rachumel thrust forward then, the bulbous crown of his phallus poking My halo. My entire body shivered at the bare touch of dick to the golden ring above Me. My hands still held his shaft and sac, just as frozen as I as he used My face to masturbate.
Rachumel's pace was slow and methodical, grinding the ventral part of his manhood up and down My face, slicking it in his fluids and swamping My nose with his scent, fresh from My healing and cleansing of him. "I just asked for a big cock, Elo~! Not a monster made to break women. Can't beat the cock, after all!" I gulped. It was made for Me. "So, go ahead and kiss it, Elo. Kiss your son's fat, throbbing cock." He drew back until his crown rested in front of Me.
I closed my eyes, and shuddered, and pressed my lips to Rachumel's penis. My eyes opened to see Rachumel groan in pleasure at My… submission. "Now, I know you didn't mean to mock my beleaguered balls… so kiss and say sorry to these fat nuts, Elo." He thrust up until My nose was buried in the sac that held his enormous testicles. "After all… they're gonna knock you up with triplets some day~!"
…He would, given a single chance. I am a deity of Life, after all, and some of that seeped into Rachumel's groin when I… crafted it for him. Humans were already virile by the standards of all the supernatural, and I realized the synergy between My son's soul and his new implement of reproduction too late. I doubt Rachumel realizes that most of humanity, let alone the supernatural, can't match his virility.
I expect a great deal of Heaven will be made up of Miracle Children someday.
And now, in this crafted body I used to work in Heaven, I feel the heat pool in My core and drip down to wet My lower lips at his words. It cannot be helped, the damned brat is appealing directly to my Authority of Creation. I can, now quite literally, smell how productive his… his balls are. I can nearly taste his climax, I can feel My focus narrowing on those hefty orbs, and instead of a kiss, my body responded with attempting to lick and suck at his testicles. I even futilely try to fit one between My lips, but I fail… a fact Rachumel doesn't miss.
"That's it… worship my sac. Praise the balls that are gonna breed you." The hand not holding My halo takes a hold of My wrist, My son swift to correct the stroking of My hand. "I knew you'd like that thought. Me, pinning you down on a fluffy bed, knees beside your head as I fuck you full of cum." I can almost pluck the image he's painting from his head. "You wanted to put a ring on this? Then I should put my mark on you. I even know where." The hand on My halo squeezed for just a second, before he whispered, "I'm gonna put a nice, shiny, and red tattoo. Right over your womb. Because that's what I'm gonna claim from you someday, Elo."
My pussy clenches, empty and desperately wishing not to be.
"My little pregnant God-wife, right next to all my sisters. I'll take you again and again, going balls deep, so your tight pussy can drink up every. Single. Drop, of my baby batter. Drive up right to that wall with my crown and all but demand entrance. Pin you to your bed for a fucking year straight, and let my swimmers bloat your womb with my kids!"
For just a moment… I let the daydream take Me.
He's too big, but I still take him. My knees are beside My head, My own hands pinning My legs to My sides. His small hands grip into My full thighs, and his cock molds My cunt around him. Twelve wings flare out behind him, his auburn hair slick with sweat. Rachumel, my son, is all grown up. To the sides, My daughters, from Seraphim to simple two-winged angels, contentedly pat pregnant bellies full of children, smiling and delighted as their Fa-Mother finally joins them.
My eyes focus back on the deep ocean blue gaze staring at Me, and Rachumel sheathes his fat, thick cock inside me, right up against My cervix. My stomach, branded red with a heart and wings, is already bulging from his size alone. My son pins me beneath him, groaning my name with his climax. My abdomen swells with his sun hot seed, trillions of his little swimmers racing to find my eagerly awaiting eggs. I howl in a climax that shakes reality as new life explodes into existence inside Me.
And all I do is beg for more.
"So heavy… so full…" I breathed out, and nuzzled My face against his sac once I pulled away from the idle daydream. This is too dangerous. It needs to end now. Though I could feel the reluctance in My body to acquiesce, I still broke Rachumel's grip and gently pushed him back and away. "You wanna come, don't you, Rachumel? Empty your balls all over me?" My left hand moved to rapidly pump his shaft, Rachumel groaning in need as he got closer to his own finish. I used my right hand, however, to snap My fingers, and the clasps holding my robes dropped to My waist, exposing My enormous, bountiful breasts. As expected, Rachumel zeroed in on the sight. "Right here. You can cum right here, my son. Cover me, Rachumel."
"Fuck, Elo… that's just not faaaaaaiiiiiiir…" I watched him visibly fight his finish, to simply try and keep this going longer to enjoy the pleasure. I couldn't have that.
"Don't you want to cum, son?" As one hand continued to simply stroke him, I used my other hand to angle his shaft to drag his cock's crown over my hardened nipples, shivering at the stimulation. "Don't you want to blow all your thick, sticky seed right over me? Do it, Rachumel." I released the hold I had on the spongey, fist-sized helmet of his cock to caress his balls once more, the heavy orbs pulling tight to his groin. "Come for Mommy."
Rachumel finally lost the struggle with a whimper that unraveled into a heady roar. "Mom!"
The sounds of My son's pleasure filled my throne room, and I shuddered at the primal noise that escaped from him. His climax began with thick ropes of semen splashed over My chest…
And kept going. Splash after splash coated My breasts, dripping down over My rigid, plump nipples to ruin My robe. Then Rachumel angled his manhood and coated My face, even if he couldn't see it, and as if that wasn't enough, the thick, syrupy fluid landed on My tongue…
And it was the best thing I had ever tasted. My own orgasm shamefully tore through Me, though I knew it was only a fraction of what I would feel if I ever let Rachumel actually bed Me.
Finally, Rachumel's climax tapered off, My head, torso, breasts, and chest coated in his ridiculous finish. He fluttered bonelessly to the floor, falling like he was made of paper, breathing as if he had just finished training with Uriel…
…His shaft had not flagged. Not for a second. Oh no.
And there were white wisps of energy around him? Was that… Later. His voice pulled my attention from his still erect cock.
"That," Rachumel managed to say, his voice strained and winded, "was the best nut I've ever had in two lifetimes. What the fuck." He turned his head to gaze at me, and his eyes traced up from where my legs were crossed tight enough to crush mountains. "Holy fuck, if I used a blacklight on you, you'd look like a Jackson Polluck painting. This is definitely a Hentai world."
"How romantic."
"Blame the Hentai Balls™. You look like a Taimanin just got through a round of bukkake with demon orcs. Or the aftermath of a Kuroinu gangbang. Like Chainsaw Man translated to a Chinese audience. I think I just put horses to shame."
"Are you quite done?"
"…Well, my mouth is." Rachumel looked down at his manhood in stupidification. "Did you add the ecchi and hentai stamina benefit or something? It doesn't even feel sensitive."
"No. Don't even try to push your luck."
"More proof we're in a hentai world." He looked up at me. "Do you feel less stressed?"
"…Yes." Surprisingly, that small orgasm… helped. My mind felt less burdened.
"Good. Then that alone makes it worth it." Rachumel rested his head back on the ground, before sighing and speaking up. "…You realize this is gonna change-"
"Nothing. It changes nothing." I refreshed the illusion around my head, just in case. "I will… clean myself up. You will go and attend your duties. Are we clear?" I needed someplace to decompress, away from the burning need between my legs. "We will… revisit my stress problems another day."
"But that- I-" I hid my wince as Rachumel slumped. "Yeah. Okay. I'll just… go get washed up once I go soft. Sorry… Mom." …Mom. Thankfully, we did not have to awkwardly wait for long, as once Rachumel's body realized no further coitus was coming, it rapidly retreated to its flaccid state. I hesitated, before with a gesture of magic, lifted him up. He blinked, unsure, his mouth open in a question before I shushed him.
With a flick of My hand, a thick, gold band encircled the base of his cock, the metal etched with a small dove atop it. I gave it a small enchantment to reduce the… well, pain of lack of release.
Before he could say another word, I used my System and kicked My consort from the Seventh Heaven straight to a secluded pool in Eden.
…With a trembling hand, My index finger scooped up the thickest strand of wet cum from My completedly coated breasts, and I closed my lips around it. I shuddered at the heady, almost vanilla-like taste.
No. This definitely cannot happen again… not until Rachumel is much stronger.
Too many would kill him if they knew I adored him enough to make him My consort. This was already a mistake in indulging his advances too soon. A snap of My fingers cleaned My body and reset My robes, and I vanished for more Seal work on Trihexia.
"…Rachumel, please don't be mad," I whisper to no one but Myself at the End of Time.
PoV - Rachumel, He Who Came Upon the Peaks of Heaven
"Holy shit, She's a tsundere." I chuckle like a moron at my words, and just float naked in the pond Elohim dropped me off on. My hands absent-mindedly raked over my body, clearing away the sexual fluids of my last workout.
My mind was so clear. For the first time in years, I didn't constantly recognize how every single angel was a total smokeshow. I'm sure if I had actually been fucking Elohim raw in a mating press, I would have genuinely ascended in some Buddha shit way. It was nirvana to finally empty my balls, if only for a fleeting moment.
But… now I had more to worry about. Elohim won't want to admit it, but our relationship has changed. It can't be just Fa- Mother and Son anymore, because we both have just taken the first steps to the sexual and romantic side. Seventy years of wearing Her down to accept a break, and even if it was only a fifteen minute handy, that's still more time than She's ever really taken before. I'm on the right track with Mom, I can feel it.
Fuck, She's Mom now. I just can't say otherwise.
…I really, really wanna mating press my Mom.
As I continued washing, I carefully inspected the gold band now around my cock. It doesn't feel restricting in any way. If anything, it's kinda… soothing? Definitely not a normal cockring. I ain't into denial play, but I would make an exception if one of my lovers were really into it.
I guess Mom placed her claim on me, huh? New teasing material, getto!
Also, the fuck are these white wisps? They kinda feel similar to my Life-
I paused. Then, without a further thought, I dove into where my repository of Life magic was and called upon it.
White mist exploded out of me as I floated naked in the pool.
…Did I just unlock Touki through ending a seventy-year dry streak by nutting over God?
…I will freak the fuck out about this later.
Now, I need to throw on some clothes and leave this pool before anyone-
"Oh, Rachy! There you are! I was hoping we could play another song together!" Gabriel swooped down from above to fly above me. "Oh, are you taking a bath? Let me join!"
"Wait, Gabby-!"
Gabriel didn't listen. She shucked off her robe without a care in the world, once again exposing her perfect naked body to me. Beautiful breasts the size of her head, and childbearing hips to make a man read the Holy Thighble graced me once more.
To a me that just got done releasing a seven decade build-up of pregnog over our Creator.
To a me that was completely not ready to handle more sexy shenanigans.
Naturally, the only possible response could happen. "Wow, Rachy! Your penis got a lot bigger all of a sudden! Are you thinking naughty thoughts? You shouldn't! Oh, wait until I tell Daddy!"
…Karma, why have you forsaken me so? Why must I be blueballed again so soon?!Last edited: Oct 25, 2025 Like Quote ReplyReport Reactions:crofty666, Daoisttian3, Hadrian810 and 1,593