As Wiz's final frost spell swept the merchant road clean, the battlefield, which had been noisy and brimming with wild energy moments ago, finally fell silent.
The fierce-looking group of female Orcs had witnessed the magical power of an Arch Lich and a Crimson Demon Clan prodigy, and finally realized that while these three males might be delicious, the females guarding them were far too vicious. All they could do was spit a few curses like, "Pah! Stingy women! May none of you ever find a man!" before disappearing into the depths of the forest.
Even so, although the battle was over, the mood on the merchant road was even heavier than before.
Kazuma Satou lay spread-eagled in the mud, his signature green cloak reduced to a few strips of cloth hanging from his waist.
He stared blankly up at the sky, his pupils unfocused, while his mouth mechanically chewed on the half-eaten wild fruit he had yet to swallow. A faint, almost transparent wisp of his soul was slowly drifting out from the corner of his mouth.
"...White... I can see it... Goddess Eris is waving to me from the other side of the river..." Kazuma murmured as if talking in his sleep. "No pain... no debts... no moronic Goddess, and no Orcs... That must be heaven..."
Not far from him, Dust, who had once boasted of being one of Axel's strongest warriors, was curled into a ball, clutching his knees tightly as his whole body shook like a leaf.
"Don't come near me... Don't lick my ears... I'm not a little piglet... I'm a noble Dragon Knight... I'm a dragon... a dragon pig... Waaaaahhh!!"
Dust suddenly let out a broken, dry sob and buried his head deep between his legs. It was clear he had completely lost every scrap of dignity and spirit he had as a human man.
"W-Wiz, hurry and use healing magic on them! Their bodies don't seem badly hurt, but I think their minds are completely broken!"
Yunyun stood helplessly between the two wrecks, so panicked she was almost in tears.
"I-I'll do it right away!" Wiz hurriedly cast a spell, and pale green light enveloped their bodies. But aside from making the bruises vanish, it did nothing. Their eyes remained as dead as two dried-up wells.
"It's useless, Wiz." Megumin walked over and nudged Kazuma's waist with her toe in disgust. "With psychological trauma this severe, they probably won't be able to look at any pork products for the rest of their lives unless we erase all their memories. Honestly, to think my teammates could be reduced to this state by a few Orcs. What a disgrace to the Crimson Demon Clan."
"...Sob... That's so mean..."
Just then, a wail full of grievance and anger came from the bushes in the distance.
Aqua stumbled back out a moment later, her hair full of leaves and a huge, clear handprint still stamped across her face, wiping away her tears as she walked.
"Kōichi!! You sadist! You scumbag! You actually used this Goddess as a shield!! My face! My peerless, beautiful face was almost smashed to pieces by that stinking pig-headed man!! Waaaaahhh!! And where's my wine?! Where's my bottle of sparkling wine worth 100,000 Eris?!"
The moment Aqua returned, she charged straight at Kōichi, trying to deliver divine punishment with her soft little fists. But as soon as she saw the bottle in Kōichi's hand, still completely unharmed, her sobbing stopped at once, and she put on an extremely practical, ingratiating smile.
"Hehe, Kōichi, I knew you were a good person. You protected this bottle for me, right? Give it here. I need alcohol to numb my wounded heart..."
"You want the wine? Sure." Kōichi gave her a wicked smile that sent a chill down Aqua's spine. He pointed at the two useless wrecks lying on the ground. "If you can get those two back on their feet right now, I'll give it back. Otherwise, I'll pour it over Kazuma's head right in front of you and help cleanse his soul."
"D-Damn it! How dare you threaten a deity!" Aqua gritted her teeth, then turned to Kazuma and Dust on the ground with a look of disgust. "Hey, you two! Stop playing dead! So what if you got kissed a few times and fed a few mouthfuls of milk? This Goddess got sent flying hundreds of meters and I'm not talking about retiring! Get up and drive the cart already! Otherwise, I'll paint a mural of the way you two were molested and stick it on Axel's guild bulletin board!!"
The instant he heard the words "mural" and "bulletin board," Kazuma's soul, which had already drifted halfway out, gave a violent shudder and forced itself back into his body.
"...Aqua... you... demon..." Kazuma trembled as he propped himself up. His eyes were still filled with shadows, but at least a faint will to live had returned. "If something like that gets posted... I'd rather just die right now..."