Chapter 260: Dust's RequestThe tavern's wooden door was kicked open rudely, and accompanied by the smell of low-quality tobacco and cheap perfume, that short-haired blonde Spearman with the look of a delinquent—Dust—swaggered in.He immediately locked onto Haru, who was staring blankly at his glass at the bar, and sat right down on the round stool next to him, casually picking up a peanut from the plate in front of Haru and tossing it into his mouth."Yo, Haru! I heard you struck it rich lately? Why are you drinking alone here? That's not like your style."Dust chuckled, revealing two rows of somewhat uneven teeth."Stop hanging around that silver-haired brat all day. A man should be out on the plains breaking a sweat! I happen to have a big job here; are you interested?"Haru glanced at him sideways, and before he could speak, Kazuma leaned over, looking at Dust with a wary expression."Hey, Dust, nothing good ever happens when you come looking for us. I still haven't settled the score for that time you said you'd take us to catch a Golden Slime, but we ended up being chased over three hills by a herd of bulls in heat.""That was an accident! An accident!"Dust waved his hand, his expression suddenly becoming serious (though he still looked very punchable)."This time it's for real. A Mutated Griffin has appeared deep in the forest outside the city. That guy stole all the supplies from a merchant caravan, and the bounty is terrifyingly high! But my group of lowlife friends are all hungover and haven't woken up today, so I thought..."He turned to look at Aqua, who was staring longingly at Haru's glass; Megumin, who was clutching her stomach while trying to steal leftovers from the table; and Darkness, who had fallen into a state of self-loathing because she was being ignored."Take your team of weirdos plus Kazuma. With your tactical coordination and my bravery, that Griffin will be easy pickings. When the time comes, we'll split the bounty fifty-fifty... no, sixty-forty! You get sixty and I get forty, how about it?""A Griffin? A high-level monster like that must have many shiny feathers!"Aqua was instantly revitalized, jumping onto the table and shouting."Haru, let's go quickly! Once we have that money, I can buy that vintage version of Holy Water!""A Griffin?"Megumin adjusted her eyepatch, a dangerous red light flickering in her eyes. Although her stomach was still growling in protest, her aura began to climb once more."As one who wields Explosion Magic, I require a sacrifice of sufficient weight to announce my arrival. Haru, if you are willing to provide a sumptuous pre-battle meal, I wouldn't mind using that one strike to turn that beast to ash."Darkness clenched her fists, her breathing becoming rapid."A Griffin's claws... I heard they can easily shred the strongest armor... if it's that level of ravaging..."Haru put down his glass and sighed as he looked at this group of people who each had their own hidden agendas and questionable intelligence, yet possessed startling combat power.Perhaps a chaotic battle really was the best medicine to forget one's melancholy.Haru set down his glass and turned his head slightly, meeting Kazuma's face which was written all over with scum and dirty tricks."Hey, Haru."Kazuma lowered his voice as if plotting a scheme to overthrow the kingdom, his dead-fish eyes darting about as he pointed at Dust, who was bragging to Aqua."I know Dust best. If he weren't certain or if there were no benefit, he would never come looking for us. A monster like a Griffin can fly; if we can't win, he'll definitely be the first to bolt. So... why don't we strike first?"Haru raised an eyebrow, gesturing for him to continue."Look, Dust is a Warrior. While his defense can't compare to that pervert Darkness, his ability to run away is top-notch."Kazuma chuckled and rubbed his hands together."Once we get to the nest, we'll say you're the tactical commander and need someone to draw the Griffin's attention head-on. Dust will definitely charge in for the sake of his pride, and then we can slowly deal damage from the rear. If things go wrong, he's a ready-made bait, and it'll be easier for us to retreat, right?"Haru took a deep breath, quickly simulating that scene in his mind.Indeed, Dust had scammed many people, and as the leader of the Axel punks, his toughness was well-known to all.Most importantly, if he could be made to draw the fire, then Megumin's extremely long chanting time would be perfectly guaranteed."Makes sense, Kazuma. As expected of you, such an unprincipled plan is simply genius."A scum curve appeared at the corner of Haru's mouth as he patted Kazuma on the shoulder."Not at all, it's all thanks to your excellent guidance, Haru."Kazuma also wore an identical sinister smile.Haru stood up, cleared his throat, and put on a serious and reliable expression before turning to Dust."Dust, I've thought it over. We'll take this quest. And since you are the initiator and the bravest Warrior among us, the task of suppressing the Griffin head-on and showing off the style of Axel's strongest Spearman belongs to no one but you!""Oh! As expected of Haru, you have good taste!"Dust was completely swept away by the flattery, proudly thumping his chest, completely failing to notice the black aura that was practically overflowing behind Haru and Kazuma."No problem! Leave the front to me, and you guys just watch from behind as I dominate the field!""Then, Megumin."Haru looked at the Crimson Demon Clan girl who was stuffing the last piece of bread into her mouth."Get ready to work once you're full. After Dustdraws the Griffin's attention, use your most prideful magic to crush that beast along with... cough, along with the enemy's will to fight.""Leave it to me!"Megumin coolly wiped the breadcrumbs from the corner of her mouth and planted her staff firmly on the ground."Under the radiance of Explosion Magic, all obstacles shall turn to nothingness!"Moonlight spilled over the plains on the outskirts of Axel as the group moved stealthily through the dense thickets.Haru looked down to observe the Silver Scale in his shirt, which was growing increasingly hot, trying to distinguish the scent of wild beast mixed with mana fluctuations in the air."Don't worry, Haru! A request of this level is a piece of cake for a future Great Adventurer like me!"Dust carried his long spear on his shoulder as he walked at the front of the group, occasionally turning back to wink at Megumin and Darkness."Watch closely and see what a textbook Thrustlooks like!"Just as he finished speaking, the originally calm night sky was suddenly torn apart by a violent gale.A massive shadow accompanied by a piercing screech dived from the clouds, its hawk-like eyes glowing with a faint green light that looked exceptionally terrifying in the dark."Skree!!!"With a roar loud enough to shatter eardrums, the Mutated Griffin slammed heavily onto the center of the plains.After the Dust settled, what appeared before everyone was a creature as tall as a three-story building, its body covered in steel-hard bluish-purple feathers, while its hindquarters were the sturdy body of a lion as solid as rock.With every breath, tiny electric sparks sputtered from its nostrils.
Chapter 261: That Which Must Never Be Lost"Whoa, whoa... Has this thing been eating super fertilizer or something?"Dust's originally dashing charge instantly froze.He looked up at the giant beast, which was three times larger than he had expected, and the spear in his hand trembled slightly.The griffin lowered its head, its massive beak less than half a meter from the tip of Dust's nose, as a thick, foul stench washed over him."Farewell!!!"Without any hesitation, Dust let out an incredibly high-pitched scream, turned around, and bolted at a speed that surpassed human limits.Not only did he run, but he also frantically waved his arms and shouted as he fled:"Help! Haru! Kazuma! This isn't some Mutated Griffin, this is the griffin ancestor! It's going to eat me! It's definitely going to eat the most handsome one first!"The planned frontal distraction instantly vanished. Dust charged toward the rear positions Haru had originally deployed like an out-of-control cannonball, while the enraged Mutated Griffinflapped its massive wings, kicking up a gale strong enough to overturn cattle and sheep, as it chased closely behind."That bastard!"Kazuma was hopping mad; his prepared [Snipe] stance was knocked half-askew by the gale."He's leading the monster right to us! Haru, think of something! Megumin is still chanting!""Mmm, mmm..."Megumin was currently standing on one leg, striking an extremely exaggerated casting pose. An unstable red light had already gathered at the tip of her staff, but due to the gale, her slender body was swaying like a candle in the wind."Abyssal Red... Ah! Don't push me! The chant is about to break!""Oh ho ho! Look at those powerful claws! Look at that beak full of destructive power!"Instead of running away, Darkness charged toward the gale with a flushed face, spreading her arms to block Dust's path of retreat."Come! Ravage me! Use your rough wings to crush me into the dirt!"Haru watched the battlefield descend into chaos, his temples throbbing.Dust's flight had completely disrupted their tactical deployment; the situation had now turned into a free-for-all quagmire.The battle on the plains had escalated from bad to absurd.Dust was running for his life, tears and snot flying in the wind. In his extreme panic, he wasn't looking at the path beneath his feet at all.Meanwhile, Aqua was crouching in the grass, trying to pick up a premium Cabbage that had just been blown away by the wind."Waaah! Out of the way, you stinking third-rate goddess! I'm going to be eaten! I'm going to be eaten!"Dust let out a pitch-shifted scream, his toe catching hard on Aqua's ornate but cumbersome silk stockings."Ouch?! It hurts, it hurts... Wait, my Cabbage!"With a crisp "thud," Aqua was launched like a blue meat bun, tracing an incredibly graceful parabola through the air. Even more unfortunately, as the Mutated Griffin was opening its mouth wide for a thunderous roar at Dust, the end of Aqua's flight path was aimed squarely at that bloody maw large enough to swallow a cow."Haru! Kazuma! Help meeee! This big bird's breath stinks so baaaaad!"Aqua flailed her limbs in mid-air, tears gushing out like fountains and reflecting crystal-clear light under the moonlight."Hey! That's like throwing a meat bun at a dog... No, that's an idiot feeding a griffin!"Kazuma's eyes nearly popped out in shock. He instinctively notched an arrow, but looking at Aqua's frantically wiggling butt, he had no opening to take a shot."Haru! Do something! Even if that goddess is useless, if she gets eaten, we won't have any more respawn coins!"The griffin was clearly stunned by this sudden blue projectile. A flash of disgust crossed its eerie green eyes, as if it were considering whether this creature, smelling of cheap perfume and alcohol, was even edible."Ooh... that feeling of being swallowed... Aqua, you're so cunning! That spot should have been mine!"Darkness knelt on the ground, covering her face with her hands, her body trembling violently as she actually looked on with extreme envy.Haru felt the Silver Scale in his pocket grow as hot as a branding iron.He stared intently deep into the griffin's throat, which was fully exposed as it prepared to swallow Aqua—there, a pendant shimmering with a silver glow was flickering in and out of sight with the griffin's breath.That was Sylphi's Power Fragment!"Everyone, focus! Forget about that idiot goddess!"Haru took a deep breath, his gaze becoming cold and decisive."Megumin, ignore the wind and aim directly for the griffin's open mouth! Kazuma, use Create Water to match my Wind Blade and give this guy a stomach-pumping special! We have to get that thing back before it closes its mouth!""Oh, oh! That sounds pretty scum, but I like it!"Kazuma immediately understood.Just as Aqua's tear-streaked face was about to make intimate contact with the griffin's barbed tongue, survival instinct caused this useless goddess to explode with power beyond common sense."Nooooo! I absolutely refuse to die like this! God Blow! No! Create Water!!!"Following Aqua's heart-wrenching scream, a stream of clear Holy Water, two meters in diameter and acting like a high-pressure water cannon, erupted from her trembling palms. The volume of water was staggering, as if the entire moat of Axel had been instantly transported into the griffin's throat."Guh-ack?! Cough, cough, cough, cough!!"The Mutated Griffin's majestic roar instantly turned into a comical choking sound.Its huge eyeballs bulged from the violent coughing. Not only did its massive mouth fail to close, but it opened even wider due to the intense purifying sting of the Holy Water's sacred attribute.The griffin shook its massive head frantically, trying to cough up the Holy Water that had flooded its lungs. Its giant wings flapped wildly against the ground, kicking up splashes of mud that smelled of Holy Water.Meanwhile, Aqua used the immense recoil of the Create Water to zip through the air like a leaking balloon, finally landing with a "splat" as she stuck to a nearby crooked tree in an ungraceful spread-eagle position before slowly sliding down."Good chance! Haru, now!"Seeing this, Kazuma's eyes lit up. He immediately activated his [Lurk] skill, turning into a phantom as he circled toward the griffin's flank."Strike while it's down! That shiny thing must be a treasure!"Haru felt the Silver Scale in his pocket burning so hot it was almost searing through his clothes. He knew that a part of Sylphi was crying out in pain deep within that monster's throat.That was something that must never be lost.
Chapter 262: Use Your Thick Claws"Megumin, suppress its movements! No need for Explosion, use your mana pressure to disrupt its balance!"Haru shouted as he took advantage of the Griffin's coughing fit. He pushed off the ground, lunging toward that stinking maw like an arrow released from a bow."Darkness, block its claws! Don't let it close its mouth!""Leave it to me! This task of having one's body forced open by a giant beast... ah no, I mean, forcing open a giant beast's body, is exactly what I wanted!"Darkness let out an excited moan as she threw herself forward, using her heavy pauldrons to firmly prop up the Griffin's upper jaw.The moment Haru's fingertips touched that cold, violently vibrating Silver Pendant, the world seemed to fall silent.The Griffin's violent coughing, Darkness's excited panting, and even Aqua's distant wailing all faded away in that instant.A massive and ancient stream of information surged through his fingertips into Haru's mind, sending shivers through his very soul. Within those fragmented memories, he saw a pristine white ruin floating above the clouds—Sylphi's true home.He saw a young Sylphi cowering in fear in a corner of an altar, surrounded by a collapsing dome and burning magical flames.To escape some unspeakable Shadow of the End, Sylphi had torn her soul into several fragments, housing them within these divine artifacts. She had fallen into an eternal slumber, waiting for someone who could resonate with the Silver Scales to wake her.And this pendant was the core component that carried her perception and memories."So... you've been waiting in this lonely Darkness all this time?"Haru muttered to himself, his confused gaze instantly becoming incredibly firm."Haru! What are you dazing off for? Get out of there!"Kazuma's roar shattered the illusion like a clap of thunder."That beast is about to close its mouth! Darkness's arms are shaking!"Indeed, the Griffin's choking sensation from the Holy Water had subsided. Its eerie green eyes burned with unprecedented rage, and a grinding sound of bone against bone came from deep within its throat.Although Darkness was flushed and looked ecstatic, her heavy armor groaned under the overwhelming force of the Griffin's bite."Got it!"Haru exerted a sudden burst of strength and ripped the pendant's cord.The moment he pulled back, the Griffin's massive beak snapped shut with a bang, and the resulting shockwave sent Darkness flying.Having regained its freedom, the Griffin let out a roar powerful enough to tear through the clouds. It spread its sun-blotting wings, its body wreathed in violent azure lightning, ready to completely annihilate these humans who had desecrated its treasure."Darker than twilight, redder than blood..."Megumin's chant finally reached its critical point. The ground beneath her feet cracked as it failed to contain the overflowing mana, and her exposed red left eye seemed to burn with the fires of hell."Haru! Get out of the way! I'm going to blow up everything nearby, along with my hunger!""Everyone! Get down!!!" Haru clutched the pendant and dove into the grass."Explosion!!!"A massive mushroom cloud rose slowly over the plains of Axel. The air was filled with a scorched smell and the dry, intense mana unique to Explosion Magic.As the smoke and Dust thinned, the once-unbeatable mutated Griffin had been reduced to a pile of smoking charcoal. A crater dozens of meters in diameter had been blasted into the ground.Directly above the crater, a three-meter-long primary feather from the Griffin, charred black but still sturdy, was stuck diagonally into a mound like a kite pole."Help... someone get me down... that's my bounty... my eris... that's my booze money..."Dust was currently in an extremely comical position, his belt hooked by the broken feather. He was swaying in the air like a Teru Teru Bozu doll.One of his boots was nowhere to be seen, and his face was as black as if he had just crawled out of a coal mine. Yet, he still persistently reached out toward the Griffin's corpse, muttering nonsense about the bounty."Pfft, hahahaha! Haru, look! That guy is like a salted fish hung up to dry!"Kazuma crawled out of the dirt, dusting himself off while pointing at Dust and laughing shamelessly."Is this the heroic figure of Axel's Strongest Delinquent? It's truly eye-opening!""Waaaaah! My clothes! My favorite Holy Silk Pajamas... I mean, adventuring gear! Haru, look, it's all turned black!"Aqua didn't have time to laugh at Dust. She sat on the ground, holding the hem of her now-tattered skirt, wailing as if her heart were breaking."Pay me back! You have to make that big winged bird pay! Waaaah, it's already dead? Then make Dust pay!"The smoke hadn't yet cleared, and in addition to the scorched smell, a chilling, beastly stench filled the air.At the edge of the crater blasted by the Explosion Magic, behind the charred bushes, pairs of eyes like red lanterns lit up one after another.They were the predators most feared by novice Adventurers around Axel—One-Hit Bears.Attracted by the earth-shaking explosion and the smell of charred Griffin meat, they were now crouching low, letting out thunderous growls from their throats. They clearly saw this group of exhausted Adventurers as an after-dinner dessert."Hey, hey, hey! Haru, this is no joke!"Kazuma, who had been laughing at Dust, turned pale instantly. His sharp senses had already detected the formation of a perimeter."Those are One-Hit Bears! And a whole pack of them! Megumin is as useless as scrap paper now, Aqua is still crying, and Darkness... Darkness, wipe that look of anticipation for a bear hug off your face!""Eh? One-Hit Bears?"Aqua stopped crying and looked at the red eyes with a sob, then let out an even louder scream."Kyaaaa! Why are there so many One-Hit Bears here?! Haru! Save me! I haven't even had tonight's premium Bubbly Wine yet! I don't want to die here and get licked by bears!""Oh ho... The legendary One-Hit Bear Hug that can crush a person's bones?"Darkness stood up, supporting herself against her damaged armor. The flush on her cheeks was clearly visible even through the smoke. She even took a step forward, spreading her arms wide."Come! Use your thick claws to ravage my sturdy body to your heart's content!"At that moment, the lead giant bear couldn't wait any longer. It suddenly reared up its three-meter-tall body and let out a deafening roar. Its heavy paws stomped craters into the ground as it turned into a black gale, charging straight at Dust, who was still hanging from the feather."Help!! It's coming! It's going to do this and that to me! Haru, save meee!"Terrified, Dust kicked his legs wildly in the air, swinging back and forth like a live bait.
Chapter 263: A Traveler Swordsman Who Is Just a Little Bit StrongerWhat should have been a tragic scene of a brutal siege had now evolved into a bizarre spectacle that would make any passerby call the police.Three massive One-Hit Bears, capable of crushing granite with a single paw, were roaring as they surrounded Darkness in the center.Their claws, as thick as tree trunks, descended upon Darkness's armor and shoulders with the whistling sound of rushing wind.However, the expected sound of bones snapping never came; instead, it was replaced by Darkness's increasingly high-pitched moans, which even carried a certain divine (perverted) radiance."Ooooh! This heavy, wild, sweaty impact! This feeling of being forcibly squeezed by furry bodies... it's, it's the ultimate reward, ahhh!"Darkness's face, which had been pale from exhaustion, was now so red it looked like it might bleed.Under the stimulation of extreme pleasure, a biological miracle occurred within the hidden monstrous strength of this Crusader.She suddenly threw her arms wide and tightly hugged a One-Hit Bear that was about to bite her shoulder. Her strength was so immense that she actually squeezed a whimper out of the two-hundred-kilogram beast, making it sound like a kitten."Come on! You cute little things! Use more force! Completely... crush this useless body of mine!"Like an immovable steel fortress, Darkness single-handedly held back three bears.But even so, the remaining five One-Hit Bears had already bypassed this hunk of masochistic steel and were drooling as they approached Megumin, who was collapsed on the ground, and a screaming Aqua."Hey! Haru! Darkness is broken! She's completely broken!"Kazuma shouted in terror as he dragged Meguminbackward by her feet."Look over there! Those two bears have their eyes on Aqua's butt! If that girl gets bitten, she'll definitely cry so hard she'll attract every monster within ten miles!""Don't come any closer! Don't come any closer, ahhh!"Aqua was frantically pulling various party trick props from her bosom, even attempting to perform Natures Beauty for the bear in the lead."Take this! This is a top-tier water-spraying performance... Eh? No water? Haru! Help me, I'll never waste money again!"Just as Haru was about to forcibly drag away the useless goddess who was now incoherent with fear, an unexpected change occurred.At the edge of the originally gloomy forest, a dazzling golden sword qi sliced through the thick smoke and night without warning.Like a blade through butter, the sword qi precisely grazed the tip of Aqua's nose and instantly sliced the drooling One-Hit Bear, which had pounced into mid-air, into two halves."Eh?" Aqua's folding fan froze in mid-air, and the water she was about to spray was sucked back into her nose from the shock."Cough, cough! Was that... an aurora just now?"With a series of light and rhythmic footsteps, a young girl wearing a magnificent traveler's cloak, with a holy sword at her waist and holy blonde hair like moonlight, slowly stepped out of the shadows.As her sapphire-clear eyes swept across the chaotic battlefield, they revealed a level of composure and majesty that didn't match her age."Besieging unarmed civilians in the outskirts late at night is not the behavior befitting a King of the Forest."The girl's voice was sweet but carried an undeniable power.With a slight movement of her body, she transformed into a streak of golden light that the naked eye could barely track, weaving through the pack of bears.In the time of a single breath, the remaining four giant bears pouncing toward Haru and the others didn't even have time to scream before they all stiffened in place, their bodies splitting into several neat cuts before crashing to the ground."So... so strong... Hey, Haru, did you see that? Is that a sword technique a human can use?"Kazuma's mouth hung wide open, and he didn't even notice that Megumin, whom he was still dragging, had fallen into a mud pit.On the other side, the three One-Hit Bears being held in a death grip by Darkness, already starting to roll their eyes, suddenly burst with an unprecedented will to survive the moment they saw the girl appear.They struggled desperately to break free from Darkness's embrace of death and scrambled into the depths of the jungle, as if the petite girl was ten thousand times more terrifying than the perverted female knight behind them."Ah... don't go! My hug isn't over yet... that feeling of suffocating pleasure..."Darkness knelt on the ground, reaching out despondently, but only caught a few strands of bear fur.The girl sheathed her sword with a crisp click.Her golden hair shimmered with a dreamlike luster under the moonlight. As she turned around, preparing to offer an elegant and reserved smile, Haru instantly identified her from the magnificent crest peeking from her cloak and the holy sword, Caliburn, which radiated a divine aura even while sheathed."Alice?!"Haru blurted it out almost instinctively.Upon hearing that name, the golden-haired girl's dignified and majestic expression instantly crumbled. She jumped like a kitten whose tail had been stepped on, her sapphire eyes filled with panic as she waved her hands frantically, trying to cover it up."N-No! You have the wrong person! I'm just a passing, ordinary traveler swordsman who's just a little bit stronger! Really!"Stop pretending. With sword skills that exceed human limits and that holy sword, who else could it be but Her Highness Princess Alice of the Belzerg Kingdom?"Kazuma finally realized as well. Leaving Megumin, who was still blowing bubbles in the mud pit, he scrambled over with a look of disbelief."Wait a minute, the Royal Capital isn't close to here! Why are you appearing in the outskirts where perverts and monsters are everywhere?!"Seeing that her identity was completely exposed, Alice stuck out her tongue sheepishly and gave a mischievous smile appropriate for her age.She lifted the hem of her cloak and gave a bow that was informal yet extremely friendly to Haru and the others."Hehe, I've been found out? Since my lessons in the palace were so boring, and... I missed Big Brother and the others, I snuck out to play with you. This is a secret mission that even Sylhein and Pendragondon't know about!""P-Princess?!"Aqua, who had just been throwing a tantrum on the ground, instantly performed a 'resurrection.' She wiped her tears at lightning speed, straightened her tattered skirt, and struck a solemn and divine pose."Oh my, if it isn't Alice? As the goddess who guides humanity, I was actually using Natures Beauty to reform those wild bears just now. I didn't expect you to act so quickly. Since you're here, would you like to make a small donation to the Axis Order... Ouch!"
Chapter 264: The Brainless Delinquent WarriorHaru gave Aqua a sharp tap on the head, interrupting her scamming lines."Alice, running out on your own is a serious problem."Haru looked at the little princess before him, whose eyes were full of anticipation, and sighed helplessly."However, it's true that I have you to thank for saving the day just now. Since you're already here, I can't exactly leave you out in the middle of nowhere.""Hooray! I knew Lord Haru was the best!"Alice cheered and lunged forward, hugging Haru's arm. She had completely lost the coldness she displayed when slaying the giant bear earlier."Then for the next few days, I'll be a member of your party, and we'll go on an adventure together!""Ooh! Her Highness has joined the party! Is this the legendary 'pro carrying the team'?"Kazuma rubbed his hands together excitedly."Haru, let's hurry back to town! I can't wait to see the looks on those guys at the Guild when we bring back the Princess... Wait, if the Royal Capital's defense force finds out, will we be executed as kidnappers?"Facing Alice's expectant, sparkling sapphire-blue eyes, Haru knew that if he let her enter the city wearing that gold-trimmed cloak embroidered with the royal crest, Axel's city gates would be swarmed by the Royal Guard within five minutes."Fine. Since we're playing the game of commoner Adventurers, that outfit definitely won't do."Haru sighed and rummaged through his backpack, pulling out a spare set of slightly oversized, coarse cloth Adventurer's clothes.First, he had Alice wrap that conspicuous Holy Sword tightly with strips of grey rags until it looked like an ordinary fire poker. Then, he draped a somewhat faded brown cloak over Alice's small shoulders.To completely hide her overly prominent moonlight-gold hair, Haru also plopped a crooked old leather hat on her head, pulling the brim down low."Hehe, Lord Haru, do I look like one of those battle-hardened, mysterious wandering swordsmen now?"Alice spun around excitedly. The oversized clothes billowed with her movements, but instead of looking intimidating, she looked like a child who had stolen an adult's clothes—so cute one couldn't help but want to pat her head."Yeah, you look exactly like a rookie who got kicked out of the Guild because they couldn't afford rent."Kazuma commented snarkily from the side, wiping a smudge of mud off his face."But seriously, as long as you don't open your mouth, this shabby look is actually quite convincing. By the way, Your Highness, as a commoner Adventurer, you must pounce on any copper coin you see on the ground immediately. Please keep that in mind.""Kazuma! Don't corrupt Alice!"Darkness finally recovered from her cognitive breakdown. Looking at the Princess dressed as a commoner, she gave a strained, awkward bow with a twitching eye."Your Highness... no, Miss Alice. Although this attire is extremely disrespectful, for your safety... please bear with it. Also, if... if you feel this coarse fabric rubbing against your skin uncomfortably, please tell me! I can endure that pain for you!""Not at all, Darkness! This rough feeling is actually quite novel!"Alice happily grabbed Haru's hand, completely disregarding etiquette."Then let's go! Axel's nights must have many interesting things, right? Like those... legendary fire-breathing taverns, and Slimes running all over the place?"Haru glanced at Megumin, who was still groaning in the mud pit, and Aqua, who was trying to piece together a shattered Holy Water bottle, and shook his head helplessly.With Megumin on his back and the runaway princess's hand in his, he led this extremely eclectic group toward the gates of Axel.Under the moonlight, the group's shadows stretched long.Haru could already sense that the Adventurers Guild in Axel tonight was likely to face another storm because of this group's return.When Haru pushed open the heavy, beer-stained wooden doors of the Adventurers Guild, a wave of heat mixed with the smell of cheap ale hit him. The Guild was brightly lit, and the noise was loud enough to lift the roof."I'm telling you, that Griffin's talons were only 0.01 centimeters from my throat! But who am I? I'm Dust, the strongest warrior in Axel! I did a sliding tackle, zipped right under its belly, and followed up with a backhand strike!"Dust was standing on a tavern table, waving a Griffin feather he'd picked up from somewhere, bragging loudly to a group of drunken rookie Adventurers.Just as he reached the climax of his story, he caught sight of Haru's group entering through the door out of the corner of his eye."Yo! If it isn't Haru! And Kazuma, you guys are finally back!"Dust leaped down from the table and wobbled over, laughing as he slapped Haru on the shoulder."How was it? Did you see my heroic display earlier? Even though there was a tiny accident at the end and I got hung out on a tree, that was all tactics! Tactics, you get me?"His gaze quickly fell upon Alice, who was being led by Haru and wearing a large hood.Even though Alice was wearing coarse hemp clothes, that petite and cute aura she radiated—which couldn't be hidden—instantly ignited the delinquent warrior's soul for hitting on girls."Ho? Haru, this isn't very cool of you."Dust leaned in with a smirk, completely failing to notice the murderous look in Darkness's eyes nearby. He leaned down casually, trying to see the face under Alice's hood."Where'd you kidnap such a cute little sister from? Hey, little girl, there's no future following these penniless losers. Why not consider joining the great Dust's unit? I can treat you to the most expensive... Ouch!"Haru simply stuck out his foot, precisely tripping Dust's unsteady step.With a thud, Dust fell flat on his face in a perfect faceplant right in front of Alice's feet."Dust, if you don't want to wake up in Axel's moat tomorrow, you'd better shut your filthy mouth," Haruwarned coldly.Alice wasn't angry; instead, it was as if she were seeing a rare species. She hid behind Haru, curiously poking half her head out to observe the prone Dust, whispering to herself:"Lord Haru, is this the 'unique local customs of Axel' you mentioned? This big brother's performance art is so special.""Pfft..." Kazuma was struggling to hold back his laughter nearby."That's right, Your Highness. This is an Axelspecialty—the brainless delinquent warrior. Please make sure not to imitate him.""Who are you calling brainless!"Dust grumbled as he scrambled up. Before he could lash out, he met Darkness's eyes, which were burning with fury and a sense of justice."Dust! To be so foul-mouthed toward this... this noble Miss Alice, you are a disgrace to Adventurers!"Darkness stepped forward to shield Alice, her hand already gripping her sword hilt."If you dare take one more step, I'll... I'll let you know the meaning of a Crusader's punishment!"Other Adventurers in the Guild also cast curious glances, and murmurs broke out everywhere."Who is that little girl?""Is she a new member of Haru's group?""She looks so frail, can she actually handle it?"
Chapter 265: A Dangerous Creature About to MutateHaru looked at Dust, who was still rubbing his nose on the ground, and the surrounding Adventurers who were stretching their necks with faces full of gossip. He took a deep breath and spoke in a matter-of-fact tone tinged with a hint of pity."Everyone, stop guessing. This is... Alice, an Apprentice Swordsman I just recruited. From today on, she is a new member of our party."The originally noisy guild hall fell into a deathly silence in that instant.Dust's face, which had been wearing a smirk, instantly froze. The hand he was about to reach out to tease Alice retracted as if it had touched an electric current. He scrambled back three meters, his eyes filled with horror and sympathy."Wh-What?! Haru, have you finally reached the point where you won't even let go of a little girl who looks like she hasn't even been weaned yet?!"Dust's voice cracked. He pointed at Alice, then looked at Aqua, who was giggling at the air nearby, and then at the Explosion Maniac who was still unconscious on Haru's back."Hey, did you hear that? This little girl is joining that freak asylum! It's over, all over. Axel is going to have yet another hopeless weirdo!"The surrounding Adventurers all showed expressions that said 'as expected.' Their original gaze of looking at a beautiful girl (young girl) instantly turned into a gaze reserved for some kind of dangerous creature about to mutate."Tsk tsk, what a cute little girl. Why would she be so desperate to join Haru's side?""Shh, keep it down! Did you forget that Crimson Demon Clan girl named Megumin? And that masochistic Crusader who knows nothing but defense? Anyone who can join that team is definitely not a normal person!""Exactly, this kid must have some earth-shattering quirk too. Maybe she's actually a lunatic who likes to poke hornets' nests with a holy sword..."In an instant, the male creatures in the guild who had ill intentions or curiosity toward Alice all took a step back in unison, leaving a huge empty circle around her.In their eyes, this little girl wearing a crooked hat was currently radiating a black aura known as 'abnormality' from all over her body.Alice looked at the reactions of the people around her, blinked in confusion, and tugged at Haru's sleeve:"Lord Haru, why does everyone look so afraid of me? Is it because my disguise is too successful and I look like a very powerful peerless master?""Ahaha... in a sense, you are indeed a peerless master."Kazuma chuckled dryly from the side, wiping cold sweat from his forehead."Don't worry, Your Highness. As long as you stay in this party, I guarantee no one in Axel will dare to have designs on you, because they're all afraid of catching the Idiot Disease or the Pervert Bacteria.""Who are you calling an idiot! You rude fellow, Kazuma!"Aqua finally scurried back from the bar, clutching a chicken leg she had swiped from somewhere."Alice, don't listen to them! Joining our party is your blessing. As a Goddess, I can specially allow you to become my number one follower, as long as you offer sacrifices to me every day... Ouch!"Haru expressionlessly picked up Aqua by her back collar and moved her away from Alice like he was throwing out trash.Under the pitying gazes of the entire guild, as if watching a fallen girl step into the abyss, he led this grand yet ridiculous team back through the moonlight to that eerie mansion on the outskirts of Axel.Pushing open the heavy doors of the mansion, although it nominally housed a group of heroes, it was actually more like a den for losers occupied by various strange creatures."Wow! Such a big house! Is this Lord Haru's secret base?"Alice took off her crooked leather hat, and her golden hair cascaded down like a waterfall.She ran around the empty hall like a curious kitten, completely unaware that they had only gotten this place for free because it was haunted."Phew... finally back." Kazuma placed Megumin, who was still mumbling about Explosion Magicbeing art, onto the sofa.However, before Haru and Kazuma could catch their breath, the atmosphere in the air suddenly became extremely eerie.Aqua, Darkness, and even Megumin, who had been half-dead just a moment ago, were now gathered around Alice in perfect unison. Their three pairs of eyes flickered with a light that made Haru feel uneasy in the dim lamplight."Um... Miss Alice."Darkness's face was flushed, her breathing was rapid, and her hands were twisted together in agitation."Tonight... tonight, please by all means sleep in the same room as me! As a Knight of the Kingdom, I have an obligation to personally protect Your Highness's safety! Even if I have to sleep on the floor, or be used as a footstool by Your Highness while you sleep... please entrust that humiliating and sacred responsibility to me!""Get lost, you horny Crusader!"Aqua shoved Darkness aside and hugged Alice's arm tightly, clinging to her like a large ornament."Alice! Tonight you're obviously sleeping with me! I'm a Goddess, you know! Sleeping next to a Goddess will nourish you with sacred aura. Maybe you'll even grow a centimeter taller by tomorrow! Most importantly, if you're afraid you can't sleep, I can perform Natures Beauty for you all night long!""...Too noisy."Megumin stood up unsteadily. Although she hadn't recovered from her mana exhaustion, her gaze was exceptionally firm."Alice is the most talented swordsman I have ever seen. As the number one genius of the Crimson Demon Clan, it is necessary for me to have some... deep soul communication regarding ultimate magic and sword techniques with you before bed. Therefore, Alice belongs to me tonight.""Eh? Ehhh? Everyone wants to sleep with me?"Alice was a bit overwhelmed by this sudden enthusiasm. She looked to Haru for help, her eyes showing a hint of expectation mixed with a bit of panic.Kazuma rested his hands behind his head with an expression of watching a good show:"Haru, it looks like your teammates are already fighting over the right to sleep with the Princess. As the leader, shouldn't you exercise your privilege, kick them all out, and then you yourself— Ouch!"Haru punched Kazuma on the head and then felt a deep sense of helplessness as he watched the three women who were about to start a brawl over Alice.Haru keenly caught Aqua's sneaky movements.This useless Goddess was taking advantage of the gap while Darkness and Megumin were arguing. With a speed comparable to a top-tier Thief, she was stuffing a thick stack of papers smelling of cheap perfume under the pillow of the room where Alice was about to stay."Hehehe, as long as Alice feels the calling of the Axis Order in her dreams, when she wakes up tomorrow morning, she'll be crying and shouting to become my number one priestess. When that time comes, won't the royal offerings flow into my pocket in a steady stream? I'm such a genius Goddess!"Aqua covered her mouth and let out a very villainous giggle.
Chapter 266: The Nightmare of Axel NovicesHaru walked over expressionlessly and, before Aqua could even retract her hand, reached out and pulled the stack of papers from under the pillow."Application for joining the Order: Rule number one, for the sake of tomorrow's meal ticket, please be sure to offer three bottles of famous wine to Lady Aqua every day? Aqua, this isn't brainwashing anymore; it's blatant extortion, isn't it?"Haru waved the papers in his hand, his tone as cold as the rivers of Axel in winter."Waaaaah! Haru, give them back! Those are divine revelations from a Goddess! They are sacred contracts!"Aqua jumped up like a cat whose tail had been stepped on, trying to snatch the papers back, but Haru held her head down with one hand, leaving her to wave her short limbs in vain.Alice leaned in curiously, picked up an application form that had fallen to the ground, and read aloud:"Axis Cultists' Code: If you feel that life is not going well, it must be someone else's fault. If things still aren't going well, then just run away... Wow, Lord Haru, this sect's doctrine is so free and easy! It feels completely different from those clichés in the royal palace!""No, Alice, they're just simply beyond saving."Kazuma rolled his eyes from the side and turned to look at Haru."Hey, Haru, ignore this idiot Goddess. Look over there; those two are about to decide the right to sleep next to her through a duel."In the corridor not far away, Darkness had already unbuckled her armor, her face flushed with excitement."Megumin! Even if you are a genius of the Crimson Demon Clan, I will never yield the sacred duty of protecting Her Highness to you! Come, use your Explosion Magic (even though you can't cast it right now) or any despicable means to humiliate me! As long as I have a breath left, I will sleep outside Her Highness's door!""That's not protection at all; it's just a pure explosion of perverted desire!"Although Megumin was physically weak, she still stubbornly leaned on her staff."Alice, come with me. I'll show you the Crimson Demon Clan's secret Illustrated Guide to Bedtime Sleep-inducing Giant Fireballs..."Haru looked at this group of teammates who had completely lost control, then at the innocent Alice, who seemed to truly find all of this very interesting, and let out a deep sigh.He knew that if he didn't assert his authority as the leader, no one would be getting any sleep tonight.Haru exerted his ultimate authority as the leader (along with a threat sufficient to cut off Aqua's wine money for a month) and finally forcibly suppressed this ridiculous battle for the princess.He personally escorted Alice to the cleanest and most spacious guest room in the mansion, leaving a final ultimatum at the door: anyone who dared to step foot inside tonight would have nothing but Cabbage roots for breakfast tomorrow.However, Haru had clearly underestimated Aqua's obsession with recruiting followers, as well as Alice's innocent curiosity—a blank slate with almost zero common sense regarding the other world, easily dyed with new colors.Over the next few days, scenes that made Haru's blood pressure soar played out inside the Axelmansion."Alice! Look, this is our Axis Order's baptism ceremony! Just pour this bottle of Holy Water (which was actually tap water purified by Aqua) over your head, and you'll receive a divine protection that prevents you from ever being bitten by mosquitoes!"Aqua buzzed around Alice all day like a tireless fly, always clutching that stack of applications that Haruhad confiscated but she had secretly reprinted."Wow! Really? Big Sister Aqua is so amazing!"Alice sat on a garden bench, holding a copy of 'The Self-Cultivation of an Axis Cultist', reading with great interest."If the other party won't forgive you, then borrow money to make them shut up... Lord Haru, I think this rule is very philosophical! When dealing with border disputes with neighboring countries, can we refer to this line of thinking?"Haru, who was wiping his longsword nearby, felt his hand twitch, nearly dropping the sword on his foot."No, Alice, that is simply thug logic."Haru rubbed his temples, looking at Alice's eyes which were becoming clearer and clearer (or rather, more and more like Aqua's, radiating a sense of refreshing stupidity), and felt an unprecedented sense of crisis."You are the princess of the kingdom. If you return to the Royal Capital and your mouth is full of 'running away is shameful but useful,' your father will cry. He really will cry.""What does it matter, Haru!"Aqua stood with her hands on her hips proudly, letting out her signature 'ohoho' laugh."Alice has already learned the essence of our Order—no matter what happens, blame someone else first. Look, yesterday she accidentally broke that expensive antique vase, and now she can say with a straight face that the Ghost Doll did it! This child is simply a natural-born Axis Cultist!""But that was clearly the truth!"Kazuma retorted frantically from the side."And Alice, have you started getting used to shouting 'Long live Lady Aqua' before eating recently? Wake up! Your noble character is being eroded bit by bit by this useless Goddess!"What gave Haru the biggest headache was that Alice seemed to have developed a genuine interest in this stress-free, completely uninhibited lifestyle.She even began trying to imitate Aqua's illogical way of acting spoiled. Whenever Haru tried to lecture her, she would look at him with those watery eyes and mutter softly:"Lord Haru, Big Sister Aqua said that if the leader is angry, as long as you push the responsibility onto Kazuma, the world will become very peaceful...""Hey!! Why is it me!!" Kazuma's scream echoed over the mansion.Haru watched Aqua teaching Alice how to mix high-grade juice with Holy Water, and Darkness, who was biting her handkerchief with a face full of jealousy and excitement because she couldn't join the girls' group. He realized that if he didn't find a way to take Alice out on some proper adventure missions, the hope of the kingdom would likely become Axel's number one problem child.Haru finally reached his limit.Just now, he had seen Alice with a serious face practicing the Purification Purification Aqua taught her on a basin of washing water, trying to convince the water to taste better for the sake of the kingdom's peace. He realized that if he didn't take action, the princess's intelligence level would drop below the Axel average."Enough! Everyone, grab your weapons. We're going to work!"Haru gave the order, directly interrupting Aqua as she was about to demonstrate Natures Beauty."Eh? A mission? Haru, I just got to the chapter on how to gracefully dodge a bill with Alice!"Aqua pouted dissatisfiedly, but under Haru's murderous gaze, she shrank her neck and slowly went to get her staff."Great! Are we finally going on an adventure?"Alice jumped up in excitement, skillfully grabbing her holy sword wrapped in rags, her eyes shining with eagerness."Lord Haru, what are we going to subjugate? Is it a legendary magic dragon, or a Demon Lord ruling the north?""No, we are going to deal with the nightmare of Axel novices, an extremely ferocious, slimy monster that loves to swallow Adventurers."Haru deliberately lowered his voice, creating an extremely serious atmosphere."Its name is... the Giant Toad."
Chapter 267: Aqua, Eager to Prove HerselfHalf an hour later, on the plains outside Axel.Alice looked at the three giant green frogs in front of her, each as tall as a small hill, staring with emotionless dead fish eyes, transparent Slimedripping from the corners of their mouths, and fell into a long silence."...Lord Haru, are these the ferocious monsters?" Alice turned her head, her expression somewhat subtle."Don't underestimate them! Alice, watch closely, this is the true strength of the Sister Aqua you admire!"Haru pointed at Aqua, who had already rushed forward.Aqua let out a confident shout:"Take this! Sacred Punch! Mere frogs, turn into mush before a goddess!"However, the next second, accompanied by a crisp squelch, Aqua's petite figure was swallowed whole by one of the Giant Toads, leaving only a pair of feet wearing blue and white boots kicking frantically at the frog's mouth."Waaaaah! Help! Haru! Kazuma! It stinks! It's all Slime in here! I'm going to be digested! Help!"Muffled cries of distress came from inside the frog's belly.Alice's smile gradually stiffened. She looked at Darkness on the other side, who was trying to catch the frog's tongue attack with her face, looking intoxicated, and Megumin, who could only throw stones from the side because it wasn't time for her Explosion yet."Um... Lord Haru." Alice pointed with a trembling finger at the frog that was trying to swallow Aquacompletely."In the Axis Order doctrines I just studied, it doesn't seem to mention that a goddess would get eaten by a frog...""Now you know, this is reality."Haru calmly crossed his arms, watching his teammates being baptized by the frog's Slime."Alice, if you don't want to become a useless person covered in Slime who only cries for help, use the sword in your hand to show these idiots what a real battle is."Seeing that Alice was about to make a move, Darkness shouted: "Your Highness! Please don't steal my reward! Let this tongue lash me even harder!"Alice, who had been preparing to draw her sword, froze in place upon hearing Darkness's passionate shout.She maintained her grip on the sword, turned her head mechanically, and looked at the Crusader, who was usually valiant and spirited but was now flushed with excitement, actively throwing her shield aside and puffing out her chest to welcome the frog's tongue lash."Lashing... reward?"Alice's voice carried a hint of obvious trembling. Her pure, large eyes were filled with profound doubt about this world."Lord Haru, did Miss Darkness just say that was... a reward? Is being attacked by monsters a pursuit of honor in Axel? Just like receiving a medal in the royal palace?""No, Alice, that is purely a perverted behavior. Please, by all means, do not interpret it in a strange direction."Haru expressionlessly covered Alice's eyes, trying to save the last bit of this Princess's crumbling worldview."That woman's brain is just a little... no, it's completely broken. Just pretend she is conducting some profound and mysterious endurance training.""It's not training! It's a baptism of body and soul!"Darkness's waist was wrapped by the Giant Toad's slimy long tongue, and she was being pulled toward that foul-smelling maw. She let out an extremely dangerous gasp,"Ah! This is the feeling! Being toyed with by brute force from such a lowly creature, and having to display this shameless posture in front of the young Highness... This sense of shame! It's wonderful! Please, harder!""Help! Haru! Is no one going to save me?! I'm going to be swallowed!"On the other side, half of Aqua's body had already disappeared into the frog's mouth, with only her two legs kicking wildly in the air."Alice! Use your holy sword to cut it! Don't listen to that masochist's nonsense! My clothes are divine relics of a goddess; if they get covered in frog stomach acid, they'll shrink! Aaaaaah!"Alice took a deep breath, seemingly having finally sorted out some clues from the chaos.She broke free from Haru's hand, her eyes gradually becoming firm—that was some emotion called justice and pity."I understand, Lord Haru. Although everyone in this party is very... special, as a teammate, I cannot just watch Sister Aqua get eaten, nor can I watch Miss Darkness go further and further down the wrong path!"Alice took a sudden step forward, and the long sword wrapped in rags in her hand emitted a faint but pure golden light."Please step back, everyone! Apprentice Swordsman Alice, engaging!"Her figure flashed, moving so fast that even Haru's eyes could barely keep up.Only a few shrill frog croaks were heard, and the few Giant Toads that had been triumphantly devouring Aqua and toying with Darkness were instantly flipped to the ground by precise sword energy.The plains after the battle were filled with a faint, fishy scent of frogs.Aqua slid out of the frog's mouth, covered in Slime. That raiment, which claimed to be a divine relic of a goddess, now looked like a rag that had been ravaged by a Slime.She looked at Alice's valiant, unstained appearance, and then looked at Haru's gaze full of disdain. Her self-esteem instantly burst like a balloon pricked by a needle."Waaaaah! That doesn't count! I was just careless! It's because this frog was too ugly, it affected my performance!"Aqua wiped away her tears and Slime, stumbling over to Alice, grabbing Alice's shoulders tightly with both hands."Alice! Listen well, what you just saw was just an illusion! To restore my dignity as a goddess... no, as the Archpriest of the Axis Order, I will now show you a miracle that will truly make the world tremble!""Eh? A miracle?"Alice looked with some concern at a piece of frog intestine still hanging from the top of Aqua's head, and whispered:"Sister Aqua, you really don't have to force it. I think the pose you struck when you were swallowed was also quite... quite unique.""Shut up! Watch! This is the ultimate technique that can purify all filth and heal all wounds!"Aqua took a sharp step back and struck an extremely flamboyant and theatrical pose.She closed her eyes, and golden holy light (self-proclaimed) began to flicker around her body, chanting:"Wash away here! Purify here! Let all the dust of this world dissipate! Take this—Sacred High-Level Heal... No, it's Sacred Create Water! Purify—!"Aqua opened her eyes wide, pointed her hands at Alice, and her full magical power erupted instantly. The surrounding air seemed to tremble due to this powerful divine force....A breeze blew by, kicking up a few frog hairs from the ground.Alice blinked, looked down at her completely unchanged clothes, and then looked at Aqua.Nothing happened.Forget about purifying Holy Water; not even a single drop of tap water came out.
Chapter 268: Opening a Door to a Perverted World"Eh?"Aqua remained frozen in that shameful pose, cold sweat trickling down her forehead."Strange, my mana is clearly abundant? One more time! Puri—fi—cation—!"She swung her arm forcefully again, even twisting her waist from the excessive effort, letting out a crisp 'crack'.Still, nothing happened."Ahaha... Um, Big Sister Aqua."Alice scratched her cheek somewhat awkwardly, trying to find a way out for the goddess who looked like she was about to cry."Is it because the air here is so fresh that Purificationis no longer needed?""No, Alice, that's just because she simply dropped the ball at the critical moment."Haru added coldly from the side, casually tossing a rag onto Aqua's face."Alright, stop making a fool of yourself. Your miracle is probably on cooldown because your brain was soaked in stomach acid inside that frog's belly just now.""How is that possible! My magic is perfect! It must be the laws of this world that are wrong! Waaaaah! Haru, don't leave, listen to my explanation! That really was an accident just now!"Aqua completely broke down, throwing herself onto the grass and beginning to roll around frantically in a tantrum.Alice watched the goddess rolling on the ground, devoid of any dignity; she sighed deeply, the last spark of fanaticism for the Axis Order in her eyes finally extinguished, replaced by a sort of world-weary pity.After returning to the mansion, the farce on the plains finally came to an end.Due to that completely failed miracle demonstration and being covered in frog slime, Aqua was currently locking herself in the bathroom, frantically scrubbing her body while letting out miserable whimpers, temporarily losing the energy to corrupt Alice.However, before Haru could breathe a sigh of relief, a new, even more destructive crisis was quietly brewing in the mansion's living room."Highness! Princess Alice! Please, you must hear me out!"Darkness had already taken off her heavy armor and was wearing a somewhat thin shirt. She was kneeling before Alice in an extremely fanatical posture, her hands tightly clutching the hem of Alice's skirt."On the plains just now, the elegance of that strike of yours... that coldness, decisiveness, and the absolute sense of dominance a superior has over lower lifeforms (like me)! Ah! In that moment, I felt as if I saw the legendary Holy King descend!""Eh? D-Darkness-san, please get up!"Alice was caught off guard by this sudden passion, her cheeks turning bright red."I only did what a swordsman should do, it wasn't as... absolute dominance or whatever as you say.""No! It was exactly that feeling!"Darkness looked up, a dangerous light shining in her eyes that would make any normal person keep their distance."Please, you must continue to look at me with those eyes! That sense of contempt, as if this woman is beyond saving, is truly the highest reward in this world! If possible, in our future swordsmanship guidance, please subject me to the most rigorous, unreasonable, and personality-insulting training!"Haru stood at the corner of the hallway, the teacup in his hand trembling slightly.He watched helplessly as Alice transitioned from her initial terror and confusion into a... subtle curiosity tinged with a desire to explore."Rigorous training?"Alice tilted her head, seemingly seriously considering Darkness's proposal."In the royal palace, the teachers are always polite to me; no one has ever requested unreasonable treatment. Darkness-san, is this some kind of special way to temper one's will that is popular among high-level Adventurers in Axel?""Exactly! That's it! This is a supreme cultivation known as Mental Fortitude!"Darkness was incredibly fast to take advantage of the situation, even starting to actively guide Alice's hand to grip the sword hilt."Come, Highness! Please try to strike my helmet with your scabbard and loudly berate me as the shame of the kingdom!""The kingdom's... shame?"Alice tentatively raised the scabbard, her voice small yet carrying a natural majesty."Um... Darkness, you... disobedient Meat shield?""Ahhh! That's it! A bit harder! A bit more contemptuously!"Darkness let out a scream loud enough to make the neighbors call the police, looking like she was about to faint from pure bliss.Haru covered his face in agony.He thought that rescuing Alice from the hands of the Intellectual Disabled Goddess would be the end of it, but who would have thought that this pure Princess would actually reveal an amazing latent Sadist talent hidden in the royal bloodline!"Hey, Haru."Kazuma appeared behind him at some point, holding a bag of dried meat with an expression like he was watching a good show."Although Aqua's brainwashing failed, I think Darkness is leading Alice down an even more incredible path. If you don't step in, Alice might be ordering custom whips and candles tomorrow.""Shut up, Kazuma. How am I supposed to handle this?"Haru growled through gritted teeth."Am I supposed to rush over and say, 'Alice, don't bully that pervert, that pervert will feel so good she'll ascend to heaven'?""Give me a break already, you idiot Meat shield!"Haru finally exploded. He turned into a heartless afterimage, instantly moving behind Darkness. He raised his right hand high and delivered a fierce 'Justice Chop' to that head which was currently immersed in delusions and emitting pink steam."Gau?!"Accompanied by a crisp thud, Darkness let out a short cry filled with a strange sense of satisfaction. She slumped to the ground like a puppet with its strings cut, her face still wearing a broken smile that said, 'Ah, I was treated roughly by Haru-sama, I'm so happy.'"Come, Alice, follow me. We need to have a profound talk about life."Without allowing for discussion, Haru grabbed Alice's slender wrist, ignored her confused expression, and pulled her directly to a quiet corner of the terrace."Um, Haru-sama... did I do something wrong?"Alice nervously fidgeted with her fingers like a child who had made a mistake."I saw that Darkness-san seemed to be looking forward to it, and Big Sister Aqua also said that Adventurers are supposed to satisfy each other's... needs?""Listen carefully, Alice."Haru leaned against the terrace railing and took a deep breath, trying to lower his blood pressure. He looked directly into Alice's eyes, which seemed capable of cleansing the soul, and said extremely seriously:"In this world, there are some people who cannot be used as references. Aqua's needs usually mean emptying your wallet, and Darkness's needs... that is an abyss called a Fetish. If you go along with her, you won't be tempering your will; instead, you'll be opening a door to a perverted world and you'll never be able to come back!"
Chapter 269: Princess Corruption Laboratory"Perverted… world?" Alice tilted her head, repeating the word, her eyes showing a look of pure, unadulterated foolishness."That's right! A normal Princess should be noble, elegant, and beloved by the people, not using a scabbard to hit a masochistic knight on the head and calling her trash!"Haru tapped the table with a pained expression. "Alice, you must remember, a true powerhouse doesn't need to prove themselves by humiliating the weak (although Darkness has high defense, her brain is her weakness). What you should pursue is the power to wield your sword to protect your companions, like you did at the beginning, not awakening strange attributes to satisfy some pervert's delusions!"Alice nodded as if she understood, her expression gradually shifting from curiosity to shame: "I'm sorry, Master Haru... I, I just thought everyone in Axel was so interesting, so I unconsciously wanted to imitate them. So that behavior is perverted? I almost tarnished the honor of the royal family..."Watching Alice finally return to her well-behaved and clever appearance, Haru's tense nerves finally relaxed a little.However, just as he was preparing to strike while the iron was hot and reinforce her education on common sense, a rustling sound suddenly came from the bushes below the terrace."Hey, Haru! What are you sneakily saying to the Princess up there?" Aqua's face, full of jealousy, poked out from outside the railing, holding a bottle of expensive red wine she'd pulled from who knows where. "Are you talking bad about me? I heard everything, you know! What 'empty wallet'? That's called a pious sacrifice! Alice, don't listen to him, come down here, I have a treasure to show you!""Aqua, shut up and go to sleep!" Haru's roar once again echoed throughout the mansion.Although Haru had temporarily cowed Aqua with a roar, he had clearly underestimated the speed at which the virus was spreading in this mansion.Over the next few days, Haru discovered that things were sprinting in another uncontrollable direction.Because Aqua had been grounded in the stables by Haru for stealing expensive red wine (though she cried and claimed it was Holy Water), and Darknesswas hiding in her room, reliving the aftertaste of that hand chop, a vacuum period appeared around Alice—and then, Megumin precisely cut in.Early that morning, Haru pushed open the door to the backyard, and the sight before him caused the bread in his hand to drop straight to the ground."At the bottom of this abyss, awaken, my destiny! Under the baptism of the crimson-black flame, shatter this boring world completely! — — Explosion!!"Alice was standing on the stone steps of the backyard, her originally magnificent sleeping robe tied up with red ribbons into some extremely weird and design-heavy style.Her left hand was on her hip, her right hand was in a claw shape covering her left eye, and her originally clear eyes were now flashing with an eerie light known as chuunibyou.Beside her, Megumin was nodding frequently with a gratified expression, even meticulously helping Aliceadjust the gesture covering her eye."Not bad, Alice! The tremolo on that 'bottom of the abyss' was handled perfectly! This is the ultimate romance pursued by us Crimson Demon Clan!"Megumin crossed her arms, her black cloak flapping in the morning breeze. "Remember, the higher the level of embarrassment of the lines, the greater the magic's power! This is the truth of this world!""I understand, Master Megumin!" Alice's cheeks were flushed with excitement, and she even started trying to spin in place before striking a twisted pose. "Then, should I go find that pitch-black eyepatch sealed in the ancient ruins next? I feel like this power inside me is almost impossible to suppress anymore!""You two... what on earth are you doing!!!" Haru's roar startled a flock of birds.He strode forward and grabbed Megumin, who was preparing for the next round of chanting: "Megumin! Didn't I tell you not to teach her strange things! She's a Princess! If she goes back to the palace and yells'scum of the abyss' at His Majesty the King, this country is doomed!""Let go! Haru, you mortal who doesn't understand art!" Megumin struggled in mid-air. "Alice has amazing talent! She understood the true meaning of the Eye of the Wicked Lord in just one second! This is the glory of the Crimson Demon Clan, a soul resonance that transcends races!""Master Haru!" Seeing Haru, Alice didn't restrain herself, but instead proudly displayed her new pose. "Please don't blame Master Megumin. I've finally discovered that the royal pressure I've always felt was actually the dark magic sleeping inside me stirring! As long as I wear these red ribbons, my mood becomes unprecedentedly comfortable!"Looking at Alice, who had been completely eroded by chuunibyou, Haru felt a deep sense of powerlessness.Aqua taught her to welch on debts, Darkness taught her masochism, and now Megumin was teaching her chuunibyou... This wasn't a hero squad; it was a Princess corruption laboratory!Haru stood in the center of the backyard, the low pressure radiating from him making even Megumin, who was still posing, feel a chill down her spine.He slowly put down the still-struggling Megumin, his eyes so dark they seemed like they could drip water, his gaze slowly sweeping over Aqua, who was hiding behind a pillar peeking, Darkness, who was looking at him with anticipation, and Alice, who was still trying to maintain the pose of the Eye of the Wicked Lord."Listen up, all of you." Haru's voice was exceptionally calm, but those familiar with him knew this was the final silence before a volcanic eruption. "From this second on, if I hear anyone teaching Alicestrange lines, instilling twisted fetishes, or showing off those useless party tricks that do nothing but waste food..."He pulled a thick ledger from his bosom; it was the financial lifeline of this mansion. "Aqua, your budget for high-end Bubbly Wine for next month is completely canceled; you can only drink tap water every day. Darkness, I will suggest to Klein to cancel all your frontline tanking missions and have you return to your territory for matchmaking. As for Megumin..."Haru sneered, staring at Megumin's face, which was gradually turning pale. "I will wipe all your skill points, turning you into a melee mage who can only use a staff to hit Slime, and your daily Explosion Magic plan will be frozen indefinitely!""No, don't do it!!!" Aqua was the first to slide to her knees from behind the pillar, crying with snot and tears streaming down her face. "Without high-end Bubbly Wine, my lubrication as a goddess will decrease! I swear! I will never teach Alice how to welch on debts again! Really!""Wait, wait, Haru! Stopping Explosion Magic... this is a desecration of art! It's a crime!" Megumin hugged her staff tightly, as if protecting her last shred of dignity. "I understand! I'll reinforce the seal inside Alice right now... no, wait, I mean I'll teach her normal magic common sense right now!"Although Darkness was blushing furiously and muttering, "Cutting off supplies, forced matchmaking... this unreasonable sense of oppression is actually quite nice...", under Haru's murderous gaze, she still shrank her neck and honestly stood up straight.