SF Chapter 57: Premiere
The next day, the day of the Mean Girls premiere finally arrived.
It was almost six in the evening when Daniel, Charlie, Alan, and Jake arrived at the Grauman's Chinese Theatre on Hollywood Boulevard.
"Here are my boys," Evelyn approached with a bright smile, not looking at all like the night before had ended in a dinner disaster.
"Come on, let's take some photos," she gestured with her hand.
But she leaned closer and whispered to Daniel, "After that, we'll take some pictures with the real stars."
"Isn't it funny? I wrote the script and financed most of the movie, yet I'm still a bit of a side character here," he chuckled.
His mother glanced at him from the corner of her eye and replied dryly, "That wouldn't happen if you knew how to behave."
A little further ahead stood the Geller and Dunphy families.
A blonde woman who had been talking to Ross and Monica noticed the Harpers and walked over.
"Wow," Daniel raised an eyebrow, but his older brother gave him a light shove and stepped forward.
Charlie flashed his famous smirk. "Hey, Lisa. Long time."
"Charlie," she hugged him, then gave him a once-over. "It's good to see you wearing pants."
"That's because I was usually without anything, right?" Charlie murmured playfully.
Lisa rolled her eyes but allowed herself a small smile.
Then Daniel positioned himself between them, spread his arms, and looked back and forth at their faces. "Can I at least know what's going on?"
"Lisa, this is my youngest brother, Daniel," Charlie placed a hand on his shoulder, "and the one responsible for all of this happening here tonight," he added, referring to the premiere.
"Lisa Geller," she said, shaking Daniel's hand. "I'm Ross and Monica's cousin."
Daniel grinned. "What a coincidence. So are we."
"We only found out yesterday," Monica joined in, giving Daniel a quick hug. "When we were talking at dinner."
"Wow, so that's why you were asking Monica about inviting someone. And why you were a little nervous earlier," Daniel placed a hand over his heart. "And here I thought it was because of me, bro." He mocked.
Charlie shot him a glare. "Go do your hosting job, Daniel." Then he extended his hand again. "Lisa, want to talk somewhere more private?"
The blonde agreed, and the two drifted a little away from the group.
Still close enough for his brother to hear, Charlie proposed, "Lisa, don't you want to get out of here and go to my place?"
"Charlie," she lightly smacked the arm he had looped through hers. "This is an important day for your brother!" she scolded.
He dismissed it with a wave of his free hand. "There are plenty of beautiful girls here. He wouldn't mind if the two of us disappeared."
[Male Harpers commentary]
The three brothers were sitting on a couch near the entrance of the theater.
"Lisa and I dated for a while. We were doing the circle of life, you know… hooking up, breaking up, making up," Charlie revealed about the blonde.
"Wow, the circle of life," Alan remarked with a hint of sarcasm. "Wait, isn't she the one who lived with you?"
Charlie nodded. "She lived there, she moved out… she lived there, I moved out. At one point, neither one of us lived there. Yeah, that's her."
"And Lisa might be the one I eventually wind up with," he added.
"'Eventually wind up with.' I'm touched," Alan said in the driest tone possible.
Daniel, however, had the opposite reaction. "Whoa, that is huge. 'Eventually wind up with,'" he repeated with a serious face.
He and Charlie bumped fists, while Alan looked at his brothers in complete disapproval.
[Commentary ends]
"Danii!" Haley smiled, already pulling her uncle into a hug.
Her boyfriend shook his hand.
"Hello, Dylan," Dani nodded toward him.
"This is incredible, Daniel. It's like a realmovie premiere in Hollywood," the boy commented.
"That's because it is a real one," Alex scoffed, not having much patience for her sister's dumb boyfriend.
"Hey, D-Movie, D-Mean Boy!" Phil arrived excitedly.
But he was quickly scolded by his daughter. "Please, Dad, can you not embarrass us here?" Haley made a face.
Claire was the next to give him a hug.
"Uncle Dan, why can't I watch the movie?" Luke asked, sounding annoyed.
"Well, you need to ask your parents. I can't do anything," he said with a shrug. Knowing Phil, he would somehow convince Claire later. Especially since Manny and Jake were going to watch it too.
Daniel went to greet the rest of the guests.
"Wow, there are so many beautiful girls around here," Howard said, looking around in awe. "Come to daddy..."
Leonard gave his friend a nudge. "Control yourself, Howard." Then he offered his cousin a genuine smile. "Congratulations, Daniel."
"Thanks, Leonard," Daniel replied, glancing at his cousin. "Seems you heard me and picked a good one," he added, eyeing the black blazer Leonard was wearing.
He had seen Leonard in a horrendous red corduroy suit before, so he pointed it out.
"Do you think actresses prefer astrophysicists? They are stars, after all," Raj commented after shaking Dani's hand.
"Yeah, that joke's not getting you anywhere." Howard nudged.
Sheldon spoke normally, looking at his friends. "I don't understand. You fail with women of average social standing. What makes you think you would succeed with an actress?"
That made both of them fall silent. Sheldon could be incredibly ruthless, even when he didn't mean to be.
"Wow, what a roast," Daniel muttered. "Anyway, guys, I need to keep saying hello." He gave them a quick salute and moved on to the next group.
He made his way to the section where the celebrities were.
"Daniel," Mark Waters, the film's director, called out, "let me finally introduce you to the actresses." They shook hands and walked over to two girls.
"Lindsay, Amanda, this is our screenwriter, Daniel," he introduced him.
Daniel gave a slight smile. There was no doubt - they were both incredibly beautiful.
"Daniel Harper. Pleasure to finally meet you," he smirked, first extending his hand to the one standing closest to him.
"Lindsay Lohan," she replied with a confident smile.
Right after, the other stepped forward. "Amanda Seyfried," she greeted, also smiling, though it was easy to notice the clear difference in personality - Amanda seemed far more reserved than Lindsay.
"Wow, when they told me it was written by a teenage boy, I didn't believe it," Lindsay started, smiling. "Mind if I ask why you never came to the set?"
"Oh, Lindsay, I'm a little timid. I would've been completely overwhelmed by so many beautiful actresses," he said, though his face and body language suggested the exact opposite.
"Why don't I believe you?" she spoke, giving him a provocative look.
They held each other's gaze without either of them breaking it, until a paparazzo shouted, "Lindsay! Over here! One, please!"
Still not breaking eye contact, Daniel said, "Go on, have fun. I'll steal you back later." He smiled.
She smiled back, adjusted her dress, and walked toward the cameras.
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Lisa Geller (Denise Richards) — She was one of Charlie's lovers in Two and a Half Men. She was Monica and Ross's cousin in Friends.
Linsay Lohan and Amanda Seyfried
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