"Third Hokage, I already said, this is the package that your Swain wanted. Why won't you sign for it?"
"Mine too, why won't you sign for it?"
Third Hokage Hiruzen Sarutobi had a headache. "If I sign for it, where am I supposed to put it?! I can't even get into his broken place!"
Damn it, there were only three people who could freely enter and exit the sacred place, and you took them all away! Couldn't you have left a key? I'm supposed to steal or rob something that's guarded by three tailed beasts?
Terumi Mei and Onoki personally delivered the goods. Ordinary people really wouldn't get this treatment. But then again, what else could they do but deliver the goods personally?
Kirigakure only has one person who can control the Three Tails after the massacre.
Iwagakure Village has a talent shortage. Besides Onoki, no one can keep an eye on Roshi.
"That bastard Swain is just looking for trouble for the village."
A Six Eyes crow next to the Hokage's office spoke. "I heard that. Didn't I leave you a key? Just go in yourself. I'm afraid you'll steal something with three tailed beasts guarding the place?"
The Third Hokage was shocked. How did he know what I was thinking? Can he read minds now? Wait, where's the key?
"Isn't this the key? What did I leave the crow for? Just for you to play with and relieve boredom?"
The Third Hokage was furious. I don't have dementia! "Konoha has a crow for almost every person, and you're telling me the crow is the key?!"
"Well, what else? I've never stopped anyone from visiting the sacred place."
The Third Hokage rubbed his old back and said fiercely, "If I were twenty years younger, I'd slap you to death."
Onoki said mercilessly, "Give it up. You're a hero, he's a devil. Don't mess with things that aren't human."
That's just how it is. What's the point of being twenty years younger? He could exhaust you to death before, and now he can kill you instantly.
The Third Hokage asked again, "Swain, when are you coming back to the village?"
Swain said in a way that begged for a beating, "I'm already in the village. Two foreign Kage-level people came, so I have to ensure the village's safety."
Terumi Mei was fine, but Onoki was instantly angry. "Didn't you freaking ask us to come?!"
As a result, he moved too much and said, "Ouch, my old back..."
Meanwhile, somewhere in Konoha, a old man selling cheats was sitting at Ichiraku Ramen, looking at a man who felt very familiar, and eating another bowl of tonkotsu ramen.
"Another bowl of seafood. To go."
"Alright, sir, you have a great appetite."
Ichiraku Uncle smiled, very kindly, and the official cheat felt even more familiar.
Have I met him somewhere before?
Hagoromo smiled like an old father. "Not bad, my second son is just like me. He probably eats a lot."
Ichiraku Uncle also felt inexplicably close to the man in front of him. "Really? You have two kids, that's great. I only have one daughter, but raising kids is hard work."
Hagoromo nodded in agreement. "Yeah, they fight every day. I don't know when it will end."
Ichiraku didn't turn his head and seriously made his ramen. "Sir, are you a ninja? You probably don't have much time to spend with your kids, which can make them rebellious. Just spend more time with them."
"Hmm... that makes sense. Another bowl of seafood to go."
...
Swain was pondering in the Uzumaki shrine, wondering why Orochimaru hadn't come yet.
Even though he would recover soon, it would still hurt...
A sinister voice came. "Swain, you always call me when something like this happens."
Swain instinctively punched Orochimaru, embedding him in the ground with a thud.
Orochimaru wasn't angry and smiled. "How is it, Swain? Is my body good?"
"Oh? You've become a man again? Why is your hair white? And what are those tear marks at the corners of your eyes? Wait! Why does your voice sound so annoying?
You didn't take Jiraiya's..."
Orochimaru turned around as if showing off. "That's right! Swain, your genes don't work no matter how I replicate them, so I had to use the genes of another Senjutsu master, plus my own genes, and scraps of your soul to help.
Now I can also instantly activate Senjutsu, and my lifespan has been extended without limit!"
"You're really a genius. So are you going back to Konoha with a new look now?"
Orochimaru grinned, still like a snake. "After the teacher dies gloriously and Danzo is torn to pieces!"
Swain was a little helpless. "Actually, I think the Third Hokage wants to live a couple more years... My crow reported that he's been having a great time with Jiraiya lately.
I don't care if Danzo dies or not, the sooner he dies, the sooner he's reborn."
Orochimaru's sinister eyes suddenly froze. That makes sense... So why did I let the teacher die?
"Stop thinking about it. Hurry up and release that half of the Nine Tails. I'm waiting to go back to the sacred place to play with monkeys and tease turtles."
"Yes, Swain."
Orochimaru's two tear marks visibly extended down to his neck, and two dragon horns grew from the top of his head. His white clothes fluttered without any wind.
Then he slowly put on a mask that he sensed was different.
He slashed himself with a knife!
Swain's third eye opened, and he quickly sucked out that half of the Nine Tails, along with the Fourth Hokage's soul.
The God of Death was unhappy about being cut open and wanted to eat Orochimaru with its long mouth.
Swain threw out a ball of soul scraps and took off the mask from Orochimaru.
Orochimaru's abdomen visibly healed under the operation of Senjutsu Chakra.
The God of Death swallowed the soul scraps with a disgusting, satisfied expression and disappeared into the shrine.
Swain asked Orochimaru, "What does it feel like to give birth?"
Orochimaru joked, "I don't think Minato will call me Dad."
Swain sighed. "That's not right. Back in the day, the Buddha was swallowed by a peacock, and he came out of the peacock's belly and respected the peacock as his Buddha mother. You took the initiative to sacrifice yourself and cut yourself open to let the Fourth Hokage out, so he should call you Dad."
Namikaze Minato's voice sounded in Swain's third eye. "Swain, can I refuse? I don't think Orochimaru would like that title."
Swain paused. "Huh? Minato, how can you talk to me?"
That shouldn't be. This is my world. How could Minato actively communicate?
Namikaze Minato didn't understand either. "I don't know. After you pulled me out, Swain, a little doll opened its mouth and ate me, then turned into my appearance. After that, I seemed to have consciousness, and then I could communicate with you."
Swain wanted to give Namikaze Minato an award. "You truly deserve to be the father of fate. You replaced my world's spirit."
From now on, Namikaze Minato would be like a butler of Swain's world.
The downside is that Minato can never be resurrected.
Because Minato is no longer a person.
It was also a coincidence that the world's spirit, which had not yet developed self-awareness and only had instincts, ate Minato but perfectly accepted everything about Minato and became Minato.
The other half of the Nine Tails, with its lackluster fur, obediently lay in place, very well-behaved.
"Finally, this is some compensation to the Nine Tails."
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