SF Chapter 28: Big Flappy Bastards III
After Alan had gone back to Judith's place, Daniel ended up staying with his brother on the couch, watching a movie.
"What about Desiree?" he asked.
Charlie replied, still looking at the TV, "She had to finish packing her things, since she's finally moving out."
"I'll miss her…" he gave a small smile, a bit too suggestive.
His brother chuckled. "Our brother needed something like that, but where would we find someone like her for him?" He paused. "I mean, without paying her."
"I don't know…" Charlie didn't seem very motivated.
"Danii?" Penny appeared in the living room and saw the two of them sitting on the couch watching a movie.
"Come here, Penny, let's watch the movie together," he gestured for her to come over.
She agreed and went to sit beside him.
"Do you want something to drink or eat?" he asked, wrapping an arm around her waist.
But Charlie was the one who answered, "I'd take some popcorn."
Daniel looked at him, then glanced at Penny, who made a face that said she wanted some too.
"Fine," he stood up. "Just because this is your house." A short while later, he came back with two bowls of popcorn he had made in the microwave.
He handed one to his brother and ate the other with Penny, who adjusted herself, resting her head on his shoulder and grabbing a piece of popcorn every now and then.
Another person appeared. "What are you watching?" Jake asked, looking at the TV.
"We're watching a movie," Charlie answered, then quickly pointed out, "and you're not supposed to be watching anything."
"Oh, yeah." Jake nodded, but made no move to leave.
A little while later, the kid asked another question. "Is that guy a good guy or a bad guy?"
"Good guy." This time it was his younger uncle who answered. "And you're not supposed to be watching TV," he added, without much effort to send his nephew back to bed.
"I know."
Minutes later, Jake was already sitting between his uncles, also eating popcorn.
"Is that his girlfriend?" Jake pointed at the woman who had appeared in the movie.
"Ex-girlfriend," Penny corrected him.
"But he still loves her, right?"
"Maybe," she chuckled.
"Go to bed, Jake," Charlie remarked again.
"Okay." He didn't move at all, receiving a ruffle on the head from Penny.
Daniel shook the lidded cup, movie-theater style, and saw that it was empty. "Jake, go get us more soda."
"Why me?"
"Because you're grounded," he said more firmly, making his nephew go fetch it.
Penny giggled at what had just happened.
After a while, it was Charlie who asked, "Who's that guy?"
And ironically, it was Jake who clarified, "That's the guy he was in jail with, and who told him where the money was hidden."
"Right." His uncle nodded, adding again, "You're being punished. No TV."
"I know."
Then the kitchen door opened. Alan looked at the couch in disbelief and spoke loudly, "What the hell is going on?"
"Shh," his son made a noise asking for silence.
"We're watching a movie," Daniel replied without moving his head.
"Jake?" Alan spoke firmly.
The boy ran to his bedroom. "Goodnight."
"Hey, I'm watching that," Charlie and Daniel complained as their brother turned off the TV.
"What part of 'no TV' didn't you understand?" Alan inquired.
"We're allowed to watch TV," Charlie gestured to everyone sitting on the couch.
"I mean Jake."
"I said, 'No TV.' He said, 'Okay.' I said, 'Go to bed.' He said, 'Okay.' What do you want from me?"
"He's taking advantage of you because he knows you won't follow through."
"He obviously knows us better than you do." Daniel stared at his brother, turning the TV back on.
"If this is going to work out with Jake living here part-time, you have to be an adult," Alan lectured. "You have to impose discipline."
"Yeah, fine, whatever," Charlie remarked.
"No. You're not listening to me. You need to be firm."
"Go to your room and stop bothering us," the oldest one said firmly this time.
"Yes, like that."
"I mean it." Charlie stood up. "Go to your room."
"That's very funny."
"I'm serious. Get out of here, or I'll kick your ass."
That finally scared Alan, who went to his room. The three of them kept watching TV.
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The next morning, Penny had already gone back to her place, while Daniel headed toward the kitchen to get some coffee.
But halfway there, he saw Charlie looking annoyed at a juice box that someone had left on top of his piano.
And worse - when he looked out at the deck, he became even more annoyed at the sight of seagulls hanging around.
"Hey, morning," Daniel said, startling him.
He replied a little moodily, "Morning," and the two of them went into the kitchen.
"Jake!" Charlie called out, noticing him on the couch.
The kid quickly turned off the TV. "It was on when I came in."
"Yeah, right." His uncle snorted. "What did I tell you about leaving juice boxes on my piano?"
"How do you know it's mine?" he asked innocently.
"Come on, who else around here drinks 'Transylvania Goofy Juice'?"
"Good point."
"And another thing," Charlie continued. "Were you on the deck feeding the seagulls again?"
"Sorry, I forgot."
"Okay. We need to talk."
"Love you, Uncle Charlie."
But this time it didn't work on his uncle, who came over and sat beside him. "Look, we don't feed the seagulls because you can't get rid of them."
"We don't leave the doors and windows open, because we get all kinds of bugs and crap flying into the house."
"Okay."
"No. Don't just say 'okay.' This isn't the grown-up telling the kid what to do. This is just two guys agreeing how to live together. Are we cool?"
Jake nodded, "Yeah. Cool."
Daniel laughed and finally joined the conversation. "Yeah, bro, this will not work. Like, ever…"
"I'd prove my point and let it happen," he went on, "but there's a chance those annoying birds would start flying around the house."
"Okay, smartass, deal with it," his brother scoffed, standing up.
"Jake," Daniel said firmly and with authority, startling the boy, since his uncle almost never spoke like that.
Seeing his nephew straighten his posture, clearly expecting to be scolded, what came instead was a complete 180° change in posture from Daniel.
"I bought you an Xbox, plus ten games, and also a Game Boy Advance," he announced.
"Really?" Jake's eyes widened. "Thank you, Uncle Dan!" He bolted forward to hug his uncle.
"But here's the deal," his uncle raised a finger. "If we see you feeding the seagulls, putting things on Charlie's piano, or trying to enter my room without my permission…
I'll take everything back," he warned.
"Deal," Jake said convincingly, before running toward his uncle's bedroom, since he had been allowed to.
[Daniel and Charlie commentary]
The two brothers were sitting on the couch at the Malibu house.
"That's how I handled my other nephew, Luke," Daniel revealed, talking about giving gifts and then using them as leverage to make the kid behave.
"And Luke was harder, since he had this weird attachment to random things. Believe me, I managed to control him just by threatening to take away a cardboard box," he added.
He turned to his brother, finishing, "Now we have leverage over Jake until he's about thirteen or fourteen."
"He won't be living here that much," Charlie dismissed, but then got curious. "And what if we want leverage after that?"
Daniel replied, "we can buy him some magazines…"
The older brother stared at him for a moment, then looked straight ahead again. "Well, that would've worked on me when I was eleven…" he smirked.
[Commentary ends]
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