Hongzhi Year 18, Twenty-third Day of the Second Month.
Hongzhi Emperor hadn't left bedchamber for three days.
Imperial doctors took turns guarding, each one coming out with same face color—gray. Empress also didn't come out, just guarded bedside. Qianqing Palace door shut, curtains drawn, no sound from inside. Only eunuchs carrying medicine bowls in and out, medicine juice spilled on steps, dried then spilled, spilled then dried, leaving patches of dark brown marks.
Zhu Houzhao knelt at Qianqing Palace door since morning.
No one let him kneel. He knelt himself. Liu Jin beside anxious pacing, advised few times, he ignored. I went give him water, he waved hand, didn't take. I didn't leave, stood under corridor, watching him kneel there. His back very straight, same as that day in Fengtian Hall. But that day for full court officials to see, today not. Today no one watching.
Noon, palace door opened. A eunuch walked out, bent waist, voice pressed very low.
"Your Highness, Emperor requests you enter."
Zhu Houzhao stood up, knees stiff, swayed, held door frame to stand steady. He didn't turn back look at me, followed eunuch in. Palace door closed behind him, inside came few coughs, then quiet.
I stood under corridor, waiting. Palace very dark. Windows shut, curtains drawn, only bedside lit a lamp. Hongzhi Emperor leaning on pillow, quilt pulled to chest. His face gray white, lips no blood color, eyes closed, like a lamp about to burn out, only last spark.
Zhu Houzhao standing bedside, didn't sit.
Hongzhi Emperor opened eyes, looked at him. Mouth corner moved, like smiling, or like no strength to smile.
"Knelt whole morning?"
"Mm."
"Not tired?"
"Not tired."
Hongzhi Emperor looked at him, gaze carrying something indescribable. Not blame, nor heartache, but a kind of "I know you showing off but I no strength expose you" helplessness.
"Come here."
Zhu Houzhao walked two steps, squatted by bedside. Hongzhi Emperor's hand from quilt extended, placed on his hand. That hand thin like withered branch, fingernails white, skin thin enough to see blue blood vessels underneath. Zhu Houzhao's hand bigger than his, palm facing up, holding that withered hand, motionless.
"Zhen wrote an edict." Hongzhi Emperor said, voice very light, like wind blows away. "Under pillow."
Zhu Houzhao didn't speak.
"You take look."
Zhu Houzhao extended hand took yellow silk scroll from under pillow, unfolded. Edict. Passing throne edict. On it wrote his name.
He looked long time. Palace quiet enough to hear lamp wick burning sound, zi zi, like someone sighing.
"Finished looking?" Hongzhi Emperor asked.
"Finished."
"Anything want say?"
Zhu Houzhao silent a while. "You wrote how long?"
Hongzhi Emperor paused. "What?"
"This edict. You wrote how long."
Hongzhi Emperor looked at him, mouth corner moved. "Three days."
"Three days." Zhu Houzhao repeated. He rolled edict, put back under pillow. "You wrote three days, I looked three times. Enough."
Hongzhi Emperor looked at him, didn't speak. After a while, he laughed. Not that mouth corner twitch light laugh, but another—like person stood cliff edge whole life, finally could sit down rest.
"You like Zhen." he said.
"Where like?"
"Stubborn."
Zhu Houzhao didn't speak. Hongzhi Emperor's hand in his palm moved, like looking for something.
"Houzhao."
"Here."
"After Zhen gone, this world yours."
Zhu Houzhao didn't speak.
"Zhen know you don't want sit this chair. Zhen young, also didn't want. But you must sit. Because you surname Zhu, because you Crown Prince, because this world, no second person can take."
"I know." Zhu Houzhao said. Voice very flat, but I saw his fingers tightened.
Hongzhi Emperor looked at him, gaze from his face slowly moved, like memorizing something.
"Zhen one more thing."
"You say."
"That palace maid."
Zhu Houzhao's fingers moved.
"She saved you. Investigated fake medicine. Guarded you." Hongzhi Emperor's voice getting lighter. "You trust her, Zhen also trust her."
He paused, panted few breaths.
"But she is palace maid. You want use her, must have method."
Zhu Houzhao didn't speak.
Hongzhi Emperor looked at him, mouth corner twitched up—exactly same as Zhu Houzhao smiling.
"You think yourself. Zhen not manage anymore."
He closed eyes, hand from Zhu Houzhao's palm slid down, placed on quilt. Zhu Houzhao's hand suspended mid-air, after a while, pulled back.
"Father Emperor."
Hongzhi Emperor didn't answer. His breathing shallow, chest almost no rise and fall. Lamp wick jumped, his shadow on wall followed swayed.
Zhu Houzhao stood up, stood bedside, lowered head looking at him.
"Father Emperor." He called again.
Hongzhi Emperor's eyes moved, didn't open.
"Mm."
"I go."
"Mm."
Zhu Houzhao turned to walk out. Walking to door, stopped, turned back looked. Hongzhi Emperor lying on bed, face facing this side, eyes closed. Don't know if asleep, or don't want open eyes.
He pushed door, walked out. Palace door opened. Zhu Houzhao walked out, sunlight on his face, he squinted eyes. His eyes red, but face no expression.
"Go." he said.
"Where to?"
He didn't answer, walked out. I followed behind.
He walked not fast, steps very steady. From Qianqing Palace to Eastern Palace, then Eastern Palace to Imperial Garden. In Imperial Garden stood a while, looking at pond ice already melting, thin layer, underneath water black, can't see how deep. Liu Jin followed behind, wanted ask something, didn't dare. I signaled him don't follow, he looked at Zhu Houzhao's back, retreated.
Zhu Houzhao walked to Eastern Palace door, stopped.
"Lizi."
"Mm."
"My Father Emperor said, she saved you, investigated fake medicine, guarded you."
I paused. "When say?"
"Just now."
"And?"
"He said, you trust her, Zhen also trust her."
He didn't look at me, looking distance. Qianqing Palace direction, a cloud drifted over, blocked sun, courtyard dark instant, then bright.
"And?" I asked.
He silent a while. "He said, you are palace maid, I want use you, must have method."
I didn't speak.
He turned head looked at me. Sunlight on his face, his eyes very bright.
"You think, what method good?"
I looked at his eyes. His eyes have something—not probing, not asking, but a kind of "I already thought, but I ask you first" certainty.
"You think yourself." I said.
He looked at me, suddenly laughed. Not that mouth corner twitch light laugh, but real laugh, tiger teeth showing.
"You and my Father Emperor say same words."
"What words?"
"'You think yourself'."
He didn't wait my answer, turned and walked. Pace faster than just now.
I stood in place, watching his back disappear at corridor end. Sunlight stretched his shadow very short, shrunk at feet.
That night, Hongzhi Emperor passed away.
News came, Zhu Houzhao in Eastern Palace, staring at a memorial. Liu Jin rushed in, pu tong knelt, voice changed.
"Your Highness—Emperor—Emperor passed away—"
Zhu Houzhao's brush dropped. Ink splashed on memorial, spreading black patch.
He stood up, chair kuang dang fell. He didn't pick up, walked out. Walking to door, paused.
"Lizi."
"Here."
"Come with me."
I followed behind him. He walked very fast, not daytime slow steps, is running. I almost trot to catch up.
Qianqing Palace door already knelt ground full of people. Eunuchs, maids, imperial doctors, black mass, crying sound from inside, muffled, like pressed by something.
Zhu Houzhao walked into palace. Hongzhi Emperor lying on bed, quilt pulled to chest, face facing sky, eyes closed. Same as daytime. But different. Daytime he still breathing, now gone. Palace very quiet, quiet enough to hear candle flower popping sound. Empress sitting bedside, holding his hand, didn't cry. Her eyes red, spine very straight, like a tree blown by wind long time, finally stood steady.
Zhu Houzhao stood bedside, lowered head looking at his Father Emperor.
He didn't cry. Also didn't speak. Just standing there, like daytime kneeling at Qianqing Palace door, back very straight.
After a while, he turned around, walked out. I followed behind.
Walking to Qianqing Palace door, he stopped. Sky already bright, east horizon a line of light, gray, like隔着 (ge zhe) gauze. Palace lanterns still lit, orange-red, very dark in morning light.
"Lizi."
"Mm."
"I no Father Emperor."
His voice very flat, like saying something unrelated to himself. But I saw his hand trembling.
I walked over, held his hand. His hand very cold, same as that day on roof.
He didn't pull away. Also didn't speak.
We just standing like that, watching sky bit by bit brighten. Lanterns out, sun rose, shining on glazed tiles, golden.
He standing beside me, hand still holding mine. Didn't let go.
(End of Chapter 31)