Having night terrors sucked they leave me a shivering mess like I had just been defrosted and crying out in a panic upon escaping them.
Baelon had noticed after being woken repeatedly in the middle of the night multiple days a week. This would be very normal from having a baby in the room but I hadn't woken him up even once since my birth. Just having some self control was the only condition for me to meet with over thirty years of adult memories in my head having lived a whole life it wasn't difficult to keep noise down and not wake him.
Though with these night terrors I couldn't just snap out of it and not cry out. As it was more a mental struggle then a physical one and the battlefield was in my mind.
The passing of days, then weeks blended together the worst parts of it running me through very few hour's of sleep days, coupled with constant interruptions in sleep even when I didn't wake up fearful of my time asleep. The only thing that kept Vilda from advising Baelon to have a Maester look at me upon his return from Dragonstone was my continued strong appetite and the worst of things seeming to pass after a fortnight.
It had taken two months for all the night terrors and then the following less tormenting nightmares to finally become infrequent. Now three months later they had all but stopped only popping up on emotionally low days, where I hadn't done something even remotely fun in weeks and not giggled in even longer.
When had my last laugh been?
Sometimes I would wake in the darkness once again, believing I was back in the womb. Pushing out with my arms and legs to carefully check with my limbs. The answer was always the same of course, that I had left the womb nearly a year ago and was able to move around more than I used to. My bed doubling as an enclosure combined with my baby limbs didn't allow for much crawling around though once placed on the ground I could give a good go at zooming around at the speed of ….. well not very fast. Still it got me out practicing and relearning motor controls in my new body.
Just a new prison with less restrictive walls but more importantly my eyes were working much better than my early days , I was thankful it made me feel less alone and allowed a drift of focus to my surroundings and the goings on in the Keep. Hearing of distant news of the kingdoms in the form of gossip that I would hear snippets of in conversations between servants and visiting family members.
Reaching one years old looked promising, though after the death of my mother my confidence has been at an all time low. Troubled by my thoughts on the words I'd read of the story I was currently within and the multitude of ways I could be confined by laws or my Royal princely duties.
The need for confidence has slowly become nonexistent at this point though as it was fast approaching my birthd- first name day as it's called in Westeros. The celebration will be my first one I'm attending as well if only for a short while, considering my baby stamina and going to a feast before your first name day is probably quite rare. Even with not being normal with all of my previous life's memories doesn't change the stamina of a baby.
Baelon mentioned maybe it was best for me to skip it when the idea was brought up by the King and Queen.
They were visiting me when they brought up it up.
That day was moving along as any other until they arrived at the door. I threw them some smiles upon their approach in thanks for the kind visit, they had checked in on me more consistently after mother died even though they were surely busy ruling the realm.
Alysanne was the main push for my attendance along with support from Jaehaerys convincing Baelon enough that he felt comfortable enough with the idea. When the King along with the Queen left for their duties with Baelon leaving soon after, it left me to ruminate on my feelings of Baelon. It was very hard to mentally connect with the idea of him being my father though my feelings on him were less complicated as at the end of the day he had cherished Alyssa dearly. Whilst my love for her was for a caring, loving mother and we both still held those feelings with us that was what mattered the most to me.
Alyssa was cremated as is the Targaryen custom then her ashes were interred on Dragonstone not being there for the funeral as Baelon feared over my health even though understandable was a bitter pill to swallow. It could have been a multitude of reasons maybe he viewed my nightmares, young age or something else I don't know about to be too much of a concern. Not being strong enough for travel on a boat there and back from Dragonstone was maybe on his mind it could have been just that simple.
Being all but totally alone after mother's death was not fun, I suppose. My memory of that first month and half after was pretty blurry. I hadn't gotten much sleep and what I did get was not restful.
The feelings of those times were still with me to be truthful they had lessened a bit but not by much. The usual instinctual feeling alongside the heartache, that those feelings would never truly leave me. The same ones you get after someone you loved had passed was slumbering away within my heart like a rock settled in my chest.
Knowing Alyssa for such a short amount of time did not lessen the heart ache that it gave me upon her passing it just increased the confusion. For the short time that I was with her, through out her struggle and the following fight for her life. She spent that time being a mother checking up on me when I was brought to her and asking Baelon as well as the midwife Vilda how I had been doing when her condition worsened.
Those memories will never fade.
The name day celebration was is in a couple of weeks, Baelon and Alysanne will be my main chaperones keeping an eye on me through out the event. It will be hosted in the Queen's Ballroom within Maegor's Holdfast so thankfully a less of a public celebration but more of a family feast. Which will be a blast for me I'll be able to meet, well more like see so many characters I had only read about.
My brothers will also be there of course, speaking of my brothers, Viserys still visits me on occasion but Daemon has all but stopped probably over his loss at such a young age. I wouldn't know I can't ask him even if I had a want to.
The treating Daemon with at minimum common courtesy followed by kindness will be difficult for me but I won't know what could have been if I don't at least try to be civil and less prejudiced. It's easier after acknowledging they are not a character but a person who is a part of this world one who I'm living practically next door to for the next few years at least.
Guess it's one of the negatives of knowing of a persons future when they are just a child. Before they become grown adults, what they do as well as how they conduct themselves in the future negatively impacts my view of them now. Trying to temper those feelings will be a essential skill for the future with all the people I will meet whilst also remembering everyone is only human including myself.
Any feeling of taking the high road or a holier-than-thou attitude will be taken and thrown away nobody is perfect. Mistakes happen picking the wrong choice out of all the much worse choices is some people's reality and everyone has bad days.
The beginning of that training will be on my name day, meeting all those family members of mine.
Well the only thing left to do is to think on who is going to be there ages coupled with known identifiable features.
Having been looking forward to solid food for a while it was sad when my first attempt ended in failure. With help from Vilda I tried some solid food after being weaned on purees for a while but could not keep it down. I guess my body isn't ready for solid foods yet the rough birth might have had a hand in my weakened stomach. For now it's still only liquids I'll escape liquid hell someday I swear it!!
The bright morning sun woke me up once again and I'm of two minds. On the one hand I'm obviously glad to have made it to my first name day a whole year that Aegon lives is a different thing within this universe but on the other hand. Am I supposed to feel like the other foot is about to drop? It feels safe enough, let's just hope things continue on like this for many years to come.
Looking around the room nothing much has changed since my first morning here, though it does feel a lot more empty and I don't think that will change anytime soon. The midwife Vilda will bring me to the start of the preparations in the Queens hall then back to sleep. Then once I've gotten plenty of rest Baelon will take me to the beginning of the celebration so that well wishes can be given then the feast beginnings. Alysanne can then perform a type of formality with the family in the majority all attending she can present me and show off that there is another Targaryen in the family.
Now to wait for the wet nurse to arrive have my fill then it's off to explore and see the sights of the Red Keep.
Curtains, I will much prefer thicker curtains or something else to cover the windows in the future in my room. Being able to wake up as the sun rises is pretty useful but being able to shut the curtains and tell your body to relax and lower the energy levels is also helpful. The body then understands that once certain factors come into play e.g. darkness and the wrapping up of the body in bed. That it is time for sleep at least that's what works for me, implementing a consistent sleep schedule helps a lot in life.
Allowing you to plan out the day and alleviate some stress from busy days. Oooop the wet nurse is here, once having my fill Vilda takes me out of the room, then through long winding corridors and after that heading outside. Being the first time I'm out and about outside I rushed to take it all in moving my head about in a little bit quicker baby movement speed.
Athough Vilda walked fast I still spotted courtyards, gardens, watchtowers, alcoves, gazebos and a cornerfort. All of that to then get stun locked by how big Maegor's Holdfast was reading about it can't compare at all, massive thick walls then the moat with spikes. Just when I was going over the bridge to enter with Vilda who I've nicknamed 'the strong' because this place was intimidating as hell. I spot my first Kingsguard billowing white cloak, shining armour and everything. No clue who it was with black hair combined with a greying beard.
A stalwart man to be sure face rigid, eyes gazing about whilst taking us in then with a simple nod he let us pass. Scary dude would be cool to learn the sword from him when I'm older no one better to be trained by than a skilled Kingsguard.
Upon entering the battlefield known as dinner never mind not dinner yet, I've got food on the brain probably because I haven't had any proper food in a year. The Queen's ballroom was laid out with a few empty tables pushed into the centre as paintings, carpets and tapestries were being used for decorations alongside the relocating of some braziers for the evening.
Targaryen colours were used tastefully not to over influence the rest but it was easily handled by the skilled players, oh I mean the skilled staff and with Alysanne managing it all at the head made it look like a game with the Dragon currently leading everyone. Though the game can be predicted and planned for there are players that can cheat so I suppose I'm not so unique in that.
We didn't stay long but Vilda used this chance to take me through some of the smaller courtyards outside then through some gardens ending with a quiet arrival at the Great Hall. Tons of petitioners were being held at court by Jaehaerys with courtiers filling in the sides of the hall capable of holding a thousand. Vilda held me close whilst looking around, we didn't enter though so no idiots could bother me. The throne as well as the king was too far through the crowd to get a good look at so that sight will have to wait.
We were lying low because to come over and bother a Targaryen child is not beneath the dignity most nobles actually have. Greedy for more as well as crazy good at sniffing out weaknesses like a merchant when he smells opportunity to gain some more money some players don't have limits to the lengths they will go for power. Most players will poke, prod or verbally attack until such a time where you tell them to fuck off in a myriad of ways. There is a variety of things honour can buy you but the chance to collect on any occasion in this universe is very rare for nobles and even rarer for the people or as they are called in Westeros the Smallfolk.
After my midday nap Baelon arrived in the afternoon to dress me up in a red and black garb a bit stifling for my small body but not too uncomfortable compared to my everyday garments.
Upon my return to the Queen's Ballroom they had filled the once empty tables with a ridiculous amount of food similar looking to the feasts at a certain wizarding school. The bright flames that lined the walls seemed emboldened by the coming night and blazed even brighter. The light is always enhanced when surrounded in darkness, well visually any way maybe it was just the trick of some of the mirrors in here.
The family wasn't spread out as much as I thought they would have been. It took me a few minutes to count them then try to double check how many were supposed to still be alive from memory.
Queen Alysanne calls out "There he is the reason for such celebration, bring him in Baelon so that everyone can meet him." A large smile was across her face with the edges of her eyes ending with two crows feet either side.
There was of course the King and Queen. My brothers, Baelon, Aemon his wife Jocelyn Baratheon. Their daughter Rhaenys who should have claimed Meleys by now. The marriage with Corlys Velaryon will be in a few years I think, oh and Alysanne's youngest child Gael the 'winter child' called such from how old the Queen was when she had her which was in her forties.
The silver-gold alongside platinum white hair with purple eyes was in the majority matching the Valyrian features but Rhaenys did not have silver hair because of her Baratheon mother the 'blood tells' or if you prefer the 'seed is strong'.
The no shows are Septa Maegelle who joined the faith though she did seemingly keep in contact with her mother and father helping reconcile the two at least twice. Definitely no Saera as well as Vaegon and no Viserra Targaryen who I presume died earlier in the year though I haven't heard anything of her.
Gael seems slightly different than how she was described but I could just be mistaken.
Gael was six years old her name day was the third day of the eleventh moon within a months time she will turn seven. Rhaenys is aged thirteen within a few years she will marry the sea snake Corlys Velaryon at aged sixteen I think.
Aemon got up from his chair to approach and see Aegon.
"Brother let me see my nephew, waiting for his first name day to come before introducing him to the whole family was understandable after his tough birth." Aemon's smile dimmed then settled, a joy filled his expression once again. "Although I wish it hadn't felt like such a long time, this year was filled with such loss."
"Yes I know, you be careful with him although Aegon is normally calm and well behaved he is still a baby." Whilst handing Aegon over to his brother Baelon continued "It was a long year indeed I wish it was not so, especially for the children." A surge of great sadness came over his features and he clenched his teeth.
Whilst getting checked in on by Aemon, Aegon was busy looking at the non Targaryens at the feast.
There was seemingly some Septon in attendance strange that they would invite one. Barely glancing at him Aegon moved on to another.
Some Grand Maester looking guy, then others who are probably on the small council advising the king on matters of governance high lords or lords of powerful families.
Lords of noble houses with such and such a name followed by their noble ancestors with all that noble blood of theirs. They as well as us Targaryens are all people in the end not too distant as they would believe from the average small folk probably only a few blood sacrifices between the Targaryen's and everyone else.
Once being passed around a bunch Aegon was seated with Baelon holding him through the feast, Aegon was sorrowful over not being able to eat any of the delicious looking foods but having reached his first name day he has his hopes set on the future whilst slurping away at his favourite puréed fantastique.
Slowly Aegon eyes began to droop, this once spotted by Baelon got him ready to leave whilst all the plates were being removed and conversations continued. Baelon and Alysanne with the help of Jaehaerys concluded the celebration whilst Baelon escorted Aegon to bed.
Following the death of another child Viserra before the years end, the 'First Quarrel' began between Jaehaerys and Alysanne. She left for Dragonstone whilst Jaehaerys had a already planned Royal Progress that he then prioritised for the next two years.
At the end of the First Quarrel King Jaehaerys being helped by his daughter Maegelle went to Dragonstone to reconcile with Queen Alysanne. Resulting in the return of Alysanne along with Gael who had stayed with her mother.
In the early moons of 88 AC Aegon attempted solid food once again.
After testing the strength of his stomach repeatedly Aegon was relieved to finally be able to eat solid foods. So he then dived into more substantial food he had been waiting a while for something to eat after all! The water put aside for him barely got touched at meals because he had more than enough liquids since he escaped from prison. Now was the time for food! I would have looked around to check for peoples reactions as normal to gauge the reactions to see if I had done something 'modern' again without noticing. Not feeling like it Aegon continued to eat, they could wait a day or two until I get it out of my system.
The Gluttony continued for a solid few days.
Although eventually I slowed down, can't act like a starved animal everyday of the week, they would end up changing my name to Maegor or something even worse like Pate Woodcock. All good things have to come to an end and after the third day of attacking breakfast I had, had enough of the wide eyed looks from my family, even the servants were not hiding their own looks!? Scandalous!! hahahahaha!
Aegon ( three years old at 89 AC )
Since 89 AC Aegon's first true goal began as 'taking better care of Gael's nutrition.' So upon Gael's return he set to work at his goal and set his plans in motion.
Aegon push's for better meals were not through the Maesters or cooks but the Queen who treasured Gael a great deal. Aegon mentioned how it helped heal his body after being weak in his younger years or so he was told by Vilda. At that point the introduction of food and regular exercise slipped through some times, the average cardio, resistance training and stretches not all of which was taken in to consideration. Through this Gael's body began healing at least a little bit from an unhealthy frailness to much better average or a happier medium of health. Food acting as the vital fuel for this process, thus having helped both Aegons as well as Gael's health.
Through this Aegon had grown closer to Alysanne of which he was very happy as he admired and respected her strength. The reason Aegon suspected it had been so easy for him to connect with Alysanne was her character which was a much more aprouchable one than Jaehaerys as well as Alysanne feeling more like a grandmother than a massive big deal Queen. Admired through out the next around two hundred years give or take having taverns named in her honour whilst having got rid of the nobility's right to the 'first night' which was a disgusting practice.
Aegon paused. He had just been thinking about the laws that were created and adjusted in Alysanne's rule with Jaehaerys. When the thought of the supposed main writer of those laws sprung to mind. How could I have forgotten about Septon Barth?!?!
Maybe instead of being taught anything by going to the untrustworthy Maesters now or to the Citadel when I'm older I could learn as much as possible from Barth, who wrote of some interesting things and he seemingly knew a lot about Dragons enough to speculate on their possible origins. This could sate my hunger for Dragon info as well as knowledge of Westeros upon other things that would be needed for my education.
Time to follow him around until he tells me to either 'fuck off' or 'follow me' I suppose.
"Upon my word I Aegon Targaryen swear to return these books to you." Aegon's face expressing deep sincerity made Septon Barth chuckle.
Septon Barth had never once seen such a child before coupled with the mature way Aegon acted even at four name day's old, this was a great opportunity Barth felt the need to no longer hold back with teaching him what he could.
"If you so wish it my Prince I can make time to teach you whilst not attending to my duties to the King." These words sparking a great glitter in Aegon's eyes left Barth smiling feeling he would not regret his decision to teach him.
So from Aegon's fourth name day in the year ninety after the conquest he began shadowing Septon Barth asking questions when he was available and asking to borrow some books then getting them copied for his own. This job boiled down to asking a kind enough servant Addam to help with the copying to help speed up the process. Of course Addam didn't know how to read much, let alone write but he kept me supplied with writing ink and parchment, even a replacement for my quill when one gets too worn down.
Addam had been assigned to my room a year ago and I've been working at shortening the massive distance between us socially ever since. Which has proven fruitful as he helps me out quite a bit instead of a woman's head maid Addam's my head chaperone ha! No of course not but I wouldn't mind calling him that, the relationship with him has been truly refreshing.
There is no stifling need to bow or scrape when alone from either of us, I'm glad of his company it has allowed some of my older tendencies to come alive once more. Trying to crack jokes, feeling down or a bit lost then I can give a huff without the need to keep a look out for the lady who so intensely guffawing about my improper behaviour. Baelon didn't particularly care when she said so but it was absolutely criminal stuff I'll have a hard time forgetting that day.
How was I supposed to know not to do it? Oh yeah my years of etiquette lessons probably.
Well, alls well that ends well.