Chapter 55
"Found it!"
Gwenpool dug her phone out from the pile of comics and bounced excitedly over to Yang Jian.
"Come on, Superman! Let's take a selfie!"
She hooked her arm around his, striking an exaggerated duck-face pose.
Yang Jian cooperated with a smile. The moment the flash went off, Gwenpool deliberately stood on tiptoes pretending to kiss him.
"Perfect!"
She quickly added a caption to the photo: [Date photo with Superman!]
Then she mysteriously hid her phone.
"This photo is worth money. If my comic sales ever tank, I'm auctioning it off!"
After putting the phone away, Gwenpool suddenly became serious. She clasped her hands together and looked at Yang Jian with big pleading eyes.
"So how do we make the serum? I can help! Even though I wouldn't know how to hold a test tube."
Yang Jian raised an eyebrow at her: "I can give you superpowers—but what can you bring me in return?"
Gwenpool's eyes darted around. She suddenly leaned in close, putting on a pitiful expression, long lashes fluttering.
"Then can I be your girlfriend? I'm super good at cheering people up!"
"That alone isn't enough."
Yang Jian shook his head with a smile. "I already have several girlfriends."
"Eh?!"
Gwenpool immediately returned to normal and propped her chin on her hand in thought.
"Then how about I take you along whenever there's something fun?"
She blinked playfully.
"Please please please—if you don't give me superpowers soon, my solo comic is gonna get canceled! I don't want to disappear from the Marvel world!"
Yang Jian pretended to think for a moment: "Fine. Deal."
"Yay!"
Gwenpool launched herself at him in a flying hug, planted a loud kiss on his cheek, then nimbly jumped down.
"From today onward, you belong to Gwenpool, Superman!"
Yang Jian smiled and retrieved a vial glowing with blue fluorescence from his system space. Gwenpool instantly froze, eyes round as saucers: "This… this is the…"
She swallowed hard, fingers trembling slightly.
"Superhuman serum." Yang Jian handed it to her.
"It'll give you dozens of times Captain America's physical stats."
Gwenpool snatched it and—without another word—jammed the needle into her arm.
Yang Jian tried to warn her: "Wait—it's going to hurt a bit."
Aaaahhhhhhh!!!!!
Gwenpool collapsed instantly, curling into a shrimp-like ball and rolling wildly on the floor.
"Aaaah! Why didn't you say sooner?! It feels like ten thousand ants are gnawing my bones! I'm dying I'm dying!"
Two minutes later, Gwenpool suddenly went still. She stared at her hands in disbelief.
"This… this is superhuman strength?"
She lightly clenched her fist—the air actually produced a sonic boom.
"Too! Awesome!"
She suddenly spun toward an invisible camera (breaking the fourth wall) and shouted excitedly:
"Did you readers see that?! Gwenpool just got superpowers today! Please keep subscribing to my comic! I swear I'll be a proper superhero from now on!"
To prove it, she punched the wall.
BOOM!
The entire wall collapsed, revealing the bathroom next door.
Gwenpool stared dumbfounded at her handiwork, then erupted into even louder cheers.
"I'm actually strong now! Yay!"
She launched herself at Yang Jian again, clinging to him like a koala and planting several loud kisses on his face.
"Thank you thank you! I'm gonna go punch Thanos for you right now!"
Yang Jian helplessly caught the overexcited newly-powered girl.
"I suggest starting with street-level thugs first!"
"No problem!" Gwenpool jumped down and struck a classic superhero landing pose.
"From today onward—I am Super Gwen!"
She suddenly thought of something and leaned in close, whispering:
"Um… is there any serum left? I want to give one to other-universe versions of me too."
"No."
"Okay." Gwenpool rallied instantly.
Yang Jian looked at her with interest: "Besides opening comic panels, can you return to the real universe?"
Gwenpool's expression instantly dimmed. She lowered her head and fidgeted with her clothes: "I've tried so many times… I can never get back."
Her voice carried rare melancholy: "In the end, Doctor Strange helped me get an ID so I could live in this world as a third-rate superhero—even though I can't even beat most villains."
Yang Jian gently patted her shoulder: "Want to try again? Maybe this time it'll work."
Gwenpool looked up, suddenly curious as she studied Yang Jian: "By the way—how did you come to the Marvel universe?"
"Got hit by a truck." Yang Jian shrugged.
"Hah?"
Gwenpool looked completely baffled: "That actually works?"
She suddenly burst out laughing, then cleared her throat and pretended to be serious.
"Okay then—let's try."
She reached into the air and tore open a comic panel.
Gwenpool winked at Yang Jian and nimbly slipped inside.
Yang Jian walked up to the floating comic frame and touched the edge.
The sensation was as solid as a wall.
He tried floating up to pass through the frame—but was blocked by an invisible barrier.
"Come on!"
Gwenpool poked her head out from the panel and reached for Yang Jian's hand.
"It's super fun on this side!"
"I can't get in." Yang Jian frowned.
"Stop joking!" Gwenpool tugged his hand hard.
"Push harder!"
They tried every angle and position, but Yang Jian remained blocked outside the panel.
"Wait a second."
Yang Jian closed his eyes and began mobilizing the most broken ability of Silver Age Superman: I reckon power.
First attempt: [I can pass through this panel]
Failure.
Second attempt: [I can definitely get through!]
The invisible barrier seemed to thin slightly.
Third attempt—Yang Jian's whole body glowed faintly gold: [This wall doesn't even exist!]
Crack!
With a crisp sound, the blocking barrier shattered like glass.
Yang Jian easily floated up and passed through the comic panel frame in an instant.
"Whoa!"
Gwenpool stared dumbfounded at Yang Jian suddenly appearing beside her: "How did you just… wait!"
She reacted instantly: "You used I reckon just now, didn't you?! That most broken Superman power!"
Yang Jian smiled without answering and looked around.
They were in a pure white space. Countless comic panels floated like doorways, each showing scenes from different universes.
"Welcome inside the fourth wall!" Gwenpool spun excitedly in a circle.
"This is my secret base!" She suddenly pointed at a particularly large panel in the distance.
"Look! That's the entrance back to the real universe!"
Yang Jian followed her finger. Sure enough, there was a special panel with golden edges.
Inside it showed the familiar real-world scene.
"Can we really go back?" Gwenpool's voice suddenly became nervous; her fingers unconsciously twisted together.
Yang Jian took her hand: "Only one way to find out."
The two flew toward that special panel. This time—perhaps they could finally find the way home.
If you're enjoying the translation, your support on Patreon really helps me keep going stronger and faster. Thank you! ❤️
patreon.com/arthursink