"Everyone! Look! This goddess has brought back salvation!"
Aqua came running over, drenched in sweat, tightly dragging along a caravan leader who looked like he was about to be strangled.
She slapped a gaudy flyer onto the Adventurers Guild table, her face glowing with the ecstatic joy of someone who had finally proven she was not useless.
"Listen up! Thanks to this goddess's wisdom, radiant as the stars, and my unparalleled negotiation skills, I've made contact with a large merchant caravan heading for Arcanletia!" Aqua planted her hands on her hips, her chest rising and falling with her heavy breathing. "They just happen to be short on high-level Adventurer escorts! As long as we agree to escort them through that monster-infested wilderness, not only do we avoid paying those ridiculous carriage fees, we'll even receive a generous quest reward when we arrive! Well?! Praise me! Worship me! Hurry up and say I'm the smartest Goddess in Axel!"
Kōichi and Kazuma Satou exchanged a look, their expressions slowly shifting from suspicion to shock.
"...Hey, Kōichi, I heard that right, didn't I?" Kazuma rubbed his ears and lowered his voice. "Is this really the same dim-witted Goddess who only knows how to blow money on sparkling wine and party tricks? We save the carriage fare and get paid on top of it? This is a textbook-perfect move!"
Kōichi also looked stunned. Watching Aqua stand there smugly waiting to be praised, he felt for the first time that her blue sacred halo really did seem a little brighter.
"Aqua... did you cash in next month's IQ allowance early? This really was the smartest decision! With that money, we can stay in the most luxurious presidential suite with a mixed-gender bath once we reach the Hot Spring Capital!"
"Hehehe! No travel fees, and we get paid too. Long live Aqua-sama!" Kazuma jumped up in excitement, completely forgetting his earlier worries about Yunyun.
"In that case, let's get moving!" Kōichi made the call. "Wiz has already gone back to pack. We'll head to the caravan meeting point now! As for Yunyun... since she went off with Dust to hunt toads, we'll just pick her up when the caravan passes that meadow!"
"Ooooh! Let's go! Destination: the City of Water and mixed-gender bathing paradise!"
Amid Kōichi and Kazuma's cheers, this strange party, made up of a Goddess, a Lich, a delusional Arch Wizard, a masochistic Knight, and two sadistic men, finally began its journey toward Arcanletia.
Of course, they had no idea that what awaited them on the road, besides hot springs, was the Axis Order's enthusiasm, burning hotter than molten lava.
The carriage rolled slowly out of the city and across the lush grasslands on the outskirts of Axel. The air was filled with the smell of fresh grass and... the fishy stench of some sticky creature.
Sure enough, in a nearby hollow, two familiar figures were caught in an extremely traditional, grueling battle.
Several giant toads let out deep croaks, while Yunyun, dressed in Crimson Demon Clan robes, flushed bright red and frantically chanted Intermediate Magic, trying to repel the monsters drooling over her curvy figure... no, drooling over her value as food.
Not far behind her, the blond thug Dust listlessly swung a rented longsword that looked ready to snap at any moment while shouting, "Hey! Yunyun! Hurry up and use that magic that goes boom! My sword's edge is about to chip, and I'll have to pay for that!"
"Stop the carriage!"
Kōichi and Kazuma Satou leaned out of the carriage window almost at the same time and shouted in perfect unison.
The caravan stopped. Kōichi jumped down from the carriage and strode toward the muddy battlefield like the very embodiment of justice.
He casually picked up a stone and threw it at the toad trying to sneak up behind Yunyun, then flashed an extremely brilliant and tempting smile.
"Yo, Yunyun! What's the point of fighting toads in a place like this with some unreliable thug? Look, we're going on a trip to Arcanletia! It has top-class hot springs and an artistic atmosphere that cleanses the soul. Since you just happen to be alone right now, ignoring Dust, why not come with us?"
"Huh? Huhhh?!" Yunyun was so startled by the sudden invitation that she nearly broke off her chant. Her large purple eyes instantly filled with tears of emotion. "K-Kōichi-san... are you inviting me? Not to use me as a meat shield, and not to make me pay the carriage fare, but really inviting me to travel with you? Uuu... I-I'd love to! Please, take me with you!"
"Hey! You two bastards, are you pretending I don't exist?!" Dust stormed over, wiping mud from his face as he pointed at Kōichi and Kazuma's noses and cursed. "I brought her out here for a quest! You're stealing my party member in broad daylight! And Arcanletia? Aside from the crazy cultists, the only good thing about that place is..."
Just then, Kazuma Satou leaned close to his ear and spoke in a low voice that only men could understand.
"Dust, listen carefully. The inns there... have mixed-gender baths. And our party this time has Wiz, Yunyun, Darkness... you get it, right?"
Dust's expression froze instantly. In one-tenth of a second, the anger in his eyes transformed into saintlike devotion.
"...Mixed-gender baths?" Dust swallowed hard, then slapped Kōichi on the shoulder and roared with righteous conviction. "As Yunyun's temporary captain in name, how could I possibly feel at ease letting her go alone with suspicious guys like you to such a dangerous place?! To protect Yunyun's chastity... no, to protect my comrade's safety, I, Dust, must join this expedition as well!"
"Who said you could join?! You just want to freeload on the carriage!" Kazuma shoved him away in disgust, but then broke into a wicked grin. "Still, having one more pack mule around wouldn't hurt. Kōichi, what do you think?"
Kōichi looked at their ever-growing party, where the proportion of scumbags continued to rise, and smiled like a devil.
"No problem. The more, the merrier. Dust, you can get on the carriage if you want, but if we run into monsters on the road, you charge in first. Otherwise, I'll make a thousand copies of your tab from the Succubus Inn and scatter them across every street in Arcanletia!"
"You win! Deal!" Dust agreed through gritted teeth.
And so, with Yunyun sobbing as if deeply moved and Aqua shouting from the roof that they should stop adding more freeloaders, the chaos-filled carriage finally officially began its journey to the City of Water.