I slowly open the door to the orphanage, sneaking inside with little or no sound. It's past curfew time, past grace time— that is, time after curfew when you can redeem yourself. However, here am I. Doing the very thing I've promised at least a million times not to do. The door creaks as I close it. Stupid wooden door. Would definitely expose me. I look around. It's empty. The kind of empty that speaks volumes about a presence.
The Matron of the orphanage is Hilda and I am anything but her friend. Might as well be her target, worse nightmare. Everything she doesn't like. I'm already on her bad side and this, this will put me in the side of her worse than bad. Anyways, that all depends on if I'm caught. Sometimes I think she wants to get rid of me, but the overseer is in charge of taking care of orphans, so it's not her call.
I tiptoe towards the staircase and just as my foot land on a stair, the lights come on. I stop, everything in me screams she's behind me but I pray the opposite. I turn slowly and a startled shout escape my lips but I slap my palm across it.
Matron Hilda is standing there, arms folded, face squeezed so strong that I'm scared her eye balls might fall out. "Hello, Matron Hilda," I greet, giving my best smile.
"You're scooping the gutters for a week," she says and I lower my head. My teeth biting down on my lower lip.
"I'm sorry…"
"I don't want to hear it!" She snaps. "And try me Ashen Drelhart, try me. You'll regret it."
I nod and she adjusts her dress, humps and walks away. I exhale and sit on the stairs. Just when I thought this night was going to end well. The opposite happens. It's always the opposite.
Standing, I climb up the stairs and into the room. It's just one room, with each of us having a different corner with our beds and little belonging but it's enough. At least for the kind of life we're living. The room is quiet, with only the sounds of soft breaths and terrible snores. I smile softly, this is a view you don't get to see everyday. I walk over to my bed space, lay on my bed without bothering to take off clothes. In a matter of seconds, sleep takes over me. Calm and Peaceful.
The next morning comes fast and I'm dragged from the bed by matron Hilda. She releases me when we're in the equipment room. "Pick."
I rub my sleepy eyes and look around. I'm not the only one here. Jacob is there too, he's a bully and I'm not surprised but he's got a swollen eyes so I'm wondering. However, Lyara is here too. She's calm, fights harder but is always in a bad mood. However, I'm wondering what her offense is. She doesn't particularly looks like someone who would cause much trouble.
A slap lands at the back of my head, snapping me from my thoughts. "I said, pick!"
I bend and pick up a rake, rubbing the back of my head which was just slapped.
"To the gutters. Now!" She orders and we follow. The Matron takes a seat and orders us to start.
An hour is passed and I don't see any changes. The gutters still look the same. I glance at Lyara, she's frowning which isn't a new view. My eyes move to Jacob who's seated. I thought we were allowed to sit. As if hearing my thoughts. Matron Hilda stand from her seat, walks up to him and a resounding slap vibrates through the air. I laugh heavily and all eyes move to me.
"What's so funny, Ashen?" Matron ask, folding her arms.
I clear my throat, pretending to cough. "Water, I'm thirsty," I say and cough heavier. She glares at me, eyes me and walks away.
Immediately she leaves, I turn to Lyara and ask. "You're not someone to cause trouble, how did you end up here?" She doesn't reply or acknowledge me. I nod and face my work but after a while I face her again. "Jacob's eyes. You did that, right?" She doesn't still reply.
"Are you always this snobbish or…" Her stick smacks my face before I can complete my sentence. The impact sends me falling into the gutter and hitting the corner of a rusted iron rod sticking out from a broken crate. It slices through my shirt, into my skin and deep enough to make me freeze.
Jacob's laughter fills the whole place, loud and annoying.
Matron Hilda rushes out immediately, her eyes widening as she witnesses the commotion. "What happened here?" She asks.
"He got himself whooped because he's stupid," Jacob answers, laughing in every word.
"He was distracting me," Lyara says. "It's just a little hit. Didn't know he was that weak," she gives me a pitiful look before facing Matron.
I don't yell. I don't even groan. I just climb out from the gutter and face Matron, my smile disappearing. "Are you okay?" Matron ask, her expression shifting to that of concern.
"I'm fine," I say and pick up my rake, starting to scoop the gutter quietly. Jude isn't laughing anymore, he's staring at me in surprise, probably wondering why I'm quiet.
"If you're not okay, you can come have a bath," Matron suggests.
"Yes. You smell," Jude adds, trying so hard to provoke me even further.
"And have me continue the work next time? I'm fine," I say and continue. Lyara joins me afterwards and matron takes a seat. However, I know she's watching me, making sure I don't fall.
It's evening when we finish scooping the gutters. Matron is happy, praises us and promises us extra sauce for dinner. I don't acknowledge it, I make my way to my bed space and pick my bathing items. I'm about leaving the room when a soft voice calls my name.
"Ashen." I pause and turn to her. Her name is Lily, five years old and one of the vibrant kids in the orphanage. Her mother was a mistress to one of the lords in Viremont but lost her life during childbirth. The Lord then cast her away, with the excuse of if she were a male, he would have considered.
"You've got blood on your shirt," she speaks softly. Pointing her little finger on my crimson soaked shirt. Thank goodness it's got a dark color. I wouldn't want the matron all over the place for my sake.
I slowly go down to her height and gently pat her head, a small smile playing on my lips. "I'll go wash it off."
She gasps, covering her mouth with her small fingers. "So it's really blood. Does it hurt?" she ask, her eyes burgee.
I shake my head. "I'm too tough for it," I reply and a bright smile takes over her features. She gives me a thumbs up and says. "I knew you were the tough guy."
I chuckle and straighten up. "I'm leaving to shower. Take care."
She nods, her thumbs still pointed at me. I return the thumbs up and walk away, heading to the bathroom. In the bathroom, I stand before the mirror. Slowly take off my clothes to prevent it from sticking to the injury. I stare at my reflection in the mirror, at the raw—red line behind me. It stinks, the pain excruciating but I did well in hiding my pain. I couldn't let Lyara see me breaking and I didn't want Jacob to have a reason to taunt me.
Here in the bathroom. I just want to scream but someone's next to me and doing that would call for attention so I suck it all in. Have a longer bath like never before, occasionally flinching when I unknowingly touch the injury.
I'm the last to leave the bathroom, and make my room to the general room. It's loud. Too loud with chattering, bickering and running by the children. It's already past bed time and unless the matron comes and spanks some people—me included most of the time. We could stay like this all night.
I head to my bed space, lay on it and pull the blanket over myself. My eyes are close and I force myself to sleep despite the noise from the children and throbbing by my sides. My entire abdomen. And even my head. I grip the pillow tight. The pain in everywhere, down to paralysing my legs.
My eyes snap open when warm hands rests on my shoulder. I sit up immediately, looking at who dares to disrupt my sleep. "You okay?" she asks, her voice softer than I've even heard. Even her expression is different now. No frowning, just there. Worried if I'm to be specific.
"Are you…" I look behind me to see if someone's there but there's no one. I then turn to her, "talking to me?"
Lyara exhales, her fingers twitching. "Look.. I'm sorry about today. I shouldn't have reacted the way I did. It's too much. And look, I even got you hurt."
I nod but not in agreement with what she's saying. In my own version of confusion. "You're sorry?"
She nods, her hand on my shoulder pressing me softly and I wonder when we got so close to touching each other. "No..no," I slap her hand away. "Stop touching me like we're close. We're not. And I don't want us to be. You should go, I don't want to talk to you."
I lie back on the bed, backing her but she doesn't leave. Instead, her hand traces down my abdomen and I jump. "What is your problem?" I shout. My voice coming out raw from both surprise and confusion.
"Show me."
"Huh? Show you what?" I ask. My face tightening and eyes narrowing.
"The injury," she says. Her expression impassive. "I want to know how bad it is."
"Huh?" I ask again in deep confusion and she rolls her eyes like she's had enough of me. Instantly, she drags the covers from my body and pulls my shirt up. My injury on display.
"Stop it!" I snap, forcefully dragging my shirt down. "You may be stronger in combat but I won't have you assault me."
"I just want to help," she says. Her voice relaxed like she didn't just give me a slight panic attack now.
"Well. I don't need your help. You literally attacked me and what was your reason? I provoked you? Distracted you? And yet they preach about how much of a family we are."
She exhales, both her hands coming to rest on her thigh. "I'm sorry. I.. I didn't know you'll fall I.. Jacob pissed me. I was still fuming when.."
"Leave me alone, Lyara. Please," I beg. She looks me, her eyes carrying different emotions I can't place. After a while, a frown comes on her face. The frown I'm so used to and for a while I think she'll punch me. Even though I don't know what I might have done to receive such.
She lowers her gaze instead and stands up. "Fine," she says.
"I just hope you don't die by infection." I don't give a reply to her. I just turn the other way, forcefully grabbing my blanket like it's the reason I'm pissed tonight. I shut my eyes, suppressing the pains on my sides.