After that period, when the pandemic gradually stabilized and everything began returning to normal, I went back to the court to submit my documents again.
This time, I didn't hesitate.
I didn't second-guess myself.
My decision had been clear for a long time — only now did I finally have the chance to act on it.
I walked in with a completely different state of mind.
No fear.
No retreat.
Just a quiet, steady calm.
He showed up as well.
But he was no longer the same.
There was no shouting, no aggression.
He spoke softly, asking me to come back.
Saying he would change.
Saying he didn't want a divorce.
Those words might have shaken me before.
But now, I just listened.
Without reacting.
Without being pulled in.
Because I knew… everything had already gone too far.
There was nothing left to return to.
I looked at him.
And I felt nothing strong anymore.
No anger.
No fear.
Just clarity.
I told him directly that I would not go back.
Not because of one specific reason…
But because I had never truly wanted that marriage from the beginning.
I had stayed for reasons that, looking back, I no longer even understood.
Despite everything they had done — forcing, threatening, begging —
I held my decision.
Not for anyone else.
Not because of another person.
But for myself.
Because I knew I deserved a life with peace.
A life where I didn't have to live in fear.
Where I didn't have to endure pain.
Where I didn't have to lose myself every single day.
I didn't want to waste any more time.
I didn't want to continue living in a place where I was no longer myself.
I had gone through enough to understand one thing clearly —
If I didn't walk away, I would never have the chance to live a different life.
In the end, everything was completed.
No surprises.
No last-minute changes.
It ended clearly.
We divorced.
No more ties.
No more connection.
A true ending.
In that moment, I didn't cry.
I didn't feel joy either.
Just… lightness.
A very clear kind of lightness.
As if I had finally put down something that had been weighing on me for far too long.
Nothing holding me back anymore.
Nothing keeping me there.
That evening, he came.
He didn't ask much about what happened at court.
No details.
He simply said he would take me out for a walk.
We went into Saigon.
Drove through familiar streets.
But everything felt different.
No heaviness.
No urgency.
Everything felt… lighter.
We went up to a rooftop.
The space was open.
The wind was gentle.
Not too crowded.
I stood there, closed my eyes, and felt the breeze on my skin.
A kind of freedom I hadn't felt in a very long time.
No thoughts.
No worries.
Just standing there… breathing.
He stood beside me.
Didn't say anything.
Just looked at me.
His eyes were soft.
There was something in them — something like relief.
Like he had been waiting for this moment for a long time.
But he didn't say it.
He just stood there.
Smiling, very slightly.
We didn't talk much.
We didn't need to.
His presence was enough.
The way he stayed beside me.
The way he cared.
No longer distant like before.
No longer holding himself too far away.
But still… never crossing a line.
Everything felt natural.
His care was clearer now.
More visible.
But never overwhelming.
Never pressuring.
Just… exactly enough.
And yet, even then —
I didn't think beyond that.
I didn't think about love.
I didn't think that what he felt for me was anything special.
I simply thought…
He was a very good person.
So good that I couldn't understand how someone like that could exist.
I even wondered —
Why was he like that?
Why could he do all of this without expecting anything in return?
Why could he stay beside me like that… without asking for anything?
And now, looking back…
I realize how naive I was.
I had gone through a marriage.
Through so many things.
Even a divorce.
And yet…
In the way I thought —
I was still simple.
Still unable to see what was right in front of me.
Still unable to understand that what he gave me…
Was not just kindness.
But maybe…
That innocence was what kept everything between us pure.
No calculation.
No pressure.
Just two people standing next to each other.
One who had always been there.
And one who still didn't fully understand…
What was right in front of her.
Message of Chapter 35
Sometimes we think we've grown after going through major life events.
But the deepest emotions…
are only truly understood when we look back later.