He didn't think, he just acted. He threw his weight sideways, twisting out of Andras's grasp, and rolled straight off Goremaw's back.
He hit the rocky ground hard, tumbling head over heels and tearing the fleece of his onesie. "Oof!" He groaned, holding his aching side, but immediately scrambled to his feet and began sprinting back toward the brawl.
"Avatar!" Zac heard Andras hoot in panic, but Goremaw's momentum was too great, and the warg kept running away from the battle. Zac ignored him.
This can't be real, Zac's mind raced as his slippered feet pounded against the dirt. This is just a bad dream. One of them is pranking me. The angel is gonna die any second now, and the heroic asshole whose dream idea this was is going to come fuck me.
But Zac's mind went completely blank as he drew closer. He watched, horrified, as REPENTANCE turned its faceless golden visor toward the last two standing. It began a slow, deliberate march toward Skarg and Marchosias, who were both still down by the dead Bicorn.
If that thing wants me so badly, I can at least lead it away. I can save them, Zac thought.
He took a deep breath and screamed, "HEY! OVER HERE! THIS TIGHT, UNSOILED VIRGIN NEEDS SOME BIG ANGELIC RESCUING!"
Zac waved his arms frantically. REPENTANCE stopped its advance on the wolf and slowly turned to face him. It lowered its massive gavel and began to walk toward the human, its steps perfectly even and inexorable.
"Come and get me!" Zac yelled, his voice already feeling raw. "Take me to the Holy City! Do whatever you want to me, just leave them alone!"
The simulacrum's expressionless voice played directly inside of Zac's head.
< Virgin Located. New Task: Return To Holy Chapel. >
The android angel was just out of arm's reach when Skarg suddenly jumped in front of Zac.
The wendigo tackled the simulacrum, grappling with the porcelain entity. Skarg struggled, his massive muscles bunching and straining. Zac could see the ice forming around the caribou's hands, attempting to freeze the angel, but the moment the frost touched the pristine white surface, it simply disappeared, turning into glittery dust that floated harmlessly in the air.
Skarg bellowed with effort, his hooves sliding in the dirt. Thick, glacial ice began to creep up Skarg's own legs, anchoring him to the ground to support his weight. Using the extra leverage, Skarg twisted his entire body, roaring as he forced REPENTANCE sideways and slammed it down onto the rocky ground.
"Hell yeah, Skarg!" Zac yelled, his heart leaping. "You're totally getting some hot and sloppy cuddles when we get back!"
Skarg turned back to Zac and grinned, his icy blue eyes shining with triumph.
But the simulacrum didn't stay down. It stood up instantly, completely defying physics, and swung its gavel in a short, brutal chop that hit Skarg directly on the shoulder.
Zac watched in absolute horror as the massive wendigo froze. Glowing, golden cracks spiderwebbed rapidly across Skarg's fur and ice-covered body. With a sickening sound of shattering glass, the Demon of Love began to crack and shatter, slumping onto the ground.
"NOOO!"
Zac closed his eyes and fell to his knees, his hands grabbing fistfuls of dirt. I fucked up, he thought, a crushing weight of despair settling over him. Why do I always have to open my big, stupid, horny mouth?
He pounded his fists against the rocky ground, tears streaming down his face. "Every fucking time! Why am I like this?! I'm so fucking cursed! I belong in Hell!"
Smooth, pristine porcelain hands reached down, sliding under Zac's arms and knees. He was lifted effortlessly from the bloody mud, cradled against the construct's chest as gently as a newborn baby. The simulacrum felt cold, hard, and terrifyingly peaceful.
< Virgin Secure, > the voice chimed in his mind, its tone a serene, unfeeling hum. < Protect At All Costs. Return To Safety. The Blessings Of Heaven Await. >
Zac wept, his body limp in the angel's arms. It was over. They were all dead or dying. His big, stupid mouth and his selfish, horny desires had gotten the only beings who had ever paid him any real attention slaughtered.
He reached up with trembling hands and unbuckled the leather chin strap of his helmet. He pulled the heavy, red velvet papal crown from his head. He stared at the sharp, iron upside-down cross protruding from the top.
I can just end it, as soon as we are far enough away, Zac thought, a dark, hollow numbness settling over him. I've died before. If I do it now, the contract is broken, there is nothing pure about killing myself. Ose gets nothing. The Holy City gets nothing. And I don't have to live with this feeling... all of these feelings.
He gripped the velvet base and slowly turned the iron spike inward, pressing the sharp tip of the cross against the pulse point of his own thumb. He closed his eyes, it was sharp, sharp enough to-
RROOOAAARRR!
A massive, black blur of teeth and fury slammed into the simulacrum's side. Goremaw!
The warg hit the construct with the force of a runaway train, his jaws clamping down viciously on the angel's arm. The sudden impact jarred REPENTANCE, causing its gentle, cradle-like grip to falter.
Before Zac could even register the warg's return, a pair of taloned hands grabbed him by the collar of his onesie. Andras materialized from the shadow cast by the simulacrum's wings, yoinking Zac right out of the angel's arms.
With a grunt of effort, Andras hurled Zac backward. Zac hit the dirt, rolling a few feet before skidding to a halt.
"GET BACK TO LEONARDO!" Andras hooted, his voice cracking with a desperate, ragged edge Zac had never heard before. "GET BACK TO THE KEEP!"
Zac lay in the dirt, the heavy crown slipping from his fingers. He tried to stand, but his legs simply refused to work. They were completely numb, paralyzed by grief and shock.
"I can't!" Zac sobbed, his chest heaving as he stared up at the owl demon. "Everyone died! It's my fault... I'm... I'm..."
Andras turned to look back at him. The cool, detached, cynical pirate was gone. His feathers were ruffled and his golden, unblinking eyes were brimming with thick, glistening tears.
"It's my fault, not yours!" Andras yelled, his voice breaking completely. "RUN, ZAC!"
Andras didn't wait to see if Zac obeyed. He turned and threw himself into the fray.
Goremaw was tearing at the construct's legs, distracting it just long enough. Andras dropped into the shadows, sinking into the earth and reappearing instantly in the air directly behind REPENTANCE.
With a feral, hooting scream, Andras brought his cutlass down in a massive, two-handed, desperate arc. The enchanted steel bit into the base of one of the massive, stained-glass wings.
CRASH.
The sound of shattering glass was deafening. The geometric wing sheared off, erupting into a million glittering, colorful shards that rained down upon the rocky ridge.
The simulacrum froze. It slowly turned its faceless golden visor over its shoulder to look at the missing appendage.
Then, the construct began to glow. Not the gentle, rainbow healing light from before but a blinding, incandescent flare of pure, weaponized holy energy.
A massive holy nova erupted outward. It hit Andras and Goremaw simultaneously, a concussive blast of divine light that swept them off their feet. Zac watched in horror as both the owl and the warg were blown violently backward, flying through the air like discarded ragdolls before crashing into the dirt, motionless.
Zac felt so sick. He couldn't walk. He couldn't move. He dragged his heavy, unresponsive body backward, his leopard-print slippers sliding in the dirt, until the back of his head cracked against a jagged boulder.
He pulled his knees to his chest, wrapping his arms around them, and watched the nightmare continue.