In the corner of the Ambroses' living room was a simple altar of remembrance, consisting of a framed picture, a black urn with a white flower motif right next to it, and a simple incense stick holder to the left and in front.
The picture was of a blonde-haired, light-blue-eyed, young-looking woman with shoulder-length blonde hair, a soft appearance, and a kind smile.
The woman was in a nurse's uniform, a job in which she took great enjoyment and found fulfillment… before she got sick…
…Elise always avoided talking about her mother, Sophia. And I… I guess I always avoided asking questions Elise was uncomfortable with… I felt uncomfortable with…
…I guess I even avoided looking at this corner… especially now that my mother…
…But here I was looking at it anyway. Together with Elise, standing to my left now, grabbing an incense stick from a large package and the lighter lying next to it on the small table. William was standing to Elise's other side, looking with a deep gaze at his late wife. …And intruder Willow, standing to my right, was looking curiously between the altar and everyone else present…
The rest had at least enough tact to head upstairs to get ready for the night, also including the gender-segregated showering under clone protection by James and Willow, like we had arranged previously.
…But the real Willow unexpectedly stayed behind… I didn't sense any sort of intent coming from her that suggested she wanted to watch this… just rude curiosity, which I didn't know if that actually made her behavior worse…
…As long as Elise and William were fine with it, which they said and looked like they were.
And just as those thoughts of mine had finished, Elise had grabbed the stuff she needed and turned toward me.
"Do you want to light it?" she asked me gently.
My eyes flickered between the lighter and stick in her hand, and a somewhat uncomfortable feeling I couldn't identify started to well up in me.
"I don't want to impose. I think her family should do the important part. I just want to say some words to her," I said with a kind smile to turn her down gently.
Elise looked me in the eye for a second, however, and also spoke gently.
"You wouldn't impose at all. …I'm sure she would have already considered you family."
"…Ah."
That's all that came out of my mouth as I was caught off guard, and my eyes shifted again to the picture frame.
…I suddenly noticed that her blue eyes were lighter than Elise's, and her dad's were darker. Their daughter's hue was in between them.
"…Next time. I'd like to see you do it first today," I mumbled while looking back into her eyes.
"…Alright," Elise responded in understanding, and then her eyes shifted to Willow.
"Don't mind me. I was just curious since I noticed the picture. Just do what you always do," Willow answered Elise in advance.
"Al-alright," Elise said a bit more unsurely, but then looked at her dad, to which William gave her a gentle nod as a go-ahead.
So with that, Elise looked toward the incense stick held in her left hand as her right thumb moved and pressed the button on the long-necked lighter in her other hand.
Click
I flinched slightly at the sound and the sight of the yellow flame.
My mother crossed my mind. The moment she was set alight…
I closed my eyes immediately.
Damnit! What am I even thinking about?! Calm down! This isn't the same at all!
…Both our mothers are dead.
Ugh! Stop! Just stop it!
I opened my eyes again after maybe two seconds, and I saw the small flame now licking the top of the stick.
My body hadn't reacted otherwise. Don't shift your eyes. I don't think anybody had noticed me. Don't make them suspicious and ruin this moment.
…After a few more seconds, I saw the incense stick starting to glow a bit.
Elise released the lighter button, and the lighter's flame died out while the stick kept smoldering.
And then, Elise gently blew that flame out too, leaving only a small amount of fragrant smoke behind that the stick now kept producing.
Lastly, with practiced ease, Elise bent down and placed the stick in the holder, while the smell grew stronger all the while.
…Sandalwood, is what the package of those sticks read. …One every day, and she has more of those large packages stored in the table drawers. No wonder we had enough so that we could smoke out the operating room when William had just healed my leg…
Elise stood up again.
…It smelled nice. Like the scent of Elise's house itself had grown stronger. …Maybe with one stick every day, the house had subtly started smelling like it too?
"Now's when I pray to my mother shortly and tell her about my day and my thoughts, so if you'd like to join," Elise said, interrupting my reverie, directing that more toward Willow than toward me.
"…Well, I can think of little to say, so I'll join," Willow responded with a kind smile.
And when Elise looked at me, I gave a kind smile and a nod too as I looked at the picture again.
I pressed my hands together, and, following my feelings, I closed my eyes again to focus more on the smell.
…I wasn't religious. I didn't believe any sort of prayer would reach Sophia. But nevertheless, this ritual had other uses that I did care about. Elise would appreciate it, for once. …And I… I thought it would help me organize my thoughts and feelings too.
So, letting my mind be adrift in the calming darkness, the words I wanted to say surfaced out of my mind, which I sent up to the heavens as they came.
'Sophia… whether you hear this or not, I would like to say a few words of appreciation to you, and a few words to reassure you.
…I'm sure Elise has told you plenty about me already over the years. I don't really know the good things she has told you, but I can imagine the bad stuff about me you have heard…
And that we're dating now, with William's yet-to-be-retracted approval, but nevertheless, I'm sure you're worried, like him, that I would do right by Elise.
…I know I have hurt her in the past. Even though my intention was to help her, I had no right to put her through all that.
…Your daughter helped me see that. She helps me be better, despite my past. I enjoy every second I spend with her. …I find who she is amazing. I'd like to keep being with her far into the future.
…I love her, the good and amazing person you helped raise with William despite your own struggles. Thank you for letting Elise become who she is right now.
…And I promise that I'll keep loving your daughter, as she is right now as well as who she will become in the future. …I'll keep protecting your daughter and her future. I'll make her happy and make her feel loved.
…But I know myself… what's in me. If I… if I can't keep my promise, I assure you I'll let her go if it's better for her, despite my own wishes. I won't let your daughter become like my mother… keep being in love with a monster.
…Like your daughter promised me already. And I… I believe she will keep it should that moment ever come.
…We're in danger now, because of my father. I… I don't know anymore how to defeat him, with the recent revelations… But, however I deal with it, I'll keep your daughter's safety foremost… whatever I'll have to do.
…So, that's all I feel like I have to say for now. If you have heard this, keep watching over her and protect her from above, like William, I, and everyone touched by her will keep doing from down here.
…I'll surely pray to you again if Elise wants me to join too, so I'll speak to you again then. Rest easy for now.'
…I opened my eyes again after a few seconds of nothing new coming to me.
My sight set upon Sophia's picture again, focusing on her gray eyes.
…Wh-what?
"You sure took your time. Well, I can imagine the newly minted first boyfriend would make sure to get the mother's approval from up there."
My head shifted to Willow, who had a smile on her face that matched her teasing remark.
I opened my mouth… but I couldn't think of a response off the top of my head.
So my eyes looked at the picture again.
Blue… they were blue again.
Was… was it my imagination?
"Right on the money, huh? Well, Elise, aren't you glad that your boyfriend cares so much about your mother's approval?"
"U-um, y-yeah, but is… is that why you wanted to join?"
Now I looked at Elise, who was looking cutely flustered.
…Don't think about it. I just imagined it. Put it out of my mind. Focus on Elise's cuteness.
"Well, partly. I also thought you would appreciate it, and it helped organize my thoughts too, which I found nice. So, I'd like to join you again, also so that I won't suddenly get struck from the heavens by lightning."
That last comment made Elise's eyes comically wide, giving her an even cuter expression.
"Pfft, hahaha, that's a good one!" Willow spat out with an amused laugh.
"Sh-she would never! Mom would have loved you immediately, right, Dad?!" Elise immediately said indignantly.
"U-um…"
William, caught slightly off guard, looked at his wife to think about a response, and then came to an answer.
"If she found out you were in love with a boy, I'm sure she would have asked you every day to bring him over for dinner so she could really get to know him."
"R-really? …Well, I can see that, actually…" Elise realized while looking at the picture with a melancholic expression.
"But you're right in that she would have loved Jack immediately… especially after learning that he could cook and why he learned it."
"Yeah," Elise mumbled, with a new smile having formed on her face upon imagining it.
We all fell silent for a moment… before Willow interrupted.
"Hey, I'm really curious. I think this ritual is really nice, but you're not religious, right? And you do this every day, lighting an incense stick and praying. How did you come up with it? Did you have some Asian inspiration, but simplify the altar?"
Elise looked at her, thought for a moment, and then answered quietly.
"Mom always lit incense at the end of the day, because… for Dad… maybe you can answer?" She pivoted to William.
And he, in turn, continued answering with a reserved expression.
"Sophie always lit it so I knew that she wanted me to stop working and unwind. …And we do this because, while my wife was sick, she wished we would remember her when she was at her best. So, we came up with this on our own…"
He started staring at her picture again, but Willow continued before the mood settled.
"I see. That really is nice. I'm sure she's very appreciative from up there."
"…I hope she is too," Elise answered quietly.
…A peaceful quiet returned for a few moments, until Willow suddenly started speaking again.
"Oh… and by the way, James upstairs is just about to finish his shower, and Ken went first and was done in a minute, so Jack or William can go in soon. Although, James mentioned he wants to talk to Jack a bit, so maybe you should go first?" she asked me.
I looked at William after the change of subject, and he gave me a nod that it was alright.
"Alright. I guess James can help me too with the cast and all. The plastic covering—"
"Beth already took it upstairs for us," William answered.
"Right, I guess I'll go first then. …See you afterwards, Elise?"
"Yeah, take your time," she said softly to me while glancing at my cast.
"Jeez. If you're both so disappointed by it, you can head in together and Jack can talk to James afterwards," Willow jibed with a grin.
"I'm not—"
"I'm not disappointed!" Elise screamed out, her voice overpowering mine.
"Hahaha, sure, sure. Well, I would be disappointed if I couldn't see how Elise takes care of herself. I mean, what products do you use for that skin?" Willow continued curiously.
"Huh?! Uh… um… n-nothing special, I think…"
"Yeah? Well, I guess I'll see."
"…W-wait. You're… you're going to watch—"
"…? Of course. How else am I going to keep you safe?"
"Th-that's a bit—"
"Oh, relax. We're both girls, and it's just from the corner of my eye if you're that uncomfortable. …But you did need to get changed in front of me for gym classes and such, right? Are you really that uncomfortable?"
"I… I… that's different from… from… showering!"
"Well… if you're more comfortable with Jack watching over you, he can still talk to James afterwa—"
"No! I mean, yes! I-I mean, both are fine! It… it doesn't matter to me…"
Elise looked flustered and uncomfortable between me and Willow, and Willow looked at me for an answer.
…What a dilemma. Elise was uncomfortable with both options. Was there something…
Oh, I guess there's always that option.
"Maybe you can wear a swimsuit while showering?"
I saw Elise's eyes light up a bit at the comforting idea.
"Rejected," Willow immediately said.
And now Elise and I both stared aghast at her. It wasn't even her decision to make.
But Willow continued talking before either of us could make an objection.
"What? You still need to get changed in front of me or Jack, so that kinda takes away the whole point. Besides, are you gonna be a child about this stuff forever? Not that I wouldn't allow you to wear a swimsuit, but in my opinion, it's a hindrance when it comes to doing what you want to do later. I feel like this is a good opportunity to start getting more comfortable if you want. Don't you agree?"
…That quelled Elise's indignation and made her start contemplating.
…But why? If she's more comfortable otherwise… I didn't understand.
I looked at William, catching his gaze as it moved between me and Elise, but when he saw my confused gaze, he pivoted to look fully at his daughter afterward with some… expectation?
"Al-alright. I-I guess you have a point…" Elise eventually concluded quietly while looking down, embarrassed.
A glance at William revealed a complicated expression, but the small smile suggested that overall he thought this was a positive development too.
"Alright then. Beth's already finished, but the women's shower is still occupied by Cassandra, so we still have to wait a bit. But James has finished, so you can go ahead, Jack," Willow said matter-of-factly.
…I nodded after catching the hidden excitement in Willow's eyes.
…Was this going to be alright? …Well, I couldn't really imagine why not…
"Alright. See you later then."
"…Yeah," Elise answered with a blush, whereafter I headed upstairs.
…And as I prepared to head into the bathroom, I wondered what James had to say to me.
***
Scorching water hit my skin, warming every part of my body.
Except for my right arm, wrapped in a plastic sleeve to protect the cast from getting wet.
The supernatural anesthesia was still working. I hoped it wouldn't start hurting too much when it wore off tomorrow.
But that was the last stray thought crossing my mind, the rest being washed away by the warmth of the water as I slowly rinsed my entire body and hair with soap and shampoo.
…I really was tired now that I was somewhat relaxed again. Perhaps I would have fallen asleep on the spot if not for my brother checking out every muscle on my body.
…Not that I felt anything about it, but maybe I should start wearing a swimsuit too?
…What was he even doing? He wanted to talk to me, but he seemed slightly caught off guard when I asked him to protect me while I was showering, and he hadn't said a word since then.
Maybe I should initiate the conversation then, I thought as I finished washing myself.
I turned the water off, turned around, and stepped out of the shower, catching my brother's eyes as I grabbed the towel.
"So, you wanted to talk to me?" I first said as I started drying myself a bit awkwardly using only my left hand.
"…Yeah, but first, I don't understand. You lost muscle in your upper body, but you kept training your legs?"
…Was that why he was checking me out? …So stupid.
"You know I never liked fighting, right? Or weight training, for that matter. My legs are like this because I do enjoy running in nature, and for PE I figured out that having strong legs helped me get good grades in all the sports, so I kept up doing squats and such, but that's the only thing. For the rest, I improved my flexibility with stretches, so my joints don't get stiff."
James listened attentively and started considering what I said, before speaking.
"Well, you were always an out-fighter and counterpuncher, so slimming down would be beneficial. But if your punching power has decreased… How flexible are you? Can you do head kicks?"
"…Yeah."
Of course I can. Like Spanish… never again…
"A counter-kicker then. I guess that could work, unless you can't keep your distance. I suggest you train your upper body again too so you can grapple and punch effectively after your hand is fully healed."
"…You know I have superspeed, right?"
"And you still got your hand broken."
"And how would more arm muscle have saved me from that?"
"No idea, but instead of dancing around, having the option to put your body close to someone if things don't work out is never a bad thing. For example, if you need to get between your girlfriend and someone else."
"I… I see… you make a point there…"
…Maybe if I was stronger I could have saved my mother somehow…
…No, she's gone. I shouldn't think about this now. Focus on James.
"But that aside, what else do you have to say to me that's so urgent?"
James looked back at me with an expression of having been caught, but I saw his gaze shift to a more serious one as he decided to finally pull the trigger on the subject.
'We're sure the shadow's not here?' he communicated mentally to me.
My eyes scanned the bathroom one more time, which had grown hazy from the water vapour produced by my way-too-hot shower, as James had requested.
And I had not seen any disruptions in the haze or the room otherwise since coming here.
'It's safe. We could continue like this if you want?'
James looked relieved at my mental acknowledgement, and continued verbally, maybe as a sign of trust or because it's easier for him.
"Yeah… I… I'm pretty sure, after all that talk at that table, I noticed something about everything that's happening. But I'm not sure how to best formulate it, or how strong my conjectures are…"
…What was he talking about? Something he noticed and I missed? Was there something? I… I didn't know where he would be going with this.
"Start at the beginning then. What did you notice and when?"
"…Cassandra," he said, looking right into my eyes.
"Cassandra? What about her?"
"Did you notice something off about her?"
"…From the top of my head, not really. Do you mean something specific, or what?"
"Her behavior. I asked Willow briefly too, and she said that you would know better, which I agree with. Really think back since she arrived. Was there anything that didn't make sense compared to the person you knew previously?"
…He's serious. But I really didn't know what I should be looking for. Besides…
"She's always put an act up for me back then, so I don't really have a baseline to compare to. Let alone that she could have changed in those years, so really, you should be the best judge of that. What did you notice?"
"I know. But I want a second opinion… your opinion, to be sure I didn't imagine it. Anything you noticed, I would like to hear."
…I really didn't know where he was going with this, but I nodded nevertheless and thought back about every interaction with her since she arrived. And regarding her behavior, well, I could think of a few oddities that already had an explanation, but I started mentioning them anyway.
"I guess the main thing is that she seemed insistent on defending Father, and her not wanting to falsify reports, but I guess her feeling indebted to him explains that…"
"No, I don't agree. It was odd."
"Really? Why?" I asked, almost in disbelief that James was starting to question someone's loyalty to Father like that. Was his deconditioning going that well?
"If she was completely and unquestionably loyal, she wouldn't have gone behind his back regarding Jane, and would put Father's safety at the highest priority, even if it meant falsifying reports, which is logically safer to do."
"…Yeah, you're right. But nobody behaves predictably all the time. So… I don't know where you're going with this."
"Cassandra does behave predictably about one thing. That's how I immediately noticed and started paying attention."
…What does he mean? …Is… is he talking about…
"She… stopped smoking?"
"Yes, that's exactly it," my brother said in an intense voice.
"…So?"
My brother halted for a moment when he saw me looking confused, then thought and chose his next words calmly.
"When I arrived before you back here, I noticed Cassandra chewing that gum, so I immediately asked why she wasn't smoking. And she said she quit since the Whiteout, together with the rest of the smoking servants, cold turkey."
"…What? Seriously?"
"Yes. I found it odd too, so I asked further. They all just threw all the cigarettes away and went cold turkey, nobody being particularly resistant to it or objecting, according to her words. And the reason was that it would likely become difficult to procure new cigarettes with the world having changed as it has right now, so everyone agreed they should stop immediately."
"Without tapering down or a replacement?"
"No, cold turkey. And Cassandra said it worked, and that chain-smoker quit just like that. But on the drive here she did start getting withdrawal symptoms, so she stopped on the way and got nicotine plasters. She asked me to get the package for her out of the car when I drove it to another place. Don't you find this all odd?"
"…Yes, but… I don't see how this has to do with everything else, frankly."
"Well, I didn't either. But previously, when you mentioned Father and the household being compromised in some way to assist with the coup, I did think of something that explains everything."
James looked very serious, and slightly scared, into my eyes as his hypothesis was on the tip of his tongue.
"And that is?"
James took a deep breath and answered.
"I think everyone in our household is being mind-controlled by someone."
…Oh no. Why… that… that can't be…
How… how could I have overlooked this?
Where… where had I gone wrong?
This… this can't be happening!
How had I suddenly turned my brother into a conspiracy theorist?!