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"Then tonight... let's just sleep outside."
Leo stood in the middle of the ruined, debris-filled farmyard. The acrid smell of charred wood and exploded natural gas still lingered heavily in the cool night air. He looked at his perfectly intact, large double bed that Ran had meticulously dragged out of the wreckage and placed in the middle of the dirt.
He looked down at the four pitch-black, soot-covered Flandres, who were currently looking up at him with wide, innocent crimson eyes, aggressively acting cute to avoid further scolding. He looked at the black cat, Chen, with her big yellow eyes blinking expectantly in the dark. He looked at Kogasa Tatara, who was leaning against a surviving fence post, crossing her arms and pretending not to care about the sleeping arrangements. He gently pushed aside the hovering One-Eyed Xiao San umbrella, who was leaning in far too close, ready to stick out its massive, wet tongue.
And finally, he looked directly at Ran Yakumo.
He rubbed his hands together briskly, exactly like a scheming fly plotting its next meal.
Leo's shameless intentions were blatantly known to everyone present.
"Sigh, I understand. Lord Leo, please change your clothes."
Ran shook her head helplessly, though a faint, fond smile tugged at her lips. She casually condensed a ball of brilliant, scorching golden fox-fire in her palm and threw it with pinpoint accuracy toward a large, leafy oak tree outside the farm boundaries that was glowing with an eerie, voyeuristic light.
Whoosh! The fireball scorched the branches, violently startling a hidden crow that scrambled into the night sky, crying out in a suspiciously human voice, 'Baka, baka!' Only after securing their privacy did Ran transform back into her massive, majestic Great Fox form. With a soft, heavy thud, she jumped onto the mattress, her golden fur glowing ethereally under the moonlight, comfortably occupying a full half of the large double bed.
"Hmm, one Flandre, two Flandres, three Flandres, four Flandres. Good, there's no room on this side either."
Leo methodically picked up the four Flandres one by one by the scruff of their collars and placed them in a neat, tight row on the far edge of the bed, occupying the other half of the space. Now, only a tiny, narrow sliver of room remained right down the middle of the mattress, pressed intimately right next to Ran's warm flank.
"Kogasa goes by the pillow, and the cat in my arms—perfect."
Leo quickly changed into his clean silk pajamas and wriggled happily into the narrow space, practically snuggling deep into Ran's massive, furry embrace. He buried his face completely in the incredibly soft, warm golden fluff of her neck and took a deep, contented breath. The soothing scent of sun-baked fur and autumn leaves washed over him. Indeed, Ran is a character who could be my mother! "Alright, alright, Lord Leo, please go to sleep."
The Great Fox, with a highly suspicious, deep blush visible even beneath the fur on her snout, gently pulled Leo closer into her warm arms. She instinctively moved to use her massive, fluffy tail as a heavy blanket to cover him... hmm? She paused, her ears twitching. She had almost completely forgotten there was still someone physically trapped inside her tail from earlier today at Eientei.
With a sharp, deliberate shake of her nine massive tails, poor Reisen Udongein Inaba came spinning violently out of the golden fur.
Thud! The Moon Rabbit hit the dirt, sliding gracefully into a stylish, albeit incredibly dizzy, three-point hero landing. Reisen stood up unsteadily, dusting off her crumpled business suit, and stared blankly at the crowded pile of people and monsters currently occupying the outdoor double bed. Who was she? Where was she? And what exactly was she supposed to do now in the middle of this ruined, smoking farm?
"Um..."
Reisen weakly raised a trembling hand, trying to politely announce her presence, but absolutely no one paid her any attention. Leo had already closed his eyes and fallen into a deep, dreamless sleep; the magical beds in Stardew Valley were just that incredibly good—you instantly fall asleep the exact millisecond your head hits the pillow.
Because Flandre knew she had caused massive trouble today, the four clones also lay perfectly obediently in a neat row on the edge of the bed with their eyes squeezed tightly shut, desperately pretending to be good, harmless children.
Ran opened one golden eye, glanced at the peacefully sleeping Leo nestled in her fur, and didn't say a single word. She merely signaled with a flick of her ear that Reisen was free to move around the valley before becoming completely still herself, her deep, rhythmic breathing lulling Leo.
"Caw! Caw! Caw!"
A faint, unnatural crow sound reached Reisen's sensitive rabbit ears. Not knowing what else to do in this bizarre environment, Reisen turned around and saw Aya Shameimaru standing in the shadows just outside the farm's broken fence, frantically beckoning to her.
After one last, confused glance at the bizarre sleeping pile on the double bed, Reisen hesitantly walked over to Aya's side in the dark.
"Miss Aya?"
"Come, this isn't the place to talk. Follow me."
Aya made a sharp shushing gesture, her red eyes gleaming in the dark. She grabbed Reisen's wrist and led the confused rabbit as they moved quickly and silently through the pitch-black Pelican Town forest. They eventually reached the dilapidated, overgrown Community Center and pushed open the heavy, creaking wooden doors.
One of the small, dusty back rooms had already been roughly cleaned up and swept by Aya.
This was Aya's new, highly illegal secret base. She saw that the other normal residential houses in town were in suspiciously good condition and clearly meant for someone specific to live in later, so she actively chose to build a squatter's secret base in this abandoned, haunted Community Center. Surely no one would ever come here to bother a hardworking journalist.
"Miss Aya? Why are we here?"
Watching Aya strike a match and light the dusty stone fireplace—though lighting a roaring fire in this mild spring weather was a bit odd, it was the only source of light in the gloomy room—Reisen rubbed her arms. She wasn't sure what exactly the reporter was up to, acting so mysteriously like a spy.
"It's nothing, I just wanted to ask you a few questions."
Aya opened her reporter's notebook with a snap and revealed a completely harmless, professional smile. She had clearly seen Leo go through the portal to Gensokyo today on a stretcher, and she had just seen Ran manually release Reisen from her tail at night. If she were told nothing dramatic had happened between the factions, she wouldn't believe it for the life of her. Her journalistic instincts were screaming.
The incredibly honest, naive Reisen recounted absolutely everything that had happened after Leo arrived at Eientei. She didn't actually know what happened afterward with Yukari, only that Miss Ran's tail fur was actually very warm and comfortable inside.
"Very good, thank you for your cooperation." Aya scribbled furiously in the flickering firelight. "This news piece will be submitted to Bunbunmaru News under your name when the time comes."
She closed her notebook with immense professional satisfaction. As for what exactly happened to Leo later, even if Reisen didn't know the facts, couldn't she just easily guess and fabricate the rest? Being a top-tier reporter fundamentally required bold, baseless speculation. She guessed that something highly romantic and scandalous must have happened between Leo and that ancient woman Eirin, which immediately drew a furious Yukari Yakumo there to intervene. She guessed—just guessed—that Yukari violently stormed Eientei because she was deeply jealous of the Lunar Brain stealing her man. What a perfect front-page headline!
"Alright, you can rest here today. I still need to go and observe Leo, so I won't be sleeping. Bye-bye."
Watching Aya's black wings vanish into the night sky, Reisen sat awkwardly on the crude, itchy bed the reporter had made out of gathered weeds and dry leaves, and slowly lay down.
"Wuwuwu, Master, where are you? And Princess, Tei... I'm so scared."
Reisen curled her long legs tightly to her chest in the cold, unfamiliar, dusty environment, feeling so deeply aggrieved and abandoned she was about to cry. If she hadn't joined the military Moon Rabbit Unit, she wouldn't have cowardly fled to the Earth's surface during the brutal Moon War; if she hadn't fled to the surface, she wouldn't have been violently kidnapped by Eientei; and if she hadn't been kidnapped, she wouldn't be spending the night shivering here alone in a haunted Community Center!
The cold night passed in silence.
6:00 AM.
When the very first warm ray of morning sunlight hit everyone peacefully sleeping on the outdoor double bed, a dark spatial Gap tore open right above them.
Yukari Yakumo stepped out of the void, yawning widely and looking absolutely, physically exhausted, dark circles under her eyes. Following closely behind her were Eirin Yagokoro, who also looked pale and unwell, and Yuuka Kazami, who surprisingly looked to be in a very good, refreshed mood.
"Wake up! Little brother!"
Yukari reached down and forcefully pulled Leo, who was still comfortably huddled deep in Ran's warm golden arms, awake by his pajama collar. She then unceremoniously collapsed and lay down on the mattress herself. She aggressively hugged Ran's massive fox body, closed her tired eyes, and snuggled deep into the fur, instantly falling asleep.
She had just finished an entire, grueling night of being harshly lectured by the Yama, Eiki Shiki, and her head was throbbing violently; the Sage desperately needed rest.
"What did you call us here for? Is there someone you can't handle? Don't worry, I'm a professional."
Yuuka Kazami greeted Leo, leaning gracefully on her parasol. Seeing him standing barefoot by the dirt in his silk pajamas in a complete daze, she couldn't help but let out a faint, genuine smile. Leo looked a bit cute like this, just like a confused Little Fairy who had just woken up from a nap.
"Ah? Ah, oh, the meteorite. I'm asking you to help me deal with the meteorite."
Leo, whose physical body was standing up but whose soul was clearly still asleep on the comfortable bed, was dazed for a long while before finally coming to his senses. He vigorously rubbed his face with both hands to wake up and restored his brain's speaking function, barely managing normal, coherent communication.
"A meteorite? What kind of atrocious thing did you do? And this farm of yours... did it get hit by a Tengu?"
Eirin Yagokoro pulled a small, glowing glass bottle from her pocket and tilted her head back to drink the bitter liquid inside. This was a highly concentrated, refreshing stimulant oral liquid she made herself. Even after attending countless, mind-numbing bullshit bureaucratic meetings back in the Lunar Capital, she still found it incredibly hard to withstand Eiki Shiki's relentless, moral lecturing all night.
Leo sighed and had no choice but to exhaustingly explain yesterday's chaotic situation with Flandre and the meteor exploit all over again.
"You should have gone to the Tengu for this," Eirin sighed, pulling out her smartphone. "If they knew a meteorite destroyed the strawberry fields, they would burst out with 120% of their strength."
Eirin quickly typed out a message to Megumu Iizunamaru. If she could manipulate someone else into doing the heavy lifting, she absolutely didn't want to take physical action herself. Fighting meteors is exhausting, okay? She had respectfully listened to lectures all night; have some basic sympathy for the elderly, please.
"Strawberries! What happened to the strawberries! Where is the meteorite! What is Aya Shameimaru even doing!"
In just a few seconds, the very fabric of space in front of Leo suddenly, violently bulged outward like a stretched balloon.
Megumu Iizunamaru literally forced her head through the dimensional barrier, creating a large, terrifying bulge—much like someone aggressively pressing their face against tight plastic wrap. Megumu's entire face was violently distorted from the dimensional pressure, and with the deafening sound of space physically cracking like glass, she forced her way out of the fractured space and landed heavily on the dirt.
Even though her clothes were torn and her physical body was covered in bleeding, spatial lacerations, violently crossing between two dimensions with just raw physical force was still only a bit of a strain for an Ootengu. Not everyone was conceptually invincible like Reimu.