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"Why on earth haven't you properly thanked your Sister Remilia yet?! Good children should absolutely be polite and show gratitude. Since you are now supposedly Lady Ran's innocent, new shikigami, you must absolutely pay even more strict attention to your every single word and action in public! Learn more from the good kitten Chen!"
Leo's current, incredibly smug appearance was exactly like an annoying, condescending older relative visiting a struggling family during the New Year holidays. He casually, lightly slapped the back of the tiny Yukari Yakumo's blonde head and immediately began to loudly, arrogantly lecture her.
He didn't even politely look twice at the wrapped gifts Remilia had sent over, greedily accepting them all with one hand while smoothly, hypocritically saying polite things like, "Oh, since you're already here with gifts," and "Oh my, that's so incredibly embarrassing to accept, but thank you."
"I thank you so incredibly much, Big Sister Remilia!"
Yukari Yakumo aggressively ground out the humiliating words through clenched, grinding teeth. She sharply glanced at the slightly fatigued, sweating Sakuya Izayoi standing silently behind Remilia and instantly, furiously guessed that the maid had absolutely just used her taxing time-stop ability; otherwise, she wouldn't be visibly breathing so hard. As for exactly what humiliating thing she did during the frozen time stop?
The custom-tailored, frilly cat-eared maid outfit—maliciously, beautifully embroidered with incredibly detailed Bagua (Eight Trigrams) conceptual patterns that were the Sage's absolute signature—currently resting mockingly in her small hands was the most direct, undeniable evidence of their targeted crime!
"This is simply a tiny token of my deep affection and welcome, little sister Sumi, so please change into it immediately. Otherwise, Big Sister Remilia will be very, very sad about your rejection. And when I'm tragically sad, I tend to nervously look for someone to eagerly talk to about my feelings. But our Scarlet Devil Mansion is currently so incredibly quiet and destroyed, I'd simply have to go happily find my good, gossiping friend Aya Shameimaru for a long, detailed chat about exactly what I saw today."
Remilia's aristocratic voice was dripping with incredibly delicate, sickeningly sweet, and highly affected mock-sorrow, making Flandre—who was happily eating breakfast nearby—violently shudder in pure disgust. The rich milk she had just happily swallowed almost came violently shooting back out of her nose exactly as fast as it went in, her face full of absolute horror at her sister's bizarre tone.
"Halt! You terrifying Big Tanuki! I absolutely know it's you! How dare you maliciously impersonate my arrogant sister?! Where exactly are you hiding your massive, furry tail?!"
Seriously, genuinely suspecting the sickeningly sweet sister currently standing before her was actually the mischievous Bake-danuki Mamizou Futatsui in disguise, Flandre dropped her spoon, jumped off her wooden stool, ran aggressively up to Remilia, and violently lifted her frilly dress skirt to crawl entirely inside! She desperately wanted to see exactly where Mamizou's signature, massive raccoon dog tail was magically hidden.
This specific Yokai's transformation ability was incredibly, terrifyingly powerful, the absolute only consistent flaw being that polite, massive furry tail that simply couldn't be magically hidden. Flandre violently wanted to confirm if there was a massive tail hidden under the dress.
Smack!
"You annoying brat, go violently play somewhere else!" Remilia roared, her sweet facade instantly breaking as she aggressively smacked Flandre on the head.
Clutching her bumped head with both hands, Flandre happily, cheerfully went directly back to her seat to continue eating her breakfast. Confirmed! It was absolutely, definitely her real, abusive sister. This incredibly familiar, heavy hand feel of the smack, this familiar, arrogant roaring voice, and these familiar, childish kitty panties she just saw under the skirt!
In the bitter end, Yukari Yakumo reluctantly stomped away to her bedroom to change. There was absolutely no other political choice; the highly specific Bagua conceptual pattern embroidered on the maid clothes was practically a direct, malicious taunt directly to her ancient face. If she stubbornly didn't change and submit, Remilia would immediately, happily broadcast the massive, humiliating news of her shrinking directly to all of Gensokyo's newspapers! Too incredibly despicable!
"Aren't you honestly, genuinely afraid of something going violently, horribly wrong playing with her like this?"
While the humiliated Yukari Yakumo returned to her room, Leo nervously gave Remilia a quiet thumbs up. In terms of aggressively, repeatedly courting absolute death, this arrogant Eldest Daughter of the Scarlet Devil Mansion was honestly not much better or smarter than the suicidal Aya Shameimaru!
"As I confidently said before, deeply enjoy the power trip first, and worry about the bloody consequences later. She absolutely can't possibly beat me to actual death in this dimension."
Remilia calmly, elegantly drank her hot tea-milk. This level of domination was her ultimate, long-standing dream; how on earth could she possibly give up such an incredibly good, rare opportunity? She had already taken brutal physical beatings from Reimu Hakurei, so exactly one more beating from Yukari Yakumo later wouldn't mathematically make much of a difference to her immortal body.
"Oho! Miss Sakuya absolutely has incredibly great, cultured taste! In terms of designing maid outfits, I'm fully willing to call you the strongest in the world!"
Seeing Yukari Yakumo slowly, humiliatingly walk out of the dark room, Leo completely ignored her pale face—which was currently burning so violently red with pure shame it seemed physically about to drip blood onto the floor—and walked boldly over to carefully, aggressively inspect the tiny Yukari Yakumo standing before him, who currently bore an incredibly, shockingly striking resemblance to a certain famous anime character from Nekopara.
Long, straight black hair tied neatly into cute twin tails, tight black over-the-knee socks, fluffy black cat ears, a frilly, lace-trimmed maid outfit... It's absolutely you! Chocola!
"Stop staring, you pervert! If you look at me for exactly one second more, believe it or not, I'll violently blow up at you and bite you!"
Yukari Yakumo aggressively pressed down the short, frilly hem of her maid skirt with both hands, glaring fiercely and murderously at Leo. Don't be easily fooled by her usual, manipulative flowery words and how she aggressively liked to sexually tease Leo; in stark, biological reality, she was as romantically pure and inexperienced as the idiot Cirno, and it was entirely, 100% just a confident act!
"Little Momo looks very, very cute right now!"
Yuyuko Saigyouji happily walked over, picked up the tiny Yukari Yakumo—who violently wanted to fight Leo to the absolute death—rubbed her soft face affectionately against the little one's flushed cheek, and then gave her a massive, wet, smacking kiss on the forehead.
Yukari Yakumo aggressively wiped the sticky saliva off her face in disgust; sometimes she really, genuinely wondered if her ancient best friend was truly, deeply innocent and clueless, or just maliciously acting dumb to torture her!
"Let's go, let's go! I've got absolutely everything packed and ready in the car!"
Seeing that the tiny Yukari Yakumo was visibly about to violently blow a massive fuse and attack if she was teased any further, Leo immediately, smartly shouldered his canvas backpack to head out the door. He was an absolute master of emotional temperature control, constantly, dangerously jumping back and forth perfectly between the absolute edge of courting death and actual, bloody death.
"This is a massive, pure natural hot spring officially located in the rocky mountains to the far west of Stardew Valley! At the strict, highly funded request of Boss Leo, we, the brilliant engineers of Kappa Heavy Industries, have entirely, massively renovated this abandoned place, completely turning it into a massive, luxury large-scale bathing center integrating premium hot springs, leisure lounges, and entertainment arcades! Boss Leo personally, creatively named it..."
"...Heaven on Earth."
Nitori Kawashiro, wearing a hard hat, proudly led the way for Leo and the massive group of Youkai. Heaven on Earth was safely located directly north of the busy Kappa Heavy Industries construction office.
The absolute first architectural thing that aggressively came into view was an incredibly, ridiculously grand, towering wooden gate. Those cultured people who knew architecture would instantly know it was a premium bathing center; those who didn't might logically think it was the massive, historical Xuanwu Gate of an ancient Chinese palace!
This was also Leo's strict, bureaucratic request, loudly saying that absolutely no matter how the interior was cheaply built or whether it was even fully finished inside yet, the exterior front gate absolutely had to be built incredibly grandly and expensively first, so that wealthy passersby would be instantly interested and intimidated when they saw it.
Past the massive gate were several smooth, polished pebble paths leading beautifully in all directions, with thick, swaying green bamboo planted artistically on both sides to provide shade. There were quiet, winding forks in the road as you comfortably walked, and exactly at the end of the long paths were beautiful, traditional wooden pavilions specifically for resting. This entire outdoor part was meticulously designed with direct, respectful reference to the Bamboo Forest of the Lost, focusing entirely on absolute tranquility and peace.
Then there was the massive, actual indoor hot spring location.
The first floor was the massive, echoing reception hall and the steaming hot springs themselves. In the brightly lit reception hall, there were dozens of Little Kappa neatly dressed in uniforms actively playing the roles of polite receptionists and busy waitresses, working hard for their college credits. Directly behind that massive desk were the spacious changing areas and the massive hot springs, featuring an incredibly huge, steaming hot spring pool and several large, beautifully carved decorative stones placed artistically directly in the water. The white, humid mist rolling off the boiling water was so incredibly thick that looking anywhere beyond ten meters, one literally couldn't visually tell a man from a beast!
The second floor was the massive, luxurious VIP rest area, completely filled with soft massage beds, traditional cupping therapy stations, scraping tools, and essential oil back rubs. All these massive, miscellaneous spa things were specifically, aggressively added by Leo's request.
To achieve this massive scale, the Kappa Vocational and Technical College even aggressively opened a brand new, separate mandatory course for this, highly paying Eirin Yagokoro to be a guest teacher for a few grueling days, quickly and violently training a massive batch of Kappa to be professional massage technicians!
The third floor was the loud, flashing entertainment area, completely filled with smoky card rooms and various classic and trendy arcade mini-games. One could even loudly, happily play a few long rounds of Werewolf or intense Murder Mystery board games at the tables.
There was also a massive, shaded outdoor dining area where dedicated, sweating chefs were aggressively in charge of the hot BBQ grills, massive all-you-can-eat buffets, and woks for stir-fry. It was absolutely no exaggeration to officially say that this one massive bathing center alone permanently employed exactly a quarter of the entire student body from Kappa Heavy Industries! If it weren't for the sudden, aggressive bankruptcy of Yamawaro Heavy Industries providing a massive supplement of cheap labor, Nitori Kawashiro's engineering staff would have been hopelessly insufficient to finish it!
After all, it was absolutely all about aggressively earning graduation credits. Why on earth should you magically get to slack off and comfortably enjoy yourself working inside at the air-conditioned bathing center while I forcefully have to carry heavy bricks and pour wet concrete in the hot sun at a dusty construction site?!
"Boss Leo! This is the absolute, finalized current situation of Heaven on Earth! Do you officially have any further, expensive instructions for the crew?"
Nitori Kawashiro nervously rubbed her wet hands together with a small, capitalist smile. This was an incredibly massive, lucrative seven-figure business deal. Even though Boss Leo was currently, cheaply paying in installments and absolutely still owed the company massive amounts of money, she aggressively had to serve him perfectly well!
"Good! Very, very good! Absolutely excellent work, Nitori! You all comfortably do exactly as you please; I'll eagerly strip down completely first to officially show my deep respect to the water!"
Leo absolutely couldn't wait a single second more to run to the front desk for a locker number tag and happily went directly to his designated private locker room to quickly change. Since he was officially, legally the absolute only male allowed in this entire dimension, the massive mixed-bathing pool rule was truly, incredibly a pity! Hahahahaha!
"Ladies, please gracefully come this way. If you feel your travel clothes are dirty or sweaty after taking them off, you can politely tell the waiting staff inside. We also officially provide premium, same-day laundry services here while you soak."
The polite Kappa receptionist at the front desk smoothly led Remilia, Ran Yakumo, and the massive group of girls directly into the luxurious female locker room on the right, thoughtfully, politely introducing various relaxing spa services.
...The highly specific kind of premium services that absolutely cost a massive amount of extra money.