Xiao Limo fell into a brooding silence at dinner. He kept stealing glances at me, then poking at his food without eating any of it.
"What's the matter?" I set my chopsticks down and looked at him.
"My lady." The words came out laden with grievance.
"Why are you calling me that again?"
He turned his face away in a pout. "The younger princess said you are her Sister, not mine. But Nanny said you are my wife."
Impossible.
When I ignored him, he slammed his chopsticks on the table with a sharp crack.
I slammed my bowl right back. "Who do you think you are? Put those down properly. If you don't want to eat, get out."
He flinched. Then, without a word, tears dropped onto the table.
Tears on that face — that infuriatingly beautiful, infuriatingly perfect face — produced something I could only describe as ache.
Heaven help me.
I pulled him into my arms. "Alright. Alright. Sister was wrong. I shouldn't have snapped at you."
He buried his head against my chest. "Sister doesn't want me anymore, does she?"
I asked why he would think that. He said nothing, sulked a while longer, and then retreated to his room alone — leaving me marooned in the dining hall, bewildered.
"Xiao Tao, have the kitchen prepare a fresh set — steamed eight-treasure duck, winter bamboo shoots in marrow broth, and lotus starch osmanthus cake."
"Yes, Princess."
I rubbed my temple. My appetite had deserted me. When Xiao Tao returned with the food box, I pushed open the door to find Xiao Limo packing his things.
"What are you doing?"
His gaze flicked to the food box in Xiao Tao's hands. Some of the stiffness left his face.
Xiao Tao set the box down with a smile and tactfully withdrew.
Xiao Limo produced a small bundle from behind his back and planted it in front of me with a studied expression of indifference. "I'm running away from home."
I pulled him to the table and ruffled his hair. "There's a good boy. Next time you plan to run away, don't announce it."
He ate ravenously and pretended not to hear me.
I opened his bundle. Even his packing made sense for a child: it was full of little trinkets, likely brought over from the Xiao Manor.
"What's this?" A delicate white jade figurine — oddly familiar. Where have I seen this?
He didn't look up. "Mine."
I'm not taking it!
"Why were you running away?" I asked patiently.
He wiped his mouth, apparently under the impression I was trying to keep him here.
"The younger princess told me she'd bring lots and lots of men to the house and have them all live here. Sister, Limo is frightened of strangers. Limo wants to go home. But at home they'll stick me with needles." He looked up. "Would Sister send Limo back?"
I raised an eyebrow and let a slow smile form. "Eat your dinner first."
"Yes. Limo listens to Sister." His voice — soft and unhurried — loosened something in me.
* * *
Xiao Limo's eyes were exceptionally clear — clean as winter snow, not a single shadow in them. I caught myself staring far too often.
"Ow, ow, ow — Sister, gentler!"
I looked down to find my fingers pinching his cheek again. "I beg your pardon — how are you always so easy to pinch?"
That turned it around neatly. Masterful deflection, as always.
The days that had yawned ahead of me gray and purposeless — they had taken on a different texture with him here. Something resembling entertainment.
I peeled a fresh mandarin, unhurried, and tilted a meaningful look at him. "Go wash some grapes for me."
I shook out my perfectly unaching wrists. "Limo, rub my shoulders."
"Limo, come sit with me while I play the qin. This dark, windy night was made for music."
"Limo..."
"Limo."
* * *
Xiao Tao had been pacing my room for some time — back and forth, mouth opening and closing, nothing coming out.
I slapped my book shut. "Xiao Tao. What is it?"
She met my eyes with a painful look of earnestness. "Princess, I have served you since we were small. I know your ways. The more you care for someone, the more you..." She hesitated. "...fuss at them. Chase them around. These days, with the young lord, you've been..."
I grabbed my teacup and drained it in one long swallow. What is she saying?
Her voice cracked a little. "Princess, you are such a gentle soul. You deserve the finest man in this world — not a foolish little boy."
I crossed to the window and pushed it open. The evening air came through, cool, steadying. I stood there until my breathing found its rhythm again — then I turned the thought over carefully.
Perhaps it is only that I have never had a man near me other than Imperial Father and the Crown Prince. An unfamiliar proximity. That is all it is.
After a long moment, I pulled Xiao Tao into a one-armed embrace and curved my mouth. "Xiao Limo is not a fool."
She stared at me as if mourning something. Poor, oblivious girl.
* * *
The Longevity Festival came. I brought the prepared gifts and escorted Xiao Limo to the palace for the celebration. When the evening banquet ended, Imperial Father summoned me to the Imperial Study — unexpectedly, without warning.
I had not seen him in some time. He did not ask if I was well.
"Well then. Is the Xiao boy genuinely addled, or is he performing?"
I touched my nose and met his gaze with perfect calm. "Limo is truly, genuinely addled."
Imperial Father fell quiet, thinking. "I remember taking on a son-in-law. From what you describe, it sounds more like I've acquired a grandson."
I had no patience for his amusement. My eyes went cool. "Can I divorce him now?"
He lifted the teacup to his lips. "Not yet. Three more months."
I snatched the cup from his hand. "Why?"
He did not answer.
I was nearly at the door when his voice drifted after me, unhurried. "Shu'er. Remember what Father told you. Everything I have done is for the sake of the empire."
I paused. Turned. My mouth opened, and closed again without a word.
* * *
Xiao Limo's renown as general had outpaced even the Crown Prince's. Trees that grow too tall invite the storm.
The Xiao family commanded a vast private army. Imperial Father feared that a foreign prince with such power might harbor ambitions. But Xiao Limo — he had given everything to Da Qi. Years of frontier service. Blood paid for every inch of territory held.
It was not Xiao Limo's failing. The Emperor simply refused to trust what he could not control.
Lord Xiao had never touched politics. Yet the wall in Father's heart stood all the same.
Xiao Limo had done nothing wrong.
I could not bring myself to stay at his side with an ulterior purpose.