Rena returned to her apartment, went in for a quick bath before dressing up in a simple layered dress.
She then took a taxi to the address given.
All the way she was somewhat antsy, biting her lips in nervousness.
When she arrived at the building, she took in a breath before meeting with the receptionist to assign her in the room Herman had settled in.
The private room was a spacious space with soft lighting and an elegant decor.
Herman sat on a seat operating his phone but when he saw Rena come in, he dropped it and smiled.
Rena sat across him, her palms feeling a bit wet and sticky.
Herman spoke first. "What do you want?"
He handed her a menu.
Rena glommed at it for a while before picking out a few dishes.
They were not expensive nor cheap either, just right for her budget.
Not wasting much time, the waiter served them and left briskly, leaving the room in its usual quietness.
Rena ate her meal.
The taste was praiseworthy but her stomach subtly churned, a testament to her anxiety.
"What is it you have to say?" Herman rose a brow, feeling suspicious. "Days ago, you called me and wanted a meeting to discuss something."
Rena felt quite troubled but she knew she couldn't avoid this, not any longer.
Just as Mildred said, it could count as deceit.
She couldn't bear to do that. Agreeing to a marriage with such a crucial secret sealed was not right no matter how you look at it.
She couldn't bear to have him hate her later on.
She gathered all courage and said stiffly. "You asked to marry me and I consented, so I have to thoroughly tell you all about myself especially that of things you should know."
Herman paused.
He could tell it wasn't so simple, something was weighing on her mind but he tried to calm his emotions and nodded for her to continue.
"I had told you before of my classmate — the man you saw... kissing me last time."
Herman's expression turned ugly, a twinge of anger dashed across his gaze.
He couldn't help but think.
Had that man approached her again? Did they kiss? Did they... take it further?
His anger doubled.
That couldn't be possible. No.
The spy he had sent to watch over her hadn't given any negative reports.
He had only got reported of the rumors ongoing at her dining workplace.
But he had investigated it. If she had truly made out with that Archie, they of course wouldn't be talking peacefully now.
Though he knew he had tried to assault her but why should he care? As far as she remained untouched, he doesn't mind who inappropriately touches her skin.
Rena saw his unpleasant countenance but resumed however.
The more she spoke — the deeper she went, the softer her tone became.
"We met in a tutoring class for grade 12 examiners..."
"Why are you talking about him? I don't want to know." His voice remained placid as if he was not vexed inside.
Was that why she wanted a meetup? To talk about that man? Did she want to break up with him?
He tried to suppress his dissatisfaction but it still showed on his face.
Rena sighed. "Let me finish."
She wasn't having it easy either. Recalling those past memories were utterly painful for her.
She felt a tremor on her body and instinctively touched her stomach.
There a child once laid — tiny, feeble but living.
But what did she do?
She failed him. She was too unreliable. She was awfully useless. She watched him suffer so slowly before dying quite a miserable death.
Her skin turned pale as her eyes faintly reddened.
She could remember meeting Lester in that tutoring class. It was a lesson held by her highschool but it also accommodates students from other schools.
Out of the few nonlocal students, Lester was the most distinctive, mostly due to his appearance.
Many girls crushed on him but Rena was different. She only focused on her studies. Even if she dares to admire him, she could only do it secretly or else her parents might severely discipline her.
At that time, her parents were so strict on her.
Being extremely poor, they wanted her to attend university and in the future be the cash cow of the family.
Rena was busy trying to live up to their expectations, who would have guess her path would cross with Lester, an arrogant rich lad?
That day a bunch of classmates were pressuring her to do their assignments.
As usual, Rena a frail, timid girl would be forced to agree so easily but that day Rena was really not feeling well and admitted she didn't have the strength to do it.
The classmates grew angry and almost beat her up when Lester somehow appeared like a prince charming saving the damsel in distress.
From that day onwards, they became friends.
Two people with contrast characters — one weak, fearful, the other arrogant and bold.
It was a wonder how they got along.
But they really did, very well.
She could still clearly hear those words, soothing and pleasing with a teasing undertone to her ears.
But his words were resolute, overpowering and a vow.
"Rena, I promise you this, I shall never leave you."
He lied.
On the night of his birthday, fueled by alcohol, they both slept together for the first time ever.
When Rena woke up, he was gone with only a heart wrenching message left on the bedside table, never to be seen again.
Soon her symptoms heightened and her pregnancy was uncovered.
Her parents, immensely furious dealt with her so hard she lost blood and fainted.
While she was taken to the clinic, the national highschool certificate examination was ongoing.
She missed it fueling much to her parents' ire.
Thus, even when the pregnancy was saved, she was yet taken away to her grandmother's place to be taken care of.
But her grandmother was a vile woman who only cared about herself.
Rena was ruthlessly locked in a squalid room, left to eat sand and dust with only a few little meals served every two days.
How could Rena bear such treatment? When she was with child no less?
Rena did indeed tried to persist. She really tried.
She ate wood, her nails, even her flesh, anything digestible but the pregnancy only lasted five months before the fetus gave up.
No one could understand how agonized Rena felt.
How dispirited. How depressed.
Her lover had deserted her so as her parents. The child she sought comfort in suddenly died, much to her despair.
Rena remembered weeping and screaming so crazily the moment the rural midwives held tightly onto her hands and feet to abort her dead child.
The rust tools was inserted in, drawing out a pile of thick bloody clots and meat.
It was an horrifying experience, one she wouldn't be able to forget in her lifetime.
After that it seemed her grandmother's heart softened and she no longer locked her up.
But Rena was like a shadow of herself. A lost soul.
She became a mute, uncaring to everything around her.
Even when the grandmother fell so sick to the point she wasn't able to walk, she didn't bother to help or spare her a glance.
Thus her grandmother died in anguish, in her own bodily excrements.
The first time Rena met her family again was at the funeral but they didn't seem to want to take her back.
They seemed to have changed greatly. Her mother's eyes even blazed with indifference at her presence.
Rena was sent out homeless, with only ten bucks in hand.
Her mind then was full of confusion and pain.
Why did her parents no longer care about her? Was it because she had disappointed them greatly?
She couldn't wrap her head around it but she knew from the day forth she was alone and had to survive.
During her harsh times on the slums, she encountered a woman who was a talented herbalist and somewhat skilled at acupuncture.
The woman took her in as an apprentice and taught her well.
It was during the woman's last days that she told her something was wrong with her womb and that she should check it out.
Rena did go for a checkup at a clinic and got a report.
That was when she discovered to her horror that her uterus had been severely wounded and downright ruined by the rust tools years ago.
Rena felt herself trembling. She took continuous deep breaths to calm down.
Those memories were tremendously traumatizing to her, she indeed lived much miserably.
"Are you alright?" Herman couldn't help but ask.
Rena looked overly pale and her eyes were sheerly misty with tears.
She heaved a bitter smile, feeling a self derision before quickly cutting to the chase.
"Herman, eight years ago I was pregnant with that man's child but I lost both the pregnancy and my womb. Right now, am sterile. I can no longer birth nor can I fertile a child."
Her voice was low and measured but she could still see Herman's extremely shocked expression before she turned her gaze away.