Chapter 320 Valentine's Day Preparations
Immediately after Hikigaya Hachiman left, the Student Council issued a clarification notice.
The rumors regarding Kamuro Masumi's theft were found to be inconsistent with the facts after investigation. The rumors regarding Hikigaya Hachiman drinking alcohol were actually a case of him finding beer left behind by a teacher, which has since been returned. The incident was resolved successfully.
.
.
.
After school.
After a long absence from the task, Hikigaya went to the supermarket to buy some ingredients, intending to cook for himself back at the dormitory.
"Welcome home, Hachiman."
The door opened, and before him stood Kamuro Masumi, dressed in an elegant black-and-white maid uniform, making Hikigaya's eyes light up.
Whether it was a delusion or not, this outfit was exactly the same as the one the maid Kamuro Masumi wore in his dreams!
"Ho... how is it?"
Kamuro Masumi fidgeted with her hem, looking unnatural. This was a custom-made maid suit she had ordered based on the version of herself from the dreams.
"As expected, Masumi is the world's cutest maid!!"
Hikigaya gave a thumbs up, his heart pounding uncontrollably.
"Hmph~ Don't think just because you said that, I'll wear this for you every day.
Today is just an exception..."
Kamuro Masumi kept a straight face, trying to maintain her cool persona. However, her crimson cheeks gave her more of a tsundere vibe than a cold one.
"Yes, yes~"
Hikigaya didn't expose her, treating it as their usual flirting. He placed the ingredients on the kitchen counter.
"Let me do it instead."
Kamuro Masumi took initiative.
"Masumi, has your body recovered?" Hikigaya asked with concern.
"It was just a scratch, not a major hemorrhage. I'm not that fragile."
Kamuro Masumi rolled up her sleeves, looking full of energy.
"Alright, alright, I'll leave it to you then."
Seeing her persistence, Hikigaya didn't insist and yielded the position of head chef. However, he stayed by the sink to wash vegetables and help with the odd jobs. The two worked in tandem with perfect chemistry.
"With this many dishes, can the two of us finish them all?"
Kamuro Masumi stared at the six dishes and one soup on the table.
"We'll eat slowly. We used up so much stamina during that 'strenuous exercise,' shouldn't we supplement it properly?"
Hikigaya teased her while throwing an ambiguous glance her way.
"You... how are you still thinking about..."
Kamuro Masumi felt her cheeks burning. She followed up with a serious warning: "Doing this every day will break your body!"
"Relax, don't underestimate the energy of a high school boy!"
Hikigaya chuckled. Having dreams every night had caused him to accumulate a massive amount of suppressed tension.
Usually, he relied on his iron willpower to suppress it, but now it was being released in reality.
Suddenly, Hikigaya felt like life had regained its flavor!
"Eww~~ That look on your face is so indecent!"
Kamuro Masumi gave him a playful roll of her eyes. Just then, the dormitory doorbell rang.
Hikigaya and Kamuro exchanged a look. Hikigaya gestured for her to stay quiet while he went to get rid of the visitor.
Coming to the door, he looked through the peephole. From a level eye-line, he could only see a beret. Hikigaya had to shift his gaze downward to see that familiar yet annoying face of the "bratty loli."
Sakayanagi Arisu seemed to sense him, looking up fixedly at the peephole. "Hachiman-kun, you're watching, aren't you?"
"Arisu, right... I'm busy. If you don't have anything important, please go back."
Hikigaya issued a blunt eviction notice.
Nothing good ever happened when this person showed up.
"I'm here to find Kamuro-san."
Sakayanagi Arisu's answer struck the heart of the matter.
"You're looking for Kamuro... why come to my place?"
Hikigaya's eyes flickered as he tried a final bit of resistance.
"Hehe~ Is Hachiman-kun sure he wants to chat with me through a door?"
Sakayanagi Arisu's tone was certain, as if she had already determined Kamuro Masumi was inside.
"I don't mind. If you mind, you can leave." Hikigaya didn't plan on giving her any face.
"I see~ Then I'll just have to talk about how Hachiman-kun went to the pharmacy yesterday to buy contracep—"
Thud!
Before she could finish, Hikigaya instantly opened the door, covered her mouth with one hand, picked her up with the other, and forced her into the room before locking the door.
"Are you a stalker?"
Hikigaya was frantic. "How did you know I bought that?"
"Last night my stomach was uncomfortable, so I planned to go to the pharmacy for some digestive tablets."
Sakayanagi Arisu stared at him with interest. "I didn't expect to see Hachiman-kun purchasing such an... interesting item."
She then turned a playful gaze toward Kamuro Masumi, who was wearing the maid uniform.
"Kamuro-san, I must say, you are quite bold!"
A mere maid dared to sneak the "first meal" of the male master! It was simply an upheaval of the natural order!
"..."
Kamuro Masumi looked embarrassed, not knowing how to respond.
"Don't blame her, I was the one who couldn't control myself."
Although he had been the passive recipient, Hikigaya was willing to take responsibility.
"No, it was me who... forcibly rode on Hachiman..."
Kamuro Masumi was righteous and dared to act; she never shifted the blame.
Sakayanagi Arisu narrowed her eyes.
"Are you bragging to your master?"
"No... wait!" Kamuro Masumi suddenly snapped out of it, wondering why she was being timid. "You aren't my master!"
"My, my~ still being stubborn at this point, Kamuro-san is truly cute~~" Sakayanagi Arisu continued to provoke her.
"Tch! All you have is your mouth, what can you actually do?" Kamuro Masumi rarely bit back with such sarcasm.
The two traded barbs, the air thick with the smell of gunpowder.
"Hey~ since things have come to this, why don't we eat first?"
Hikigaya mediated the situation, inviting Sakayanagi Arisu to join the meal.
"Fine, for Hachiman-kun's sake."
Despite her dissatisfaction, Sakayanagi Arisu adjusted her mindset quickly. The wood was already turned into a boat; it was an established fact. If she fell out with Kamuro Masumi now, it would only give girls from other classes a chance to sneak in. She might as well go with the flow and secure her own interests.
Thus, the three ate quietly. The expected "shura field" (love triangle battlefield) didn't happen, and Hikigaya breathed a sigh of relief.
Suddenly, Hikigaya felt a slight movement under the table. A foot was gently rubbing his calf.
"Masumi?"
Hikigaya instinctively thought the little maid was getting playful. He reached under the table and grabbed a soft, small, dainty foot. A wicked smile appeared on his face. He guided the "jade foot" to the front lines of the two armies, resisting the "thrust of the long spearman."
"What?"
Kamuro Masumi was eating as usual, giving him a confused look.
'Yo! Still acting for me?'
Wait... the texture felt a bit wrong!
Hikigaya shifted his gaze to the side. Sakayanagi Arisu had been watching him with a playful look the entire time, as if saying "Please, continue."
"Ahem... this was a total accident!"
Hikigaya quickly let go of the foot and gave a sheepish smile.
"I'm very surprised too. I just didn't expect you two to play so... kinky." Sakayanagi Arisu said meaningfully.
"What are you talking about? Masumi and I are in a normal relationship!" Hikigaya argued.
"The 'all-access' kind?" Sakayanagi Arisu got more and more outrageous.
"Arisu, if you keep talking nonsense, believe it or not, I'll deal with you right here!" Hikigaya threatened with a dark expression.
"My, my~ Does Hachiman-kun have the courage to do that?"
Far from being afraid, Sakayanagi Arisu showed a hint of anticipation. "Just a disclaimer: I'm not as easy to fool as Kamuro-san. Are you prepared to become a man of the Sakayanagi family?"
Hearing this, Hikigaya waved his hand in annoyance. "Give me a break, I hate those troublesome rules the most."
Prestigious families had too many rules. In his past dreams where he married into the Sakayanagi family, he was forced to learn aristocratic etiquette; he was sick of it!
"Hehe~ you'll get used to it."
Sakayanagi Arisu understood his character well. Even if he complained, once it reached that stage, he would honestly go and learn so as not to lose face for the Sakayanagi family.
After dinner, the two girls stayed in Hikigaya's room for a long time.
Hikigaya finally spoke up to remind them: "It's late, Arisu, why don't you head back first?"
"I'm waiting for Kamuro-san so we can leave together."
Sakayanagi Arisu clearly intended to take the other girl with her.
"Tch~ You're just afraid I'll eat Hachiman up, aren't you?" Kamuro Masumi curled her lip in disdain.
"Yes, you are quite greedy." Sakayanagi Arisu nodded, speaking the truth.
"I feel like you're making an innuendo..."
"If you don't like innuendos, I can speak plainly. Kamuro-san likes to eat sperm—"
"HEY!!!"
Seeing the conversation getting more and more explicit, Hikigaya interrupted. Such foul language was a violation of public morals and had to be stopped.
"Fine, both of you go back."
Hikigaya had to painfully abandon the idea of another "PK" with Kamuro Masumi tonight. But it didn't matter. In his sleep, he dreamed of the master-servant pair, Sakayanagi Arisu and Kamuro Masumi, again.
This time, Hikigaya had no scruples and could use them boldly!
-
--
-
Time moved to late January.
Campus life regained a rare, brief moment of peace. There were mini-exams at the end of the month, and everyone in class was busy cramming at the last minute.
However, according to Chabashira-sensei, the scores of these mini-exams would not count toward the class points. Good scores wouldn't result in points, and bad scores wouldn't lead to punishment.
Unsurprisingly, the people in Class D were slacking off. Horikita Suzune tried to scold everyone a few times, but she was ignored and eventually gave up.
"See, I told you these people are like rotten wood that cannot be carved!"
Hikigaya stated calmly, without lowering his voice. The surrounding students could only seethe in silence; no one dared to openly oppose Hikigaya.
After finally finishing the eight exams, Hikigaya's face looked a bit gloomy.
"Hachiman, how did you do?"
Horikita Suzune asked, concerned about academic performance as always.
"I think it's fine, except for some specific subjects."
"Which ones?"
Hikigaya didn't want to answer. Mathematics was definitely his lifelong enemy!
"Hachiman, you seem to have become idle lately."
Horikita Suzune knit her brows and began her incessant lecturing.
"Yeah, I know. There have been a lot of things going on lately."
The forest exam had just passed, and then the rumor incident happened, greatly distracting Hikigaya.
"That won't do! Studying is a student's most important task; everything else is secondary." Horikita Suzune's expression was exceptionally serious.
"Tch~ putting on an act again." Kushida Kikyo looked at her with her usual distaste.
"Instead of that, why don't we talk about something more important?"
Karuizawa Kei placed her hands on Hikigaya's shoulders, her eyes full of smiles.
"Speaking of which, it'll be February soon."
"Valentine's Day is coming!" Matsushita Chiaki said.
"Hachiman-kun~ what kind of Valentine's gift do you want?" Sato Maya was direct as always.
"If possible, I don't want any." Hikigaya had little interest.
In past Valentine's Days, he could only receive chocolate from his sister. Although it was just cheap stuff bought at a convenience store, with the "Little Sister Power" buff, it became super delicious. Without his sister this year, Hikigaya couldn't muster any interest.
"Ah~ how can you be like that! You're no fun, Hachiman-kun!" Karuizawa Kei complained.
"Hehe~ Is Hachiman-chan worried about receiving too much chocolate that day?" Hasabe Haruka spoke incisively.
"What kind of 'King of Normies' talk is that? That's too demonic!" Hikigaya's mouth twitched.
It reminded him of the personal experience of a certain blonde handsome guy in his middle school class. On Valentine's Day, that guy received so many gifts that they piled up over his entire desk.
Hikigaya had spent that whole day chanting the "Normies Explode" curse in his heart. Unfortunately, his magical power was limited; the guy was not only unaffected but, after noticing Hikigaya's gaze, magnanimously offered him a box of chocolate... that was adding insult to injury!!
"I wonder if Hachiman-kun likes handmade chocolate..." Sakura Airi murmured.
"Anyway, Hachiman-kun should look forward to it!" Kushida Kikyo said with a giggle.
"I said, just forget it..." Hikigaya looked helpless.
He thought about how if he accepted Valentine's gifts, he'd have to return the favor one by one for White Day next month. Just thinking about it was a headache!
"That's a no-no~ Hachiman-chan, you should accept the girls' feelings with gratitude," Hasabe Haruka lectured solemnly.
"You guys... fine, whatever."
Seeing he couldn't stop them, Hikigaya gave up. He could already imagine that Valentine's Day would be a disaster for him!
Hopefully, it wouldn't cause public outrage and lead to him being mobbed.
Read ahead (160 chapters) by supporting me on buymeacoffee com/varietl or ko-fi edwriting