"Tell me, holding such a great advantage, how did you make such a mess out of it?"
Su Ming pushed away the living corpse and shoved a cigarette into his mouth, asking helplessly. His little cousin was always prone to trouble, something he was long prepared for.
Deathstroke's task completion rate was one hundred percent, whereas Deadpool's was only about sixty to seventy percent.
Wade is a very laid-back person. Sometimes, halfway through a task, if he feels he's doing something wrong, he might even turn against and kill the employer, then take the money.
As for the standards of right and wrong, of course, they're based on his personal preferences. If the target happens to really get along with him, he would abandon the mission at any time.
This is also why despite his strong abilities, his business is average. Who with any choice would hire a mercenary who could abandon the mission at any time?
Mercenary and assassin businesses are quite competitive, especially in the information age he's in; the success rate is displayed on international mercenary websites, and the customer reviews below are all negative, greatly affecting his business.
However, Wade often engages in promotional activities, such as half-price commissions, buy one kill and get the family, art photography of corpses, etc.
He even issued discount coupons in newspapers and magazines, allowing housewives who enjoy collecting coupons to gather ten of them and receive top-level mercenary services for free...
Unfortunately, most of the people these housewives want to kill are their husbands, and Deadpool's prepared "murder and arson", "extermination", and other profitable value-added services simply don't come into play.
The coupon fiasco led to a considerable loss for Deadpool, and in tough times for survival, he took up tasks like finding cats and dogs, helping to mow the lawn, etc...
At this moment, Deadpool is using the power of the Gemstone to reposition his facial features, looking like he's dragging different icons on a computer desktop.
He held onto his mouth, dragging it back from his forehead to his chin, but the mouth seemed to have its own life and fought back, wanting to sing loudly.
Deadpool, enraged, directly tore the mouth from his face and stomped it fiercely on the ground.
Indeed, his face was without a mouth, just like in a cartoon; without lips, there really was no mouth, unlike typically showing a hole.
He extended a finger, and with the eye on his chin, sternly looked at the mouth on the ground, performing a pantomime telling it who the boss was.
Then, he rather cockily picked up the mouth, dusted off the dirt, and put it back on his face.
With the mouth serving as an example, the other facial features obediently returned to their rightful places.
"Slade, check if my eye spacing is correct? Am I still the handsome guy I was? And did I put my nose crooked?"
Su Ming glanced at Wade's lips, red and swollen like sausages, paired with rotting avocado and fiery red lips, a truly toxic combination.
He turned his head, taking a deep breath as he looked at the World Tree: "It's fine, nothing is amiss, quickly put on your mask and tell me why things got so messy, and where Loki ran off to?"
Mentioning this, Wade showed a sorrowful expression, slowly walking to the piano, touching each key.
"That's a long story, starting from when Loki and I switched the battlefield to the timeline... about one million years ago..."
"Then cut it short..."
Su Ming interrupted him irritably, they needed to know where Loki went and how he suppressed the Story Gem, not listen to Wade's human origin tale.
Wade's prepared speech was stifled, his red sausage-like mouth twitched and glistened.
He sighed; such a thrilling, touching experience, yet his cousin didn't want to hear it? Disappointed, he pulled down his mask, covering his face:
"Well, this really loses audience appeal, maybe the viewers want to know? Loki and I once buried a planet deep in excavation thousands of years ago..."
"No, they don't want to know, it's a non-existent story, either made up by you or him." Su Ming refused.
Wade touched his chin, pondering: "So, I fell into a temporary script, too deep into character? But I always thought immersing oneself was a basic skill for actors, though my handsome face meets the standards of youth idols, I've always focused on cultivating my acting skills, studying scripts for twenty-seven hours a day, continuing dance practice even with a fever of fifty degrees..."
"Phew..."
"Why does your Symbiote slip hands too?"
"Isn't Symbiote supposed to be slippery?"
"Such good reasoning... I also want a Symbiote."
"You'll have plenty in the future, Symbiotes of five different colors; you'll turn into a Voltron-like robot joined together by a five-color team. Now answer my question."
A sharp black Spike is slowly retracting from Wade's chest, flowing back into Su Ming's chest.
Strangulation just ate some of Hel's black Spiral Spikes; it can't mimic this energy creation, but mimicking the appearance is quite fun.
Wade touched his chest, where his uniform had a large hole. He regretted changing out of the Loki-style robe as soon as he could because now his clothes were torn again.
He scratched his head: "So let me put it simply, during my long battle with Loki, no matter what attack I used, he always had a way to counter it. We were evenly matched for a long time, so I thought of going back in time to deal with a younger him. Then he came along too, and we were still stuck, it was such a long time..."
Su Ming rubbed his face: "So you two developed feelings, realized you couldn't take each other down, and ended up admiring each other, becoming good friends without realizing it?"
Wade sat down in despair, lying on the piano as if sobbing, and the piano let out a heavy tone.
"Yeah, when I took off my pants and wanted him to leave a cute mark on my butt...he betrayed me...boohoo."
"Honestly, Friendship Magic doesn't seem to work well in our world. Besides, if you want a cute mark, you should try turning yourself into a horse first."
Wade suddenly got up from the piano, the area around his eyes on his mask appearing wet and dark: "No need. After going through this, I've grown up, and I've understood some things."
"Oh? Understood that Loki is not trustworthy?"
"No, I understood that before you can take, you must give. I want to strip Loki's pants and leave something in his chrysanthemum, then we would be good friends, right."
Wade slapped his palm with a plan in his mind, a frightening, DC Universe-level dark revenge plan.
"PG, PG-13, R, R-18, NC-17..."
Su Ming suddenly started reciting the movie rating system, and Wade instantly deflated; his plan was now unusable.
"Damn Loki, is this part of his plan too?"
"I can probably guess what you're thinking. Sometimes I also want to plant C4 in Loki's chrysanthemum and watch him shoot up, but you've probably left your explosives in the taxi, right? Let's not talk about that. Where did he go?" Su Ming casually played a few notes on the piano, as he was actually quite good at it.
"I didn't see, my eyes were on my chin before, remember? I could only see the keys and my Big Dick, couldn't even see the sheet music."
Deadpool spread his hands helplessly; it couldn't be helped, it was just that big, that attention-grabbing.
Su Ming thought for a moment, walked over, and put the piano in his bag, a green piano was quite rare and shouldn't be missed. Then he gestured for the others to follow him out from under the shadow of the World Tree, looking up at the sky.
"Heimdall! Take us back!"
The Rainbow Bridge descended almost without delay, transporting everyone directly back to Asgard.
At the observatory at the end of the Rainbow Bridge, not only was the Immortal Palace Lion Heimdall there, but even Odin was present. He was looking expressionlessly at the newly arrived bunch, holding the long Gungnir, not sure what he was contemplating.
"You've met my daughter."
This Odin was nothing like the sleeping one from before; from his aura, he was worlds apart.
If the Odin seen during Odin's Sleep felt like a tiger or some other beast, the one before them now felt like facing a god, no better way to describe it.
But Su Ming wasn't nervous; gods, he had seen plenty. Besides, he had seen through that Odin and The Ancient One were accomplices.
"Yes, Hel was quite enthusiastic, but Loki ran away, which is very strange."
"Oh?" Odin first nodded and then smiled: "Why is it strange?"
"All his actions have been to lure me to find him, even left many subtle clues, like a prank guiding my investigation direction, so when I was about to meet him, he ran away. Isn't that strange? Or does he have the shy heart of a young girl, too embarrassed to meet me when it comes time?"
Su Ming spoke earnestly, but whether it was Ciri and the others or Heimdall, they all showed strange expressions.
Shy? What does that mean?
Whereas Deadpool was looking around, touching here and there, even trying to bite the wall to see if it was solid gold, only to lick the dust.
Hearing Su Ming's words, he nodded approvingly; yes, Loki is just that embarrassing. Master Deadpool not only saw through his essence but could also describe him with a Japanese exclusive term, isn't that impressive?
He immediately started spouting trash talk to the nonexistent audience, generally showcasing his insight and language skills.
In fact, he could only speak English, but he could communicate with all the intelligent beings in the universe in English. After all, the other party could understand his meaning, and readers seeing him converse in English with various aliens wouldn't find it odd.
Because the storyline is very continuous, everything falls into place.
He could even talk to cockroaches or bugs and even trash cans, although whether it's an unknown special ability or a symptom of his condition is unclear.