Ignoring the bleeding spatial lacerations tearing through her expensive clothes, Megumu Iizunamaru stood in the ruined dirt of the farm. Her sharp, predatory eyes scanned the cratered area. Suddenly, she spotted the faint, telltale glint of a camera lens peeking out nervously from the thick bushes just outside the farm's broken fence.
Taking a brutal, physics-defying Viltrum Stance, she used a high-speed Teleport to blink directly behind Aya Shameimaru in a fraction of a second. Before the reporter could even squawk, Megumu followed up with a vicious 'Through the Mud' grapple maneuver, grabbing Aya by the back of her head and launching them both violently high into the air. With a sickeningly fast descent, she slammed the crow Tengu face-first into the dirt right in front of Leo and the others, finishing the brutal, fighting-game-style combo with a stomping 'Give Me a Shoe Shine' attack before calling it a day.
"What did I tell you? Either you and the strawberries both live, or you die. Now where are the strawberries? Look at me!"
Grabbing the dazed Aya fiercely by the collar of her white shirt, Megumu lifted her off the ground and pressed her forehead aggressively against Aya's. She looked like she was about to unhinge her jaw and literally devour the reporter, her expression truly, terrifyingly twisted with demonic rage.
"I... I couldn't stop it. Such a huge meteorite, and I didn't have my saber on me. There was really nothing I could do."
Aya swallowed hard and averted her gaze, absolutely not daring to meet Megumu's furious eyes. But this slight, guilty flinch was immediately caught by the Great Tengu's sharp instincts.
Something's wrong!
A faint, extremely weak, yet unmistakably sweet scent of fresh strawberries clinging to Aya's clothes triggered Megumu's suspicion. At first, she thought Aya had simply picked up the scent while frantically helping out in the fields, but looking at her incredibly guilty, sweating expression—something was definitely fishy!
Infinite Heavens and Earth, Ten Thousand Mile Tracker!
Megumu's nose twitched, homing in on the scent. The scent is strongest right... here. Megumu reached out her index finger with terrifying slowness, wiped it firmly across the very corner of Aya's mouth, and brought the faint, red smudge to her nose to sniff. Her eyes instantly sharpened into slits.
"It's the taste of a liar. With your speed, you could have easily rescued the strawberries before the meteorite hit. You dare lie to me! Die!"
Grabbing Aya's head firmly with both hands, she violently twisted her neck sharply to the right with a loud, sickening CRACK. For a lying, disobedient child, it's infinitely better if they're dead and completely still, haha.
(Of course, due to Youkai durability, this was merely a severe, temporary inconvenience, but Aya immediately went completely limp, playing dead to avoid further beatings).
"Sorry for the scene, everyone. We had a traitor among us, but it's been handled now. Mr. Leo, is there anything you need help with? The Tengu Tribe will go all out."
Megumu casually dropped the limp crow to the dirt and smoothed out her own torn collar. When fresh strawberries weren't directly involved, she effortlessly displayed the full, overwhelming dignity of an ancient Great Tengu. Her regal elegance, the crushing spiritual pressure she emitted, and the sheer, unquestionable aura of one who rules Youkai Mountain with an iron fist gave Leo the brief, terrifying illusion of seeing his old, tyrannical corporate boss.
"Wait here a moment, I'll go invite Shion over," Leo replied, wiping a drop of sweat from his brow.
Glancing down at the limp, twitching Aya on the ground—who currently had two large, muddy footprints stamped directly on her back—Leo didn't have the time to mourn her. He jogged out of the farm and headed up the mountain path to a flat, shaded dirt area just behind the Kappa Heavy Industries office.
In the original game, this specific spot was Linus's home, the absolute worst, poorest dwelling in all of Stardew Valley. But from afar, Leo could see the blue-haired Poverty God, Ishin Shion, diligently cleaning up the surrounding area with a makeshift broom.
Despite her gloomy, pessimistic words from yesterday, she actually liked this quiet place quite a bit. Shion was quite the tsundere.
With a rare, faint smile playing on her pale face, Shion had slept very comfortably last night. Using her catastrophic ability on the Beach had significantly drained a massive amount of her pent-up misfortune aura, so she felt physically lighter. She could finally relax for a while—at least she didn't have to constantly worry about spontaneous meteorite showers or natural disasters appearing just because she stayed in one place for too long.
Humming a soft, unknown tune, Shion happily dusted the canvas of her small tent. But out of the corner of her eye, she saw Leo running over. She immediately stiffened and reverted to her cold, 'don't touch me' expression. This was also to protect Leo; he was a genuinely good person who had given her a massive meal, and he shouldn't get too physically involved with her, or he would inevitably become unfortunate again.
"Are you here to kick me out? I understand. I'll leave right away."
She dropped the broom, her shoulders slumping in defeat as she reached for her chipped begging bowl.
"Don't be like that. Bring on a few more meteorites. I have nothing left to lose anyway, so let's have as many as possible right now. I've found some big shots to carry me, and we really need meteorites now."
??
Shion blinked, completely stunned. Grabbing Shion's wrist firmly as she prepared to leave with her bowl, Leo pulled her back down the path toward the farm.
Shion didn't physically struggle; she couldn't quite understand the bizarre logic of this human at all. She was a literal Goddess of Misfortune, a walking plague, yet why did this strange person look at her with the exact same eager, shining eyes one would use to look at that lucky rabbit from the Bamboo Forest of the Lost? Is this what it actually feels like to be needed?
"Come, let the meteorites fall even harder!" Leo cheered, practically dragging her.
After a half-hour round trip, Yukari Yakumo had fully, greedily recharged her 'Yakumo Ran energy' by nuzzling the Great Fox. Now completely refreshed and glowing with power, she sat comfortably on the edge of the double bed, leaning heavily against Ran's side.
Eirin Yagokoro was crouching in the dirt, curiously checking the cellular growth of the surviving windbreak grass. Megumu had ruthlessly found Aya's secret vault of stolen goods hidden in a tree and was currently sitting comfortably right on top of the paralyzed Aya, casually eating the stolen strawberries one by one. Only Yuuka Kazami was somewhat acting normal; she was standing elegantly on the sloping roof of the ruined Farmhouse, twirling her parasol and peacefully admiring the morning scenery of Stardew Valley.
"I really don't get you. Since you want it, I'll satisfy you."
Glancing nervously at the terrifying, world-ending lineup of Great Youkai gathered in the farmyard, Shion felt a bit more at ease. With these legendary, overpowered monsters here, surely there wouldn't be any actual, permanent losses.
A thick, freezing deep blue aura began to violently billow out from Shion's body, enveloping Leo. Having agonizing experience with this now, Leo instantly lay completely flat on his back on the double bed like a corpse, obediently not daring to move a single muscle to avoid breaking his legs again. Though his mouth was still aggressively running.
"Harder! Use all your strength! I don't feel a thing. Are you looking down on Yakumo Yukari? She said earlier she could block them all by herself."
"I never said that!"
Yukari shook her blonde head frantically, her eyes widening in sheer panic at being thrown under the bus. She was a Sage, a manipulator of boundaries, not a physical brute; she was the exact type to avoid getting her pristine hands dirty if at all possible. This little brother was far too wicked, deliberately putting her on the spot like this!
"As you wish."
Shion closed her eyes and completely released the ancient, festering misfortune within her soul. Carrying so much toxic misfortune every single day was mentally and physically exhausting for her too. Since Leo explicitly requested it, she'd let it all out at once. She genuinely wondered if these few arrogant Youkai could successfully withstand the concentrated misfortune she had carried for a thousand years.
The deep blue aura billowing from her became so incredibly dense it physically turned pitch black, sucking the light from the yard.
Everyone stopped what they were doing and looked up at the sky in unison. The peaceful morning clouds were violently torn apart, and a massive, craggy meteorite suddenly appeared in the stratosphere, slowly accelerating downward. Its jagged surface began to glow a furious, blinding red as intense atmospheric friction generated searing heat.
"Good timing! Shameimaru Aya, watch closely. How can a Great Yokai be hindered by such things? So what if I don't have my saber? True strength always comes from within!"
Megumu shouted, her competitive pride flaring. She was the first to charge up into the sky, creating a sonic boom. Her slender, pale arms pushed directly against the blazing, superheated underside of the massive meteorite. She erupted with terrifying, inhuman strength, the air around her warping, actually forcing the incredibly heavy, falling space rock to visibly slow its descent.
"Get up! No matter who comes today, they won't destroy our strawberry field!"
Megumu's expression turned incredibly fierce, her teeth bared. She was naturally an agility-type, wind-manipulating hero unit and fundamentally wasn't suited for this kind of head-on, crushing brute force. But she had already made her arrogant boast in front of the others, and she knew Aya was watching her from the ground. Megumu was starting to sweat profusely, her arms trembling as she strained agonizingly against the millions of tons of crushing rock.
"Boss, open wide!"
Seeing that her proud leader was visibly struggling and about to be crushed, Aya—who had fully recovered from her snapped neck—grabbed a massive, gold-star strawberry from her recovered pile and threw it with pinpoint, bullet-like precision high into the air.
"I'm pumped! Stop right there!"
As the intensely sweet and sour, magically-infused strawberry entered her mouth, Megumu bit down. She instantly felt like Popeye after eating a fresh can of spinach, or an Ultraman who only knows how to actually play the game once the warning red light starts blinking.
Bursting with renewed, explosive power, a incredibly dense, visible magic aura erupted from her body, completely stopping the massive meteorite's momentum in mid-air. With a feral shout, she began to slowly, safely lower the colossal rock toward the empty fields.
"Is this for real?"
Lying paralyzed on the bed, Leo watched all this unfold, gaining a much deeper, terrifying understanding of what a Great Youkai actually was. This was a solid iron meteorite physically larger than the entire Mine Cave Lake, and she completely stopped its terminal velocity with her bare hands?!
"One can be stopped, but what about two, or three?"
Shion was now floating slightly off the ground in a state of absolute, unfettered full power. Her eyes were glowing with a blinding, deep blue cursed light. She looked up past the first meteorite.
High in the torn atmosphere, another, even more massive meteorite suddenly appeared, slowly accelerating until it crashed violently into the back of the first one, doubling the crushing weight.
"You can hold the first one, but... what will you do about the second one, Iizuna Maru?"
Tengai Shinsei!