[Back at the Dunphy House]
Gloria had driven Manny over to the Dunphy house, and after he disappeared to find Luke, she remained downstairs with Claire. The two women stood in the kitchen while Claire continued preparing lunch, still carrying the irritation she'd worked herself into earlier while discussing Haley with Phil.
Claire set something down on the counter and continued the thought she'd already been explaining. "Sure. You know, I had a little peppermint schnapps at my prom, but I hid it from my parents, and I kicked my boyfriend out before they woke up. It's called respect."
Gloria had barely been listening to the story. She stood on the other side of the island, gathering the courage she'd been trying to find since breakfast. She'd failed to tell Jay, and carrying the secret around for another several hours wasn't making it any easier.
Finally, she decided there wasn't going to be a perfect opening.
"I'm pregnant."
Claire was still mentally somewhere between Haley, Jack, and teenage responsibility when the words reached her. She responded almost automatically while reaching across the counter. "You're gonna get fat. You... oh! I mean... That's great. It's great! You're pregnant! It's great! Congratulations!"
Her entire expression transformed as realization caught up with her mouth. Claire stared at Gloria with wide eyes, clearly struggling to recover from telling a pregnant woman she was about to get fat.
Gloria gave her a small, uncertain smile. "It was a surprise."
"Yeah, I'll bet. What did my dad say?" Claire asked, leaning against the island as the implications started settling into place.
Gloria's smile weakened. She glanced down for a moment before admitting the part that had been worrying her all morning. "I haven't told him yet. I worry that he's going to think it's not such great news."
Claire immediately shook her head, putting as much confidence into her expression as she could manage. "Ohh, no. Don't be silly. He's gonna be thrilled."
Gloria seemed relieved by the reassurance.
Claire kept smiling.
At least until Gloria wasn't looking directly at her anymore.
//Claire's Commentary//
Claire sat on the couch with an expression considerably less optimistic than the one she'd given Gloria.
"I knew he wasn't gonna be thrilled."
She paused as memories of Jay's historically terrible ability to disguise unwanted reactions passed through her mind.
"And if history was any indication, he wasn't gonna be able to hide it."
//Commentary End//
...
[Rescue Pet Center]
Across town, Mitchell, Cameron, and Lily's attempt to replace the baby brother Lily wasn't getting with a kitten had brought them to a rescue center filled with cages, scratching posts, blankets, and enough cats to make Mitchell wonder whether they had accidentally entered someone's extremely organized apartment.
Lily stood near one of the cats she'd already mentally renamed Larry while Mitchell leaned down beside her. He watched the animal for a moment before encouraging Lily to get close enough to understand exactly what adopting it would mean.
"All right, take a whiff. Make sure you like it, 'cause that's what our couch is gonna smell like."
Lily obediently leaned closer while Cameron watched the cat with growing affection. After everything they'd been through during the failed adoption, the simplicity of taking home an animal suddenly seemed wonderfully appealing.
He turned toward the clerk with the confidence of someone who believed the decision had already been made. "Okay, hi. Yes, we're gonna take this one."
The clerk didn't share Cameron's enthusiasm for skipping directly to the ending. She reached for some paperwork and gave him a patient look. "Oh, I'm gonna need you to slow down a bit. There's a process we need to go through to see if you're a suitable cat guardian."
Cameron's eyebrows rose. After the year he and Mitchell had endured trying to adopt another child, discovering that they apparently needed to qualify for a cat felt personally insulting. "Oh, really? Because I thought the process was, I say, 'We'll take this one.' And then you say, 'Thank God because we have too many cats.'"
The clerk remained unmoved as she indicated the paperwork waiting for them. "No. We need to ensure these cats are going to good homes. That's why we need you to fill out this form, and then there'll be a site visit."
Mitchell's expression changed immediately. He'd arrived prepared to tolerate some paperwork, but the phrase site visit pushed directly against an emotional bruise that hadn't even begun to heal. "Okay, we've just been through a very frustrating year trying to adopt a baby, so... You'll forgive us if we're not really in the mood to jump through too many hoops for a cat."
The clerk looked between Mitchell and Cameron with sudden curiosity. "Oh. Why wouldn't they give you a baby?"
Cameron's face tightened as the question landed considerably harder than the woman probably intended. "It's complicated."
"So are cats," the clerk replied.
Mitchell stared at her in disbelief before looking toward one of the nearby cages. A cat had spent practically their entire visit grooming itself with impressive commitment. "Are they? 'Cause that one over there has been licking itself ever since we got here. Okay, you know what? I can't do this."
Lily immediately looked toward him with disappointment as Mitchell took her hand. "What about Larry?"
Mitchell's frustration softened when he looked down at his daughter, though he had already reached his limit for the afternoon. "I'm sorry, Lily. Not today."
He led her outside before the conversation could become any worse.
Their car waited in the parking lot with the enormous stuffed gorilla and elephant secured on top. Their earlier attempt to sell the oversized baby gifts had accomplished absolutely nothing, meaning Mitchell was now returning home without a kitten and with two enormous stuffed animals he had no idea where to put.
//Cam & Mitch Commentary//
Cameron sat beside Mitchell and recalled the moment with a wounded expression. "Mitchell stormed off, but I couldn't. I had to give her a piece of my mind."
Mitchell turned slightly toward him. "And how'd that go?"
Cameron's confidence slipped as he remembered the direction his argument had eventually taken. "I may have strayed off topic just a bit."
//Commentary End//
Back inside the rescue center, Cameron's argument had somehow traveled a considerable distance from cat adoption.
He stood in front of the clerk with one hand raised dramatically, completely committed to whatever point he'd begun making several minutes earlier. "No, sir! No, she will always be Norma Jeane Baker to me."
The clerk stared at him, having lost track of the connection between Marilyn Monroe and the animal sitting several feet away. "What is your point, exactly?"
Cameron gestured toward the cat as though presenting the final piece of evidence in a courtroom. "That like the thrice-married starlet, this cat is being deprived a stable home."
The clerk's expression softened slightly, although confusion remained visible beneath it. "I'm sorry if you're upset."
Cameron shook his head, unwilling to accept sympathy when righteous indignation felt more appropriate. "You're the one who should be upset, ma'am. We are animal lovers. That cat would've been on the receiving end of affection 24 hours a day. Satisfying its every need would've been our top priority."
The clerk's attention drifted past Cameron toward the window.
Outside, Mitchell had begun rocking the car gently to entertain her, completely unaware of what the movement was doing to the enormous stuffed animals strapped to the roof.
The elephant and gorilla rocked together with every movement of the car.
Their positioning was unfortunate enough already.
The repeated motion made it considerably worse.
From where the clerk stood, the two stuffed animals appeared to be engaged in an enthusiastic simulation of doggy style on top of the vehicle. The gorilla was behind the elephant.
Her expression slowly shifted from confusion toward mild disgust.
Cameron noticed that she was no longer looking at him.
He followed her gaze through the window.
His face changed immediately.
For several seconds, he watched the stuffed gorilla repeatedly rocking against the elephant while Mitchell remained completely oblivious inside the car.
Cameron slowly turned back toward the clerk.
"Okay, in light of that tableau, I would like to take back the phrase 'receiving end.'"
...
[Hospital]
Several hours later, the smell of disinfectant had replaced the smell of Jack's lunch.
Haley sat miserably in the hospital examination room, one hand pressed against her stomach while Jack stayed beside her. What had begun with her suddenly vomiting into his kitchen sink had been followed by enough nausea and discomfort that Jack had decided he wasn't taking chances.
Haley leaned back and groaned as another unpleasant wave moved through her stomach. "Argg! I knew I shouldn't have eaten those sushi rolls."
Jack looked at her with the particular expression of someone trying to balance genuine concern with the powerful urge to remind his girlfriend that he'd already warned her. "I told you, eating raw fish was a bad idea. We aren't cave animals or primitive gorillas. We got fire to cook. So, cook."
Haley gave him a tired, apologetic look as she leaned against his shoulder. "Yeah, I'm sorry."
[A few hours later]
Haley lay back against the hospital bed with one arm resting across her stomach while Jack sat beside her, his elbows against his knees as he waited for the test results. The worst of the nausea had passed, though she still looked tired and slightly pale.
The door opened a moment later, and the lady doctor walked inside carrying several papers. A small smile touched her lips as she looked through the reports before looking toward them.
Jack stood immediately, his concern returning as he searched her expression. "Is it food poisoning?"
The doctor looked down at the paperwork once more before giving them a reassuring smile. "The reports are good, and it's not food poisoning."
Haley let out a relieved breath and sank deeper into the pillow. She turned toward Jack with a tired little smile before looking back at the doctor. "We've been having too much fun lately, so maybe I was exhausted."
The doctor's smile widened slightly as she looked between them. "Enjoy while you can, right?"
Haley nodded without hesitation, clearly relieved that nothing serious seemed to be wrong. "Yeah, who says we have to race into being an adult? Why wouldn't you want to enjoy a carefree life as long as you could?"
The doctor glanced back down at the reports before answering in an almost casual tone. "Atleast until the baby comes."
Haley laughed and shifted slightly against the bed, completely missing the significance of the comment. "Yeah, that's years away, trust me."
Jack stopped breathing for what felt like several seconds.
The hospital room remained exactly the same around him, yet something inside his mind seemed to lock into place with terrifying precision. Thanks to his photographic memory, the words replayed instantly against a memory from his past life. In the show, Haley had said the exact same thing before learning she was pregnant. And Dylan had been standing beside her.
In this reality, Jack was.
His eyes moved slowly toward Haley while his pulse began climbing. Every logical part of his mind tried to reject the connection as coincidence, though the memory remained painfully clear.
The doctor's expression changed as she looked down at the report again. The light humor disappeared from her face, replaced by something gentler and far more serious.
"Actually, we did your blood test since you said you were feeling weak and dehydrated and your boyfriend suggested a full checkup. You're pregnant."
The room fell silent.
Haley's smile disappeared so quickly that it looked as though somebody had switched it off. Her eyes widened while the words settled over her, and for several seconds she didn't move at all.
Then she slowly turned her head toward Jack.
Jack was already staring at her.
--
AN: Claire was right. 😅😅
--
[POWERSTONES AND REVIEWS]...
If you want to read early advance chapters and support me, you can join>:
patr eon.com/XcaliburXc
[I have > 9 advance chapters] > All chapters available for all tiers
+ [The Big Bang Theory: Science, Music and Billions> 18 chs. Early access.]