Saturday, November 22
Severus sighed down at the pitiful girl now resting in the large bed.
"You will contact me tonight?" Severus asked.
"Of course," Lupin agreed quietly. "Why don't you and Harry go back to the castle? Susan is perfectly safe here."
Severus didn't even have the energy to sneer at Lupin for such an asinine statement. In the last twenty-four hours, Amelia had been killed, Miss Bones had cut her arm open in a (thankfully) weak suicide attempt, Severus had to quickly meet with Pomona and Albus, and then he had to convince Miss Bones to spend a few days at Moon Lodge where Lupin could watch over her and eventually talk with her.
Lupin likely deserved a raise, but as Severus was not receiving one, neither would he.
And Severus was certain that Harry would be more difficult to deal with while Bones was gone than Bones herself would be.
Severus left after Lupin settled himself in a chair beside Bones' bed and went downstairs to find his child pacing the sitting room frantically.
"Harry, come along," Severus said, exhaustion crashing hard in his body. "Lupin will call us tonight with an update."
"I should stay here," Harry said, for the tenth time since Severus, Bones, and Pomona decided on this course of action. "I know Susan said she'd be fine here, but she really shouldn't be alone."
"She will not be alone," Severus reminded him. "Lupin is going to keep a close watch on her, and there are others here as well. The full moon is not for another 25 days, and your Susan will be back at the castle by then."
Severus may as well have been talking to the wall, for all that Harry seemed to hear him. He continued his pacing, his boots beginning to wear a trail in the carpet. Perhaps Lupin or one of the members of his ever-growing pack could memorialize it when Harry was gone:
'Proof of Harry Potter's Anxiety, 1996'
Severus felt a prick of grief sting the back of his eyes, but he'd occluded too often in the last few hours, so he simply blinked up at the ceiling until it passed.
"Harry, please." Harry paused his pacing at Severus' gently pleading tone. Severus finally caught his gaze and gestured to the floo. "Susan will be fine here. May we go?"
If Severus were not exhausted, if Amelia had not just died, if Amelia's niece was not upstairs accepting help for her overwhelming grief, it would nearly be comical to see Harry's head flip back and forth rapidly from Severus to the staircase.
"Lupin'll call us tonight?" Harry asked.
"He will."
Harry sent one last look at the staircase before rolling his shoulders and nodding curtly. "'Kay."
'Kay'.
Severus followed Harry through the floo, unsurprised that Harry led them directly to Severus' quarters where Harry immediately sunk down on his sofa and buried his hands in his hair.
Severus sat on the sofa beside him, slowly putting his arm over his shoulders. A comfort for them both, truly.
"She was going to leave me," Harry whispered. "She was going to join Amelia and leave me behind."
"No, Harry, I'm certain she was not attempting to leave you," Severus said quickly. He tightened his hold on Harry and pulled him closer to his side.
"No, you're right, I'm sure she just cut her arm open for fun." Harry's sneer was muffled slightly by his hands, but his cheek even in the face of exhaustion brought a small twitch of fondness to Severus' lips.
"Susan heard terrible news and reacted without thinking, just as you once had," Severus reminded him gently. "It was a shallow injury, and we both know that Susan could have cut her arm off with the strength of her right arm if she truly wanted to."
"Why do it then?" Harry picked his face up and stared blankly at the wall. "Why do it at all if she wasn't trying to die?"
Severus considered it carefully. He considered the half-mumbled apologies and explanation Bones made during their private discussion, the thoughts Pomona shared in his meeting with her and Albus. He considered how a teenage girl may be feeling after hearing that the largest portion of her last living relative that remained for identification and burial had been her brain.
And why Black and Shacklebolt had thought that would be a piece of information to share with a grieving child, Severus will never know.
"Susan was- is in terrible pain," Severus said carefully. "She was upset, distressed, and likely believed that the pain would end if she were to die, but did not actually want to die. Does that make sense?"
"No," Harry huffed and leaned back in his seat, half on Severus, half on the back of the sofa. "Either she wanted to live or she wanted to leave me."
"Or she wanted the pain to be gone and did not see a different path in the moment," Severus said gently. He reached out and tentatively brushed Harry's hair off his forehead. "It is difficult for people to see through their grief, but Susan must have known she could never truly leave you in such a way, or she would be gone."
"Well she's gone now, isn't she?" Harry said quietly. His voice was plaintive, childlike in a way he typically avoided. "And Lupin's the one who's going to fix her, again, because I'm fuckin worthless."
"You are no more worthless than I am," Severus assured him. "We all have our specialities, Harry. Lupin is merely the one with the type of patience and knowledge of coping with loss that you and I do not have."
Harry huffed again and seemed to settle more firmly in Severus' side. "What's your speciality?" he asked.
"Mine?" Severus looked over at the teenage boy peering up at him and attempted his best efforts at a smirk. "My speciality is potions, idiot child."
Harry didn't smile, but his face relaxed just slightly. "And mine?" he asked.
Severus' smirk felt more natural now. "Revenge, of course. When Miss Bones is ready to burn the world to ash on Amelia's behalf, you will be the expert."
Harry laughed quietly and stuck his hand out, silently summoning the quilt Severus once made the terrible mistake of allowing Nymphadora to use.
"Someone has to burn the world down," Harry said quietly as he tossed the blanket over the two of them. "I'm getting fuckin sick of funerals, aren't you?"
He was.
Severus believed that Harry's funeral would be the next one he attended, and instead it would be pushed back in favor of Amelia's.
"I am," Severus agreed, his voice rough with barely concealed emotion. "Are we sleeping on this lumpy sofa?"
Harry froze in the process of peeling off his boots. He did not look up, but Severus saw the crimson stain blooming on his cheeks.
Harry mumbled something as he quickly scooted away from Severus. Severus rolled his eyes and kicked his own boots to the floor.
"You will have to assist me in brewing a new bath of extra strength pain relievers tonight," Severus said calmly as he repositioned himself so he could lay against the arm of the sofa. Harry quickly laid on the opposite arm, and they subsequently began a juvenile kicking match to claim the most space for their almost equally long legs. Severus managed to win, then Harry immediately tossed his legs on top of Severus' crushing him to the sofa.
"Why extra strength?" Harry murmured.
"Because you and your misfits give me extra strong migraines," Severus said simply. He waved his wand, dimming the torches along the wall, and fixed the blanket. "Sleep, brat."
Harry blinked heavily at Severus across the sofa from him and nudged him lightly in the hip with his socked foot. "I'm not gonna wake up to you cutting your arm open, am I?"
Severus easily translated this to mean: 'don't leave me.'
"You are not," Severus assured him thickly. "I could not move if I tried, you are quite heavy."
Harry's lips curved upwards for a moment as he seemed to stare in Severus' eyes, searching for any tell that would cause him to believe Severus was lying to him.
"Wake me when Lupin calls," Harry eventually said before closing his eyes.
It didn't take long for Harry's breaths to become deep and even.
Severus watched him as he slept for longer than his own exhausted mind should have, but the weight of grief was heavy in his mind.
They would bury Amelia soon- what remained of her to be buried.
And, unless Severus gave up his only son, there would be countless other funerals to follow.
"I love you," Severus whispered roughly to his sleeping child. He tucked the blanket more firmly around Harry before laying back and closing his eyes.
When Severus woke, he was certain it was quite late. He sat up slightly, shaking his head at the patch of wet fabric beneath Harry's open mouth.
Harry's habit of drooling in his sleep was somehow both incredibly disgusting and endearing at the same time.
Severus glanced up at the clock and it took him a moment to understand that a quarter after two likely meant am considering they had not returned to the castle until after lunch. Which meant either the Wolf had not called, or Severus and Harry had slept through it. He carefully stretched his arm out to grab his wand off the table and looked at Harry sleeping relatively peacefully before casting his patronus.
He sent the little fox off with a curtly whispered, "How is she?" then settled back to await a response.
When the response came, it came quickly, though irritatingly loud enough to cause Harry to wake up with a jump.
"She woke up after you left and ate dinner then we talked for a while and she went back to sleep. Everything here is fine, I will update you if anything changes. Goodnight."
Harry blinked as the silver wolf dissipated. "He could have been a bit more specific."
"He could not have," Severus said, slowly extracting his legs from beneath Harry's. "Susan is allowed her privacy to choose what to share with you when she returns. It is not our right to know her every discussion and mood."
Harry scowled for a moment then dropped it quickly. "You think I could go see her?"
Severus sent a pointed look at the clock, where it was now nearly half past two.
"Probably not then," Harry sighed. He shuffled around and stretched out as Severus sat up. "You going somewhere?"
"I am going to shower and get some work done since I'm awake now," Severus told him. "You are quite welcome to go back to sleep."
Harry yawned and nuzzled the sofa arm. "Might do that," he said. "Wake me up in a few hours and we'll have breakfast."
"Certainly. Perhaps we will go ensure the Wolf did not eat Susan afterwards."
Harry's lips turned upwards for a moment. "Lupin's not as bad as I thought, even if I would personally rather shag noseless before I did him."
Severus was startled by that queer and factually spoken statement and huffed out a quiet laugh. "Disturbing, Harry," he said. "You are very disturbing."
"Ta," Harry murmured. "Night."
Severus shook his head at him once more before setting off to get a very early start to his day.
After a calming shower, and repairing any tears in his mental barriers that he brought on himself with his morbid thoughts, Severus settled down at the dining table with a cup of coffee and a stack of essays rife with misspellings from his first year students.
Severus had made it through two cups of coffee, an entire bottle of red ink, and a third of the essays when a silver cat patronus gracefully flew through his walls and settled itself in front of him.
"I believe I have something that belongs to you in the Hospital Wing," Minerva said through the cats mouth.
Severus stood and saw that Harry's messy head of black hair was still snoring softly on the sofa, Bones was at Moon Lodge, which left...
Theodore or Lovegood.
"Fuck," Severus swore quietly. He hastily scrawled a note to Harry and left it levitating by his head, in case he woke before he returned, and hastened out the door.
Severus moved quickly through the corridors, dropping his stoic persona in favor of hurrying to discover which child did what now. He thankfully passed no one, aside from the Bloody Baron who nodded to him. When he approached the Hospital Wing he took a steadying breath before opening the door and looking for either Theodore's brown hair or Lovegood's blonde.
What he found, was pink.
"Ah, Severus, so glad you could join us," Minerva called from Nymphadora's bedside. "Perhaps you can explain to Miss Tonks the dangers of apparation after drinking."
Severus stepped up quickly and sighed when he saw the freshly pink skin on Nymphadora's right calf.
"Fool," he scowled at Nymphadora who ignored him in favor of openly glowering at Minerva.
"I told you not to bother him," she told Minerva hotly. "It's Sunday."
"You didn't seem to mind bothering him when you apparated to our gates and left a blood trail behind you," Minerva said drily. "Severus, this is your problem. Good day."
Severus watched as Minerva stalked off to Poppy's office, undoubtedly to cluck over this new piece of gossip together over tea.
"Sorry, Sev." Nymphadora rolled down her trouser leg and covered the recent injury. "I had a bit too much to drink, thought I'd come see you, and forgot it was Sunday until someone sobered me right up."
"Someone sobered you, or the splinching sobered you?" Severus asked. He held his hand out politely to assist Nymphadora in standing.
"Little bit of both."
Severus looked her over as she pulled on his hand to stand and frowned at the obvious signs of distress. In the initial grief of losing Amelia, his panic over Susan, and his general state of exhaustion, he had forgotten that Nymphadora had been quite close to Amelia.
"Were you drinking alone?" Severus asked her.
"No," Nymphadora waved one hand with a forced air of ease. "A lot of us from the DMLE went out together. To... well..." she frowned and lifted one shoulder, "you know."
"Aah."
"Yeah." Nymphadora pulled her hand free and jammed both hands in her pockets. "Well, I should get going. I'll see you Friday? Or... or Wednesday, I guess. A-Amelia's services are on Wednesday morning."
Severus sighed and rolled his eyes at her. "Come eat breakfast. You should not be apparating on an empty stomach."
Nymphadora's shoulders tightened then slumped. "Sev, I'm fine," she smiled, though it appeared strained. "Go have breakfast with Harry, I've got a lot to get done today."
"You don't work Sundays," Severus reminded her. "Harry will forgive us this one intrusion."
"Or he'll kill me," Nymphadora muttered, but she followed along regardless.
Severus snuck a few subtle glanced at Nymphadora as they walked together in silence and frowned at what he saw.
"You look unwell," Severus said gently.
Nymphadora snorted, "And you have such a way with words."
There was a reason Severus called Lupin to handle Susan— Emotions were messy and Severus preferred to keep his messes in the potions lab.
He hesitated outside the entrance to his quarters. "If you want someone to talk to about it..."
Nymphadora gave Severus a small smile and placed her hand on his arm. "Thanks," she said genuinely. "I'll take you up on that sometime."
...he had been about to recommend Lupin.
Though that didn't seem to be how she took it.
Severus nodded and then slowly opened the door, letting out a breath of relief that Harry was still asleep.
"Aww, he looks a bit less terrifying in his sleep," Nymphadora said quietly with a playful grin.
Severus held back a scoff and waited for Nymphadora to follow him to the dining table before flicking his wand and casting a nonverbal muffliato to ensure they did not wake Harry.
Which, typically, is what woke the paranoid child.
Harry slowly stretched on the sofa, kicking his legs out like a ridiculous gangly fawn. He mumbled something in to the arm rest and sat up with a lazy stretch. "Sev? Oh. Tonks?"
"Wotcher, Harry," Nymphadora said with an expression that seemed torn between a smile and a grimace. "Sorry for intruding."
Harry blinked at Nymphadora.
He blinked at Severus.
Then Harry rolled his eyes.
"Think I can go see Sue?" he asked casually with a pointed look at the clock.
"Certainly, after you eat," Severus said. "She may still be sleeping."
"Where's Susan at?" Nymphadora asked, a bit curtly. "Is she not here?"
"None of your business," Harry snapped.
"Yes, my business," Nymphadora said, unfazed by Harry's tone. "Is she not in the castle?"
"She is with Remus Lupin for a few days," Severus said, intervening in what seemed to be a blossoming argument. "Resting away from the chaos of the castle."
"Oh," Nymphadora sighed and relaxed. "Gotcha."
Severus felt incredibly awkward as Harry narrowed his eyes at Nymphadora for a long moment.
"Mavis," Severus called, desperate to break the uncomfortable tension.
Mavis, thankfully, did not tardy as he popped in Severus' dining room. "Mister Snoops is, Oh!" Mavis blinked owlishly at Nymphadora before dipping his head in a bow. "Mister Snoops is having Miss Tonks over, without my Master Harry? On Sunday?"
Harry scoffed, drawing Mavis' eyes to him.
"Oh! Master Harry!" Mavis smiled then frowned and pulled on one of his ears nervously. "Mavis is hearing about Misses Susan's aunt, can Mavis be sending Miss Susan her pumpkin pasties?"
"That'd be brill," Harry said warmly. "Can you send them to Moon Lodge?"
"Of course," Mavis bowed with a wide smile once more. "Shall Mavis be bringing breakfast for you's?"
Harry's eyes flicked to Nymphadora quickly before Severus saw his jaw clench and unclench. "Yeah, if you don't mind, for three of us?"
Severus felt a bit of pride unfurling. Harry truly had matured past his pettier behaviors- to an extent. At a minimum, he seemed willing to share breakfast with Nymphadora on a Sunday.
Mavis popped away with a quick agreement and Harry warily moved towards the table.
"Well, this is awkward," Nymphadora said brightly as the three of them sat in silence for the longest two minutes of Severus' life.
"A bit," Harry agreed with a faint grin. "Why are you here, anyway?"
"I got pissed at the pub with some of the others from the DMLE and thought I'd come irritate Sev," Nymphadora said shamelessly. "I splinched the hell out of my leg and Poppy had to patch me up."
"Why were you coming to irritate Sev?"
"He's fun to irritate," Nymphadora shrugged.
"Have you given him a migraine yet?" Harry smirked as the food popped up on the table.
"Does he have migraines?" Nymphadora asked curiously.
Severus scowled and sat back as he was clearly not included in their discussion.
"Loads of them," Harry grinned. "Cissa swears he's going prematurely grey too. I suppose you aren't irritating him properly if you haven't given him a migraine, have you?"
"Teach me your ways, oh wise one," Nymphadora laughed.
"Or hurry up and eat and go see your Susan," Severus said.
Harry frowned and began eating with a speed that was both unbecoming and disgusting.
"Don't choke," Nymphadora told him before turning to Severus. "Albus said he's canceling classes on Wednesday since Amelia is... was such an important witch."
"As he should," Severus said truthfully. "I know at least nearly a dozen students who wish to attend."
"The Ministry is covering everything," Nymphadora told him. "There's supposed to be a big thing in the paper tomorrow I think."
Severus nodded, unsure how he was meant to respond. "Will Shacklebolt be taking her spot within the DMLE?"
Severus did not have to look up to feel Harry's scowl at the mention of the auror. Shacklebolt and Harry had seemed to have built a terrible rapport between them. Likely due to Shacklebolt's insistence that Harry was a killer and Harry's natural distrust of anyone who works with Albus.
It was understandable on both ends.
"No," Nymphadora scrunched her nose and stabbed especially hard at an egg with her fork. "Pius Thicknesse."
Severus struggled to place the name. "Is he a tolerable replacement?"
"Not at all," Nymphadora said bluntly. "He's a pureblood, he's spouted off some nasty rhetoric before."
"Fuck him then," Harry sneered. "I'm done, I'm going to Moon Lodge, I'll be back later."
"Be back by dinner, please," Severus told him as Harry jumped to his feet. "I would prefer not to explain to Albus why my floo was activated past curfew."
"'Kay." Harry gave Severus and Nymphadora a two fingered salute then practically sprinted to the floo.
"I reckon he didn't want his trainers then?" Nymphadora asked after Harry spun away to Moon Lodge dressed in the same clothes he has had on since Friday night and his socks.
"Apparently not," Severus said, relatively unconcerned with Harry's footwear. He placed his fork down and folded his hands on the table. "You and Amelia were close, how are you?"
"Miserable," Nymphadora said baldly. "How are you?"
Severus was taken aback by her question and answered a bit too truthfully. "Surprised and rather unhappy, I suppose."
Nymphadora sighed heavily. "It was surprising," she said softly. "But Amelia died a hero, she saved a lot of lives and took down three death eaters in one go."
"And left behind her niece," Severus added.
"Why is Susan at Moon Lodge?" Nymphadora asked. "If she's with Remus then she can't be doing that great, can she?"
"She is not," Severus said carefully. He wanted to appease Nymphadora's nerves about Susan's placement, but did not want to divulge the privacy Susan deserved. "I am hopeful that Lupin may have more success in assisting her in working her grief out in a healthy manner."
Nymphadora seemed to weigh his words for a moment. "That makes it sound like she's doing badly, very badly."
Severus inclined his head, silently agreeing.
Abruptly, Nymphadora jumped to her feet, tripping slightly over her chair leg as she shoved it to the table. "Thanks for breakfast, Sev," she said. "I need to go, I've got something to take care of."
Severus was once more caught off guard by the witch. "Do you need assistance?"
"No," Nymphadora gave him a lopsided grin, "Thanks though. I'll see you Wednesday."
Severus hardly blinked twice before Nymphadora too floo'd away, headed to the Ministry.
On a Sunday.
When she was off work.
Severus shook off his bemusement at Nymphadora's abrupt departure, and cleared the table manually, using the menial task to clear his mind. Amelia's death, while crushing to lose such a remarkable witch from the world, was unsurprising. The Dark Lord worked towards similar aims at the beginning of the last war, the more ministry officials he could take out, the more he could replace with others who would be more willing to follow his lead.
Amelia would have never followed the Dark Lord, and thus, she had fallen.
The Minister of Magic would be next, Severus was certain.
Unless it's Harry.
Unless it is Harry.
And, as Severus had essays to grade, teenage girls mental health to worry over, recently orphaned teenage girls to worry over, and his own teenaged child to worry about his mental health—
He would rather not consider the likelihood of Harry outliving Cornelius Fudge at the moment.
Severus worked quickly to grade the remainder of the essays he had to complete, keeping an eye on the clock as he worked. Once he completed his duties as a professor, he hesitated for a moment with his quill above a fresh piece of parchment.
Should he? Should he not?
It is better to at least ask now, then speak to Harry and Susan, he decided.
Ministry of Magic,
Dept. of Child Welfare:
I am uncertain if Miss Amelia Bones left a will regarding the living arrangements for her niece, Susan Bones. However, if not, I would appreciate you considering myself for placement as I am the current legal guardian of Susan's close friend and distant cousin, Harry Potter.
Please contact me at Hogwarts if this would be an option for Miss Susan Bones.
-Severus T. Snape
Severus had no more than rolled the parchment and sealed it, before his floo flared to life at nearly five o'clock.
"'M back," Harry called dully before sprawling on the sofa.
Clearly, his visit had gone well.
Severus moved slowly to the sitting room and chose a chair across from Harry, hoping to prompt him in to talking.
"How is Susan?" Severus asked evenly.
"Sad. Miserable. Pissed."
"Pissed?" Severus repeated. "At you?"
"Yup."
Severus breathed slowly, counting to ten as he did.
It had been remiss of him to send Harry to visit Miss Bones alone, apparently. Harry, while maturing and empathizing in ways Severus once believed him to be incapable of, still had a terrible bedside manner.
"Why is Susan angry with you?"
Harry chewed on his lip as he blinked up at the ceiling. Severus waited patiently, as he oftentimes had to do to give Harry time to organize his thoughts.
"This," Harry said. He held his arms up, flashing the bare forearms covered in scars.
It took Severus a moment to understand his line of thought.
"You... you discussed your past history with Susan?" Severus worked hard to keep the shock from his voice. That would be a nearly unprecedented first for Harry, to willingly expose a part of his own vulnerable history in a show of actual true empathy.
Harry would choose now to grow and mature in leaps and bounds. He would begin to show the man he should someday become when Severus knew it was a man he would be unable to truly grow in to.
Severus summoned a bottle of bourbon as his thoughts steadily spiraled.
"Can I have a drink?" Harry asked, rolling his head to the side and watching Severus pour himself a healthy measure.
Why not?
"Why not?" Severus murmured. He summoned another tumbler and filled it partly full for Harry. "Tell me about your conversation with Susan and you may have one glass if you agree to stay here tonight."
"Deal." Harry summoned the glass straight from Severus' hand and threw it back with more ease than a teenage boy should have. "I told Susan she wasn't allowed to fuckin leave me, didn't I? And she said I didn't understand, and I bloody well do, don't I? So I told her that. And then she had the fuckin audacity to get pissed at me! Said 'how dare I try leaving her', as if she didn't do the same damn thing!"
That... was quite hypocritical of the girl. Although, in her defense, her aunt had just died and she clearly did not have a good handle of her emotions.
"So you fought," Severus said.
"We had a bit of a row, then fuckin Lupin came running in, and I changed my mind, he's a prat, isn't he? And so then Lupin had the fuckin audacity to turn our row in to a 'counseling session'. Don't you dare pay him for it, Sev," Harry sat up and pointed threateningly at Severus. "I told him to piss off, but Susan," Harry sneered her name for the first time in Severus' memory, "decided we were going to 'talk about it'."
Severus raised an interested brow, "And did you?"
"I'm supposed to tell Sue no when Amelia just died?" Harry scoffed. "She's a manipulative twit."
Susan may be manipulative, but Severus found himself feeling quite fond towards the girl who quite literally twisted Harry's arm in to discussing his own suicide attempt.
"How did that go?" Severus asked neutrally.
"Susan cried," Harry scowled. "I think Lupin was going to cry too, so I told Susan I'd pop by tomorrow and left before he did. I'll deal with Susan crying, I'm not gonna see bloody Lupin do it, am I? It makes me itch Sev."
"Understandable," Severus smirked. He levitated the bottle of bourbon to Harry and had it tap on his glass until Harry quickly held his glass up and accepted the small measure Severus gave him.
"Cheers, Sev," Harry said, raising his glass. "At least someone understands me."
"Which says quite a bit about my own descent in to madness," Severus smirked, raising his cup.
***
Harry began a queer routine over the next couple of days. On Monday and Tuesday, he ate breakfast with Severus in his quarters, then dashed off to his absurdly short morning classes. He ate lunch in the Great Hall with his misfits, then floo'd to Moon Lodge to attend 'platonics couples counseling' (as Harry so eloquently called it) and discussed suicide, grief, and depression with Lupin and Bones.
He floo'd back to Severus' quarters in time for dinner, which he ate in the dining room while complaining loudly about Lupin and Bones both.
"Susan's a hypocrite!" Harry howled Monday night. "'You didn't tell me!' Oh, what? She jumped up to tell me?! Before I was supposed to find her dead body in the fuckin loo? I was sleeping in alleys, wasn't I? She doesn't have a real good excuse."
Severus hummed in neither agreement, nor disagreement.
They were both monsters, truly.
Severus adored them.
Tuesday night, Harry complained about Lupin as he stabbed aggressively at his potatoes. "He wants me to talk about sex with Fred, suicide with Sue, what's next Sev? My dead parents with you?"
"We could," Severus offered calmly.
"You're a dick," Harry sneered.
Harry also slept in Severus' quarters Sunday, Monday, and Tuesday night. Severus frowned when he realized what a restless sleeper Harry was, and when he heard him crying out his mother's name in his sleep again.
It was pitiful.
'She would hate me.'
And nothing Severus said could convince the child otherwise, so Severus began working on a new form of dreamless sleep. Harry could hardly take it every night, as it was both addictive and created a terribly physical dependency on it over time, but he began working on a new formula in the hours he had free.
Until Wednesday.
Wednesday was as truly terrible as Severus suspected it would be.
"No," Severus told Harry at breakfast.
"No what?" Harry murmured, his eyes flicking to the liquor cabinet.
"You will not sully Amelia's memory by attending her services inebriated," Severus said firmly.
"Sirius is," Harry said sullenly.
"I will kill him if so," Severus swore.
Harry blinked at him, "You'd sully Amelia's memory by committing murder at her funeral?"
"Fuck off, Harry," Severus sighed.
Harry smirked, but it lasted only until they were dressed in their dress robes and waited on the rest of his misfits to join them. Albus, true to his word, had cancelled classes for the day and arranged for any student who wanted to attend to be transported to and from the funeral.
Severus was unsurprised that the majority of Hufflepuff house went. He was rather shocked that the entirety of Slytherin, aside from two exceptions, also went.
Apparently, the right hand of the 'Heir of Slytherin' and burgeoning war general, earned a show of support from the Slytherin students.
It truly was heartening to witness such an unprecedented showing from the house Severus led with such pride.
"I hate funerals," Harry complained as they waited for the others. He pulled on the collar of his dress shirt and looked horribly uncomfortable. "Everyone cries."
"That is the natural reaction to a sad event," Severus said. He was not unsympathetic, he too disliked funerals. "If you do not know what to say, it is best to remain quiet."
Harry gave him a juvenile roll of his eyes and an annoyed 'I'm not an idiot' sort of look.
This was how Severus wanted to remember Harry.
One day, when it was Harry's funeral Severus would be attending, this is how Severus will remember him. Irritable and cheeky and himself.
For as long as Harry's funeral lasted anyway, because Severus would follow him after ensuring his child was buried with all the accolades the chaotic demon deserved.
They made a solemn group as they floo'd to the Ministry together. Harry's friends were dressed nicely and were as pale faced and teary eyed as the other mourners were in the atrium.
Severus watched as Susan flew straight from the floo to Harry's arms. He also watched with a sense of bitter pride as Harry remained by Susan's side throughout the entirety of the service, despite Frederick's attendance, and despite Harry's blatant discomfort at the many, many, mourners who approached Susan and sobbed over the pair of them.
"They look like adults," Black said morosely as he stood with Severus, Lupin, and Nymphadora and watched Susan gracefully accept well-wishers with a brave face and Harry on her arm.
"It's not fair, they have to grow up so quickly," Nymphadora said. Her hair, which seemed to reflect her emotions at times, was a dark brown and pulled back in a sensible bun.
Severus sorely missed the pink bob she typically wore.
"We'll finish this war then and hope their kids don't have to," Lupin said with an air of optimism that stabbed Severus in the heart.
If they finished this war, Harry would never grow to have kids.
If they allowed Harry to grow to adulthood, this war would never be finished.
"No matter what happens, I lose him," Severus breathed in Nymphadora's ear as they took their seat. "Either this is the first of hundreds of funerals, or—"
"Or the next one is Harry's." Nymphadora grabbed Severus' hand and squeezed it tightly. "We can't let that happen. Look at him, look how far he's come. It wouldn't be fair."
Life rarely was.
Severus listened as many officials, including the Minister himself, spoke about Amelia that day.
They spoke of her passion for justice.
Her love of her niece.
Her bravery.
Her loyalty.
Her spirit and her joy.
Her wit and her intelligence.
"Amelia was one of the greatest witches I have ever had the pleasure of knowing," Kingsley Shacklebolt said to a crowd of over three hundred attendants. "I believe she is watching us now, watching to see what choices we make in her memory. And I choose to act with as much spirit, integrity, and bravery as Amelia Bones did." Shacklebolt raised his wand, and lit the tip with a lumos as the atrium lights were dimmed, "To Amelia!"
"To Amelia!" the crowd cried with their own lit wands.
Severus was glad for the dark. For only in the dark could he allow a single tear to fall in memory of one of his truest friends. A single tear in remembrance of one of the kindest witches he had ever known, and a single tear as he considered whose funeral he would attending next.
"To Amelia," he whispered.