Chapter 319: Hachiman's Weak Point
Dorm Room 404.
Kamuro Masumi was happily devouring the roasted meat and juice Hachiman had brought back.
"Masumi, stay here tonight. Don't go back."
"Wh...at...?"
Kamuro almost choked, her cheeks flushing as she looked at him in shock.
"Do you... do you still want more?"
Hachiman's forehead was lined with black streaks. He said irritably, "Is that all your brain thinks about?"
"Hmph~ Who knows... you... you estrous beast!!" Kamuro grumbled, puffing out her cheeks.
"Actually, if we're talking about being in heat, isn't that you, Masumi?" Hachiman couldn't resist teasing her. "To think a virgin would ask for nine rounds... tsk tsk~ you're quite the formidable woman!"
"Shut up! Don't you dare say it!!"
Turning red with shame and anger, Kamuro lunged at him, flailing her arms. After a brief scuffle, the two nestled back together. Neither spoke, quietly enjoying the beautiful serenity of the moment.
After a long silence, a look of determination flashed in Hachiman's eyes. He spoke first: "Masumi, I..."
"Don't say it!"
Kamuro quickly raised her hand, pressing her fingers against his lips. She lowered her head, leaning against his chest, greedily breathing in his scent.
"Mm, this is fine. I don't want you to be with me just out of a sense of responsibility."
Hachiman wanted to say more, but she cut him off.
"Because I want your 'Genuine Thing' too."
Hachiman fell silent.
Did he like Kamuro Masumi? The answer was definitely yes.
Who wouldn't like a charming, slightly tsundere, and capable maid-like girl? But to say she was his "one and only"... she probably wasn't quite there yet.
'I'm a beast! Hikigaya Hachiman! Since when did you become such a thick-skinned, despicable man?'
"Sorry, Masumi." Hachiman was full of guilt.
"Don't say sorry. I'm the despicable one."
Kamuro knew very well Hachiman's attitude toward her. While he had some affection, it hadn't reached the level of true lovers. She had originally planned to use Sakayanagi Arisu—a master and servant... no! An equal and mutually beneficial partnership—to take down Hachiman together.
But that day outside the Class B classroom, she had overheard Ichinose Honami's conversation and realized Ichinose might take a "forced breakthrough" approach to claim Hachiman.
Kamuro panicked! Her first instinct was to tell Sakayanagi, but on second thought, with Sakayanagi's frail body, she probably couldn't be relied upon.
Thus, Kamuro decided to act alone, throwing caution to the wind. Ultimately, she successfully claimed Hachiman's "First Kill."
Of course, she wasn't naive enough to think that this "raw rice cooked into porridge" scheme would allow her to monopolize him. Doing so would only make her a target. If the other girls joined forces to get her expelled, she'd never see Hachiman again—that would be a total loss.
Therefore, Kamuro made up her mind: she would not accept becoming Hachiman's public girlfriend for the time being.
"... Why do I feel like you've suddenly become very smart?" Hachiman looked at her strangely; he could roughly guess what she was thinking.
"Hmph~ What do you mean 'suddenly'...? I've always been smart, okay!"
Love usually makes people stupid, but perhaps this was a case of hitting rock bottom and rebounding. Kamuro, who wasn't usually the sharpest tool in the shed, found her mind more flexible than ever!
"Yes, yes~ Miss Masumi, the genius of palace intrigue." Hachiman flattered her.
"Of course!" Kamuro smiled proudly at first, then realized something was wrong. Her eyes widened, and she shouted angrily, "Palace intrigue? You shameless bastard, you really do want to start a harem!!"
"No, I don't! Absolutely not!" Hachiman denied it flatly, but his eyes were darting around, looking incredibly guilty.
"Damn it! Did nine times still not drain you dry?" Kamuro grew angrier the more she thought about it and pulled him toward her for another round.
"Don't start, Masumi... your body won't be able to take it!" Hachiman refused with a serious expression.
"Che! It's not like there aren't... unconventional fighting positions. Less talk! Hand over all your remaining stock!"
As she spoke, Kamuro began pulling her black stockings over her hands.
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.
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The Next Day, 8:45 AM.
Hachiman woke up naturally; he had intentionally turned off his phone alarm. Looking at the sleeping Kamuro beside him, he kissed her forehead. He then climbed out of bed quietly and finished washing up in front of the mirror.
Hachiman left unhurriedly, grabbed a quick bite at the cafeteria, and arrived at the school building at 9:15 AM.
This was a serious case of tardiness. Just as he arrived, the bell for the end of the first period rang.
Class D Classroom.
"Hachiman, why are you only arriving now!
You're going to make us lose class points!"
Predictably, as soon as Hachiman walked in, he was bombarded with accusations from Class D. These guys really had some nerve. Between their own lateness, truancy, and early departures, they had lost class points an average of three times per person. Now, on his very first time being late, they were shouting righteously.
It was utterly ridiculous.
Hachiman ignored their barking and returned to his seat.
"Hachiman, why were you late? Are you feeling unwell?" Horikita Suzune, sitting next to him, put down her book and cast a concerned look his way.
"It's nothing, just a bit physically exhausted." Hachiman was telling the truth. After nine battles on the field plus a session of "polishing the weapon," his legs felt like jelly.
"What did you do last night to look so haggard?" Horikita frowned, her gaze scrutinizing him.
Before he could answer, Kushida Kikyo leaned in, intervening in the conversation. "Oh! What time is it? Stop worrying about small things! Hachiman, look at this!"
Kushida opened her phone and clicked on an anonymous message. There were no words, only a few surveillance photos. They showed Hachiman carrying a bag of drinks; from a certain angle, one could clearly see beer cans inside!
"Be... beer?!"
"Th-this is a serious violation!"
Karuizawa Kei and the others saw the message and crowded around with worried expressions.
It was actually quite ironic. In Japan, the legal age for marriage is 18 for men and 16 for women, but the drinking age is 20. While in reality, most high schoolers—and even middle schoolers—secretly try alcohol out of curiosity or rebellion, being caught with photographic evidence is a different story entirely.
"What should we do? Will Hachiman-kun be punished by the school?" Sakura Airi expressed her concern.
"Damn it! Which bastard took these photos?" Hasabe Haruka cursed angrily.
'Well... no need to curse that hard, right?' Hachiman's lip twitched.
Mainly because he was the one who had sent that anonymous message to the group chat himself. His goal was to create a bigger scandal to shift the spotlight of public opinion from Kamuro Masumi to himself.
It seemed the effect was excellent. Compared to the reclusive Kamuro, Hachiman—the "Great Demon King"—clearly attracted much more attention.
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End of Morning Classes.
The broadcast rang out: "Will Hikigaya Hachiman of first-year Class D please come to the Student Council office immediately!"
Under the gloating gazes of his classmates, Hachiman remained calm as he knocked on the Student Council door.
"Hikigaya! You dared to sneak beer? This is a serious violation, a total disgrace to our Student Council!"
As soon as he stepped inside, he was met with a barrage of shouting from Kiriyama Ikuto.
"Kiriyama-senpai, please don't talk nonsense. Which eye saw me drinking beer?" Hachiman responded calmly.
"The surveillance photos are proof, and you still want to deny it?" Kiriyama held up the photos on his phone, looking like he had already won.
"Kiriyama-senpai, I suggest you visit an ophthalmologist." Hachiman spoke with a straight face, his every word dripping with mockery.
"What did you say?!" Kiriyama was instantly enraged.
"Calm down for a moment, Kiriyama-kun."
Nagumo Miyabi, sitting on the sofa chair, finally spoke slowly. "Hikigaya-kun, I believe you wouldn't do something so thoughtlessly stupid. Can you explain?"
"I was walking by the lake last night and happened to find this bag of beer. As for whose it is, I was just about to check the surveillance myself," Hachiman answered nonchalantly.
Just then, another Student Council member found the original owner of the beer in the records.
"This is... Chabashira-sensei? The homeroom teacher of Class D."
In the footage, Chabashira Sae went to the convenience store, bought a bag of beer, wandered by the lake, left the beer on the ground, and walked away. A while later, Hachiman appeared on screen and picked it up.
"Hmph! This is clearly you asking Chabashira-sensei to buy it for you!" Kiriyama insisted.
"Oh? Since Kiriyama-senpai is so certain, were you there at the scene?" Hachiman looked at him with feigned surprise.
"That... However, you clearly had contact with Chabashira-sensei in front of the supermarket!" Kiriyama said coldly.
" I was just saying hello to my teacher." Hachiman lied through his teeth; after all, the surveillance had no audio.
"As expected of the first-year Great Demon King, your work is airtight." Nagumo Miyabi smiled and clapped for him. Then, his tone shifted: "You went through all this trouble to create an eye-catching incident just to cover up the scandal for Kamuro Masumi, right?"
"Are you referring to the rumors?" Hachiman didn't fall into the verbal trap.
"Is it possible those aren't rumors?" Nagumo looked at him meaningfully.
"They are rumors. As long as the full surveillance is pulled, the truth will come to light," Hachiman responded calmly.
"I've seen it. Kamuro Masumi definitely made a movement to tuck a beer can into her sleeve." Nagumo held up his phone and played the footage.
"How does that count as stealing? Maybe she was just too hot and used the cold can to cool her arm? Besides, didn't she put it back in the end?" Hachiman used his pre-planned script to argue forcefully.
"Haha~ Hikigaya-kouhai, do you think that explanation will convince me, the President?" Nagumo sneered.
"At least it convinces me, the Chairman of the Disciplinary Committee." Hachiman's gaze didn't back down an inch.
"Arrogant brat! You're challenging the President's authority?" Kiriyama clenched his fists, his face a mix of anger, helplessness, and frustration.
Once upon a time, he too had challenged Nagumo Miyabi directly. But against the President who held the ultimate power in the Student Council, he had failed every single time. After repeated defeats, he had lost the will to resist and became Nagumo's dog.
"Kiriyama-senpai, could you please shut your mouth? This is a contest between me and President Nagumo. It has nothing to do with you, the Vice President, does it?" Hachiman couldn't be bothered with pleasantries; he might as well have called him a dog on the side of the road.
"You...!" Kiriyama's face turned bright red, but he was speechless.
"Hahahaha!" Nagumo Miyabi laughed delightedly. "How interesting~ Horikita-senpai is about to graduate, and I thought school life would be boring after that. Now it seems Hikigaya-kouhai can provide me with some fun."
"Is that so? Then I look forward to President Nagumo's 'care.' I will do my best to ensure President Nagumo 'graduates' early."
Hachiman spoke those explosive words in a calm tone. Everyone in the Student Council stared with wide eyes.
"Graduate early"... didn't that mean expulsion? This guy actually dared to threaten Nagumo Miyabi with expulsion? Kiriyama was deeply shocked.
Nagumo stopped laughing, a hint of seriousness appearing between his brows. "Hikigaya-kouhai, you've really opened my eyes today. I thought you were the type of man who endured in silence—like a biting dog that doesn't bark."
This was a subtle jab at his arrogance.
"Can't be helped. Everyone calls me a 'Tyrannosaurus Rex' behind my back. I have to play the part occasionally." Hachiman shrugged helplessly.
"I look forward to your performance."
At this point, both sides had essentially dropped their pretenses.
"Well, if there's nothing else, I'll take my leave." Hachiman turned and left the Student Council office.
"President Nagumo, should we report this to the school for a judgment?" Kiriyama suggested.
Nagumo didn't respond immediately, thinking seriously about the pros and cons. Although the President represented the will of the Student Council, Hachiman was the Disciplinary
Chairman in charge of discipline. If he insisted on protecting Kamuro, the Council would have a hard time forcing the issue.
If they brought in the school for a public trial, the school would likely side with the President. However, Kamuro's crime could at most be considered "attempted theft," which wouldn't be enough for expulsion.
"Forget it. Let's stop here for this matter."
Nagumo's attack on Kamuro had only been a whim to test Hachiman's weak point. Now that he had confirmed the weak point, his goal was achieved.
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