Jay pov
(Reminder: The camping trip near holy saints, curse chocking her section e saving her, and kiezer bringing section e to his house hasn't happened yet.)
I used you and the whole section e knows
The words were repeating over and over in my head as I stated into the face of the boy I loved, searching for a trace of the warmth that it was now devoid of. His face was cold. He was still just standing there when tears blurred my vision.
It was a good thing Jare went to New York. At least he wasn't here to witness this from happening.
"S-so none of it was true?"
I hate this. I hate how I am crying. I hate the fact that I feel weak and helpless like I'm stuck in Jeanna's house again. I hate that I feel like I'm about to break apart even though I fought to build myself to be strong.
He smirked. But this was not the teasing one I had fallen for. It was cruel. It was evil.
"It was just part of my revenge. You really believed it didn't you? Seems like my plan worked after all."
I nodded even though I felt like tearing the world apart.
Don't let it hurt. Don't let them win. Don't let them see you break, that's what they want. I won't give them the satisfaction of hurting me.
"O- okay" I said my voice barely above a whisper.
For the first time since he said those words, the cold and cruel mask flickered, confusion making way.
"Okay? What that's it?" He asked. The audacity to be asking that is actually insane.
I laughed bitterly. This was not my usual laugh. It was broken. It was cracked. It was desperate. "What else do you expect me to do? Do you want me to beg? Do you want me to fall on your feet and ask you to love me? Do you want me to plead that you stay? I may be a fool. I may have made the mistake of trusting you. But I am NOT a person with 0 self respect. I am NOT your entertainment."
I stopped and drew in a long breath. Why does even breathing feel hard? Why do my lungs hurt everytime I draw in air?
"You wanted to see me hurting? Congratulations. You won. Are you happy now?"
"Very much so"
I stopped dead in my tracks. It felt like all the air was being squeezed out of my lungs. Then my expression changed entirely to one of cold indifference. I slipped into the mask of the woman I was in the real world. The girl who fought to live was gone. This was the girl who lived to fight.
"You don't understand, do you?" I shook my head. "You wanted to see me break? I was aldready broken."
I turned to face the rest of section e. "Why?" My voice cracked slightly. "What did I ever do to guys? Is this the gift I get for helping you? For trusting you? For believing you?"
Ci n stepped forward. He was crying. "Jay, we're sorry. We didn't-"
"Sorry? You're sorry? Don't do that. You don't get to cry when I lost all my friends. I saw you as my brother. Thank you for returning my trust. Truly. You're all saints. You're all so smart aren't you? I'm the dumb one here."
I didn't wait around to hear another round of their excuses. I turned around and stormed off. Yuri tried to stop me. Drew tried to stop me. I pushed through them like they didn't even exist, then I ran. I didn't even know where I was going. All I knew was that if I stayed there for one more second- I would fall apart. So I ran straight out of the building, out of the school. I didn't stop untill my legs ached. Until my breathing turned uneven. Until I couldn't even walk anymore.
When I finally stopped to look around, I realised that even if my heart was broken, my mind had brought me to a place I recognised all too well. The gym. And this wasn't just a normal, random gym. It was mine. I own a few other things besides my law firm (jjm empire).
Nobody dared to question me as I stormed in and made a bee line straight to the boxing ground.
I designed it specifically for training purposes. There was a boxing ground, a shooting arena, a combat ring. Everything. I went straight to the punching bag and beat the hell out it. I punched it like I was fighting- not for my life- but my life itself. And, in a way, I was.
Author pov
The bag broke. Within seconds an assistant had replaced it. Because when Jasper Jean Mariano got angry, no one dares to question her. They knew better. And when she was in a frenzy, NOBODY dared to calm her down. No one could, even if they tried.
"I need to be alone. Clear out the place. Don't, at any cost, let anyone in. Please."
The please frightened the worker even more. Because that meant she had reached her limit. He nodded quickly and scurried away. She heard a sharp click sound and the sounds of the outside world was drowned away.
She kept throwing punches, kept replacing, and continued again, unaware of the storm waiting to unwield back at the Fernandez house.
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