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Chapter 34: The Mastermind Behind the Turmoil
After listening to Arlong's so-called "Fish-Man life," I made a few arrangements with him... Leaving him behind in his Level 3 cage, I set off toward Level 4 alongside Densuke the Transponder Snail.
"Hmm, well, everyone has their own history, I guess. What did you think of Arlong's story, Densuke?"
"Jiii~~."
"I was honestly shocked. To think Hachi used to be part of the pirate crew that ruled over Nami's hometown."
Sitting atop Densuke's back—her shell—I dangled my legs and muttered mostly to myself.
"I don't know Nami all that well, but from the vibe back then, it seemed like she'd already forgiven Hachi... That's amazing. If I were in her shoes, I definitely wouldn't be able to forgive him."
"Jiii, jiii."
If I were in Nami's position... If I were the one whose hometown was conquered and whose precious loved ones were murdered... I absolutely, 100% would never forgive the culprit.
Just like Arlong when Fisher Tiger was killed, I'd probably turn into a demon hellbent on revenge.
"...Hey, Densuke."
"Jii?"
"In my homeland of Dressrosa, there's a guy named Doflamingo who's apparently become the new king..."
"Niii~~."
"Dressrosa is... going to be okay, right? Doflamingo is a proper, good king, right? The country isn't being tyrannically ruled or anything, right? None of my precious people have been... killed, right...?"
"Ji... jiiii."
"Ahem! Sorry! That was out of character for me to whine like that! It's fine! I'm sure it's fine! It's definitely fine! Fuhehehehe~!"
"..."
Taking our time at a slow, leisurely pace, we eventually found the stairs leading down to Level 4 and smoothly slithered our way forward.
—————
"Phew, we finally made it out of that boiling hot Level 3... Or so I thought..."
Waiting for us past the boiling hot floor was an even more boiling hot floor. The further down the stairs we went, the higher the temperature climbed. Calling it "hot" was an understatement; it was blistering.
"Guh... Come to think of it, Buggy mentioned that Level 4 was the 'Blazing Hell'... Which means it's even hotter than Level 3..."
"Hah... hah... hah..."
I glanced down to see that even Densuke was sweating profusely and panting heavily. Hmm, she looks like she's struggling. Even if she only came along because I threatened her, she sure stuck with me for a long time. ...It's probably about time I let her go.
"Densuke, it's fine now. Thanks for carrying me this far."
"Jii...?"
Densuke tilted her head blankly.
"I'm saying you don't have to carry me any further. You should head back up to the higher levels, Densuke."
"Jiji...!?"
"It's too tough for you to go any further, right? I'll go on alone from here."
"..."
Saying that, I hopped off her back and reached out to pat her head...
Chomp!
"Oww!?"
She bit my hand.
"What was that for!?"
"Nii niii~! Niii~!!"
Densuke vehemently shook her head from side to side.
"??"
"Niii~~! Ji! Ji! Ji!"
Using her incredibly short little arms, Densuke began throwing quick jabs, shadowboxing with swish, swish sounds. Was she trying to show off that she still had plenty of energy left?
...Wait. Then that means...
"...Don't tell me, you actually want to keep sticking with me?"
"Nin ♪"
Densuke flashed a wide, goofy grin.
"D-Densuke! You're... such a good girl!! Thank you!!"
"Nyyyyaa~~!"
I went full animal-lover mode, aggressively rubbing and petting her with all my might while chanting, "Good girl, good girl!" Densuke squirmed happily, clearly tickled by the attention.
"Alright! I'm counting on you from here on out, Densuke!"
"Niii ♪"
Fooling around like that, we finally arrived at Level 4! The Blazing Hell. It was a floor that resembled a massive iron cauldron. A boiling Blood Pond Hell, a roaring sea of fire. My mental image of hell looked pretty much exactly like this.
"O-Ooh... I-It's so hoooot...!! What is this place... just standing here is enough to kill me... Are you really okay, Densuke...?"
"Jiii~~..."
I've mentioned it before, but I can't stand the heat. Though honestly, finding someone who actually enjoys it would be rare. I felt like stripping naked and shaving off all the fur on my tail right this second.
"Phew, hah, hah... If there was a sweaty beauty in a swimsuit nearby, I could easily endure this level of heat... But there's no way a beauty like that would be down here at the bottom of hell... Hah, hah..."
Just as the extreme heat made me blurt out something so incredibly stupid...
"Mmm~~ ♡ That okama! He probably took these stairs up to Level 3... huh?"
"Huh?"
Right before our eyes, a sweaty, blonde beauty in a bondage outfit appeared. To put it simply, an S&M club dominatrix. It was a little different from what I requested, but the sudden appearance of a lady in a sexy outfit made me forget the heat, and my excitement shot through the roof! My tail sprang straight up and—wait, no, no! That's not right!
Crap!! We managed to make it all the way from Level 1 to Level 4 without anyone spotting us...! But we finally got caught!
The heat had completely lowered my guard.
"Mmm~ ♡ W-What!? A dwarf!? Why is there a dwarf in a place like this...!? Wait a minute! You! I've seen that face before! Mmm~ ♡"
The S&M dominatrix sharply readied her whip.
"The 1-billion-Berry bounty! The Invisible Phantom Thief! Mmm~~ ♡ You've been the talk of the town lately. When exactly did you infiltrate!?"
Crack!!
"Whoops."
"Jiii!?"
The dominatrix accurately snapped her whip right at the bridge of my nose. However, perceiving it with my Observation Haki, I casually dodged the strike.
"You dodged it!? Mmm~~ ♡ Cheeky!!"
"Fuhehe, sorry, but I'm not a masochist! If it was a boob-slap instead of a whip, I might've taken it."
"Mmm~~ ♡ Attention all Impel Down sectors! This is Chief Guard Sadie! We have an intruder on Level 4! Hurry and call Warden Magellan! The intruder is the Invisible Phantom Thief!!"
The woman named Sadie immediately called for backup using a walkie-talkie-like Transponder Snail. Obviously, I had no obligation to sit around quietly and wait for reinforcements to arrive.
"Sorry, Sadie-chan, but I'll be making my escape! Let's go, Densuke!"
"Jiii!"
Hoisting Densuke up effortlessly, I leaped right over Sadie and dashed straight down the single bridge spanning the fiery chasm.
"Fuhehe! You carried me all the way here, Densuke. Now it's my turn to carry you!"
"Ni, ni, ni!"
"Wait right there! Mmm~~ ♡ Minotaurus! Minokoala! Capture that little pipsqueak!!"
At Sadie's command, two massive figures charged toward us from the other end of the bridge. They were four or five meters tall... a pudgy cow and a pudgy koala running on two legs.
What the heck are those!? I kind of understand the Minotaurus part, but what in the world is a Minokoala!? According to my Observation Haki, they looked goofy, but they were incredibly strong.
"...Well, they're still no match for me! Tontatta Combat: Jaw Tail!!"
Smack!!
"Bumoooo...!?"
"Ooooouh...!?"
A precise tail chop aimed squarely at their jaws. It was a move I used frequently because it was perfect for clearing out small fry, but...
"Bumo!"
"Ooooh!"
"Huh... you actually endured that. You're tougher than you look."
Both Minotaurus and Minokoala merely stumbled slightly before immediately recovering and charging at me again.
"In that case... Tail Hammer!!"
SMASH!! SMASH!!
"...!!"
A heavy tail strike straight to the crown of their heads. It was a blow capable of shattering massive boulders. Taking it head-on, the koala and the cow slumped forward and collapsed heavily onto the ground.
"Fuhehe! Well, that's about right."
"Jiii!"
Densuke clapped her little hands in applause. I was just about to step over the two unconscious beasts and continue forward when...
"Bumoooooh!!"
"Ooooooh!!"
"Ji!?"
"Whoa!? They got back up!?"
I was absolutely certain I had knocked them out cold. Their recovery speed was insane!
"Mmm~ ♡ These good boys are Awakened Zoan Devil Fruit users! No matter how much you hurt them, they'll recover right away... Mmm~ ♡ They're the Jailer Beasts of Hell!"
Sadie explained, licking her whip seductively. Hot. ...Wait, no! These guys are Devil Fruit users!?
What's an Awakening? Is this what happens when a Zoan user Awakens? Does that mean... if my little sister figure, Esune, who has a Rabbit Devil Fruit, Awakens her powers, she'll turn out like this...?
» Biiiig Brotheeerrrr! « Rumble, rumble...
Ugh! I just imagined something terrible! I aggressively shook my head to banish the horrifying hallucination.
"Now, surrender! Invisible Phantom Thief!"
"Bumoooo!!"
"Ooooooh!!"
"Whoa!? Ha! Hup! Heya!"
Minotaurus and Minokoala swung their massive clubs at me from the front. Meanwhile, Sadie launched long-range whip strikes from behind.
Thanks to my Observation Haki, none of the attacks landed, but the sheer volume of strikes was getting overwhelming.
"Gah!! You're so annoying!!"
"Kya!?"
Moving faster than the eye could track, I snatched Sadie's incoming whip right out of the air. Then, I violently snapped it in half.
"My whip!?"
"Fuhehe, now you can't attack me anymore!"
"The worst!! Mmm~~ ♡ Life has no meaning if I'm not the one doing the attacking!!"
"Then I'll take over the attacking for you!"
"Eh!?"
"Take this!!"
Snap!
"Aaahhn!? ♡"
Using the torn-off, now dwarf-sized segment of the whip, I ruthlessly spanked Sadie on her backside.
"Tontatta Combat: Love Whip!"
"S-Such humiliation!! Mmm~~ ♡ To think that I would be the one getting whipped!"
"Here! Here! Take this! And this!"
"Ahn ♡ Yaan ♡ Stop it ♡ Aaahn ♡"
Not too painful! But just painful enough! Make it as erotic as possible! I swung the whip with absolute precision!
"Bumoooo!!"
"Ooooooh!!"
"I won't go easy on you two!! Tontatta Combat: Twin Dragon Strike!!"
CRACK!!
"...!!"
I struck Minotaurus and Minokoala with every ounce of strength I had. Next was Sadie. I relentlessly spanked her backside. As erotic as possible! As erotic as possible!
"Jii! Jiiii!"
"What? This is no time to be playing around? Man, fine..."
Thwack.
"Ahn... ♡"
Densuke was nagging me, so I reluctantly finished Sadie off. I didn't use the whip, instead opting for a quick Jaw Tail that knocked her out cold.
"Alright, next up is you, the cow and the koala! Time to finish this!!"
"B-Bumoooo!!"
"Ooooooh!!"
Enraged by Sadie's defeat, the two beasts charged at me with blinding speed. Minotaurus swung his spiked club, while Minokoala wound up a punch with his brass knuckles.
I was still fighting while carrying Densuke on my back, after all. Taking even a single hit would be disastrous, so I needed to deliver a full-power strike before their attacks could reach us.
"Tontatta Combat: Tail Impact!!"
KABOOOOOOM!!!
"...!!"
It was my highest firepower attack at the moment. A devastating tail strike clad in Armament Haki. Even the Awakened Zoans couldn't endure that level of force. The two pudgy beasts crashed to the floor, completely unconscious.
"Phew... that took longer than expected. Mostly because of Sadie-chan..."
"Jiii..."
Carrying Densuke, who looked like she had something to say, I dashed briskly across the bridge. Now, where were the stairs to Level 5...? Just as I was looking around...
THUD.
"Whoa!"
"Ji!?"
"Other than Straw Hat, to think a rat of this caliber had slipped in...!!"
Landing right in front of us was a man in a jet-black military uniform, towering at least five meters tall.
"Jiii!! Ninini! Jiii! Jiii! Jijijiii~~!!"
"W-What's wrong, Densuke? What are you making such a fuss abou—uh!?"
Densuke suddenly started panicking. The reason why... went without saying. My Observation Haki instantly provided the answer. This man was unbelievably strong!!
His strength was on a completely different dimension compared to the Minotaurus and Minokoala I'd just defeated.
"Don't tell me... you're Magellan?"
"Indeed. The man with a 1-billion-Berry bounty, the Invisible Phantom Thief..."
When Buggy was feeding me intel about Impel Down, I'd actually heard a bit about the boss of this place, the Warden. Warden Magellan. A Poison Human who ate the Venom-Venom Fruit, and apparently a total piece of shit who constantly had diarrhea...
"..."
Magellan glared sharply at me and then began to slowly rub his stomach.
"To think I'd be dragged into another battle when I was right in the middle of a terrible bout of diarrhea from overusing my poison against Straw Hat... good grief..."
So he really did have diarrhea... Wait, hold on! Did he just say his battle with Straw Hat!?
"Y-You fought Luffy? Don't tell me... did he already get captured...?"
"Captured? No. 'Straw Hat' Luffy... was executed by my own hand."
"...Huh?"
Executed?
"It was a punishment of poison. If it had been just a single type, there might have been a path to a cure... but I pumped Straw Hat full of dozens of lethal poisons. There is no antidote. He will die shortly."
"Die...!? Eh!? Luffy is... going to die...!? That can't be... no way..."
We're inside a prison. I thought that even if he got caught by the guards, fought them, and lost, they would just toss him in a cell. I thought they wouldn't take his life... But execution!?
"...!!"
I-I was too naive... What the hell was I thinking, being so hopelessly naive...?
That's right. The possibility of him being killed was always there. Just because Luffy was so exceptionally strong, I completely discarded that possibility and left him to his own devices. This is my fault...!!
"D-Damn it! Damn it all!! How dare you do that to Luffy!! How dare you...!!"
"...The only mystery was exactly how Straw Hat managed to infiltrate this supposedly impenetrable iron fortress. ...But now I see... Invisible Phantom Thief! It was your doing!"
"Hah!?"
"With your tiny stature, infiltrating Impel Down undetected... would not be impossible. Once inside, you guided Straw Hat in from within! Am I wrong!?"
...Guided?
"Exactly! 'Straw Hat' Luffy is the first intruder in Impel Down's history! But the true mastermind pulling the strings from the shadows! The real culprit behind this entire turmoil! That would be you! Invisible Phantom Thief!!"
"..."
"Hmph. Hit the nail on the head, did I?"
Uh, no... I just tagged along for the ride because Hancock said she was sneaking Luffy into Impel Down... You couldn't be more off the mark.
...But I couldn't exactly say that out loud without ruining Hancock's position...
Hmm. Oh well. Guess I'll just play the role of the mastermind here.
"...F-Fuhehehehe! You're too late! Everything is dancing in the palm of my hand! How does it feel!? Being completely played for a fool? Fu~hehehehe!"
"Curse you...!! I will capture you and put an end to this turmoil! Hydra!"
"Whoa!?"
A massive, three-headed dragon made entirely of venomous liquid slithered right out of Magellan's body. Poison Tera Type! Hydreigon!!
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