Chapter 35: The Exploding Balloons and the Medic's Grudge part-1
"Did you... just steal my pig?" Tsunade asked.
"I... I saved him!" I lied. "From the... falling balls!"
Just then, a pachinko ball fell from the ceiling and bounced off my head. Bonk.
Tsunade's lip twitched. Then she smirked.
"You're a weird kid. Jiraiya certainly knows how to pick them."
She crossed her arms. "Fine. Take me to him. I want to tell him 'No' to his face."
I stood up, handing the pig back to Shizune.
"Thank you," Shizune whispered, adjusting her glasses. "You have... interesting reflexes."
"You have no idea," I sighed.
[System Note: Phase One Complete. The Sucker is located. Now for the hard part: Convincing her to fix Sasuke and take the hat.]
[Warning: Orochimaru is also in town. And he has no arms. But he has Kabuto. And Kabuto remembers you stole his diary.]
I froze.
(Kabuto. The diary. He is going to kill me.)
.................
Name: Hinata HyugaShy Points: 3,800.Achievements: Shark Repellent, Powdered Donut Itachi, Pig Cuddler.Party: +Tsunade (Hostile), +Shizune (Confused), +Tonton (Oink).
............
The atmosphere in the small tavern was thick with tension and the smell of cheap sake. Jiraiya sat on one side of the table, Tsunade on the other. Naruto and I stood awkwardly by the entrance, like children waiting for their parents to stop arguing.
"I refuse," Tsunade said, slamming her cup down. "Being Hokage is a fool's game. My grandfather founded this village, and look where it got him. Dead. The Second? Dead. The Third? Dead. Why would I put on that hat just to die?"
Naruto's hands balled into fists. He was shaking. To him, the title of Hokage was sacred.
"Don't you dare..." Naruto growled, stepping forward. "Don't you dare talk about the Old Man like that!"
"Sit down, brat," Tsunade sneered. "Or I will flick you out of the room."
Naruto didn't sit. He lunged. He jumped onto the table, kunai drawn.
"Naruto-kun!" I cried out.
Tsunade didn't even blink. She raised one finger. Just one. She flicked Naruto's forehead.
Thwack.
The sound was like a gunshot. Naruto flew backward off the table, crashing into the wall.
"Naruto!" I panicked.
I rushed to help him up. But as I ran across the tavern floor, my "Coffee Table Sense" malfunctioned. It detected the table, but it failed to detect the puddle of spilled sake near Jiraiya's feet.
[System Alert: High viscosity fluid detected. Alcohol content: 40%. Lubricity: 100%.]
I stepped in the sake.
"Eep!"
My feet went out from under me. I fell forward.
My hands, seeking stability, grabbed the edge of the table.
Because of my Chakra Control Boost (which made my hands sticky when nervous), I didn't just grab the table. I fused with it.
My momentum carried the table with me.
"Whoa!" Jiraiya yelled as his drink slid away.
I flipped the heavy wooden table.
Tsunade, who was sitting with her elbows on the table, was suddenly deprived of her support. She leaned forward into empty space.
The table, now airborne, cartwheeled over my head.
A massive bowl of peanuts, which had been sitting in the center, was launched into the air.
Scatter.
The peanuts rained down like hail.
One peanut, guided by the cruel hand of fate (and the System), flew directly into Tsunade's cleavage.
Tsunade froze. She looked down. The peanut had vanished into the abyss.
"..."
Jiraiya's eyes widened to the size of dinner plates. "Did... did anyone else see that? That peanut is the luckiest legume in history."
Tsunade's face turned a terrifying shade of red. Veins popped out on her forehead.
"You..." she growled, looking at me. I was lying on the floor under the overturned table, hiding.
[Ding!]
[Achievement Unlocked: "The Nutcracker." You have assaulted the Legendary Sucker with a snack food.]
[Reward: 500 Shy Points.]
[Danger Level: She is going to kill you.]
"It was an accident!" I squeaked from under the table.
Tsunade stood up, cracking her knuckles. "Jiraiya. Your students are annoying. One attacks me, the other throws furniture and peanuts at me."
"Let's settle this outside," Naruto yelled, rubbing the red mark on his forehead. "I challenge you! If I win, you have to admit you're wrong!"
Tsunade smirked. "Fine. Let's see what you've got, brat."
............…..
Outside, the fight ended quickly. Tsunade humiliated Naruto with just one finger. She mocked his Rasengan, which was barely forming.
"You can't master that jutsu," Tsunade scoffed. "It took the Fourth Hokage three years. You're just a Genin."
"I will master it!" Naruto shouted. "In three days!"
"Make it a week," Tsunade said. "If you can master it in a week, I will acknowledge you. And... I will give you this necklace."
She pointed to the crystal necklace she wore. The necklace of the First Hokage.
"Deal!"
................
The next week was a blur of training. We found a clearing outside the town. Naruto held a water balloon in his hand, trying to pop it with chakra rotation.
"Damn it!" Naruto yelled, straining. "Pop! Just pop!"
I sat on a rock nearby, watching him. I wanted to help.
"Naruto-kun," I said softly. "Maybe... try rotating it in different directions at once?"
"I'm trying!" Naruto grunted.
He pushed too hard.
SPLAT.
The balloon didn't just pop; it exploded violently.
A wave of water hit Naruto in the face. It also hit me.
I was soaked instantly. My Indestructible Leotard prevented my clothes from becoming see-through, but it didn't stop the wet fabric from clinging to me.
"Oh, sorry Hinata!" Naruto laughed, wiping water from his eyes.
He looked at me. Then he blinked.
"Hey, Hinata... you're glowing."
I looked down. My leotard... was glowing?
[System Note: The Indestructible Leotard has a hidden feature. When wet, it emits a faint, holy light to censor any potential indecency. You currently look like a glowing angel of awkwardness.]
"I... I am fine!" I shouted, activating my Bunny Fists to generate heat and dry myself off.
"Hey," Naruto said, walking over. "Can you try it? The Rasengan?"
.....
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