After the Unluckies left with Lassoo, I silently excused myself from Cross and Lee's presence. I needed a walk, needed to clear my head. Why? I wasn't sure, exactly. Just that, despite my antics with the foghorn, I was suddenly not in the best of moods. I think maybe I was a little jealous…As everyone was reuniting with their loved ones all over the Thousand Sunny, a heavy feeling was growing in my chest. It distracted me. I didn't notice someone was approaching me until I'd practically walked into them, twisting out of the way at the last moment when I caught a glimpse of pale blue hair.
"Sorry, your highness."
"Actually, Jones, you're just who I was looking for." The princess smiled at me. Oh. Not my Vivi, then. "Look, I know you're probably not too pleased with me- and after spending ten minutes with the version of me you've had to deal with, I understand completely- but I was wondering if you'd consent to a friendly spar. No powers, no Ruatha or Carue- just our weapons."
That actually sounded like a lot of fun. Still, while my Vivi had been getting better as of late, I was slow to trust anyone who shared her face, at least in terms of motivations relating to myself. "Sounds great, but why?"
TB! Vivi's eye twitched; her fingers tightened around chains I could've sworn she wasn't holding a moment before. "Because, to reiterate, I just met with your version of myself in all her suicidally naïve glory, and as a result, I have an incredible amount of frustration with that girl, and I'm guessing you do too. This way, we can work off some of the shared tension and my newfound self-loathing before one or both of us does something we regret that will most likely land me in intensive psychotherapy with my Chopper for a month."
Well, that was a pretty good reason. I nodded and shifted back into a fighting stance. "Sure, then. Let's go."
"Excellent." And just like that, Vivi was racing towards me, her Lion Cutters starting to spin. I automatically blocked her first strike as I rotated into a round kick, only to have the chain wrap around my forearm. The blade itself continued around and drew a shallow line across my clavicle, carried by its momentum. And while I got in a decent kick at Vivi's side, making her wheeze and stagger, this left me in a very bad position.
Namely, I was trapped.
Bringing my foot back down and planting it, I heaved back on the chain with all my might. This brought Vivi flying towards me. Normally, having my opponent's center of balance would've been a good thing. But before I could do anything with it, I saw a second chain swinging around towards me- and my tug had given the princess's attack extra momentum. I scrambled to draw one of my sais and get it up to block; it was ripped out of my hand a second later, flung across the deck by whipping chains.
"You're strong," Vivi said as she regained her balance. "But slow." The princess spun her second Lion Cutter at me again, forcing me to duck at the last second. I barely made it; the strike clipped the brim of my hat and knocked it off my head.
"And you're quick, but if I get a hit in… TAI!" My abrupt switch from speaking to kiai startled Vivi into stepping back. This wasn't great for me, since her weapons gave her a longer reach, but it didn't matter much- her Lion Cutter may have trapped my arm, but that meant she couldn't go very far from me either, not unless she wanted to give up that potential advantage.
Of course, I didn't just kiai; that would've been stupid. As Vivi was stepping back, I drove in with a three-level punch- face, throat, sternum. The princess dodged the first two, but the third caught her. Even as she wheezed, though, she took the opportunity to entangle my free arm with her second Lion Cutter. I growled. This close in, I couldn't get off a decent kick, and now my arm mobility was severely limited. Damn flail weapons… How was I supposed to counter their ability to wrap around everything? I'd never learned techniques for that.
Well, there was nothing to lose by screwing up here- that's what sparring was for. So I dropped my weight and rolled backwards, shoving my feet up into Vivi's stomach as I fell. The princess coughed and flipped over me with the force of my throw, as had so many sparring partners in the past- and then kept going with a dancer's grace, coming to her feet with a slight stagger, her face an inch from the mast. Then she reversed, rolling back towards me to plant a foot on my stomach before I could get up. It didn't hurt, but it left me in a very awkward position.
"Yield?" she asked, stepping to the side to let me breathe and answer. My crazy grin appeared with a hissed intake of breath.
"Sesehihihihihi! Not even close!" It hurt my shoulders- they weren't supposed to bend quite that way, especially under pressure- but I heaved on the chains again, forcing Vivi to roll down and across. I used the momentum to twist to my feet. The princess came up with me.
A flick of Vivi's wrist freed one of my arms, plus her corresponding Lion Cutter. The princess sliced down on an angle as I drove in with a reverse punch; the chain wrapped around my shoulder, bruising, while the blade stung my lower back. Once more, my punch made Vivi wheeze and stagger. I pivoted on one leg, heaving on my still-trapped arm, desperate to get the princess into position for a good kick. Only, I'd forgotten that doing so only gave her more momentum to use in her own attacks. Cold metal wrapped twice around my throat, the blade coming to rest at my spine with another slight sting.
"How about now?" Vivi's voice was practically right in my ear. I reached up stiffly to tug at the chain around my neck. No slack whatsoever, although it wasn't exactly tight either.
"Fine. I yield."
Steel links unwound from my windpipe. Vivi stepped back, looking slightly worn and ruffled, but quite pleased. "Thank you for that. I feel somewhat better now…" she trailed off before sighing despondently. "For all that wanting to merely throttle my duplicate is an improvement over wanting to scalp her, but still, thank you."
"No problem." I examined the shallow cuts I'd gained, but none of them were in need of immediate attention. Satisfied, I turned and raised an eyebrow at the princess. "Now, if you don't mind me asking- why didn't you use that Sovereign Will thing on me the first time? You could've made me surrender immediately."
"Two reasons." Vivi brushed a few loose hairs back into place. "One, I did say no powers- that goes for me as much as for you, even if mine aren't from a Devil Fruit. And two… No, I couldn't have. Sovereign Will requires that you respect me in order for it to work, and seeing the version of me you've had to put up with, I highly doubt that's the case."
"Well, in that case, you'd be wrong." I retrieved my lost sai, slipping it back into place beside its mate. Vivi shot me an incredulous look.
"You respe- how? I was only with her for ten minutes, and she was acting like- just how?"
I shrugged. "After some of the people I've known, it takes a lot to lose my respect. And even if I don't agree with her, I understand at least part of where she's coming from. It hurts a little, but I'm used to it. Plus, I know you're one of the strongest versions of yourself- emotionally, as well as combat-wise- to exist in the multiverse, so I might do what you said even without Sovereign Will. Might- I don't like taking orders. Buuut anyways…" Here I let my grin take over again. "Up for a round two? I'd like to play around a bit, see if I can figure out some counters to your Lion Cutters. I've never had a chance to fight someone who uses flail-type weapons before. Plus, I've been in the mood for a good fight or six ever since a certain armoured idiot, and I got chased across the wild blue yonder by the giant Nemo slayer."
Vivi hesitated before shaking her head with a smile. "As much as I would like to oblige, I should probably be getting back to my mother. I left her with my counterpart in the hopes that it would help the latter adjust, but…"
"Understood. I hope you enjoy the rest of your visit with your mom." I bowed- and then automatically snapped a salute when I straightened. Since the first motion was Japanese in style, and the second British, I assume I looked rather silly. Vivi certainly thought so, stifling a giggle at my actions.
"Thank you, Jones. And I hope you enjoy getting to see your…" She trailed off, uncertain. I waved her off.
"Don't worry about me. Just having everyone together like this is enough. Interesting, fun, makes my friends happy- what more could I ask for?"
"If you're sure." Vivi stared at me briefly before making her way back towards wherever she'd left Nefertari Titi and my own princess.
Happy and loose after my bout with Vivi, I wandered over and flopped down back near Cross and Lee, where they were looking over the various scenes with contented smiles. Watching them together made me frown as I came to a slow realization. "Hey… If you're both here… When's the third member of the Cross-Brain showing up? Shouldn't he be around somewhere?"
Both turned to look at me- Cross with shock, Lee with amusement.
"Well—"
"Third?! Cross-Brain?! What?!"
Grinning now even wider, Lee waved his hand. "No, go ahead, Xom, get it out of your system."
"Where do I even start!?" he sputtered, eyes wide in shock. "The fact that I actually have a second friend as good as you, or the fact that we've actually managed to stick together long enough that we've actually got a group name going!? Are… we sure we're not talking about some freaky adjacent Earth me or some—GAH!" Cross suddenly started clawing at his skull with a growl of agony.
"I don't think that's ever going to get—YOW!" Lee blinked, rubbing his temples.
Then, just as swiftly as their fits came over them, my seniors swiftly relaxed, albeit with far-off looks in their eyes.
"…two things," Cross deadpanned, his eyelid twitching menacingly. "First, one day I will find a way to shove that omni-everything bastard's Möbius loop of a skull inside his fourth-dimensional ass. And second… I, one of the biggest Leeroy Jenkins in the history of fiction, have a cowriter named The Patient One. I've been on these seas almost a year, and I think that's insane."
"Seconded, and I've heard MORE INSANITY SINCE I MET YOU than most people ever do," Soundbite said in the same tone.
"Yes, you do have a cowriter named The Patient One. And he milks that name for all the puns he can produce," Lee stated, just as flat. "As for BROB, if I ever find that asshole, I'm going to give him a FOOF enema. Still…" The older Stand-user rubbed his chin contemplatively. "Assuming his plans went through, he was inserted into Yu-Gi-Oh!, and I wish him good luck."
"Oh." I felt a twinge of disappointment. It would've been awesome to meet three of the greatest fanfic writers from when I was reading. About to apologize for bringing it up, I froze as the disappointment was followed up by another, stranger sensation. It felt like someone was standing behind me, close; I could feel warmth at my back. And arms… Like someone was hugging me from behind. Except it didn't make me feel anxious, for once. Instead, I felt protected. Wanted. The feeling faded slowly, leaving me confused… and wishing a little for its return.
"One more thing," Lee continued, holding up a finger. "We have how many favourites and reviews?!"
"IS IT over 9000?!" Soundbite chortled.
Cross wound up to dopeslap his partner's shell…
"Eh, with enough time…" I grinned as I waved my hand back and forth.
And there was the pole-axed look I'd been looking for. "That popular?!" he choked out, and I noticed Lee being equally attentive.
"Put it this way," I spread my arms demonstratively. "You're the Sword of Shannara of the One Piece fandom!" I waited and… jack squat. I matched their blank looks with one of my own. "Seriously? I thought you guys were readers."
"We are!" Cross protested before coughing sheepishly. "Just… not in this case, you know?"
"Ditto, though in my defense the world I was punted into was divergent enough that I doubt it had that book either," Lee shrugged indifferently. "So what's the significance of that reference exactly?"
"Well—!" I started to explain.
"Massively popular novel that proved that THE FANTASY GENRE HAD WORTH beyond Tolkien's Lord of the Rings," Soundbite fell silent for a bit… before scowling irritably at our dumbstruck looks. "HEY, I CAN LISTEN AND GET USEFUL INTEL OFF THE INTERWEBS! I don't do it often, sure, BUT IT HAPPENS!"
"Yeah, once in a blue moon when pigs spontaneously grow wings and fly over Satan skating to work," Lee snarked.
"AS I SAID, not often," the little pest shrugged, inasmuch as he could. "OH, AND BY THE WAY? The scouts are all COMING BACK."
"GIVE IT A REST ALREADY!" Boss's voice roared out of nowhere. I looked around and saw him coming to a stop on the far side of the ship. The TDWS appeared a moment later—and I dreaded to ask what in the world Boss had done, because he and they were effectively re-enacting Jurassic World's raptor scene, only those four were glaring him down with the kind of sadistic anticipation that I'd only seen in the story before the crew started beating down Oars while he was stuck.
"I'd suggest begging for mercy, Boss!" Cross called over with an ill-hidden snicker.
"A REAL MAN NEVER BEGS FOR HIS OWN LIFE!" the wizened dugong roared indignantly.
SHINK!
He then froze as he found Leo's blade stuck clean in the middle of his face. "He does, however," he amended calmly. "Know when to perform a tactical retreat." And with that, the Dugongs fell into the water, kicking up a frothing mess around the Sunny and Merry the Younger.
"Fare thee well, Boss," Cross saluted the poor bastard sarcastically.
"I AIN'T DEAD YET, YOU SONNUVA—GAH!"
"No, but you will be soon enough…" Cross snickered, watching the bash go on for a bit…
BOOM!
Before glancing up with interest as a few of the wrecks in the distance started to shift, some from explosions and others from sliding apart. "Ah, looks like Chopper and Zoro are on their way back."
"Guess they must have found Hiruluk and Kuina," I deduced. "Wonder if Johnny and Yosaku are with them."
"Oh, so you dropped in early enough to pick up the cleaver twins?" Cross asked with interest. "Huh, a bit cliché, but I don't doubt you're making it work. Good for you."
"Actually…" I leaned back against a rail and tilted my hat back out of my eyes, the standard 'cowboy about to tell a tall tale' pose. "I dropped in just before the Baratie. Have you not seen Ghin wandering around? Between his overprotectiveness and Johnny and Yosaku's… being themselves, it was like getting an older brother and two younger ones in the space of a few days…"
-o-
High above, the rigging bounced as two silvery foxes chased each other along the lines, snapping playfully. Chattering calls sounded as the mother-daughter pair bounded along the ropes. Meanwhile, on the deck, a slightly more grounded reunion was going on- only slightly more grounded, seeing as the young women getting to know each other were a pair of literal angels.
"AHAHAHAHAHA!" Conis wiped tears of mirth from her eyes. "I can't believe Father managed to do that to your wedding cake!"
Serra smiled beatifically as she tapped the tip of her parasol on the lawn. "Really, dear, is it so much harder to believe than what you told me about him blowing up the bathroom when he refused to call a handyman?"
"…No, I guess not." The younger angel shook her head with a bright smile. "It's Father; I shouldn't be surprised. He'll knock his own beard off one of these days."
The older angel chuckled. "Even so, if he ever decides to bake you a cake, ensure that he remembers the difference between cinnamon and cumin."
An indignant squawk interrupted the pair's story exchange; not far away, two more women were glaring at each other so intensely it almost seemed they had lightning crackling in between them.
The redhead took a challenging step forward as she snarled at her white-haired opponent. "What did you just call me?"
"You heard me, Government Dog. There's no such thing as an ex-marine," the taller woman sneered. "We're lucky these mists are impenetrable to normal acts of time and space, otherwise you'd turn us all in."
"My daughters are on these ships, you Void-hunting bitch! How dare you suggest I would do anything to harm them! GRAH!" Bellemere bellowed furiously as she swung a wild punch at Olvia; the archaeologist slid out of the way, a dark glint in her eyes promising pain.
The sight dragged a pair of exasperated sighs from Conis and Serra. On the opposite side of the irate pair, another woman had the same reaction. Nefertari Titi shook her head as if she were regarding a pair of naughty toddlers before sending a significant glance Serra's way. The elder angel rose, shooting her daughter an apologetic look. "Just a minute, Love. Let me see if I can get those two to pipe down."
Serra approached Bellemere and Olvia with her hands raised, a sign of peace. They paused in their squabbling to frown at her as she came closer. "Ladies, this is supposed to be a happy day. Please stop fighting- you'll worry your daughters."
The response was… less than peaceful.
"Shove it, ya filthy pirate!" Bellemere shot an obscene gesture Serra's way. "I don't wanna hear about worrying family from some floozy who took off when her daughter was barely out of her diapers."
"That's the one thing we can agree on," Olvia sniffed. "At least my only crimes were being literate and having my own opinion."
Well, that was just—! Serra struggled to hold onto her temper. Opposite her, Titi sighed again and rolled her eyes. The queen approached Bellemere from behind as the ex-marine turned to snarl something at Olvia, motioning discreetly to Serra as she did so. The angel nodded and moved so she was slightly behind the archaeologist.
"There's a reason you're not supposed to hunt those stones, you—!"
THUNK!
Skull met skull as Titi and Serra slammed the combatants' heads together, the argument dying a brutal death as Bellemere and Olvia both keeled over with pained gurgles, their blank eyes indicating a distinct lack of consciousness.
Titi turned to Serra with a smile and granted her a graceful bow. "Thank you for your assistance, ma'am."
"No problem, Love." The angel grinned and dusted off her hands. "Honestly? It was just like being back on the Jackson. It feels like we have to solve a problem that way every hour on the hour."
Titi hid a snicker behind her hand as she righted herself, an impish glint in her eye. "Funny, I was about to say the same, only in regards to the last Reverie I attended."
Serra's grin widened as she held her elbow out to the queen. "Oooh, please do tell."
Titi eagerly hooked her arm with the pirate's and the pair started to walk off…
"Mrgh…" Bellemere groaned as she started to sit up, rubbing the latest goosebump she'd accrued. "This is why I hated the damn Royal postings…"
THWACK!
Though not before the handle of Serra's parasol accidentally swung into the Marine's cranium, dropping her like a sack of potatoes.
-o-
"Other me, can you pass the garlic?" 12! Sanji called over as he rifled through Sunny's cabinets, making a face as he processed what he'd just said. "Never thought something like that'd be coming out of my mouth…"
"Sure thing. And me neither." The twin cooks were just finishing up dinner, their older/younger sister sitting on a stool watching them. TB! Sanji had just tossed 12! Sanji saw a garlic bulb when the door creaked open behind them. Heavy boots thudded against wood.
"Hey… Older, less shitty Shit Cook, can I talk to you for a bit?" Ghin leaned against the counter beside TB!Sanji. Both cooks huffed- their domain was sacred, couldn't the war dog at least wash his hands before he touched everything? But the elder nodded as he carefully tossed an immense Caesar salad.
"Sure, I guess. What about?"
"Jones said you were the one who saved me, in versions where she wasn't there. Mostly just wanted to say thanks, on behalf of me from your world. Although… I'm kinda surprised not to see him here."
"Ah, don't worry about it," TB! Sanji waved him off indifferently as he flipped the contents of a frying pan. "He's doing well enough for himself- found his own shittier captain to serve. Though last I heard, he was pissed at the guy for stealing his credit over punching out a Celestial Dragon."
A dark grin crossed Ghin's face; he managed to tilt his head at just the right angle to make his headband shadow his eyes. "That so? Good. Those bastards have it coming, and more. If I could take out every last one of 'em… Although I guess that means yours is one step ahead of mine. Figures." The older pirate let out a huff of laughter. "Ah, well, I'm sure I'll catch up soon enough."
Pushing off the counter, Ghin wandered back out of the galley. He waved over his shoulder before slamming the door; 12! Sanji shook his head, but said nothing.
Reiju smiled at the sight. "You've made some good friends, Sanji. Both of you. You're happy here, aren't you? More than you could've been at home?"
The Sanjis looked at each other. "This is home," they said in unison. "This, and the Baratie. Nowhere else."
"Oh. That's good. I'm proud." Hopping off her stool, Reiju was at the counter before either of her brothers could blink. "You were always too good a person for Father; these pirates deserve you more. And you're even a decent cook now." The little princess reached out and absconded with a small spoonful of pudding before skipping out of the room. Both Sanjis stared at her, aghast.
"Reiju, wait! That's for dessert!"
"You're supposed to eat your vegetables first, you little—!" The cooks both gave up the fight with defeated sighs as they shook their heads. It was no use; Reiju wasn't going to listen. She never had. But she loved them, in her own strange way, and even after all these years, they still loved her too.
"Alright, we should probably start moving these out; they'll be kicking a party off any second now." TB! Sanji suggested.
"Tsh, damn right," 12! Sanji nodded sagely. "I can already hear Luffy shouting at the top of his lungs: 'Sanji, food!'"
"Did someone say 'food'?" both Luffys said in unison, one at the door and the other at a porthole. The Sanjis rolled their eyes as they picked up various dishes and carried them out onto the deck.
"Yeah, yeah, we're coming. Keep your hats on."
"We always do! What's that got to do with food?"
Someone—likely the Choppers and Usopps—had dragged a bunch of tables together on the deck to use as a buffet. The Sanji set their precious burdens down, then turned in unison and punted their captains across the Sunny when the Luffys tried to jump on the food.
"Wait until the ladies have a chance!" TB! Sanji shouted.
"And preferably everyone else too!" was 12!Sanji's addition.
To their credit, both Luffys backed off and waited until the food was placed on the tables before quite literally diving in… though thankfully, by that point, the Sanjis were prepared, and the duo slammed face-first into their boots, prompting the quartet to fall into a brawl.
Reiju stood to the side, watching the exchange with a raised eyebrow. "Well, this is certainly a new sight."
"Not for me it isn't," Makino giggled to herself. "Luffy and his brothers fought all the time."
Reiju's expression fell flat. "So did Sanji and his," she muttered melancholically, before she donned a fond smile. "I'm talking about the fact that he's actually holding his own."
Makino blinked at the young girl in surprise, but the girl swiftly returned a kind smile. "Well, as nice as that is, I'm afraid it won't last long if he's standing between Luffy and food, so let's get some while we can. Shall we?"
"No need, I saw this coming a mile off," Reiju waved the bartender to the side. "I hid a stockpile of food while Sanji and Sanji were cooking. Care to have some?"
Makino took one look at the throng of people surrounding the small banquet before following the young girl with a beaming smile. "I'd love some, thank you."
The two headed for the kitchen, but paused as they saw the crew's ship-girl emerge with a large bowl filled with what looked very much like a trifle.
"Hey, how come she gets dessert first?" Reiju questioned, drawing everyone's attention. Most of the This Bites crew just glanced before going back to what they were doing, but most of the rest seemed indignant.
"She has a point," 12! Sanji said. "I can understand serving the ladies first, but—"
"It's not a dessert, it just looks like one," Franky grunted as he piled a plate high, holding it out of reach of his crew by dint of his outweighing most of the crew by half. "And it's not even edible unless you were born a ship, so unless you want your stomach pumped, keep away from—"
"Fos?" A white dragon hatchling jumped up on Merry's shoulder and shoved his muzzle into her dish. The ship-girl let out a squawk of surprise. Ruatha was gone before she could do anything to him, tumbling down and across the deck while his scales turned a sickly shade of green. An instant later, the dragonet was retching over the side. "GYACH! Krastov! Hyech, hyech!"
"…Merry's food," Franky groaned as the dragon began coughing, prompting Jones and both Choppers to rush over, one in alarm, one in exasperation, and one in exasperated alarm.
"What is it, poison?" Reiju asked.
"Assorted cloth, oil, and pitch," TB! Sanji deadpanned. "Like Franky said, gourmet for a ship-girl, inedible for anyone else."
Reiju and everyone who wasn't of the This Bites crew blanched, and Sanji turned to his counterpart. "…OK, even I have to draw the line here. How do you make something that looks and smells so delicious out of cloth and oil?"
"With a lot of practice and help from some of the world's best shipwrights," TB! Sanji responded with a miserable grimace.
"And he has had a lot of practice!" Merry hummed happily as she started to suck down her distinctly unappetizing confection.
12! Usopp promptly shoved his plate back into place with a distinctly green hue to his face. "Aaaand just like that, I've lost my appetite."
"Speak for yourself!~" Robin the Younger grinned as food was piled higher and higher on her plate, Pompeii's patchwork arms reaching out to grab Mikey's discarded plate.
"Wait, wha—WHAT THE HELL!?" Franky blurted out as he noticed that not only was the tyke skimping off the top of his plate, but so too was a certain meteorological tentacle, belonging to a certain navigator. "Aww, c'mon, you too, Big Sis?! Don't you girls have first come first served privileges!?"
"What can I say?" TB! Nami grinned as her Eisen Tempo piled her food into her hands. "Somehow, it just tastes better when it carries the spice of theft! Aaaall the sweeter!"
"I'll eat to that," Robin the Elder hummed pleasantly.
"That's the ide-HEY!" TB! Nami barked as she noticed an autonomous limb swiping food from her own plate.
"All's fair when you're a pi~ra~te," Elder Robin sang cheekily.
"Why, you—!"
A short way away, Nico Olvia was watching with no small amount of bemusement as an indignant cyborg tried to fend off the thieving efforts of both her younger daughter and a meteorological-controlling navigator, who herself was duelling with the thieving hands of her older daughter.
The rebellious archaeologist watched the exhibition for a few seconds longer before slowly tilting her head to the side in confusion. "How the hell am I seeing this while I'm still sober?"
"My thoughts exactly!"
Olvia's blaring instincts prompted her to spin on her heel, bringing her face to face with…the label of a bottle? Her unasked question was answered when she noticed that said bottle was being held up next to the grinning and flushed face of a certain Mohawk-bearing Marine.
"Bellemere," she greeted coolly, confirming with a glance that the angel and queen nearby had their attention on her before glancing back at the Marine. "I see you managed to find where they keep the liquor?"
"Not like it was hidden anyway!" Bellemere snickered before shaking the bottle in a tempting manner. "More importantly, seeing as you were just griping about being too sober, wanna fix it?"
Olvia gave the Marine a look of sheer disbelief. "I thought your opinion of me was that I was a, and I quote, 'Void-hunting bitch'."
"Oh, you most definitely are, no question!" Bellemere agreed wholeheartedly, her smile wavering an inch. "Which makes it all the more important that I get you drinking!"
The Oharan's eye twitched as she tried to process just what she was hearing. "I beg your pardon?"
The Marine's grin took on a taunting overtone as she shoved it in her rival's face. "No way in hell can I let myself fail in a contest of livers against a reckless idiot like you. We, Marines, have pride!"
Olvia cocked her eyebrow in a decidedly unimpressed manner. "And?"
Bellemere's smile changed to a grimace as she glanced in the direction of the 'peacemakers' that had broken them up, and who were still eyeing them even now. "Aaaaand I've already had three concussions today. This seems like a good way to avoid a fourth while still trying to show your scrawny ass up."
Olvia's eye twitched yet again, only a lot more violently. Her eyes flicked from Bellemere to Titi and Serra, and then to the display at the buffet table; her daughters were still using their powers to snatch up food, and thoroughly enjoying it. She took a moment to appreciate the smiles that they had before turning back to the Marine and accepting the bottle.
"Fine, then. But all bets are off if either Robin asks me for something," she said.
Bellemere's smirk widened tauntingly. "That's the one thing I can respect about you. Now put up or shut up, or are you too chicken-shit of a bookworm to—?"
Olvia cut her off by snatching the bottle out of Bellemere's hand, knocking it back and draining it of its contents in a matter of seconds, a few decisive gulps. Once she was finished, she pinned the Marine with a firm glare as she shook the bottle out. "You're looking at the results of spending the better part of half a decade on the run, bitch."
Bellemere blinked at her in surprise for a moment, but she swiftly rallied in favour of donning an ecstatic grin as she raised her own bottle in a toast. "Now we're talkin'! Let's have us some fun!"
As it became clear that there was no danger of them acting up, Titi and Serra were able to relax and focus on more enjoyable things- namely, their daughters and the defence of their dinner. Titi and Serra both turned their attention to the buffet table, their daughters coming up alongside them. Smiling, the elder angel picked up a set of chopsticks along with her dinner. "Oh! I know a delightful party game we can play with these!"
"Really?" Titi picked up her own set, staring at them questioningly. "I've never heard of such a thing. How do you play?"
"Like this!" Serra promptly stuck the chopsticks up her nose, settling the other ends on her lower lip to create a bizarrely stretched smile. Conis blinked at her in shock for a moment before dissolving into a giggling mess as she grabbed up another pair of wood and started to imitate her mother.
TB! Vivi glanced at her counterpart with a sly smile. "Come on, Mother; we do it all the time." So, saying that, the elder princess retrieved her own utensils and stuck them up her nose. Titi stared a little longer, then shrugged.
"Well, I suppose it can't do any harm." Much to the horror of her younger daughter, the queen joined in as well. And she was soon having a lot of fun, dancing around with chopsticks in her nose, arm in arm with the others. 12! Vivi stared as if the other women had all grown extra heads.
"You… wha… Mother!" she yelped indignantly, "I realize that my alternate might have grown… uncouth in her exile—!"
"I'd like to politely tell you to shove it, other me!" TB! Vivi grit out through her rictus grin, a vein prominently throbbing on her brow.
"But we're still civilized, so could you… please not do that? It's undignified, and it looks painful." 12! Vivi shot a scowl at TB!Vivi's direction. Titi laughed.
"Of course, we can talk about something more ladylike if that's what you'd like, dear. So… Are there any cute pirate boys either of you has your eye on? Hmm?"
"Ah! I think I stabbed myself in the sinus!" 12! Vivi yelped as she hastily jabbed a chopstick at her nose. Her eyes were wide, and her face was flushed red. "How do you fit these in without doing serious injury?"
"Or are you still waiting for that nice boy back home? What was his name again?"
Frantically looking around for an out, her eyes alighted on Cross and Lee, who so far had been standing back, away from the carnage and looking thoroughly amused by the whole scene. "Uh, would either of you like me to get something for you?" she desperately asked.
Cross's only response was to raise his Vision Dial and snap a picture, while Lee was suddenly holding a full plate of food?! What?! But ho- oh, right. "Stands are precisely as bullshit as advertised, aren't they?" Cross asked offhandedly.
"B-rank speed is very nice," commented Lee as he took a bite. His face immediately lit up. "Oh my God, this is so good…"
Upon seeing a number of women with chopsticks up their noses, the Usopps and Choppers let out little yelps of glee. Soon there was a pair of snipers dancing around arm in arm, wooden utensils on proud display. The Choppers were slightly slower to join in, although that was only because they paused to show Hiriluk how to shove his chopsticks up his nose without hurting himself. Banchina didn't rise to join the dance, but even she had chopsticks up her nose almost as soon as her sons did. She'd probably learned it from her husband.
"Alright, Big Bro!" Johnny and Yosaku raced in a second later, taking their places on either side of the linked Usopps to form a chopstick kick line.
Fuming, the Sanjis glared around at the spreading epidemic, unable to decide who to kick first. "What's wrong with you shitheads? Can't you just sit down and eat like civilized people for once in your shitty lives?!"
"Big Sis Serra started it!" Johnny yelped, a small leap dragging his end of the kick line further from the irate cooks. Both Sanjis froze, unable to comprehend the idea of an angelic woman being the leader of the so-called 'shitheads.'
Smiling, Reiju snuck up behind her brothers, making them jump when she announced her presence with a cough. "Relax, Sanji. It's all in good fun- enjoy it." So saying, the tiny blonde girl snatched her own pair of chopsticks off the buffet table and stuffed them up her nose. Both Sanjis were too flabbergasted to do anything.
Off to one side, the Zoros leaned back against a rail, Kuina sitting in between them. No one, not even the Luffys, dared try to steal from the little girl's plate while she was under the fond eyes of the twin swordsmen. Munching thoughtfully on a carrot, Kuina looked from one Zoro to the other.
"You've come a long way since we were little. I'm proud, even if you still have a long way to go." The little girl sighed heavily. "I'm glad you talked Father into letting you have Wado after… She wouldn't have been happy hanging on a wall."
"Of course. I couldn't just let—!"
"It wouldn't have felt right to—!"
Both Zoros stopped suddenly when they realized they were talking at the same time, their ears turned slightly red. When neither of them resumed speaking immediately, Kuina smiled. "I know. That's why I'm especially glad it was you."
"It's still not right…" 12! Zoro grumbled. "You should've been here the whole time, giving the shit cook hell with me."
TB! Zoro nodded. "Even if we fulfill your dream too, it still doesn't… We'll never know how strong you could've been, whether you could've made World's Strongest Swordsman."
"Hey! If either of you can, I can too!" Kuina's eyes flashed. "You know what I think? I think that when you die, you'll find your versions of me waiting for you. I'll keep training in the afterlife so when we meet again, we can have our duel. Even if I can't be the greatest swordsman in this world, I'll be the greatest in the next one."
The Zoros each placed a hand on one of Kuina's shoulders, chuckling. "We'll see. After all, to earn that title—"
"You'll still have to beat us."
With both Zoros thus distracted and Ghin off somewhere with Tippy, there was no one to tell either Sanji off for wolf-whistling when an unfamiliar—and rather attractive—woman appeared in the midst of the chaos. Not that she paid them much attention at first. Smiling broadly, the newcomer waved at Kaya and Merry, who were off on one of the rails. "Thanks for letting me borrow the shoes, Hun. They fit great, and it sure helps my balance."
"Don't mention it." Kaya smiled. "And they look lovely on you."
"Who's that?" 12! Sanji breathed to his counterpart. "She's gorgeous!"
"No idea." The smoke from TB! Sanji's cigarette morphed into little hearts. "So, she's not on your crew, then?"
"I thought she was on yours. Must be someone's older sister or something."
The newcomer finally seemed to notice that the cooks were talking about her- and she didn't mind one bit. Sauntering over, she slung her arms over both their shoulders and hung between the Sanjis with a slight giggle. "Aww… Are you boys staring at my butt?"
"No!"/"Yes!"
"Well, at least one of you's honest. Go right ahead; I'm kinda proud of it, and just looking doesn't hurt anyone." The woman winked, causing both Sanjis to flush bright red. "And don't worry; I'm nobody's sister, so you won't have to worry about any angry brothers getting on your ass."
"But if you're not someone's sister," 12! Sanji wondered. "And you look too young to be anyone's mother… Who are you?"
"Name's Kokoro. Apparently, I'm here for Franky; my future self raised him or something. Interesting boy."
TB! Sanji paled noticeably. He froze as Kokoro continued to hug and giggle. "I am… so conflicted right now…"
"Really?" his counterpart mumbled dazedly. "Why's that?"
"Trust me when I say, you don't want to know." And with that, he slunk off back to the food table, muttering something about a man's dream and dugongs.
"IF YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT ME, SANJI, I'M A LITTLE BUSY AT THE MOMENT!" roared a ballistic seal-turtle hybrid as he shot across the deck, snagging a few strips of meat from the buffet table before blurring out of sight again. A moment later, the TDWS came into view; despite their ever-murderous appearance, they were panting a little.
"Dang it… we're slowing down," Leo growled.
"The hell we are. Hit the caffeine!" Mikey declared, shooting forward and snagging a mound of chocolate from the table, scarfing it down, and vanishing.
"Damn it, for once the nunchuk numbskull's right!" Raphey snapped, grabbing a sugary treat of her own off the table. "Sugar for energy, GO!" And with that, the dugong shoved the pastry down her throat and also blurred out of sight.
Donny and Leo hesitated with their own choices of 'food', glancing at each other uneasily. "…this is gonna suck later, isn't it?" Donny deduced miserably.
"Yeah…" Leo nodded grimly. "But at least, we're gonna make him suffer first, so bottoms up!"
With that, they each downed a can of the unholy brainchild of Franky's cola and Chopper's adrenaline serums that they had simply named 'Monster.' A second later, the pair seemed to start vibrating in place. From the perspective of everyone else, that is, Donny and Leo had a very different view. Namely, from what I could get out of their insensate mumblings after the fact? To them, the world suddenly froze. Even sound- while they could understand each other perfectly, everything else seemed like a low, senseless roar. And when they moved, they didn't blur away from the viewing parties; they simply vanished.
-o-
"Thank goodness we only had two cans of that stuff," Franky muttered, eyeing the starry-eyed Luffys who were staring at where the two Dugongs had been a moment before, then picking up the cans and surreptitiously heading for Chopper's lab.
"I'll second that," I nodded, flashing back to the last time Luffy had gotten ahold of an adrenaline-inducing solution and promptly shuddering in bowel-voiding horror.
So… much… goulash…
A thud beside me drew me out of my thoughts; Jones had returned, vaulting over her Luffy's arm to land beside me. Ruatha was perched on her shoulder once more, looking no worse for wear despite what he'd tried eating. Little Dragon must have a stomach of iron. The dragon mother sat down and portioned out food for her hatchling before getting started on her own dinner. A soft smile, much different from her earlier grins, grew on her face.
"It's nice to see everyone so happy. I'm glad… This will at least give everyone a little closure." Her voice was quiet, and a little… sad?
It took a second for things to ping for me, but once they did, I adjusted my place in my seat so that I could lean forward and get a clean look at her. "Hey… Jones?" I started tentatively. "I… geeze, can't believe we forgot, but… do you… Want to slip out real quick? Just, I dunno, do a quick circuit of the place? With Soundbite's range, I'm sure it wouldn't be that hard to find-?"
"No point." Jones shook her head promptly, her expression unchanged. "There wouldn't be anyone out there."
"Hey, come on-!" I started to assure her.
"Really, they're not," she pressed on, a slightly melancholic smile coming across her lips. "If anyone I used to know was coming, we'd know by now. My friends weren't exactly masters of stealth, and Great-Grandpa… Imagine Garp, but German. I haven't heard or seen any signs of anyone. They're not out there."
I did my best to hide a grimace as I considered who she had and, more specifically, hadn't included in her list of possibles. "Ah, geeze, Jones…"
"I-It's fine, Cross, really," she assured me, a renewed kind of energy coming into her smile. "For a while I was… resigned to the idea that maybe no one was coming for me at all. But I've been thinking about it, and I think… I know better now."
"Seriously?" I perked up eagerly, casting surreptitious glances left and right. "Well, that's great! Who is it? Is it someone he-?"
Out of the blue, I was cut off… by Jones poking me in the dead center of my forehead?
"You, moron," she snickered, her tone indicating that she meant that both with and without the comma. "I think it was supposed to be you. Weird, I know, we- we'd never met before- but it's the only explanation I can think of for…" She trailed off, waving a hand at the two crews surrounding us with joyful chaos.
I blinked at her numbly before running my hand through my hair with an exasperated laugh. "Ah, geeze, Jones… way to put pressure on a guy…" But, just as swiftly, I gave her a wide grin. "But hell, way to make him feel special too. And seeing as that's the case!" I clapped my hands and rubbed them together. "Seeing as that's the case, I might as well act the part by asking the essential question!" I leaned in to give her an inquisitive smile. "How's life on the Blue Seas been treating you?"
"Like a chew toy," she answered swiftly, not even a hint of hesitation in her voice. "Everything seems to be out to eat me, all my plans get flipped on their side, even fights that should be easy aren't what I thought they'd be… But maudit, I'm having so much fun." She broke off for a moment, staring into space. "I could've died a number of times already- could die tomorrow, for all I know. But you know what?" Here, her mad grin returned with a vengeance. "If I do, I'm taking the whole fucking Grand Line down with me."
-o-
I slammed my fist into my palm to emphasize my words, releasing a small, harmless shockwave from the impact. Ruatha chirped in agreement.
Beside us, Cross was… oddly silent for a long moment. His expression was blank as he stared at me, and I could tell that… something was churning in his head.
Finally, he folded his hands on the table and pinned me with a hard look. "Jones," he stated firmly. "I want you to do me a favour, alright?"
"Eh?" I cocked my head to the side in confusion, Ruatha following my example. "Sure. What is it?"
"Keep going. No matter what, no matter how hard it is, no matter how much it hurts… You keep going, alright? Because… you can make it, understand? I can see in you the exact same kind of guts that are in me. The exact same will to succeed. And I want you to know… when you reach the top? When you hit the top of the world… we'll be there. We'll be there, waiting to welcome you with open arms… because you have earned it. And because we know that you can make it."
Whaaaa…? My brain momentarily ceased all function. No one had ever… The next thing I knew, Ruatha was tumbling off my shoulder as I launched myself forward. I collided with Cross in a hug that probably would've been painful without my fruit, clinging to him for all I was worth. Tears welled up in the corners of my eyes; I hid my face against his shoulder so no one would see them. "Thank you… Just, thank you…"
I felt another body press against my back, arms wrapping around both of us. A thick beard tickled the top of my head. Lee. He didn't say anything; he just hugged.
And then there was a third presence as well, though not physical, as the warmth from earlier returned. An invisible force that made me feel safe… What I would give to find the source. It felt like… love?
I don't know how long the… four? of us were in that position, but when Cross and Lee pulled back, I saw pretty much everyone looking at us. Some in shock, some in confusion, and some in approval. And of the ones in the third category, the two Luffys were the most notable with their D-shaped grins. A second later, they moved in unison, raising a pair of mugs. Within seconds, everyone onboard had joined them. The captains were clearly on the same wavelength at this point, as they spoke in unison as well:
"To the craziness of the Grand Line that brought us here, to the best meat we've ever had—"
I wanted to feel exasperated at that, but with two Sanjis in the kitchen? Yeah, it was worth mentioning. Especially the bacon.
"—And to our friends from another world, and all their shenanigans!"
Suddenly, Lee had a mug in his hand and was holding out another pair towards us via Stand. Which was still freaky, by the way, but it didn't stop us from taking the mugs.
"KANPAI!" both Luffys declared in unison.
"KANPAI!" was the unanimous response from everyone surrounding us.
Cross and I exchanged bemused looks before we both grinned from ear to ear and slammed our mugs together.
"Cheers!"