Till now, Anshika had always believed that Om tried to end his life only because she had rejected him and said those harsh words that day, and that belief had haunted her for years, leaving behind a constant restlessness and strange nightmares that never really let her sleep in peace, but today, hearing Om say otherwise shook her completely, and along with the shock, a wave of anger rose inside her too because for something that wasn't even entirely her fault, she had endured endless taunts from her friends and classmates, people calling her names, blaming her, pushing her to a point where she had no choice but to leave that school altogether, yet even after that, the nightmares never stopped—every night she was dragged back into those memories, reliving his death, hearing those voices again, again and again… and now he was saying she wasn't the only reason.
"If not me… then what was the reason, Om?"
Anshika asked again, this time her voice slightly raised.
"It shouldn't matter to you, Anshika, but just remember this—you were not the only reason I tried to take my life."
Om replied calmly, looking straight at her.
"You'll have to tell me, Om… what was that reason that made you try to kill yourself and then disappear like that, never showing your face to anyone again?"
Anshika said, pressing him this time.
"But why? And why should I tell you?"
Om asked, his tone turning serious.
"Because that one attempt of yours changed my entire life. After you disappeared, people wouldn't stop taunting me—'Look, there goes the murderer,' 'selfish girl,' 'heartless,' 'the one who plays with love'—I heard everything. If I hadn't changed my school, I might have fallen into depression and… maybe I would have done something terrible too, but I wasn't that weak. The taunts stayed behind with the school, but your death… your death followed me. Every night I see those dreams, I can't even sleep properly, and now that you're saying I wasn't the real reason, I deserve to know the truth… at least so I can clear this stain from my name. So please… tell me what the real reason was."
Her voice trembled, anger and emotion mixing together.
Om fell silent for a moment. He hadn't expected this. He could see it now—his death had left a deep scar on her life too. But still, something about her hadn't changed… somewhere, she was still thinking about herself first.
"Clear your name, huh…" Om let out a faint laugh. "Listen, Anshika… you were never the only reason behind what I did, but yes… you were one of the important ones. I agree, whatever you went through after that was too much for you, but the truth is… you deserved it too."
Anshika froze.
"I was already broken back then. I had already lost to life. After my parents' mysterious death, I was barely holding myself together. You have no idea what it's like to grow up without parents… and still, I tried to live with the values they gave me. But happiness? It never really existed in my life. Then one day… I saw you. And without even realizing it, I gave my heart to you. But after watching you for a few days, I understood—we were nothing alike. So I buried those feelings."
He paused for a second.
"And then… you came to me that day, shook my hand, called me your friend. For the first time, I felt something change. I started feeling… happy. I didn't know your intentions. I didn't think that far. I just believed you were a good person. I thought maybe… my life was finally getting some color."
Anshika couldn't move. She just listened.
"But the day I proposed to you… if you had simply said no, it wouldn't have mattered. But the things you said that day… they reopened every wound I had ever tried to heal. And in that moment, I gave up completely. I accepted that maybe a happy life was never meant for me. And before I even realized it… my feet had already started running toward the sea."
His voice stayed calm… but it carried something heavy.
"When I jumped off that cliff, I didn't even think if I was right or wrong. I just… jumped. I knew how to swim, but I didn't even try to save myself."
Anshika's eyes widened. She had never imagined the depth of what he had gone through. For the first time, she truly understood—her "joke" that day hadn't just hurt him… it had pushed him over the edge.
The Om standing in front of her now… wasn't the same one.
That boy had really died that day.
"What did you feel… when you were dying? Did it bring you peace?"
She asked softly, tears filling her eyes.
"Yes… when I was sinking, I looked up once… toward the surface, and for a moment, it felt like my mom and dad were there… waiting for me. I closed my eyes… ready to embrace death. And strangely… there was a kind of peace in that water."
Om answered quietly.
Anshika couldn't hold back anymore.
"I'm sorry… maybe I wasn't the only reason, but I was still one of them. I was immature back then… I didn't understand anything. I just did whatever felt fun to me, without thinking. I was raised with too much comfort, too much pampering… I never learned how to understand someone else's pain. But your death… it shook me completely. After that, I never even made friends with any boy again. Still… I regret everything I did. If you can… please forgive me. I know I don't deserve it. And… thank you… for not letting me fall in my Baba's eyes today."
She stood there, tears rolling down her face.
Om looked at her quietly.
"It's okay… I've already moved on from all that. And as for your nightmares and those thoughts… we'll find a way to deal with them too. From here on… it's a new beginning for both of us. Just make sure you don't repeat your past mistakes anywhere again. Take care."
With that, Om turned and walked away.
His eyes… were slightly wet too.
Anshika stood there, unmoving, tears still in her eyes, watching him leave.
And in that moment, something inside her shifted.
For the first time… she truly felt the weight of the life Om had lived all these years.