Mei POV
Once I got to my room, I sat at my desk and continued eating my dinner while texting Hoshino.
Throughout the conversation, my eyes would drift back to the door, reminding me of the guilt lingering in the back of my mind. Still, without fail, my phone would buzz the very next moment, and I'd respond right away.
We weren't talking about anything serious—just what our favourite foods were, since it turned out we were both eating dinner.
I knew he was into Asian cuisine—since it was all he ever ate—but I still found myself surprised by his answer. Apparently, his favourite food was a Vietnamese dish called broken rice.
I looked it up, and it was just this rice dish filled to the brim with meats topped with vegetables, fried egg, and fish sauce. I'd never heard of it before, and honestly, I don't really care about it. But since Hoshino kept insisting that it was good, I couldn't help but get a little interested as well.
Even though I knew that I wouldn't be able to taste it if I tried it, I still wanted to give it a shot at least.
Maybe, if it's him recommending it, things could turn out differently.
My phone buzzed before I could even begin typing my response. Hoshino had just sent a double text.
Before I realized it, a smile had tugged at the corner of my lips.
I brought my phone close to my lips, as if trying to hide it from the world.
This… is the first time something like this has happened.
Normally, whenever we texted, we sent one message at a time and waited for the other to respond. That was how it usually went—at least with people you weren't close to.
A strange, fuzzy feeling pricked at my cheek. Curious, I lifted my hand and brushed two fingers across it.
…Warm.
I didn't know what the warmth was, but it felt… nice. I wanted to sit in it for just a little longer, but my phone buzzed again, killing the warmth.
I pulled my phone away from my lips and read his latest text.
I stared at the message blankly. I could hear the sarcasm right through the words on my screen.
There was some context I was missing, so I scrolled up to the message before that one—the one I hadn't read yet.
It said,
His spelling was horrid, but it was fairly easy for me to work out what he was trying to say.
I couldn't help but giggle as I typed my response.
His reply came instantly.
My eyes narrowed as I brought my phone closer. This was the thing with his spelling. Sometimes, they were fairly easy to work out. Other times—like this one—it was so atrocious that I couldn't possibly imagine how he even typed this out.
After two minutes of continuous staring, I finally managed to figure out what he was trying to say. 'Stop lying.'
My thumbs blurred across the screen.
Then I sent a second message right after, a double text of my own.
By this point, I'd finished eating dinner, so I didn't have anything to do but wait for his reply.
It never came. He didn't even read it. It was a little strange—considering he had been active only a couple of seconds ago—and usually whenever he left to do something, he'd let me know.
Still, sometimes things came up, so I didn't dwell on it for too long. Instead, set my empty plate aside, pulled out my laptop, a notebook, textbooks, and pencils, and began to study.
Silence filled my room, the only sound being my pencil scratching against the page. I kept at it for what felt like forever.
Studying usually came easy for me; I'd zone out and mindlessly read and write. This time, my gaze kept pulling away from my notebook and back to my phone, still sitting at the corner of my desk.
I glanced at the time. It was 9:24. Only five minutes had passed since I started studying.
My pencil seemed to grow heavier in my hand.
…This isn't working.
At this rate, I wasn't going to make any progress. I reached for my phone, grabbed it, and opened the drawer beside my desk. My hand froze mid-air just as I was about to set it inside.
I tried to push it in, but my hand wouldn't budge, like an invisible wall ringed the drawer, forbidding entry.
I took a deep breath, then let it out slowly.
Don't be stupid. If you hear it buzz, you can reply. Until then, we will continue studying.
With that vow in mind, the resistance around the drawer vanished. I placed my phone in the drawer, then pushed it shut with a soft *thump*.
Now that my phone was out of my sight, I studied seamlessly. Eventually, I slipped into the state where I'd zone out and mindlessly solved the questions in front of me.
The sound of pages flipping along with lead scratching against the paper filled my room, but fell flat in my ears. I continuously glanced between my notebook and my laptop screen, but I couldn't actually see anything.
In this blurry, empty world—only the small three digits at the bottom right corner of the screen, displaying the time, were clear.
*scritch* *scritch*
Why… hasn't he responded yet?
*scritch* *scritch* *scritch*
It's been almost twenty minutes, but my phone hasn't buzzed a single time.
*flip*
No, there's no point thinking about this. I'm sure he's just busy.
My hand started to tingle, as if I'd been pressing too hard, but I could barely notice the sensation as I drowned in my own thoughts.
But… what if I'm not overthinking?
*SCRITCH*
What if… he's tired of me?
My whole body tensed. It was as if cold strings stitched into my flesh, holding me in place, each strand a piercing chill.
No… please let me be wrong…
*SCRITCH* *SCRITCH* *SCRITCH*
Please don't leave me, Hoshino…
*SNAP*
The unusually loud snap of my lead pulled me out of my thoughts. The once-blurred, empty world cleared with a single blink.
Then—I looked down at the page. I didn't react or have any thoughts about what I saw. I just stared.
I was supposed to be studying math, but there wasn't a single formula in sight. Not even a number. Instead, from top to bottom, my page was filled with dark, frantic lines that read:
"Don't leave me."
"I miss you."
"I want to see you."
"Where did you go?"
"Why aren't you responding to me?"
"Are you tired of me?"
"Please respond to me."
By the time I reached the end of the page, my pencil had already fallen from my hands without me realizing.
I let out a thin breath as I pushed myself off my chair and looked to the drawer where my phone sat.
My finger twitched—then my hand shot forward and wrenched the drawer open, my desk rattling from the force of it.
I grabbed my phone and opened my messages with Hoshino.
I leaned against the wall, supporting the weight of my body as I read through our messages over and over again. My thumb dragged across the screen as I scrolled through the messages, and my eyes strained as I studied each line we'd sent.
Did I say something wrong?
Was there something his texts meant that I missed?
I scrolled higher and higher, even going as far as to our messages from the day before.
There's nothing.
He didn't allude to anything.
I didn't say anything.
…So why?
I gripped my phone tighter.
Why… isn't he responding to me?
That was when an idea came to me. What if the answer had been simple all along? What if… he just forgot. Hoshino was human. He could make mistakes too. He could forget, too.
So... it's okay if I send him a triple text, right?
He sent me a double text first, so it was only fair. He started it.
My thumbs slowly moved across the screen, typing each word with care. The text wasn't anything funny, sarcastic, or playful. Just a plain,
As I was about to hit send, my thumb froze.
What if… he still doesn't respond?
What if he's read all of my messages and chose to do this?
Just thinking about it made my left wrist throb—the same one from earlier.
The pain cleared my mind for a split second.
I took my gaze off my phone and directed it to the top corner of my desk—to a small storage box where I kept things that made my room feel more like a girl's. There were plushies, a small cactus, and a picture of Mom and me from when we were kids.
But... hidden in the very depths of the storage box behind everything else, where the shadows gathered, something glinted. The instant the light hit my eyes, my body relaxed.
It's okay... everything will be okay...
My thumb moved on its own and hit the send button. I looked back at my screen. Still no reply, and no sign he'd read it. But I waited. I waited and waited and waited. Then, my message finally turned to 'read.'
A small sense of warmth flushed my chest the moment I saw it. I stared straight at the word. I wasn't seeing things. It wasn't a lie. It was actually there. He had actually read my message.
Thank goodness…
Shortly after, my phone buzzed, and his reply came. The moment I read it, everything stopped.
…What?
His reply was perfectly normal. It read,
It was a reasonable excuse. Hoshino actually enjoyed the food he ate, so it was no wonder that he could forget things as he did. The problem wasn't the reason, however.
In his text… there wasn't a single thing misspelled.
It shouldn't have been a big deal. It was just a text. Maybe he felt like it. Or maybe it was sheer, dumb luck. Still, something about it made my skin crawl.
Something's… wrong.
I could mull it over all day, but it wouldn't have amounted to anything. It would have been nothing more than a guess.
…But that didn't mean there was nothing I could do.
The muscles in my cheeks pulled taut, and a smile crept up my lips.
This is perfect timing. I wanted to see you, anyway.
My thumbs sped across the screen as I typed out my reply. No formality. No setup. Just straight to the point.
There was a short pause—only a second—before his reply came.
I reacted to his message with a simple thumbs up, then ran out of my room. I was still in my uniform, and maybe he would find it weird for me to still be in it this late, but I didn't care.
Mom, who was still at the dinner table, gave me a surprised look as I ran down the stairs.
She didn't ask anything—she just gave me a soft smile and a nod.
Even though I didn't have to, I called back anyway.
"Thanks, Mom. I'll be back soon!"
Mom let out a short breath as she got up from her seat.
"Take care, Mei. Oh, and by the way–"
As I finished pulling on my shoes and swung the door open, she called out to me from behind.
"You don't have to lock the door! Just go—I'll do it for you!"
I gave her one last thanks in the form of a nod, then ran to the car.
I jammed in the key, started the engine, and drove off to our secret place.