As soon as Egrer spotted the elevator at the end of the hallway, a terrible premonition washed over him. He'd been jittery before, but right now, being just a stone's throw away from the Headmaster, his knees were shaking worse than usual. The exact same thoughts spun in his head over and over again, driving him to the brink of a nervous breakdown:
Am I seriously going to go against the strongest man in the world? What do I do if he says no? His decision was probably heavily weighed, most likely I'm just too dumb to get it.
Weiss and Nora stood right behind him, their mere presence pushing the Supreme Chairman of the Order of the Seat-Snatchers forward. He couldn't show weakness at such a crucial moment, especially in front of Weiss, who was just waiting for a good opportunity to stage a coup. So, gathering his resolve, Egrer slowly started putting one foot in front of the other.
The crimson sun, painting the hallway in evening hues, only added to the creepy vibe. Long shadows from the arched windows divided the path into five sections, and Egrer crossed each one with an ever-growing sense of anxiety.
"Don't you guys worry," he told the others. "The Headmaster is surely a very understanding person. What could he possibly do to us?"
"We aren't worrying," Nora noted, looking puzzled.
"Exactly, 'cause there's nothing to stress over. I mean, what's so scary about a little chat, right?"
"Right," Weiss nodded with the exact same puzzled look on her face. "Headmaster Ozpin is a mature and intelligent man. I'm sure he has the wisdom to admit his mistakes."
"Exactly, that's what I'm saying! I'm glad you get it! Everything's going to be fine, so you don't need to be so freaked out."
"We aren't... Oh-h-h, are you scared yourself?" it suddenly dawned on Nora.
"What? No-o-o," Egrer dragged out, waving her off. "I just said there's no reason to be afraid. Are you even listening to me?"
The distance was crossed. Before them stood the metal elevator doors in all their glory, their smooth surface hazily reflecting Egrer's goofy smile and Weiss and Nora exchanging glances. This was it—the Rubicon. And they would cross it if they pressed the yellow button on the side. It didn't call the elevator itself, but allowed them to contact the Headmaster, who would then decide whether the arriving student's problem was worth his attention.
The Supreme Chairman started hypnotizing it with his stare, but the button refused to press itself. Finally, spurred on by the impatient glares burning into his back, Egrer took the plunge.
"I'm listening?" the Headmaster's quiet voice came through the speakers a second later.
This was it—the Rubicon on top of the Rubicon. If he just said it was a mistake, a joke, or some dumb prank, they could turn back. But then Egrer would lose all respect in the Order and definitely lose his post. On the other hand, was some ephemeral "respect" really worth the goddamn clusterfuck that going toe-to-toe with the Headmaster of Beacon would bring? After all, Egrer wasn't some ten-year-old trying to flex in front of his peers; he was an almost fully formed adult personality! Suddenly, a sharp little elbow jabbed into his side.
"Say something," Weiss hissed.
"I'm thinking," he snapped back in the same tone, then cleared his throat. "H-Hello, Headmaster, this is Egrer Peleni. I would like to discuss the appointment of the leaders for teams JNPR, Majesty, and RWBY with you."
"Hmm..." the voice on the other end hummed with interest. "Do you have complaints or questions?"
"Uh-h-h..." Egrer turned around and looked at the others. Weiss held up one finger, while Nora held up two. "Yes."
"Very well." The elevator doors slid open, and Egrer reflexively took a step back. "Please, come in."
Once he stepped inside, that would be it—no turning back. This was it—the Rubicon on the Rubicon inside the Rubicon. It wasn't too late to just turn around and bounce. He could really do that; there were no obstacles, he just had to haul ass back the way he came.
His entire life flashed before his eyes: his childhood in the orphanage, old friends, the first chords on his Baby, his adoptive father and mother, his first time outside the walls of Mistral, traveling the world, the robberies, the setups, the espionage, the explosive escape from Torchwick's oppression, meeting Illmond, Yort, and Magenta, their life together, working at Junior's club, the brawl with the drunk Huntsman, the brawl with the blonde Huntress, flying into Initiation dangling from a rope, Initiation itself, and the fight with the Death Stalker...
Come to think of it, Egrer's life had been full of events and interesting adventures; it wouldn't be a shame to die after all that. So, fearlessly taking a step forward, he entered the elevator car and flashed a confident smile at Weiss and Nora. The doors closed, and a mere ten seconds later, they opened again at the very top of the tower.
And in that same amount of time, all his bravery suddenly vanished into thin air. Now there was definitely no way back. Absolutely zero. A single thought spun in his head: How did I agree to this? Am I really going to go up against the strongest man in the world?
The strongest man in the world was sitting at his desk, stirring his coffee with a spoon. Right now, he looked more than ever like a kind grandpa: the same glasses, the same old-fashioned suit, the small smile. If you ignored his young face, you could honestly guess he was around sixty, if not older. And this very same man could effortlessly wipe out a medium-sized horde of Grimm all by himself...
"Hello, Mr. Peleni."
"Y-Yes, hello Headmaster..." Only now did he realize that he didn't know the man's last name. Maybe he didn't even have one? Everyone—students, teachers, and even the media—just called the Headmaster by his first name. "...Headmaster Ozpin."
*Tick-tock, tick-tock.*
The gears under the glass floor clicked and ticked quietly—the mechanism was turning the giant clock outside. Egrer shifted his weight from one foot to the other, still standing in the elevator car, not daring to step any further without an invitation. Although, since he'd been let into the elevator itself, did that count as an invitation? He didn't know, but he preferred not to risk it.
"Have a seat." Ozpin gestured to the chair in front of his desk. Egrer finally walked in, fidgeting with his jacket sleeve and tripping over flat ground twice on the way.
"Thank you."
"So, Mr. Peleni, I am all ears."
Damn it, where do I even start?!
"You see, not everyone is happy with their leaders..." Egrer flinched and hurried to smooth things over. "Well, not that unhappy, although some are very unhappy, but not like, too unhappy."
"Yes," the Headmaster nodded.
Gods, what am I rambling about? I need to get a grip! Pull yourself together, you wimp!
Whenever Egrer started to panic, his dad would always smack him upside the head. It worked like a charm; after that kind of therapy, he could break into a secret Atlas military facility without throwing a fit, or jump behind the controls of an airplane he was seeing for the first time. But to just up and slap himself right in front of the Headmaster... What if the man thought Egrer was crazy? What if he expelled him?
"W-Well, we've compiled a list of things that... um, we aren't entirely satisfied with." Egrer held out the piece of paper with their demands and grievances written on it. "Not that unsatisfied, well, you know what I mean. I-I came to discuss this."
"You wish to challenge my decision, am I correct?" The tone of voice he used... calm, rational, interested, slightly judgmental, and even a bit encouraging. One thing was certain: Ozpin found this whole situation highly amusing.
"Yes..." Egrer finally unspooled his tongue. "If you'll allow me..."
Shit, why am I asking for his permission? What do I do if he says no? Leave? Start arguing? I really should have just sent Weiss in here.
"Well then, I am ready to hear your position." The Headmaster placed his coffee on the desk and intertwined his fingers, hiding a smile behind them. The light of the setting sun reflected off his glasses, creating an otherworldly glow and an aura of mystery around Ozpin.
Why do I get the feeling he's been practicing that exact pose for years?
"Um, right." Egrer shook his head, snapping out of his daze, and looked down at his paper. It suddenly felt totally insignificant and useless, but he forced himself to read out every single point written on it anyway.
"I see," Ozpin summarized. "Don't you think you are jumping to conclusions a bit too quickly? It has only been one day since the start of your studies."
"I won't judge the others, but my team definitely needs a different leader," Egrer pointed out carefully.
"For instance, you, Mr. Peleni?" He was trying to embarrass him, trying to make him feel like a vain egotist. But Egrer didn't take the bait.
"Yes. They're already used to listening to my orders, even keeping in mind that Magenta is 'in charge'. I've been learning how to manage this freak show for a long time, you know."
"I understand," the Headmaster nodded, his voice taking on an all-penetrating quality. "You feel that Ms. Toti's appointment to this post is a personal insult, as if your leadership qualities, after all you've been through, have failed to make the grade. You must feel slighted."
"That too," Egrer didn't bother arguing with the obvious. "But Magenta really isn't fit for this role. She's... well, you know, we treat her like a little puppy." Ozpin raised an intrigued eyebrow. "I mean, a puppy is cute and all, even if it sometimes craps on the rug and zooms around the room at 3 AM. That last part actually happened a couple of times with Madge, by the way. We love her, but we're never going to take her seriously. You get what I mean?"
"Building authority doesn't happen that quickly. You didn't earn your weight in the group overnight, either."
"Yeah, and it cost me a lot of nerves." Egrer kept in mind that sitting in front of him was a freaking wizard who had somehow managed to sweet-talk even Yort. Every word out of his mouth was inherently a trap, a provocation, or some kind of trick. He had to stay on his toes!
"And yet, I find your demands too hasty. Don't you think drawing such conclusions in the very first twenty-four hours is inappropriate? Give your leaders a chance; I assure you, they will prove themselves."
"And don't you think that if three students write a petition against their leaders in the very first twenty-four hours," Egrer waved his piece of paper around, amazed at his own audacity, "that it means something?"
"It only means that you are jumping to conclusions," Ozpin repeated for what felt like the hundredth time, maintaining his serene composure.
"So you're refusing to accept our demands?" The Headmaster nodded and leaned back in his chair. A mug of steaming coffee was suddenly back in his hands. "Then at least tell me why you appointed these specific leaders? You must have been guided by something when making the choice, right? Like, putting together a detailed psychological profile, maybe?"
The Headmaster hid a smile in his mug, and Egrer shuddered as that terrible premonition, which had almost faded by now, reared its ugly head once more.
"First, I will ask you to sign a non-disclosure agreement."
***
Egrer stumbled out of the elevator, shocked and crushed. It was as if the gods themselves had come down and banned him from playing the guitar, or his dad had suddenly become a kindergarten teacher. He walked down the empty hallway with his eyes wide open, jaw twitching, and hands trembling. Even a rookie psychologist would have diagnosed a supreme state of shock and the onset of a personality disorder triggered by the shattering of every conceivable paradigm.
Egrer tried to erase the last fifteen minutes of his life from his head, but it only aggravated the fresh, unhealed wounds on his sanity.
"This is the Team Wheel, Mr. Peleni." Ozpin pointed to a baffling jumble of steel rings that looked more like an orrery housing fifty celestial bodies. The largest rings crossed the equator and poles of a sphere barely visible at the center of the contraption.
"I-I s-see," Egrer dragged out. Beacon's basement had a lot of weird stuff in general. For example, a statue of a golden lemur, an action figure of some comic book superhero that oinked when squeezed, thirty-three left boots of the exact same color, and the skeleton of a cat. To think, something actually dropped dead down here...
All this junk was scattered in the corners of a massive room that felt more like a hangar than a basement. On the wall opposite the elevator, some kind of pod glowed with a dim white light. It was too far away, making it pretty hard to get a good look at it.
"What's that over there?"
"Nothing of interest, pay it no mind. Let me demonstrate how the Team Wheel works instead."
Egrer shook his head and slapped himself. He recalled thinking the Headmaster was at least relatively normal, and that he drew his power from that very normalcy.
He had never been so wrong.
Ozpin was completely unhinged, even by Huntsman standards! He just hid it really well! You should never judge a book by its cover, they teach you that from the cradle. But for some reason, that wisdom is usually applied when talking about ugly or weird-looking people. Solid, respectable-looking men get a free pass and nothing but praise.
"Psst! Supreme Chairman!" came a whisper from the side. Egrer peeked out the window and saw Nora and Weiss hiding in the bushes. The latter was grumbling almost inaudibly, trying to break free from the private's grip, but to no avail—they were in completely different weight classes.
"What are you guys doing out there?"
"Awaiting your arrival, Supreme Chairman!" Nora reported, sporting a pair of black grease stripes on her cheeks. A wreath of twigs and leaves adorned her ginger head.
"Okay, let's agree first that outside of the Order's meetings, we call each other by our names. We shouldn't act suspicious."
"Sir, yes sir, Eg!"
"You idiot," Weiss hissed. "By 'suspicious', he means continuing to crouch in the bushes. Why did you even drag me in here?! We could have just waited by the exit."
"Sir, yes sir, Weiss!" They stepped out of the bushes, and the heiress frantically began picking leaves and twigs out of her platinum hair. She was a neat freak, practically sterile, whereas Nora couldn't care less about such things. "How did it go?"
"The Headmaster refused to accept our demands."
"Then it's war," the Valkyrie nodded to herself.
"God forbid, no war!" Egrer panicked. Just the thought of entering a direct confrontation with someone like Ozpin sent shivers down his spine. "We're going to act carefully; we're a secret order, remember?"
"A-a-ah, right." She slapped her forehead. "Keeps slipping my mind. So, we're going to commit acts of terrorism and intimidation?"
"No," Weiss snapped. "Don't even think about it, you hear me? We aren't some terrorists like the White Fang; we are capable of civilized dialogue."
"Agreed, we still have to study at this academy for another four years. I wouldn't want it blown to pieces before I graduate." Nora started grumbling something about buzzkills and how nobody ever gets her jokes.
"Did the Headmaster explain his reasoning for appointing the leaders?" Weiss asked, forcing Egrer to relive that nightmare all over again.
"Let me demonstrate how the Team Wheel works instead. Suppose we want to pick a new name for your team. To do this, we need stickers with words where the first letter corresponds to the first letter of a team member's name. Glynda hasn't cleaned up down here yet, so the old options are still present." Ozpin pulled a pen from his jacket and crossed out the words "Macaroni," "Jalapeno," "Entropy," and "Igloo." The rings with them overlapped in certain places, and Egrer realized with absolute horror that he was looking at the word "MJEnsty," in which "Majesty" was easily recognizable. His sanity was slowly leaking out of his skull...
"Hold on! You promised to tell me how you choose leaders, not team names." It was, of course, a groundbreaking revelation that names were generated in such a bizarre way, but he was here for something else.
"You see, these are interconnected things, I will explain everything in a moment. Done." The Headmaster put his pen away; above the crossed-out words now sat slightly scribbled "Judo," "Masterpiece," "Evasion," and "Ego." He grabbed one of the dozens of rings in the incredibly convoluted mechanism and gave it a light push.
The orrery began to spin. Every now and then, the rings bumped into each other with a resonant clang and bounced back; in other cases, they passed right through one another thanks to slits cut in certain places. For a while, primal chaos reigned supreme. It was completely baffling how this contraption could even spin like this—it should have fallen apart!
You could have easily built something like this on a computer, and then you wouldn't have to hide it from the students in a basement. But remembering that Ozpin adored all sorts of clockwork and antiques, it was safe to assume he didn't know jack shit about modern technology.
A minute later, everything came to a halt. The sticker-covered rings, overlapping each other, formed "Egxhbtnsm."
"As you can see, it doesn't always work on the first try. Although, from this set of letters, one can easily recognize the word 'Exhibitionism'."
"I see," Egrer mumbled, practically speechless. "And... who... who is the—?"
"The leader? You are. Because your letter comes first."
"So you're saying that if I were the leader, my team would be called Exhibitionism?!"
"It is very difficult to come up with a name using your first initial." The Headmaster neither confirmed nor denied it, which was even more depressing. "And one of the main requirements for a team name is that it sounds similar to the leader's name. You must admit, they sound wonderful: CRDL - Cardin, RWBY - Ruby, MJST - Magenta, CFVY - Coco. It got a bit awkward with team JNPR, but we can just pretend that Jaune is spelled with a J. His name is also quite tricky to build a team name around."
*Build?! It's completely random, you aren't even thinking at all!* Egrer screamed in his head, though he didn't let his true feelings leak into his voice.
"Headmaster, I... I don't know whether to cry or run around in circles..." Too many impressions, too much stress—he felt like he was losing his mind. "So, however the rings turn, that person ends up being the leader?"
"Correct," Ozpin replied with absolute calm. He took a sip from his mug and pointed at the contraption. "Before my invention, the teaching staff could agonize over this question for days on end. Some teams didn't get a name until a week after the school year began, but now, it's just a matter of a couple of spins of the Team Wheel."
Egrer clutched his head and bit his lip. If it weren't for his Aura, he would have ended up with a chunk of his own flesh in his mouth right now. The pain helped him claw his way out of the depths of his memories and return to the real world.
"The Headmaster told me, but he demanded I sign a non-disclosure agreement." He pulled his copy of the document out of his pants pocket, which Weiss immediately snatched from him. She quickly skimmed it.
"Hmmm..." The heiress to a multi-billion-Lien corporation pondered for a moment and seemed to figure out how to circumvent the law. After all, she would be a terrible heiress if she didn't know how big business played the game. "What do you have to say about the weather?"
"Um... It's nice weather." But Egrer's father hadn't been a billionaire, so he completely missed her weird subtext.
"So you're satisfied with everything?" she asked pointedly.
"Well... yeah?" He scratched the back of his head uncertainly. "Warm breeze, the sun isn't baking us."
"No, you don't get me. What do you have to say about the weather? You were in the Headmaster's office for a long time. What do you say about the weather now?"
"A-a-ah." The hidden meaning of her words finally reached Egrer's brain. He gave her a conspiratorial wink. "It's absolutely terrible. The wind has completely messed up my hair. Plus, you never know when it's going to rain or when the sun will take over again. I fucking hate weather forecasts, it's just pure, utter RNG that they try to pass off as the weighed opinion of experts."
"That's complete bullshit... Is it really that bad?" Weiss was shocked.
"Like I said, I hate weather forecasts, and their head meteorologist is a total freak, to be honest."
"I feel like I'm the only one missing something here." Nora looked back and forth between the Supreme Chairman and his deputy in confusion.
"I suggest we discuss this later. It's already late."
***
"Where the hell have you been wandering?" Yort asked when Egrer returned to their dorm room.
"You're not my wife, so stop busting my balls about it." He looked around and let out a low whistle. "You guys set this place up pretty nicely without me. Missed all the fun."
A huge TV opposite the door immediately caught his eye. Its left half rested on wooden beams hammered right into the wall, while the right side sat on the windowsill, blocking out one of the two windows. The plaster had crumbled a bit around the beams, but someone had tried to cover it up with superhero stickers. Under the TV was a bed, and it wasn't hard to guess whose it was: the dumbbells poking out from underneath, the placement itself, and the fact that Yort was sitting squarely on it were pretty dead giveaways.
Along the wall, to the left of the door, sat a desk with a chair and their musical instruments: Egrer and Illmond's guitars, a synthesizer, as well as a large box containing the drum kit, which now had a vase of flowers perched on top. Yort had most likely put it there himself; there was no one else. As if he'd ever let another person touch his baby? That drum kit was his second most prized possession after the TV.
Magenta's corner looked exactly like Magenta's corner—she had already managed to paint the wall in an indescribable mishmash of colors, branding it with the word "MAJESTY". True, the lettering kind of got lost against the rainbow backdrop, but once you noticed it, you couldn't unsee it.
Illmond and his belongings were shoved into the corner opposite Magenta, and just looking at the mess over there made Egrer's hands itch to start cleaning. The wannabe artist didn't care about hygiene at all; he had simply tossed all his clothes onto the headboard, left his shoes by the door, and haphazardly plastered the walls with anime posters featuring half-naked anime girls.
For a guy with a severe case of perfectionism, such a pigsty was totally abnormal. Though, maybe this mess was a beautiful creative space for him, and every element had a strictly calibrated position to create the "perfectly-imperfect order-chaos". Or something like that. Egrer wasn't particularly eager to dig into his twisted brain.
And right in the middle, sandwiched between Yort's and Magenta's territories, lay an empty, made bed, boxed in on all sides by whatever crap didn't fit into the others' zones. This was the spot for their unofficial alpha.
"A bit cramped in here," he summarized. "Maybe we should stack the beds into bunks and—"
"NO!" the pack replied in unison. Apparently, they were sick to death of bunk beds.
"Then pitch your own ideas. Because I have zero intention of sleeping buried under your junk."
"You showed up late to the turf war, and now you're making demands?" Yort crossed his arms over his chest.
"Either you shove this mess into your own corners, or I'm tossing it out the window." The threat went right over their heads and scared absolutely no one. Did they think he wouldn't actually do it? Then they were severely underestimating his love for tidiness.
"Why are you bossing everyone around? In case you forgot, Madge is in charge."
"Right!" The girl jumped up. "I'm the leaderess!"
"It's just leader," an irritated Egrer corrected her. He had earned his authority and the right to command them all with blood, sweat, and tears, and the Headmaster had picked her just because her name sounded good with the team acronym! Total bullshit.
"But I'm a girl, so I'm a leaderess." Fighting her logic was as pointless as trying to write on paper with milk.
"Whatever, just order them to clear out some space here. I swear I'm gonna throw all this out."
"No." Magenta stood on the bed to give her words more weight. She jabbed a finger at Egrer and stated in a tone that brooked no argument: "I order you not to throw anything away!"
"Why the hell should I listen to you?" he countered, taking a step forward.
"Ooh, someone's getting his feathers ruffled."
"Shut the fuck up, Yort."
"My order is my order!" Magenta no longer looked quite so confident. "Don't throw anything out, it's our stuff."
"Well, if it's yours, then scatter it around your own sections of the room. Because as long as it's on my territory, it's mine. I'll do whatever the hell I want with it!" Egrer grabbed a box of random metal parts and moved menacingly toward the unblocked window.
"Wait, wait!" Magenta blocked his path. "Those are spare parts for Colorful Rainbow, you can't throw them away! I forbid it!"
"Madge, a leader's duty isn't just ordering whatever pops into their head; it's treating everyone with respect. Think back to how I arranged our lives in that tiny one-room apartment: Yort had enough space to work out, if Ill decided to nap during the day, I reeled you guys in when you were being too loud, and you, Madge, did whatever the hell you wanted, and we never said a word against it. No one was left out. Am I wrong?!" Egrer looked around at everyone in the room. "And this is how you repay me."
"Why are you getting so worked up over some trash?" Yort asked, not looking an ounce ashamed, unlike the others.
"The trash is just the last straw. I had questions about Ozpin's decision before, but only now do I realize that he definitely screwed up."
"Do you think I'm a bad leader?.." Magenta asked, sounding deflated.
"I think you just don't have the personality to command people." Egrer softened his tone. He didn't want to push her too hard. "Don't think I hate you because you took my spot. It's just that each of us is good at our own thing. We already have established roles in the team, and shuffling them around will only make things worse. You're our mascot, but definitely not a leader."
"And you won't even give me a chance?"
"Madge, this isn't a new flavor of ice cream you can just sample; it's a massive responsibility."
"I understand," Magenta nodded, never lifting her head. Carefully, as if afraid to piss Egrer off even more, she took the box from his hands. "Let's sort out our stuff, guys."
They all silently began following her instructions. Egrer had managed not only to get his way but to shame them into it. Yet, he felt no joy that justice had triumphed or that he had been right. They went to sleep in total silence. A pretty shitty first day at Beacon, all things considered...
*Ring-ring.*
Ah right, the Malachite twins were supposed to call again today. At least it wasn't at 1 AM this time, so that was a plus. Hiding under the blanket, Egrer opened his Scroll and turned the volume all the way down. He wasn't really in the mood for idle chatter right now, but he slapped a smile on his face anyway and accepted the call.