The clock had struck 3 a.m. Now, June sat in the kitchen, head laid on the counter, her phone open to Ryan's last message. She stared into the stillness, wondering if Ryan felt the same… if he was thinking about that day too.
Her mind drifted, to the time after she hugged Ryan. She had been avoiding him for days and was now hiding in the library. the quiet hum of the air conditioning, the sunlight slanting through the tall windows.
Ryan appeared behind her chair and leaned in over her without warning. June froze still, her heart thumping so loud.
"Blue," he said softly. "I knew you would be here."
She pulled out the chair next to her and sat next to her.
June got up, ready to slip away.
Ryan quickly grabbed the edge of the sleeve of her sweater gently as she tried to get away. "I'm tired of chasing you around June.... Spill it... what did I do this time?"
June swallowed, avoiding eye contact with him. "nothing...i ...just..."
"No," he interrupted, "We're not doing this cat and mouse forever. Either we talk, or I'm spending my time chasing you instead of studying... Then I might fail my exams...and you don't want that, right?"
Reluctantly, June sat back down, opposite him, keeping her distance. She opened her book, pretending to study, though her mind was elsewhere.
Ryan stayed calm, unbothered, picking up a few books from the shelf, flipping through them without looking her way. June couldn't help sneaking glances, her eyes darting to him again and again. She hadn't realized how obvious it was until their eyes met. The corners of his lips lifted slightly and his eyes glimmered, like he knew exactly what she was thinking.
An hour later, he leaned forward, hand supporting his cheek, eyes shut, pretending to nap. Thinking he was asleep, June quietly rose, careful not to make a sound. She almost reached the library doors when a firm hand closed over hers.
"We're talking... Now!" Ryan said, voice serious. "You wouldn't want me following you around."
June hesitated, but she couldn't out run him this time. Ryan had determination written all over his face as he left her to a quiet place with less students.
He finally asked, his serious eyes now softening. "June, what did I do this time?"
"I… I don't know," she whispered, her head hanging low.
"Ever since the exams, you've been dodging me. Is it because I didn't hug you back? Okay. I'll hug you back now." He said opening his arms wide.
"No," she said, shaking her head.
"God...what did I do?" he asked, patient yet insistent.
June bit her lip. Silence hung between them. It was complicated, impossible to untangle in words.
Ryan took a step closer to her. She didn't move back but kept her head down. Ryan then leaned in. "Blue, do you hate still hate..."
June panicked and looked up. Their eyes met. "I...I don't hate you!!" She yelled. Then softer than a whisper. "I hate you a little bit less."
Ryan's eyes softened as he reached for her hand and pulled her so close she could feel his breath. He then gently tilted her head up to his.
"if You hate me less... Why do you keep running from me?" he asked as he gently tucked her braids behind her ears revealing her flushed face. "Blue...do you like me?"
"I… yes, I guess," she admitted quietly.
She froze, she had said it...heart was threatening to break her ribcage but she somehow felt relief.
Ryan's smile widened. "Let's try this again," he said, playful but sincere. "Dating...What do you say?"
"Wait...!" June gasped, eyes wide. Stepping back.
"Yeah… I'm curious too," he said softly stepping closer.
June stayed quiet, still trying to process. And Ryan was growing impatient.
"I can't be the only one talking here. June… please say something. Yes or no?"
She hesitated, lips parting but no words forming. "I don't know… maybe no… maybe yes…"
"I'll take the latter," he said with a grin.
For the first time in what felt like forever, June exhaled. Today, she thought silently, today marks the start. Today, they were a couple.
A sudden ping from her phone broke her from the memory. She blinked, back in her kitchen. A new message lit up the screen.
Keighley ; June, I'm at your door. Please open up.
She gasped. Kayleigh was actually here… that late. She hadn't lied. She was here.
Without hesitation, June opened the door. Keighley jumped in and hugged her tightly. All the emotions June had held in...the anxiety, the longing, that memory... finally gave way. Keighley gently parted from her back, and they wept quietly together.
Dear Diary,
Memories of him
I still can't forget,
The shimmering look in his eyes,
The soft grip of his hands,
His soft but loud heartbeat.
But am afraid,
Does he remember me the same way?
~June