The drive felt long, almost too long. My eyelids kept sliding shut no matter how hard I tried to keep them open. Every time I drifted off, I'd jerk awake, confused for a second, and the man who said he was my father would pick up the conversation like he'd been waiting for me to reboot.
"You'll be living on our compound," he said after my third accidental nap. "We have an apartment attached to the clubhouse."
"Okay."
"I'll go over the rules and what the doctor told me once you're settled in."
"Okay."
"You'll have your own room," Blaze added from the passenger seat. "Rook's setting it up right now."
I blinked and pushed myself a little more upright.
"Who's… Rook?"
Blaze smiled like he'd been waiting for that question. "He's part of our club. Smart as hell. Quiet. Handles all the tech stuff, keeps everything organized. Basically the guy who keeps the rest of us from running the place into the ground."
Bear, my father, apparently, cleared his throat. "He's my oldest son."
"Oh." That surprised me.
"I… thank you," I said quietly. "For having him help."
My mind flickered back to my old room. A mattress barely thicker than a blanket. The contant smell of bleach. And the quiet click of the lock turning from the outside. At least it was somewhere they forgot about me sometimes.
"I know what you're thinking," Blaze said gently.
"I doubt that," I muttered.
"It'll be better than your old house," he said. "I promise."
He tried to smile at me like it would make something loosen inside my chest, but all I saw was that look again. It was pity. It felt heavy and choking.
I turned toward the window before anyone could look at me like that again. Outside, Ghost rode beside us on his bike, steady and silent. When he glanced over, he gave me a small nod.
I think I like him. He is nothing like the men from Pipe and his men. He doesn't want anything from me. Doesn't expect anything from me. But liking someone is dangerous. Trusting someone is worse.
The second I let my guard down, someone always proves how wrong I was. It happened with Uncle Chad and it will happen again. The road stretched on ahead of us while the bikes thundered around the SUV like distant storms. Each roar made me flinch before I could stop myself.
Pipe, the leader of the Death Reapers, was my father, well, stepfather, now. I always knew when he arrived because his bike screamed down the road like a warning siren. Every time I heard it, dread would coil so tight in my stomach I could barely breathe.
I hugged my bear closer. Maybe people would think I was too old for stuffed animals. But they weren't the ones who had to survive that house. Sunshine Bear was the only comfort I had left. And I wasn't letting him go.
"Can I ask you something?" Bear said from the driver's seat.
"You already are," I answered before I could stop myself.
My voice came out sharper than I meant it to. It always did when I was scared.
"Sorry," I added quickly. "Yeah. Go ahead."
He actually chuckled. It was a soft laugh. Nothing I expected from a man who was as large as his name, Bear.
"How did you get that necklace?" he asked. "Was it a birthday gift?"
My fingers moved automatically to the chain around my neck. The little teddy bear pendant rested warm against my skin. I looked out the window, letting the blur of trees buy me time.
Do I tell him the truth?
Do I lie?
If I tell him… what if he doesn't want me?
My chest tightened until it hurt. Blaze shifted slightly in the passenger seat. I didn't look at him, but I could feel his attention on me.
"I… uh…" I said slowly.
"I borrowed it from my mom." The words came out careful. Quiet.
"I wanted to wear it on the last day of school."
It was the truth. Just not the whole truth. But it felt safer that way. In the rearview mirror, I saw Bear watching me. His eyes narrowed slightly, like he could see the edges of the lie. But he didn't push.
"Oh," he said after a moment. "Well… okay."
He gave a small nod, no anger, no disappointment, but a look that this will be discussed again. Which somehow confused me more than anything. He reached forward and switched on the radio. Classic rock filled the car, low and steady, filling the quiet space between us.
I leaned my head against the window and held my bear tighter, watching the world blur past. Eventually the road turned, and the bikes slowed. And ahead of us, through the trees, the compound finally came into view.