ROOM 7
Chapter Eight: The Experiment
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Jay Mariano had a rule about walking in Room 7: always look down.
The floor was a hazard zone of backpacks, shoes, charging cables, and whatever Yuri had dropped that day. David kept it organized. David was one person. The chaos was twelve people. The math didn't work.
But today, Jay was distracted.
Keifer had said something that morning. Something about her hair. Something about how it looked when the sun hit it. Something stupid and annoying and completely unnecessary.
And she couldn't stop thinking about it.
So she wasn't looking down.
She was looking at Keifer— who was sitting on his bed, smirking at her like he knew exactly what she was thinking— when her slipper caught on a charging cable.
Time slowed down.
The floor rushed up to meet her.
Her arms windmilled. Her coffee flew. Her life flashed before her eyes— not her whole life, just the parts with Keifer in them, which was infuriating.
She was going to fall.
She was going to fall in front of everyone.
She was going to fall in front of him.
And then— arms. Strong arms. Familiar arms. Arms that had caught her before, on a rooftop, in a moment she'd replayed a thousand times.
Keifer caught her.
His hand was on her waist. Her hand was on his chest. Her coffee was on the floor. Her face was inches from his.
"Hi," he said.
"You caught me," she said.
"You were falling."
"I wasn't falling. I was... descending rapidly."
"That's falling."
"That's controlled descent."
"Your arms were windmilling."
"Windmilling is a valid stabilization technique."
"Your coffee is on the floor."
Jay looked at the coffee. Her coffee. Black, no sugar. The way he made it for her every morning. It was pooling on the floor, soaking into someone's notebook.
"That was my coffee."
"I'll make you another one."
"That was the coffee you made me."
"I make you coffee every morning."
"That was today's coffee."
"I'll make you tomorrow's coffee."
"I want today's coffee."
"You can't have today's coffee. It's on the floor."
"Then I want you to go get me new coffee."
"You have legs. Get it yourself."
"You caught me. That means you're responsible for me now."
"That's not how catching works."
"That's exactly how catching works. It's in the Geneva Convention."
"The Geneva Convention is about war crimes."
"So is your face."
Keifer blinked. "What does that even mean?"
"I don't know. I'm concussed."
"You're not concussed. I caught you before you hit the ground."
"Emotional concussion. It's a thing."
"It's not a thing."
"It's a thing."
"You're making it a thing."
"I'm making it a thing because you made my coffee fall."
"I didn't make your coffee fall. Your slipper made your coffee fall."
"My slipper is innocent."
"Your slipper is a hazard."
"My slipper is a victim of your charging cable."
"My charging cable was doing its job."
"Its job is to charge things, not to murder me."
"It didn't murder you. I caught you."
"I didn't ask to be caught."
"You were falling."
"I was testing gravity."
"How's that going?"
"It passed."
They were still standing there. His hand on her waist. Her hand on his chest. His face inches from hers. Neither of them moved.
Everyone in the room was watching.
No one was breathing.
"You can let go now," Jay said.
"I know."
"You're not letting go."
"I know."
"Why?"
Keifer's eyes dropped to her lips. "I'm testing gravity."
"That's not how gravity works."
"Gravity works in mysterious ways."
"Gravity is physics. Physics isn't mysterious."
"You're mysterious."
"I'm not mysterious. I'm predictable."
"You're the most unpredictable person I've ever met."
"I have a schedule."
"Your schedule says you hate me."
"I do hate you."
"Then why are you still standing here?"
Jay opened her mouth. Closed it. Opened it again.
She didn't have an answer.
Or rather, she had an answer. She just wasn't ready to say it.
So instead, she shoved him.
He stumbled back, laughing. "What was that for?"
"Letting go."
"You told me to let go."
"You took too long."
"I took exactly the right amount of time."
"You took seven seconds. Freya counted."
"Freya counts everything."
"Freya is a documentarian."
"Freya is a menace."
From across the room, Freya's camera clicked. "I heard my name."
"GOOD!"
"I'm adding this to the folder."
"DELETE THE FOLDER!"
"THE FOLDER IS ETERNAL!"
---
Part Two: The Aftermath
Jay was still fuming when she went to make new coffee.
Keifer followed her to the kitchen area. "You're still mad about the coffee?"
"I'm not mad about the coffee."
"You're mad about something."
"I'm mad about you."
"That's not new."
"You're infuriating."
"You like it."
"I don't like it."
"Your face is red."
"It's the heat."
"It's December."
"GLOBAL WARMING!"
"You said that last time."
"IT'S STILL GLOBAL WARMING!"
Keifer leaned against the counter, watching her make coffee. "You know, for someone who claims to hate me, you spend a lot of time making coffee where I can see you."
"I'm not making coffee where you can see me. I'm making coffee in the kitchen. You happen to be in the kitchen."
"You could have used the other coffee maker."
"There's only one coffee maker."
"Exactly."
"So?"
"So you chose to be here. With me. In the kitchen. Where I am."
Jay's hands tightened on the coffee pot. "I didn't choose to be here. I need coffee. You're in my way."
"I'm not in your way. I'm leaning against a counter."
"You're in my peripheral vision."
"My peripheral vision is very charming."
"Your peripheral vision is blocking my coffee."
"I'm not blocking anything. You're just distracted."
"I'm not distracted."
"Your coffee is overflowing."
Jay looked down. Coffee was pouring over the top of her cup, spilling onto the counter, dripping onto the floor.
"Damn it."
Keifer grabbed a towel and started wiping it up. "This is the second coffee you've lost today."
"This is your fault."
"How is this my fault?"
"You're distracting."
"I thought you weren't distracted."
"I changed my mind."
"So you admit I'm distracting?"
"I admit you're annoying."
"Same thing."
"It's not the same thing."
"It's exactly the same thing."
"It's not—" Jay stopped. Took a breath. Started again. "Just. Give me my coffee."
Keifer handed her the cup. Their fingers touched. Neither of them pulled away.
"Thank you," she said.
"You're welcome."
She took a sip. It was perfect. It was always perfect.
"You're still annoying," she said.
"I know."
"And I still hate you."
"I know."
"And I'm not— I'm not saying I feel anything. I'm just saying... you make good coffee."
Keifer's smile was slow and warm. "That's all I ask, Mariano."
She walked away.
She was smiling.
She didn't care who saw.
---
Part Three: The Argument
Across the room, Care and Cole were having their daily argument.
It was a ritual at this point. Every afternoon, they would find something to argue about. Politics. Philosophy. The correct way to organize a bookshelf. Nothing was too small. Nothing was too large. They argued about everything.
Today, they were arguing about human reproduction.
"I'm just saying," Cole said, his voice rising, "the textbook is wrong."
"The textbook is peer-reviewed," Care said. "You're a freshman."
"I'm a freshman with opinions."
"Opinions aren't facts."
"Facts are opinions with evidence."
"That's not— that's not how facts work."
"That's exactly how facts work."
"You're impossible."
"I'm correct."
"You're insufferable."
"I'm intellectually honest."
"You're a menace."
"You said that already."
"I'll say it again. Menace. Academic menace. A menace to the very concept of scholarship."
Cole crossed his arms. "If you're so smart, why don't you explain it to me?"
"Explain what?"
"Human reproduction. According to you. Since the textbook is wrong."
Care's face went red. "I'm not going to explain human reproduction to you."
"Why not? You explain everything else to me. You explained thermodynamics last week. You explained the French Revolution yesterday. You explained why my sock organization system is 'a crime against humanity.' But human reproduction? That's where you draw the line?"
"Because— because it's different."
"How?"
"It just is."
"That's not an answer."
"Cole."
"Care."
"Shut up."
"Make me."
The room went quiet.
Everyone turned to look.
Jay and Keifer stopped pretending they weren't watching. Lyra and Alex looked up from whatever they were doing. Mica and Calix paused mid-conversation. Yuri stopped gaming. Freya raised her camera.
Care and Cole were standing two feet apart, faces red, breathing hard, the way they always did when they argued.
"Make me," Cole said again, quieter this time.
Care stared at him.
Cole stared at Care.
And then—
Cole kissed her.
It wasn't gentle. It wasn't romantic. It was a kiss of pure frustration. The kind of kiss that happens when two people have been arguing for so long they forget what they were arguing about. The kind of kiss that happens when "make me" wasn't a challenge, it was a plea.
Care made a sound. A small sound. A sound that said she'd been waiting for this for a very long time.
And then she kissed him back.
The room exploded.
---
Part Four: The Explosion
Yuri screamed first. "OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD!"
Then Lyra screamed. "THEY KISSED! THE ACADEMIC RIVALS KISSED!"
Then Freya screamed, but she was also taking photos, so it came out as a sort of shriek-click-shriek-click pattern.
Mica dropped her book. Calix dropped his sandwich. David, somehow, was still eating his chips.
Alex's mouth fell open. "Did that just—"
"YES!" Yuri shouted. "YES IT DID!"
Jay's coffee cup froze halfway to her mouth. "They kissed."
"They kissed," Keifer confirmed.
"In the middle of an argument."
"The most academic argument I've ever heard."
"About human reproduction."
"About the textbook being wrong."
"They kissed because Cole couldn't win the argument."
"They kissed because Cole couldn't win the argument."
Jay looked at Keifer. Keifer looked at Jay.
"Is that going to be us?" Jay asked.
"Absolutely."
"I'm not kissing you because I lose an argument."
"You'll kiss me because you can't win."
"I always win."
"You literally chased me up five flights of stairs because I stole your highlighter."
"That was different."
"How?"
"I was winning."
"You fell on top of me."
"That was strategy."
"Strategy?"
"Strategic falling."
"You fell on top of me and then we almost kissed."
"I was checking your pulse."
"On my lips?"
"Pulses can be anywhere."
"You're insane."
"You kissed me first in this scenario."
"I haven't kissed you at all."
"Yet."
Jay threw her napkin at him. He caught it.
Across the room, Care and Cole had finally pulled apart.
They were both breathing hard. Their faces were red. Their hair was a mess.
The room was dead silent.
Care opened her mouth.
Cole opened his mouth.
No one spoke.
Then Care said, very calmly, "That was an experiment."
Cole blinked. "What?"
"An experiment. For class. Reproduction in humans. Chapter fourteen. I needed a control subject."
"You used me as a control subject?"
"You were available."
"I'm not a control subject. I'm a person."
"You're a person who was available."
"Care."
"Cole."
"You kissed me back."
"I was testing for variables."
"What variables?"
"Whether you would kiss me back."
"That's not a variable. That's a constant."
"So you admit you would always kiss me back?"
"I— that's not—" Cole's face went redder. "That's not what I said."
"That's exactly what you said."
"I said it's a constant. Constants are predictable."
"So you're predictable?"
"I'm reliable. There's a difference."
"Reliable?"
"When it comes to kissing you? Apparently, yes."
The room lost its collective mind again.
Yuri fell off his chair. "THEY'RE STILL ARGUING! THEY KISSED AND THEY'RE STILL ARGUING!"
"It's an experiment!" Care insisted.
"YOU CAN'T EXPERIMENT ON PEOPLE WITHOUT CONSENT!"
"I had consent! He kissed me first!"
"I kissed you because you told me to make you!"
"That's not consent! That's a challenge!"
"Challenges imply consent!"
"That's not how consent works!"
"That's how our consent works!"
Mica put her head in her hands. "They're going to argue about consent now."
"They're going to argue about everything," Calix said. "Forever."
"They're going to be arguing when they're eighty."
"They're going to be arguing at their wedding."
"They're going to be arguing during their vows."
" 'I take thee, despite your incorrect opinions on the French Revolution—' "
" '—and your refusal to acknowledge that the textbook is wrong—' "
" '—to have and to hold—' "
" '—until peer review do us part—' "
Mica and Calix looked at each other. "We need to stop them."
"No," Yuri said. "This is the best thing that's ever happened."
"Your bar is very low."
"My bar is entertainment."
---
Part Five: The Documentation
Freya was in heaven.
She circled Care and Cole like a wildlife photographer documenting a rare species. Her camera never stopped clicking. Her eyes never stopped gleaming.
"This is the best day of my life," she whispered.
"You say that every week," Erdix said.
"This week it's true!"
"It's always true with you."
"Because every week something incredible happens in this room!"
Erdix looked at Care and Cole, who were now arguing about whether the kiss was romantic or scientific. "This is pretty incredible."
"This is the most incredible. Chapter fourteen. Reproduction in humans. They kissed because of homework."
"They kissed because they're in love."
"That's the same thing in this room."
Erdix laughed. "You're not wrong."
Freya lowered her camera for a moment. "Do you think they'll ever admit it?"
"Admit what?"
"That they're not arguing because they're rivals. That they're arguing because they're—"
"In love?"
"In something."
Erdix looked at Care and Cole. At the way Cole's hand was still on Care's arm. At the way Care hadn't moved away. At the way they were standing closer than they'd ever stood before.
"They'll figure it out," he said. "Eventually."
"Before Jay and Keifer?"
"Nothing happens before Jay and Keifer."
"Before Lyra and Alex?"
"Nothing happens before Lyra and Alex either."
"So after the heat death of the universe?"
"Exactly."
Freya raised her camera again. "Good. I'll have plenty of time to document."
---
Part Six: The Aftermath (The Real One)
Care and Cole finally stopped arguing.
They didn't stop standing close. They didn't stop looking at each other. But they stopped arguing.
"So," Cole said.
"So," Care said.
"That was—"
"An experiment."
"Right. An experiment."
"For chapter fourteen."
"Reproduction in humans."
"Very academic."
"Very scientific."
They stood in silence for a moment.
"Should we—" Cole started.
"Do it again?" Care finished.
"I was going to say 'analyze the data.'"
"That's the same thing."
"It's not the same thing."
"It's exactly the same thing."
"How?"
"Data analysis requires repetition. One data point isn't enough."
Cole's face split into a grin. "So you're saying we need to repeat the experiment?"
"For scientific accuracy."
"For science."
"For science."
He kissed her again.
The room exploded again.
Yuri was now on the floor, clutching his chest. "I CAN'T! I CAN'T TAKE ANYMORE!"
"YOU'RE DRAMATIC!" Lyra shouted.
"YOU'RE IN DENIAL!"
"I'M NOT IN DENIAL!"
"YOU'RE HOLDING ALEX'S HAND RIGHT NOW!"
Lyra looked down. She was, in fact, holding Alex's hand. She didn't remember grabbing it. She didn't remember not letting go.
"We were holding hands for emotional support," she said.
"FROM WHAT?"
"FROM THE EMOTIONAL WHIPLASH OF CARE AND COLE'S EXPERIMENT!"
"It's not an experiment!"
"IT'S AN EXPERIMENT! THEY SAID SO!"
"THEY'RE LYING!"
"ABOUT SCIENCE?"
"ABOUT FEELINGS!"
Alex squeezed Lyra's hand. "We should let go."
"No."
"Everyone's staring."
"Let them stare."
"We're going to end up in Freya's folder."
"We're already in Freya's folder. Everyone's in Freya's folder. Freya has a folder for everyone."
"That's concerning."
"That's Freya."
They didn't let go.
---
Part Seven: The Group Chat
That night, the group chat was chaos.
Yuri: OKAY
Yuri: CARE AND COLE
Yuri: KISSED
Yuri: TWICE
Yuri: FOR SCIENCE
Freya: I have the footage
Freya: All of it
Freya: High definition
Freya: Slow motion
Freya: Different angles
Care: DELETE THAT
Freya: NO
Care: IT WAS AN EXPERIMENT
Cole: It was an experiment
Care: For chapter fourteen
Cole: Reproduction in humans
Care: Very academic
Cole: Very scientific
Yuri: YOU KISSED TWICE
Care: Repetition is necessary for accurate data
Cole: One data point isn't enough
Yuri: YOU'RE STILL ARGUING
Care: We're discussing
Cole: There's a difference
Yuri: THERE'S NO DIFFERENCE
Mica: I'm just glad they finally—
Care: Finally what?
Mica: Finally... experimented
Care: Yes
Cole: Experimented
Mica: That's what I said
Calix: That's what we all said
Lyra: WAIT
Lyra: DOES THIS MEAN CARE AND COLE ARE—
Care: Are what?
Lyra: You know
Cole: Know what?
Lyra: TOGETHER
Care: We're academic rivals
Cole: Academic rivals who experiment together
Care: For science
Cole: For science
Lyra: I HATE EVERYONE
Alex: Same
Yuri: ALEX YOU'RE HOLDING LYRA'S HAND RIGHT NOW
Alex: I'm holding my best friend's hand
Lyra: For emotional support
Yuri: FROM WHAT
Lyra: FROM THE EMOTIONAL DAMAGE OF THIS ROOM
Freya: [image attached]
Freya: This is the best photo from today
Freya: Care and Cole kissing
Freya: Jay and Keifer standing two inches apart
Freya: Lyra and Alex holding hands
Freya: Mica and Calix watching
Freya: Yuri on the floor
Freya: David eating chips
Freya: This room is beautiful
David: The chips were good
David: I have more if anyone wants
Yuri: DAVID THIS IS NOT THE TIME FOR CHIPS
David: There's always time for chips
Yuri: YOU'RE RIGHT
Yuri: I WANT CHIPS
Jay: I'm leaving this group chat
Keifer: No you're not
Jay: Watch me
Keifer: You've said that twelve times
Jay: This time I mean it
Keifer: You never mean it
Jay: I hate you
Keifer: You like it
Jay: I don't not like it
Yuri: THEY'RE DOING IT AGAIN
Yuri: THE THING
Yuri: WHERE THEY ALMOST CONFESS
Freya: I'm documenting it
Freya: For science
Care: Science requires consent
Cole: We consent to the documentation
Care: For academic purposes
Cole: For the advancement of knowledge
Yuri: YOU'RE NOT EVEN IN THIS PART OF THE CONVERSATION
Care: We're in all parts of the conversation
Cole: We're everywhere
Yuri: THAT'S TERRIFYING
Care: That's thorough
Cole: Same thing
---
Part Eight: The Night
Later that night, long after everyone had gone to sleep, Jay lay in her bed and stared at the ceiling.
She could hear Keifer breathing from across the room. Two beds away. But in the silence, it felt like he was right next to her.
She liked that.
She didn't hate that.
"Hey, Mariano."
His voice was soft. Quiet. Just for her.
"Hey, Watson."
"Can't sleep?"
"No."
"Me neither."
Silence.
"Care and Cole kissed," she said.
"For science."
"For 'science.'"
"They're going to be arguing about that kiss for the rest of their lives."
"They're going to be arguing about everything for the rest of their lives."
"That's their love language."
"That's their everything language."
Jay smiled into her pillow. "They're going to be arguing at their wedding."
"They're going to be arguing during their vows."
"They're going to be arguing about who said 'I do' first."
"And then they're going to kiss again."
"To settle the argument."
"For science."
"For science."
They lay in silence for a moment.
"Keifer?"
"Yeah?"
"Are we going to be like them?"
"Arguing forever?"
"No. Well. Yes. But also—" She paused. "Are we going to be the kind of people who kiss and call it an experiment?"
Keifer laughed— soft and warm. "No. When we kiss, it's not going to be an experiment."
"What's it going to be?"
"It's going to be a conclusion."
Jay's heart stopped. "A conclusion?"
"To a very long experiment. Fifteen years in the making. Hypothesis: Jay Mariano doesn't actually hate Keifer Watson. Conclusion: She never did."
Jay was quiet for a long moment.
"That's a very confident hypothesis."
"I'm a very confident scientist."
"You're a menace."
"You like it."
"I don't not like it."
From across the room, Yuri's voice cut through the darkness: "IF YOU TWO DON'T KISS SOON, I'M GOING TO LOSE MY MIND."
"GO TO SLEEP, YURI!"
"I CAN'T! THE TENSION IS KILLING ME!"
"THERE IS NO TENSION!"
"YOUR HANDS ARE LITERALLY REACHING FOR EACH OTHER IN THE DARK!"
Jay looked down. Her hand was reaching toward Keifer's bed.
She pulled it back.
Keifer laughed.
She smiled.
And somewhere across the room, Freya's camera clicked in the darkness.
She didn't even bother telling her to delete it.
---
End of Chapter Eight