Harry,
I'm terrible at card games. So it's impressive that not only do you know how to play, but you managed to teach your friends. Do you gamble when you play? And you described Sevvie as 'the sweetest owl to ever be born' but he pecked me hard enough to leave a scar on my finger so I may have to disagree with you there.
I look forward to your next letter.
-Remus
***
"Mister Potter, may I speak with you for a moment?"
Harry looked up from his bag that he was hastily cramming papers in and nodded.
"Of course Professor," he said. Harry scooped his bag up and walked up to Professor McGonagalls desk.
"Harry, I need to speak with you about your partner," she said slowly. Harry wasn't sure he liked the look on her face. She looked nervous, and it was making him nervous.
"What partner?" he asked.
"Your partner for the Yule Ball."
"Oh. I'm not going," he said with a shrug. He'd listened as McGonagall announced the Yule Ball, but he thought it sounded terrible. Dancing around in posh robes in front of the whole school? A nightmare really. "It's not mandatory, is it?"
"It is for Champions, as you will be opening the ceremony," she said. Which made sense. Because being a champion was brilliant; which meant of course it came along with such a stupid requirement. "And you will need a partner."
"Fine," Harry huffed. "Partner would be the same thing as a date, yeah? Fred will probably go with me."
Probably.
Harry would have to ask him.
"That is what I needed to speak with you about," McGonagall said hesitantly. "Male champions are required to bring a female date."
Harry blinked at her in surprise before quickly clearing his expression.
"That's not fair," he said. "Fred's my boyfriend, why can't he come?"
"I agree, it is unfair and ridiculously outdated," McGonagall sniffed. "I personally would be irate to learn that I could not bring my life partner as my date to a social event. However, it is considered an ancient tradition that dates back to the first tournament and the rules are clear. I am sure Fred will understand," she added kindly. "Perhaps you could bring Miss Bones as a friend instead?"
Harry scowled and scuffed the floor with his boots.
"Can't we just change the rules?" he asked. "Because if you think they're unfair too then maybe Dumbledore will listen to you?"
Knowing Dumbledore though, he'd probably set up the rules just to make what was sure to be a miserable night for Harry even worse.
Stupid old man.
"I tried," McGonagall said, honesty practically oozing from her mouth. "But apparently it would require an entire rewrite of the rule book and all three participating schools would need to agree."
"Fred's going to be furious," he warned her.
"I would never endorse a prank, but perhaps you would kindly inform Mister Weasley that the vote to change the rules regarding same sex dates to the ball was 2-1. And neither Professor Dumbledore nor Headmistress Maxine voted against it."
Harry grinned up at her, the twinkle in her eyes giving away her true intentions with her words.
"Yes ma'am," he said politely. "If that's all?"
"It is. Good luck," she dismissed him.
Harry found his friends waiting for him in the corridor and he immediately pulled them together.
"The Yule Ball is bullshit," he whispered. "Theo- I need you to look up the rules. McGonagall says they say I can't take Fred as a date, can you double check?"
"I'm on it," Theo nodded.
"Do you want me to go with you?" Susan offered.
"Nah," Harry waved off her offer with a small, and thankful, grin. "McGonagall's probably wrong. We found a way around loads of rules before, I'm sure we can again."
In Potions that afternoon, Snape made another announcement about the ball to them all.
"As many of you are aware, Hogwarts is hosting the Yule Ball this year," Snape sneered, as if insulted by the mere idea of a dance. Harry couldn't agree more. "This is meant to be a time to socialize with our foreign guests. However," Snape's eyes rested on each student individually, causing the Gryffindors to squirm in the seats. "This is not an open invitation to embarrass me. You will wear dress robes, you will act as I expect my students to act, and you will be a credit to our school. Is that understood?"
"Yes sir," everyone murmured.
"Excellent. Dismissed."
Everyone began chattering excitedly, everyone except Harry who was feeling irritated by the whole thing.
"Potter- a word."
Harry rolled his eyes and waited, assuming this was more of what McGonagall already told him.
"Yes sir?" he asked politely when he walked up to Snape's desk.
"Has Minerva told you of the rules regarding the champions approved dates to the ball?" Snape asked with a blunt forwardness that Harry appreciated.
"Yeah," Harry rolled his eyes. "Supposedly I can't take Fred. It's bullshit."
"Indeed," Snape nodded his head. "As a side note, I would like to warn you against accepting any food or drinks from female classmates that you are not currently friends with."
"What?" Harry stared at him in genuine surprise. It's not like he would just take food from strangers, but it still seemed like an odd thing for Snape to tell him. "Why?"
"Because events like this tend to cause students to lose their heads," Snape said drily. "And without fail, I find many students, male and female alike, to become unwilling victims of love potions."
"Ugh," Harry curled his nose in disgust. "That's messed up."
"Quite," Snape's lips twitched in amusement. "I simply thought I should warn you, as undoubtedly there will suddenly be many female students wishing to hang on your arm at this sham of an event."
Harry rolled his eyes at him once Snape dismissed him. It was absurd that Fred liked him, it would be pure madness for anyone else to ask him out.
At dinner that night, Theo slammed down the thickest book Harry had ever seen and scowled ferociously at it.
"This is bullshit," he said, repeating Harry's exact words from earlier. "The rule book for the whole tournament. And it specifically says all students can only bring a partner of the opposite sex."
"That's outrageous!" Draco said.
"Almost as bad as people thinking bloodlines matter," Susan smirked. "Wild concept, isn't it?"
Harry ignored his now bickering friends and looked beseechingly at Fred.
"I don't know what to do," he admitted. "McGonagall said I have to have a date. I'd look like a prat dancing by myself. But we can't go together."
"It's fine," Fred told him with a lopsided grin. "I'm not mad. It's hardly your fault, is it?"
"But..." Harry glanced around and, reassured by his still arguing friends, lowered his voice slightly. "But I don't want you to go with some twit," he admitted.
"I won't," Fred told him. "I don't have to have a date, you do. So you find some lucky gal to hang on your arm for the Ball and then we can laugh about it later."
Harry watched Fred carefully while he said that, and saw the tightness in his eyes that meant he was probably feeling more hurt by this than he was letting on.
"You shouldn't go alone," Harry sighed. "This sucks. But you shouldn't go by yourself if I'm taking someone. That's not fair."
"Alright," Fred shrugged and looked at Luna. "Will you be my date to the Yule Ball Miss Lovegood?"
"Oh I can't," she said with a sweet smile. "Draco already asked me."
Harry spun his head to look at Draco, who was now blushing terribly.
"I thought we'd go as friends," Draco said with his hands raised. "Otherwise she can't go, and I don't really have anyone specific I'd want to go with anyway."
Harry squinted at Draco and watched him squirm beneath his stare.
"You're going to be nice to her all night long," Susan cut in sternly. "You will get her drinks, dance with her, and make it the best night ever. Do you understand me Draco Lucius Malfoy?"
"Yes ma'am," Draco said with a mock salute. "Best night ever, right Luna?"
"Right," Luna smiled at him and Harry was pleased to see her look so happy. Of course if Draco fucked it up, he'd bash his blonde head in the wall.
"Miss Granger- me and you then?" Fred winked at Hermione, causing Theo to immediately scowl.
"No," Theo practically growled. "Hermione is going to be my date to the ball Weasley."
"He's teasing you Theo," Hermione sighed, although she looked rather pleased as well. "Everyone knows we're going together."
"Blimey. I knew we needed more girl friends," Ron grumbled. "I dunno who I'm supposed to ask."
"Am I not a girl?" Susan asked harshly.
"Uh..." Ron glanced at Blaise, who shook his head slightly. "Well, I figured you'd go with Harry? Also-"
"Also you're a bit terrifying," Blaise laughed. "So no, you don't really count."
"I accept your reasoning," Susan said pompously. "But Harry told me he didn't need me to go with him, and then Johnny asked me. But-" she glanced at Harry and raised her brows, "I can tell him to piss off and go with you instead if you want?"
"No," Harry slumped down at that. Dancing with Susan would have been fine. Harry was used to her touching him. But he knew she liked Johnny, so it would be selfish to ask her to give him up for himself. "That's not fair. Go with Johnny. But tell him I'll kill him if he's rude to you, yeah?"
"Like she'd need you to do that," Neville grinned. "Susan would just kill him herself."
"I would," Susan nodded. "But he said he thinks I'm 'a force', so I doubt he'd try anything," she smirked.
"Which means we still need dates," Ron moaned.
"We'll find someone," Blaise said bracingly. "I'm sure we can charm up a few witches to be our dates for the evening, right Neville?"
"Er..."
"Not you too!" Harry cried. "Who are you going with then?"
Neville sat up straight and looked right at Fred and Ron.
"I'd like to ask Ginny. But since you two are my friends, I wanted to make sure you wouldn't be mad first."
Ron and Fred glanced at each other, and got identically mischievous smiles on their faces.
"That's pretty chivalrous of you Neville," Ron smirked.
"Of course we wouldn't mind if such a brave and gallant young man took Ginny to the ball," Fred said.
"Why would we mind?" Ron asked.
"She's only our baby sister..."
"Only girl in the family..."
"Our Mums favorite..."
"Why would we worry?"
Neville gulped but bravely kept watching the two scheming Weasley's.
"What are your intentions with our sister?" Fred asked solemnly. "Marriage?"
"A family?" Ron raised his brows.
"Sex?" Fred growled in a way that Harry thought wasn't actually part of their act.
"No! Merlin! No!" Neville turned a bright shade of red. "I just- she talks to me sometime in the common room, and she's only a third year, so she can't go without an older date. And she said she was staying at Hogwarts for Christmas so I thought I'd ask her. As friends. Merlin."
"Fine," Fred waved his fork threateningly at Neville. "But if you treat her badly, I'm letting Susan take care of you."
"Doubtful," Susan scoffed. "I don't work for you Frederick."
"Brill," Harry groaned. "So Fred needs a date. Ron needs one. Blaise needs one. And I need one. Nobody's going to want to go with me, everyone knows I'm dating Fred."
Harry's friends all glanced at each other and immediately began laughing in a way that made Harry's hand twitch in annoyance.
"What's so funny then?" he demanded.
"Harry," Luna smiled softly at him. "There's going to be a whole line of witches just waiting to ask you to the ball."
"But- why?" Harry asked, genuinely confused. "They know I'm dating Fred, yeah?"
"They won't care," Hermione rolled her eyes. "They'll think they can make you change your mind."
"Disgusting," Fred said cheerfully. "Witches are brutal."
"You guys are mad," Harry scoffed. "I'm going to end up showing up alone and dancing with McGonagall."
Harry's friends laughed again and he grit his teeth as he swore that he would find a way to hex nine people simultaneously.
***
Lupin,
McGonagall says I can't take Fred to the Yule Ball. Some bullshit rules that say that you can't have a 'same sex date'. I figure it's kind of like when your parents wouldn't have liked Black, yeah? Anyway, that's what I'm doing this week. I have to find a date. Which sucks. Because Luna, Mione, and Susan already have dates. And I dunno if anyone will ask me or go with me since everyone knows I'm dating Fred.
Also Sevvie is just misunderstood. He's got an owl heart of gold. He probably pecked you because he doesn't like you. Can't imagine why.
-Harry.
***
To Harry's amazement, his friends wound up being right. The very next morning, during breakfast, a curly haired, third year, Hufflepuff girl came up to him and asked him to go with her.
"No," Harry said shortly. The girl walked off looking rather dejected and Susan scowled at him.
"She's very nice you know," she said.
"She asked me right in front of everyone!" Harry exclaimed. "That's mad! It was probably a joke or something."
"Being oblivious is not charming," Hermione said with a small grin. "Harry, you're very fanciable. I'd bet that she was just the first of many."
Harry could feel himself tensing up at the very thought, but, of course, Hermione was right again.
As she usually was.
Which was annoying.
By dinner that night four more witches asked him. Including Pansy Parkinson, who Harry had once snapped her wand in half.
"I know we haven't always gotten along, but I'd like to go with you," she batted her dark eyelashes at Harry in the most annoying way possible.
"Piss off," Harry had snarled, turning and stomping away in the opposite direction.
"She probably knows how to dance," Draco said at dinner after Harry told his friends about it. "Her parents have had her in dance classes her whole life."
"She called me a disgusting orphan," Harry sneered. "No."
Harry was starting to hate girls. They were all just so giggly and annoying.
"Have you lot found dates yet?" he asked Fred, Viktor, Blaise, and Ron.
"I decided I'm definitely going stag," Fred said with a grin. "Then I'm free to dance with you as soon as your 'champion obligations' are done."
"I have not," Viktor frowned down at his drink. "Vitches are hard to ask."
"You're an international superstar," Susan sighed exasperated. "I'm sure anyone you ask will say yes."
"Hey! I've got an idea!" Fred, shockingly, smiled at Viktor. "There's a girl on my quidditch team, Katie Bell, and she's mad about quidditch! Smart as a whip too! And she's pretty! You could ask her. Then you could go with George and Angelina, and Lee and Alicia. A whole group of quidditch fanatics!"
Viktor brightened at that, but Harry scowled just a bit. Why wouldn't Fred have told him about Katie? He'd met her a few times before, she would have been fine for him to ask to the ball. It would have been uncomfortable to dance with her, but better than the nothing he had now.
"I vill do that," Viktor nodded gratefully at Fred. "Vank you."
"Anytime." Fred winked at Harry and then noticed his dark look. "What?"
"I would have asked Katie," he said, crossing his arms irritably. "Then me you and her could have hung out, yeah?"
"Oh," Fred's face fell a bit and he shrugged in a helpless sort of way. "I didn't think of that. Sorry Darlin."
"Vould you like to ask her?" Viktor grunted. "I do not mind."
"No," Harry sighed, a bit dramatically, at yet another suitable date being snagged away. "You should ask her Viktor, I met her once at a party and she's nice enough. You'll have a good time."
Honestly. This dance was becoming more drama than it was worth. And it was putting Harry in the awkward position where he'd have to ask someone for something, which he hated doing.
"Harry the dance is a week away," Susan said gently. "Just ask someone or accept the next invite you get, we both know you'll get more."
Harry scowled at that, but the problem that they didn't realize was:
1- It was bullshit rules that put him in this position and Harry hated rules that didn't have any reasoning behind them.
2- He didn't want to dance with someone else because they would probably touch him and he hated that too.
And 3- He didn't actually want to go if he couldn't go with Fred.
"I will," he grumbled. "Eventually."
"Better hurry Harry, even Ron has a date," Draco smirked.
"What?!" Harry gaped at Ron, whose ears were now red despite his pleased look. "Who?!"
"Parvati Patil," he said. "Blaise is taking her sister Padma so we're all going together."
"You could ask Lavender Brown," Blaise said. "I don't think she has a date yet."
"Neither does Daphne," Theo said. "She'd love to go with you."
Harry grimaced at those options and pushed his plate away, suddenly no longer hungry.
"This is bullshit," he said for the fiftieth time since the ball was announced. "Absolute bullshit."
***
Harry,
I agree that the rules surrounding the Yule Ball are disturbing, unfair, and, as you said, absolutely bullshit. Have you found a date yet? If not, I would advise you to just ask a girl who seems kind and who respects your current relationship.
I mentioned the blatant discrimination to your godfather, leaving out any reference to your letter, and he said: "Harry and Fred should just dance together anyway. What are they going to do? Expel them?"
While I personally believe it may be easiest to simply find a nice girl to take for the evening, you should do what you are comfortable with.
Good luck, I can't wait to hear who you've taken.
-Remus
***
Harry read Lupin's letter thoughtfully over breakfast. With only three days until the Ball, he did need to figure something out.
"'Arry?"
Harry looked up from his letter and was surprised to see Fleur Delacour standing beside their table.
"Fleur," he smiled up at her. "How are you?"
"I am well," she smiled. "May I speak with you? Perhaps in private?"
"Oui," Harry grinned. "Lead the way my Lady."
Harry followed Fleur out to the steps of Hogwarts. It was beginning to get really frigid out, they had even had a light snowfall the night before. Which added to the overall magical appearance of the lawns.
"'Arry, would you be my date to the ball?" Fleur asked with a bright smile. "I know you 'ave a paramour, but as you cannot take 'im- we could go together, no?"
"I-" Harry was caught by surprise and flexed his hand a few times while he thought about it. "Yeah, yeah, okay. That would be brill Fleur. As friends, right?"
"Oui," Fleur beamed at him. "As friends."
Harry rejoined his friends with a bemused smile.
"What did Fleur want?" Hermione asked him.
"She wanted to ask me to the ball," Harry shrugged. "I told her yeah."
Apparently his friends were all as surprised as Harry was, because they all stared at him in shock.
"Fleur Delacour asked you to the ball?" Blaise asked in a choked voice.
"As friends," Harry told him.
"And you said yes?!" Ron asked.
"Why wouldn't I?"
"Yeah, why wouldn't he? Fleur's gorgeous," Susan said. "She's very smart and powerful too. I'm sure you guys will have a great night together Harry."
Harry nodded, then twitched slightly when Fred pushed his plate abruptly away and got up and left.
"What's his problem?" Harry asked.
"He's jealous," Blaise said. "Fleur's gorgeous and she's going with his boyfriend."
"He told me to find a date," Harry said. "So I did. So what's the problem?"
"Honestly," Hermione huffed. "Harry, Fred doesnt want you to go alone, but he's still feeling insecure that you're going with Fleur. Give him some space, he'll be fine."
"I dunno, Fred's weird," Ron said.
"He is not fuckin' weird," Harry scowled.
"No, not weird," Ron said hastily. "I mean, he likes you a lot, you know? And Fred's always been pretty open about liking blokes, so he's probably just mad about having to hide it. That's all."
"Yeah..." Harry looked down at Lupin's letter again and furrowed his brows thoughtfully. "I actually need to go find Snape. I'll catch up with you guys later."
Harry walked slowly to Snape's office, debating on the best way to ask him the favor he'd need.
"Come in," Snape called when Harry knocked.
"It's me," Harry said absently as he clutched the letter in one hand. "Can I ask you a question?"
"Of course." Snape didn't smile, but he did look to be in a good mood. "What can I do for you?"
"Er..." Harry looked around as he tried to find a way to word it just right. "Will you be mad if one of the Slytherin's embarrasses you at the Ball?"
"Are you planning on embarrassing me?" Snape asked warily. "Because I would prefer you to not."
"I dunno, not embarrass you exactly. But... I think you might be mad at me."
"Explain," Snape sighed.
"I don't want to dance with Fleur," Harry blurted. "I'd rather dance with Fred, if I have to dance at all. Which- McGonagall says I do. And I don't want someone I don't know grabbing on me while we dance, it's weird. So I'm going to find a way to take Fred, so nobody's upset or jealous, but then you're going to be upset, yeah?"
Snape ran a weary hand across his face and slumped back in his chair.
"Inform me of your precise plan, if you would," he said.
"I don't have one," Harry admitted. "Not yet. But I'm going to get one."
"Will you be informing me of it before you do it?"
"If it means we aren't going to fight and you aren't going to be mad, then yeah."
Snape nodded curtly.
"Keep in mind as you are plotting- that change is difficult to implement. Yet I believe you are cunning enough to find a subtle way to do so. Understood?"
"Yes sir," Harry nodded as well and grinned over at Snape. He was a decent bloke. "Hey thanks for not hating me for dating Fred."
"Why on Earth would I hate you?" Snape asked, surprised. "Frederick is a chaotic monster in his own right, but your relationships are your business as long as they are safe, consensual, and make you happy."
"Well, Lupin said his parents wouldn't have liked him being gay, but I didn't even know that was a thing until recently. And Karkaroff wouldn't vote for a change in the rules, so I guess people are still weird about it. Which I didn't know. So... so thanks for not being weird about it."
"Go," Snape actually had part of his mouth curled up in a smile now. "Go and find a way to enlighten the Wixen community of the many differing sexualities, yes?"
"Yes sir," Harry grinned. "Wish me luck."
Harry immediately ran off to find his friends and missed Snape's quietly spoken well wishes.
"Susan, Theo, Blaise- we need a plan," Harry said once he found his friends huddled up in the Slytherin common room.
"I'm in," Susan said without hesitation.
"What plan?" Theo asked hesitantly.
"Why can't I help?" Draco whined.
"You can all help, but we have to think quick," Harry said. "We're finding a way I can take Fred to the ball."
"But you already told Fleur you'd take her," Luna said softly. "She'll be upset if you change your mind."
Fuck.
Harry hadn't considered that.
"Find Fleur a new date," Hermione said. "She knew you were dating Fred, right? So just tell her that you're finding a way around the rules and you'd rather her find a date that she can have fun with as well."
"Lue- will that work?" Harry asked. Luna was the one who brought it up, so she'd probably know best.
"I think if you do it very kindly it will," Luna said thoughtfully. "Maybe mention how beautiful and smart she is though, just to ease the pain of rejection."
"Brill."
"How are we doing this then?" Susan asked, her eyes lit up with excitement.
"Subtly," Harry said seriously. "Snape won't be pissed if I'm subtle he says."
"Boo, fine," Susan rolled her eyes.
"I've got an idea," Theo said. "It's subtle, but sends a message. And you can dance with Fred."
"Let's hear it," Harry said. His excitement for the ball rose exponentially once Theo explained and the gang tweaked a few minor details.
"It's perfect!" Harry declared. "As long as Snape isn't pissed."
And when Harry hurried and told Snape the plan- Snape wasn't pissed at all. In fact, he said he was proud of Harry for standing up for what he believed in. Which, was weird. Because Harry just didn't want to upset Fred or dance with Fleur. But he supposed it was still nice of Snape to say.
"Fleur, could I talk to you?"
Harry had finally tracked Fleur down in the halls and was feeling terrible for what he was about to do. Fleur was nice, and the more they talked the more Harry liked the witch, but Fred was his and she wasn't. It was an easy choice.
Even if he felt bad about it.
"Of course 'Arry," she smiled.
"Fleur... I..." Harry gripped his knife handle in his pocket and drew courage from it. "I can't take you to the ball. I'm sorry. It's-"
"It eez your paramour, yes?" Fleur said. "'E does not wish for you to take another?"
"Kind of," Harry admitted. "But I would be mad if he was dancing with someone else too. And," Harry leaned forward and tried to smile charmingly, "we're going to find a way around the rules so he can go with me."
"Zat is excellenté," Fleur said, sounding genuinely happy. "Eet is unfair you could not. We would never have zis problem at Beauxbatons, no?"
"The French are better than us Brits in almost every way," Harry winked, using a phrase he'd heard Snape say before. "Are you mad? Because I can help you find someone nice to go with."
"'Arry," Fleur smiled and her blue eyes were twinkling with amusement. "I 'ave 'ad dozens of wizards ask me, zey do believe me to be rather attractive. I zink I can 'andle finding a date."
"Dozens?" Harry asked, surprised. "Fleur, you shouldn't go with someone that just asks you because you're pretty. They should know you're a genius too, okay?"
Fleur's already bright smile intensified at that and she shocked Harry by leaning forward and kissing him on the cheek quickly.
"Zank you for saying that 'Arry, your paramour eez a lucky man."
"He is," Harry agreed with a grin. "But I'll tell him you said that, yeah?"
Fleur's tinkling laugh followed Harry as he pulled his map out to find Fred.
Who, luckily, was alone in the owlery.
Harry raced up there, keeping an eye on Fred's dot to make sure he didn't leave before Harry got there.
"Fred!" Harry burst in the owlery and surprised Fred, who had been leaning against the window looking out at the clear cold sky. "Hey! Go to the ball with me?"
"Funny," Fred quipped with a small, fake, grin.
"No really," Harry stepped closer to him and looked up earnestly at him. "Go to the ball with me."
"How?" Fred asked. "The rules say we can't."
"Fred," Harry grinned mischievously, "how would you like to play the greatest prank ever on Hogwarts?"
Fred's matching grin was all the confirmation Harry needed.
***
Lupin,
I took your advice. Well, Black's advice. I'm taking Fred to the Ball. So basically this week all I've done is deal with a bunch of girls asking me out and make plans for the ball. I was going to go with Fleur but I'd rather go with Fred. So we're going together. But we're 'subverting the rules with the subtlety befitting of a Slytherin' (Snape's words, not mine). Anyway, guess I'll write afterwards and tell you how it went.
-Harry.
***
Rita Skeeter, This is Harry Potter. I was wondering how you would feel about coming to Hogwarts for the Yule Ball? I'm sure the Contessa would be pleased if you would come and write a story about a bullshit ridiculous rule that my boyfriend and I will be protesting against. Best wishes,
Harry James Potter, Heir Potter-Black, ally to the Contessa Zabini of Italy.