54. "SAME DESIRE" [E]
I'm about to explode, this fucking love is starting to take over me, I'm starting to trip, can't even distract myself from this bullshit.. I'm tryna be with somebody I'm not supposed to desire but my body misses her body and the love we used to make for hours.
I could pull up on her, stumble into the yard, knock on the door and do what it takes.. I'm thinking that's a good idea because this feeling is starting to feel like a suicide drug, it's killing me and at the same time, it's driving me out of my mind.
It doesn't matter if she's been giving me hell, I miss her, I wanna kiss her and make love to her the same way I used to. If she doesn't rescue me from this trap, I don't know what will become of me.
I'm about to explode, this fucking love is starting to take over me, can we make love?
55. "NO TIME SOON" / "LIKE HER"
It's been ten months since the breakup, and it's been about four months ever since I last kissed her, I still think about her, I still fight myself to not think about her, I still wake up missing her and I still try to deal with the void that she left me with.
I realize that there's no timeline when it comes to love and heartbreaks, I really thought that my heart would simply let go and move along with my mind, body and soul but I was so wrong 'cause here I am ten months later, still trying to segregate myself from the past.
A lot has happened in the last 10 months, so many wrongs, faults and mishaps, I've done a lot trying to kill this feeling and live my life without the past lingering over me. Sometimes I feel like I'm the only reason why this shit is happening to me because we were both in love but it seems like I'm the only fucked up by the end of that relationship, or maybe I was just too invested.
This could go on for another year or years, there's just no timeline when it comes to love and heartbreaks.
//"LIKE HER" //
Maybe if I find her in somebody else, that would bring me some sense of healing, somebody that has a forehead and a pretty face, a girl with thick thighs and a beautiful ass like her. A girl that loves to cook and stay at home like her, a girl that talks and treats herself just like her, I want somebody exactly like her because I'm still hung up on her.