The realization stayed with me for days.
Quiet.
Heavy.
Impossible to ignore once it appeared.
I tried pretending nothing had changed.
I went to class. Came back to the dorm. Answered Chloe when she talked to me. Ignored Ryan's messages.
Normal.
Everything looked normal from the outside.
But internally, I felt completely thrown off balance.
Because every time Ethan crossed my mind now, my chest reacted before my brain could.
And that terrified me.
I didn't want this.
I didn't want to be the girl who suddenly developed feelings for someone just because they were kind to her for a week.
That sounded pathetic.
Embarrassing.
And worse—confusing.
Because I still couldn't pinpoint when things changed.
Was it the lake?
The hot chocolate?
The way he always noticed when I was upset without forcing me to explain?
Or was it simply because he had made college feel less lonely for a little while?
I didn't know.
And that uncertainty made everything harder.
A few days later, I walked into the student center after class to grab coffee before heading back to the dorm.
The place was crowded like usual.
People sat around tables studying, talking, laughing too loudly.
I kept my head down as I waited in line.
Then I heard a familiar laugh.
My stomach tightened instantly.
Ethan.
I looked up before I could stop myself.
He was standing near the far side of the room with a group of people. Chloe was there too, sitting on the edge of a table while talking animatedly about something.
Ethan glanced at her and laughed again.
That ache returned immediately.
Sharp.
Annoying.
I looked away so fast it almost made me dizzy.
My chest felt tight again.
This is ridiculous.
I stared at the menu board above the counter like my life depended on it.
But I could still hear them laughing behind me.
And somehow that made it worse.
By the time I got my coffee, I just wanted to leave.
Fast.
I turned too quickly while walking away and nearly bumped straight into someone.
"Oh—sorry," I muttered automatically.
"It's okay."
I froze.
Ethan.
Of course.
He stood there holding a drink, looking slightly surprised to see me this close.
For a second, neither of us moved.
Then he smiled faintly.
"Mia."
Just hearing him say my name made my chest betray me again.
"Hi," I said quietly.
"You disappeared for a while."
I blinked.
What?
"I… went home for a bit."
"Oh."
He nodded slowly.
"You okay now?"
The question was simple.
Casual.
But somehow it made my throat tighten unexpectedly.
"Yeah," I answered quickly.
Ethan looked at me for a second like he wasn't fully convinced.
Then Chloe noticed us from behind him.
"Mia!"
I looked over automatically.
She smiled brightly.
"Come sit with us."
Panic hit me instantly.
"Oh—I was actually going back to the dorm."
"You literally just got here," Chloe said.
"I have reading to do."
That was a lie.
A very obvious lie.
But I couldn't sit there.
Not while my emotions were already this messy.
Chloe looked like she wanted to argue, but Ethan spoke first.
"Let her escape if she wants to."
There was amusement in his voice, soft and familiar.
My chest tightened again.
I hated how much one sentence affected me now.
"Thanks," I muttered quietly.
Then, before either of them could say anything else, I walked away.
Fast.
The entire walk back to the dorm, my thoughts felt chaotic.
Because now there was no denying it anymore.
No pretending.
No confusion left.
I liked him.
And somehow, that realization made everything feel worse instead of better.