Kunais are so lovely.
I love them. They're pretty big in my hands, pretty cold too, made of bad metal, probably all coming out from the same factory, well, since we're in the times of old maybe it's handmade? Well, maybe, maybe not, I don't know, but if it is, it just makes me love kunais even more.
They're just so perfect.
They fit my little hands perfectly, not a lot of weapons fit a kid hand, it's hard to find something that fits you when you're a meter tall, but sometimes you do, when knives and daggers doesn't fit you, when it's just a sidearm for other people, sometimes, a man trash is another man treasure, and kunais?
Kunais?
They are my treasure.
I can move them around, turn them around, twirl them around, juggle them around, take more than one in my pockets, jump with them, run with them, dig them into the neck of Matsuoko Hidefumi and slowly make him two new scars that carves blood out of his skin and make sure he can do nothing but gurgle and scream in pain as he sees his grandchild staring him straight into his soul while his own soul finally leaves him, finally, finally, because FUCKING FINALLY, he should have died way earlier, preferably before I was even born. But apparently? My drunk of a father was always a dumb piece of shit without a spine that can't fight against his own father, something I don't have a problem with, this, I don't.
I won't. Not with my crossbow
He won't be able to see me. I don't think you get it, he won't be able to see me. Literally, I'm invisible. And when he comes back from his drinking session, like every fucking day like trash like trash like the fucking trash he is, the trash that DOESN'T KNOW PAIN, I KNOW PAIN ME! I KNOW, I LIVED THROUGH SO MUCH, EVERYDAY, EVERYTIME, I LIVED THROUGH PAIN AND HE DOESN'T KNOW IT, CALLING ME WEIRD AND WEIRD AND I'M NOT FUCKING WEIRD! I WANT TO SEE YOU IN MY FUCKING SITUATION YOU DISGUSTING HORRIBLE PIECE OF SHIT, WE'LL SEE IF YOU DON'T WORM AROUND AND LOOK "WEIRD" WHEN I CLOCK CROSSBOW BOLTS INTO ALL OF YOUR LIMBS AND PIN YOU AGAINST THE GROUND, WE'LL SEE IF YOU DON'T WRITHE AND CRY TOO, WE'LL SEE IF YOU DON'T DO OR SAY ANYTHING WEIRD WHEN I'M SKINNING YOU ALIVE AND HAVING FUN SHOVING SENBONS IN YOUR FUCKING EYES JUST LIKE MY PAIN INFUSE MY EYES, YOU WANT TO FEEL WHAT I FEEL AND KNOW WHY I'M WEIRD YOU DUMB PIECE OF SH-!
My eyes open.
Not because of the sun, no, that wouldn't make sense. After all, the sun can't reach me here.
The sun doesn't manage to parse through my window, makes sense really, it can't parse through my wooly blanket, the one usually on my body, the one I use to tucker myself in before sleeping, it's a tight blanket, a heavy blanket, it's warm, hot, warm, hot, and that's why I'm cold now, but it doesn't matter because it hides everyone from looking inside my room, it's plastered on my wall now, two kunais on the corners slamming and plastering it over the window to make sure I can't look out, nor anyone can look in and see the armory in my room.
I'm a baby. I'm two years old, and I have an armory in my room. Don't ask.
Because if you do I'll be forced to talk to you about my loot, about all the things I gathered. And there's a lot.
There's a lot, usually, in my room there's only a single box, in there there's my resources I need to improve, my stolen books, my pen, my handheld mirror my mother gave me and even the clothes that still belongs to me, no matter how tight they're becoming, now too short for a growing boy like me and my mom is too busy sucking cocks to gain ryos to fix my clothes or create me new ones, may need to steal some. There's also my cloak who's over the box, draped over it, that's how I dry it, it's always wet when I come back from the outside, that's the problem with living in a country that always rain.
You're always drenched with this disgusting rain.
But that's not all there is, apart from the kunais keeping the blanket tight around the window, the points digging into the wooden wall and definetly scarring it, there's more weapons.
All in boxes. The keys from the owner is still beside my bed -blankets and pillows thrown on the ground- around said bed, boxes, filled with kunais, senbons, shurikens, -different types of shurikens too. There are big ones, there are small ones, some with different styles, some with two short spikes, some with three short spikes, other with two holes instead of one- daggers, bolts for my trusty crossbow who's beside my bed too, a weird kind of sharp wire bunched up, and other miscellaneous weapons I can't even use yet.
Thinking about those weapons, just like that, just while looking around, I can see all the weapons that will, or may, be useful to me in the future, but not now.
There's a bow, for when my arms get strong enough to carry it, and more importantly, pull it.
There's swords, a katana for when I'm an adult and ready to duke it out, and also the small looking one that seems way more grippable for someone my size -still too big though-
There's daggers, different types, some long, some shorts, some really long, some sharp, some really pointy.
There's armor too, not good armor, not even some I can use, just took some cause really... I could, but I'm kind of regretting it now. It was hard to drag them home.
It was hard to pass an entire night under the rain, filling up boxes again and again while my heart threatened to leap out of my chest whenever I saw a shadow move on the corner of my vision, it was pretty hard, every box I moved and decided to drag back home while scared of being seen was easily above my while bodyweight. It was hard, even if my invisibility made my boxes and me invisible, it was hard, it was especially harder considering that I haven't slept for three -four really- days straight at the time.
Eh, who am I kidding? I'M NOT REGRETTING SHIT! I SLEPT SO FUCKING WEEEEELLLL!
What if the guy's poor now!? My eyes land on his personal economy, his ryos stash, SO MUCH RYOS! I'M RICH, I CAN EAT MEAT EVERYDAY WITHOUT STEALING FOR IT!
And I also have weapons! I have bows, a crossbow, two kunais under my pillow, one in my hand I keep close like a plushie -it really reassures me, I like it- and boxes FILLED with weapons!
I can finally defend myself!
I think...?
Well, I need to learn how to use all of that.
But as my head falls down on my comfortable pillow once again, melting in it, the kunai in my hand more comfortable than anything I ever held in this life, as it falls and I look around my room once again, filled with boxes, two heavy boxes blocking my door and making sure no one can open it without making a shit ton of noise and alert me.
As it falls, I can't help but have a dreamy and funny -to me- thought.
I was a bit greedy yesterday.
(If some didn't notice yet, nebe has some...issues. And in this chapter, and the last ones, I've been particularly pressing on that to make it quite obvious. How do you feel about those SUBTLE hints? Does he feels crazy enough yet?)