ROOM 7
Chapter Fifteen: The Amusement Park
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The fifth day of the trip started with Yuri screaming.
"WAKE UP! WAKE UP! WE'RE GOING TO THE AMUSEMENT PARK!"
"Yuri, it's six in the morning," Mica groaned from somewhere in the house.
"THE PARK OPENS AT NINE! IT'S AN HOUR AWAY! WE NEED TO LEAVE BY SEVEN!"
"We don't need to leave by seven."
"WE NEED TO LEAVE BY SEVEN!"
"We really don't."
"WE NEED TO LEAVE BY SIX-THIRTY!"
"That's not how time works."
"TIME IS WHAT WE MAKE IT!"
Mica put her pillow over her head. Calix laughed. The house woke up in chaos, as it always did, as it always would.
Jay was already awake. She was sitting on the porch, watching the volcano, a cup of coffee in her hands. Black, no sugar. The way Keifer made it.
He sat down beside her. "You're up early."
"I'm always up early."
"Today you're up earlier."
She looked at him. "I'm excited."
"You're excited for an amusement park?"
"I've never been to one."
He stared at her. "Never?"
"My parents didn't do amusement parks. Too many people. Too much chaos. Too many variables they couldn't control."
"So you've never ridden a roller coaster?"
"No."
"Never had cotton candy?"
"No."
"Never played one of those rigged games where you win a stuffed animal that breaks in a week?"
She shook her head.
He looked at her for a long moment. Then he smiled. "Today's going to be a good day."
She tried not to smile back. She failed.
---
Part One: The Park
The amusement park was loud.
Music played from everywhere. People shouted. Children ran. Rides creaked and groaned and sent screams into the sky. The air smelled like popcorn and sugar and something fried.
Yuri ran ahead. "ROLLER COASTER FIRST!"
"Yuri, wait—" Mica started.
Too late. He was already in line.
Lyra laughed. "He's like a child."
"A very loud child," Alex said.
"A very hungry child."
"The hungriest child."
They looked at each other. Lyra smiled. Alex smiled. Neither of them said anything else.
Care and Cole were already arguing about which ride was safest. Cole said the Ferris wheel. Care said the bumper cars. They were both wrong. They were both right. They were both holding hands while they argued.
Freya and Erdix were taking photos of everything. The entrance. The ticket booth. The cotton candy stand. The way the sunlight hit the roller coaster tracks.
Mica and Calix were planning the route. Carousel first. Then the log flume. Then lunch. Then the roller coaster. Then games. Then the Ferris wheel at sunset.
David was at the snack stand, buying enough food for everyone.
Jay stood at the entrance, watching.
Keifer stood beside her. "You okay?"
"Loud."
"It's an amusement park."
"There are so many people."
"We don't have to stay. We can go somewhere else. A café. A park. Somewhere quiet."
She looked at him. "You'd leave? For me?"
"I'd leave anywhere for you."
She stared at him for a long moment. Then she looked at the park. At the lights. At the rides. At her friends running ahead, laughing, being young.
"I want to stay," she said.
"Are you sure?"
"I'm sure." She looked at him. "I want to ride a roller coaster. I want to eat cotton candy. I want to win a stuffed animal that breaks in a week."
He smiled. "Then let's go."
---
Part Two: The Roller Coaster
The roller coaster was terrifying.
Jay stood in line, watching the cars go up and down, listening to the screams, feeling her heart pound. Keifer was beside her, close enough to touch but not touching.
"You don't have to do this," he said.
"I want to."
"Your hands are shaking."
"I'm excited."
"You're terrified."
She looked at him. "I'm both."
The line moved. They got closer. The screams got louder. The cars got faster.
"Keifer?"
"Yeah?"
"If I die on this ride, tell my mom I love her."
"You're not going to die."
"Tell my dad I'm sorry for all the arguments."
"You're not going to die."
"Tell Percy he can have my highlighters."
"Jay."
"Tell—"
He put his hand on her arm. Just for a moment. Just to stop her. Then he let go.
"You're not going to die," he said. "I'm right here."
She looked at his hand. At his face. At the way he was looking at her like she was the only thing in the world worth seeing.
The car arrived. She got in. He sat beside her. The harness clicked down. The car started moving.
She grabbed the bar. He didn't touch her. He just sat beside her, close enough to be there, far enough to let her breathe.
The car climbed. Higher. Higher. Higher. The park spread out below them. The mountains in the distance. The sky so blue it hurt to look at.
She closed her eyes.
"Jay. Look."
She opened her eyes.
The world dropped.
She screamed. He laughed. The wind was in her hair, her stomach was in her throat, the world was a blur of color and sound and speed and him beside her.
The car slowed. The ride ended. The harness lifted.
She was breathing hard. Her heart was pounding. She looked at him.
He was looking at her. "Well?"
She smiled. "Again."
---
Part Three: The Games
They rode the roller coaster three more times.
Then the log flume, where Yuri fell out of the boat and into the water. Then the spinning teacups, where everyone got sick except David. Then the bumper cars, where Yuri declared himself champion and immediately crashed into a pole.
Jay was laughing. Actually laughing. The kind of laugh that came from somewhere deep, somewhere she'd been hiding for years.
Keifer watched her. He couldn't stop watching her. The way her hair flew when she laughed. The way her eyes crinkled. The way she looked at him like she'd forgotten to be scared.
They walked toward the game booths. Yuri was trying to win a giant bear. Lyra was cheering. Alex was watching. Care and Cole were arguing about which game had the best odds. Freya was taking photos. David was eating cotton candy.
Jay stopped at a booth. Ring toss. A row of bottles. A basket of rings. A shelf of prizes.
"I want the shark," she said.
Keifer looked at the prize. A stuffed shark. Blue. Small. Reminded him of Bruce.
"Then win it," he said.
She picked up a ring. She threw it. It bounced off the bottles. She picked up another. Missed. Another. Missed.
"You're terrible at this," he said.
"I'm strategizing."
"You're missing."
"I'm calculating trajectory."
"You're throwing rings at bottles."
"That's what the game is."
"You're supposed to land them on the bottles."
"I know how the game works."
"Then why aren't you winning?"
She glared at him. "Are you going to help or just stand there?"
He picked up a ring. He threw it. It landed perfectly on a bottle. The booth attendant handed him the shark.
He held it out to her.
She stared at it. "You won it."
"You wanted it."
"I wanted to win it."
"You wanted the shark. You have the shark."
She took it from his hands. Their fingers touched. Neither of them pulled away.
"Thank you," she said.
"You're welcome."
She held the shark. It was soft. Blue. Reminded her of Bruce. Reminded her of him.
"You didn't have to do that," she said.
"I know."
"You did it anyway."
"I know."
She looked at him. "Why?"
He looked at her. "Because you wanted it."
She didn't know what to say. She didn't know what to feel. She just held the shark and looked at him and tried not to feel everything.
"Jay—" he started.
"LET'S GO! FERRIS WHEEL! SUNSET!" Yuri ran past them, dragging Lyra, who was dragging Alex, who was smiling.
Keifer laughed. "We should go."
"Yeah."
She walked beside him. The shark was in her arms. He was beside her. Close enough to touch. Not touching.
---
Part Four: The Girl
They were walking toward the Ferris wheel when it happened.
A girl approached them. Pretty. Confident. The kind of girl who knew exactly what she wanted.
She walked up to Keifer and smiled. "Hi."
Keifer stopped. "Hi?"
"You're cute. Are you here with anyone?"
Jay's feet stopped moving. Her hands tightened around the shark. Her heart started pounding. Hard. Fast. Loud.
Keifer looked at the girl. "I'm here with friends."
The girl looked at Jay. Then back at Keifer. "Just friends?"
Jay's jaw tightened.
Keifer's ears went red. "We're—"
"I'm here with friends too," the girl said, stepping closer. "But I'd rather be here with you."
Jay's hands were fists now. The shark was crushed between her fingers. Her heart was pounding. Her face was hot. Her chest was tight.
She didn't know what this feeling was. She'd never felt it before. It was hot and cold at the same time. It was anger and fear and something else. Something she didn't have a name for.
Keifer looked at Jay. Jay looked at the girl. The girl looked at Keifer.
The world narrowed to a single point.
"One ride?" the girl said. "The Ferris wheel? It's romantic at sunset."
Something snapped.
"Mark Keifer Watson."
The voice came from somewhere. It took Jay a moment to realize it was her own.
Keifer's head whipped around. "Jay—"
She was already moving. Her feet were carrying her forward. The shark fell from her arms. Her hands were reaching. Her heart was pounding. Her mind was screaming stop stop stop but her body wasn't listening.
She grabbed his collar.
She pulled him down.
She kissed him.
---
Part Five: The Kiss
It wasn't gentle.
It wasn't soft. It wasn't careful. It was desperate and angry and scared and everything she'd been holding back for fifteen years. Her hands were fisted in his shirt. Her lips were pressed against his. Her eyes were closed. Her heart was everywhere.
He made a sound. A small sound. A surprised sound. And then his hands were on her waist and he was kissing her back.
The world stopped.
The park was gone. The noise was gone. The girl was gone. There was only him. His lips. His hands. His heartbeat against hers.
She kissed him like she'd been wanting to kiss him since she was fourteen years old.
He kissed her like he'd been waiting for this his whole life.
And then—
She pulled back.
Her hands were still on his collar. His hands were still on her waist. Their faces were inches apart. Their breathing was heavy. Their hearts were pounding.
She looked at his lips. At his eyes. At the girl standing behind them, mouth open, staring.
She looked at her hands on his collar.
She looked at his hands on her waist.
She realized what she'd done.
Her hands dropped. She stepped back. Her face was on fire. Her hands were shaking. Her heart was going to explode.
"I—" she started.
She couldn't finish.
She turned. She ran.
---
Part Six: The Run
She didn't know where she was going.
She ran through the park, past the cotton candy stand, past the bumper cars, past the roller coaster they'd ridden four times. She ran until her lungs burned. She ran until she couldn't hear the music anymore. She ran until she found a bench behind the Ferris wheel, hidden by trees, hidden from everything.
She sat down. She put her head in her hands. She tried to breathe.
She kissed him.
She kissed him.
She kissed him.
She kissed him in front of everyone. In front of a stranger. In front of the whole park. She grabbed his collar and pulled him down and kissed him like she'd been wanting to do for fifteen years.
She didn't know she'd been wanting to do it for fifteen years.
She didn't know she'd been wanting to do it at all.
She kissed him.
And then she ran.
She was still sitting there, head in her hands, when she heard footsteps. Slow. Careful. Familiar.
He sat down beside her. Not touching. Just there.
They sat in silence for a long time.
"I didn't know I was going to do that," she said finally.
"I know."
"I saw her. She was looking at you. She wanted you. And I just—" She stopped.
"You just kissed me."
"I kissed you."
She looked at him. He was looking at the Ferris wheel. His face was calm. His hands were in his lap. He wasn't touching her.
"Why did you run?" he asked.
"Because—" She stopped. "Because I didn't know why I did it."
"Do you know now?"
She was quiet for a moment. "I was jealous."
He looked at her. "Jealous?"
"She was looking at you. She wanted you. And I—" She stopped. "I didn't like it."
"You didn't like someone looking at me?"
"I didn't like someone wanting you."
"Why?"
She looked at her hands. They were still shaking. "I don't know."
"You don't know."
"I don't know what I feel. I don't know what I want. I don't know anything except that I saw her touching your arm and I wanted to—" She stopped.
"You wanted to what?"
She looked at him. "I wanted to kiss you so she would know you're mine."
The words hung in the air.
She stared at him. He stared at her.
"I didn't mean—" she started.
"What did you mean?"
She shook her head. "I don't know."
"You don't know."
"I don't know what I meant. I don't know what I'm saying. I don't know what any of this is. I just— I saw her and I—" She looked at her hands. "I kissed you."
He was quiet for a long moment. Then: "Jay."
She looked at him.
"You kissed me."
"I kissed you."
"You grabbed my collar and kissed me in front of a stranger."
"I grabbed your collar and kissed you in front of a stranger."
"Then you ran."
"Then I ran."
He looked at her. "Why did you kiss me?"
She opened her mouth. Closed it. Opened it again.
"I don't know," she whispered.
"You don't know."
"I don't know. I don't know why I did it. I don't know what it meant. I don't know what I feel. I don't know anything."
He nodded slowly. "Okay."
"Okay?"
"Okay. You don't know. That's okay."
She stared at him. "It's okay?"
"It's okay to not know, Jay. It's okay to kiss someone and not know why. It's okay to feel something and not have a name for it."
She looked at him. "You're not angry?"
"Why would I be angry?"
"I kissed you. In front of everyone. Then I ran."
He smiled. It was soft. It was sad. It was everything. "I've been waiting for you to kiss me since I was fourteen years old. I'm not angry. I'm just—" He stopped.
"You're just what?"
He looked at her. "I'm just here."
She didn't know what to say. She didn't know what to feel. She just sat beside him, not touching, not talking, just being.
"Keifer?"
"Yeah?"
"What was that?"
"The kiss?"
"The whole thing. The girl. The jealousy. The—" She stopped. "What was that?"
He was quiet for a moment. "I think that was you, Jay. Feeling something you've been running from for a very long time."
She looked at her hands. "I don't know what I feel."
"That's okay."
"What if I never know?"
"Then you never know. That's okay too."
She looked at him. "How do you know so much?"
"I read the book."
She laughed. She couldn't help it. The laugh came out of nowhere, surprising her, surprising him.
"You're impossible," she said.
"You like it."
She looked at him. "I don't not like it."
He smiled. She smiled. They sat on the bench behind the Ferris wheel, not touching, not talking, just being.
"Jay?"
"Yeah?"
"We should go back. Everyone's waiting."
She looked toward the Ferris wheel. She could see her friends in the distance. Yuri waving his arms. Lyra looking for her. Alex standing beside her. Freya holding her camera.
"I kissed you," she said.
"You kissed me."
"And then I ran."
"You ran."
She stood up. He stood up. They stood there, looking at each other, not touching.
"I'm not going to do it again," she said.
"Do what?"
"Run."
He nodded. "Okay."
She picked up the shark from the ground. She'd dropped it when she ran. It was dusty. She brushed it off. She held it in her arms.
"I want to keep this," she said.
"It's yours."
She looked at him. "Thank you."
"You're welcome."
They walked back to their friends. Not touching. But not running.
---
Part Seven: The Return
Yuri saw them first. "THERE YOU ARE! WHERE DID YOU GO?"
Jay held up the shark. "I dropped this."
"You dropped a shark?"
"I won it. Then I dropped it."
"You won a shark?"
"Keifer won it. For me."
Yuri looked at the shark. Looked at Keifer. Looked at Jay. "Did you kiss?"
The group went silent.
Jay's face went red. "I—"
"She kissed me," Keifer said.
Yuri's eyes went wide. "She kissed you?"
"She kissed me."
"In front of the girl?"
"In front of the girl."
"Then she ran?"
"Then she ran."
Yuri stared at them. "Are you—"
"We're not anything," Jay said. "I just kissed him."
"You just kissed him?"
"I kissed him. That's all."
"That's all?"
"That's all."
Yuri looked at Keifer. Keifer shrugged. Yuri looked back at Jay. "You kissed him."
"I kissed him."
"And then you ran."
"I ran."
"And now you're back."
"I'm back."
Yuri opened his mouth. Closed it. Opened it again. "That's the most confusing thing I've ever heard."
"That's us," Keifer said.
Lyra walked over. Her eyes were red. "You kissed him?"
Jay nodded.
"Then you ran?"
Jay nodded.
Lyra looked at her for a long moment. Then she hugged her. "You kissed him."
Jay hugged her back. "I kissed him."
"Good."
They walked to the Ferris wheel. The sun was setting. The sky was pink and orange and gold.
---
Part Eight: The Ferris Wheel
They stood in line. Not touching. Close enough.
"Are you going to ride?" Keifer asked.
"I don't know."
"You don't have to."
She looked at the Ferris wheel. At the cars going up. At the people inside. At the way the sunset hit the metal.
"Are you going to ride?" she asked.
"If you want to."
She was quiet for a moment. Then: "I want to ride with Lyra."
He nodded. "Okay."
She looked at him. "Is that okay?"
"It's okay, Jay. You don't have to ride with me. You don't have to do anything. You kissed me. That's enough."
She didn't know what to say. She didn't know what to feel. She just stood there, holding her shark, watching the sunset.
"Keifer?"
"Yeah?"
"I'm glad I kissed you."
He looked at her. "I'm glad you kissed me too."
She smiled. He smiled. The line moved. She got on the Ferris wheel with Lyra. He got on with Alex.
The wheel turned. The park got smaller. The sky got bigger.
Lyra was quiet for a long time. Then: "You kissed him."
"I kissed him."
"Then you ran."
"I ran."
"Now you're here. With me. On the Ferris wheel."
Jay looked at her. "Is that weird?"
Lyra shook her head. "It's you."
They sat in silence for a moment. The wheel turned. The sun was setting. The world was gold.
"Jay?"
"Yeah?"
"What are you going to do now?"
Jay looked at the car below them. Keifer was sitting with Alex. He wasn't looking at her. He was looking at the sky. But she knew he knew she was there. She always knew.
"I don't know," she said. "I kissed him. That's all."
"That's all?"
"That's all."
Lyra looked at her. "That's enough."
Jay smiled. "That's enough."
---
Part Nine: The Night
They drove back to the house in silence.
Not the bad kind. The kind that happened when twelve people had been running all day and finally, finally learned to be still.
Jay sat by the window. Keifer sat beside her. Not touching. Close enough.
The shark was in her lap. She held it the whole way home.
When they got back to the house, everyone scattered. Yuri went to bed. Lyra went to the porch with Alex. Mica and Calix went to the kitchen. Care and Cole went to the library— arguing, probably. Freya and Erdix went to the garden. David went to his room with his chips.
Jay stood in the hallway.
Keifer walked past her. He stopped.
"Goodnight, Mariano."
"Goodnight, Watson."
He walked to his room. She walked to hers.
She lay in bed. The shark was beside her. Blue. Soft. Reminded her of Bruce. Reminded her of him.
She kissed him today.
She didn't know why.
She didn't know what it meant.
She didn't know what she felt.
But she kissed him.
And she didn't run.
---
Part Ten: The Night
Later, she heard him in the hallway. Footsteps. Soft. Quiet. He stopped outside her door.
"Jay?"
She got up. She opened the door.
He was standing there. His hair was messy. His shirt was wrinkled. His eyes were tired.
"You kissed me today," he said.
"I kissed you today."
"You grabbed my collar and kissed me in front of a stranger."
"I grabbed your collar and kissed you in front of a stranger."
"Then you ran."
"Then I ran."
He looked at her. "Are you going to run again?"
She looked at him. "I don't know."
He nodded slowly. "Okay."
"Keifer."
"Yeah?"
"I'm not—" She stopped. "I'm not ready."
"I know."
"I don't know what I feel."
"I know."
"I don't know what any of this means."
"I know."
She looked at him. "Why are you still here?"
He looked at her. "Because you kissed me."
She stared at him. "That's it?"
"That's it. You kissed me. You grabbed my collar and kissed me in front of a stranger. You kissed me like you've been wanting to kiss me for fifteen years. And I've been waiting for you to kiss me for fifteen years. So I'm here. I'm not going anywhere."
She didn't know what to say. She didn't know what to feel. She just stood in the doorway, looking at him, holding the shark.
"Goodnight, Keifer."
"Goodnight, Jay."
She closed the door. She lay in bed. The shark was beside her. His footsteps faded down the hall.
She kissed him today.
She didn't know why.
She didn't know what it meant.
But she kissed him.
And she didn't run.
That was enough.
For now, that was enough.
---
End of Chapter Fifteen