The room assignment sheet had barely survived five minutes of scrutiny.
Everyone was still arguing in small pockets—Yuji questioning reality, Hakari treating it like a game bracket, Maki quietly deciding who she'd throw first if things went wrong.
Takeru, however, was not done.
He lifted the paper slightly.
Adjusted it.
Then spoke like he was updating a mission briefing.
"…We will switch roommates every once in a while."
Silence.
Yuji blinked.
"…Switch… what?"
Hakari leaned in.
"…OH he added a rotation system."
Maki's head snapped toward him.
"…Absolutely not."
Takeru continued, completely unfazed.
"…This is to maximize group cohesion and relaxation exposure."
Yuji pointed.
"…HOW DOES SWITCHING ROOMS HELP US RELAX?!"
Hakari grinned.
"…Nah, he's cooking. This is chaos bonding."
Kirara sighed.
"…This is going to be exhausting."
Panda nodded.
"…Emotionally and physically."
Yuta looked concerned.
"…Should we… approve that?"
Maki answered instantly.
"…No."
Gojo, of course:
"…Yes."
Maki turned slowly.
"…Stop helping."
Takeru tapped the page again.
"…Nanami gets his own room."
Silence.
Hakari blinked.
"…Wait."
Yuji leaned forward.
"…That's actually normal."
Maki paused.
"…For once."
Kirara nodded.
"…That makes sense."
Panda gave a thumbs up.
"…Respect for the one adult."
And then—
Nanami's voice came from behind them.
"…Correct decision."
Everyone turned.
Nanami stood there, arms folded, expression as unreadable as ever—but somehow more tired than yesterday.
"…I will not be participating in roommate rotations."
Hakari whispered:
"…He already knows."
Yuji whispered back:
"…He's been listening this whole time."
Takeru nodded once.
"…This is to have us all relax."
Nanami looked at him.
Long pause.
"…You define relaxation incorrectly."
Takeru blinked.
"…Clarification requested."
Nanami didn't hesitate.
"…Relaxation does not involve scheduling, rotation systems, or forced social restructuring."
Hakari quietly:
"…He just got professionally corrected."
Yuji nodded.
"…Hard."
Takeru processed that.
Then nodded slowly.
"…Noted."
A pause.
Then:
"…Rotation schedule remains."
Maki immediately:
"…No it does not."
Gojo laughed.
"…Oh, this is going to be fun."
Kirara rubbed their temples.
"…I already need a vacation from the vacation."
Panda sighed.
"…We haven't even left yet."
Yuta added quietly:
"…This might be stressful…"
Inumaki:
"…Kelp."
(agreed)
Nanami adjusted his tie slightly.
"…You will all follow a basic structure."
Takeru nodded.
"…Structure acknowledged."
Nanami continued:
"…And you will also rest."
Takeru:
"…Rest included."
Nanami narrowed his eyes slightly.
"…Actual rest."
Takeru paused.
Then nodded again.
"…Attempted."
Hakari laughed under his breath.
"…That's the best you're getting."
Yuji groaned.
"…We're not surviving this trip."
And through all of it—
Takeru looked completely satisfied.
Plan set.
People assigned.
Adjustments in motion.
Like the chaos was exactly where it needed to be.