In Darkness's eyes, the dim lights of the guild hall now looked like sacred spotlights.
Her usually gallant eyes were already clouded over, and her hands were clasped so tightly that her knuckles had begun to whiten.
"S-so it's finally my turn..." Darkness's breathing grew utterly ragged, her chest rising and falling violently. There was even a faint, suppressed moan slipping from deep in her throat. "To have two men... and men with such filthy looks in their eyes at that... compete this shamelessly for the right to control me... ngh! C-could this be the legendary public execution?!"
Seeing that, Kazuma immediately brought out his signature move as a scumbag.
He strode up to Darkness and flashed an extraordinarily vicious, icy smile, his gaze of utter contempt reaching its full potential.
"Darkness! Listen up!" Kazuma slashed a hand through the air, his tone full of unreasonable, overbearing force. "If I become captain, I will never treat you like a Knight! I'll treat you like a walking human shield, no, a lump of living bait! From now on, every time we run into monsters, I'll kick you out first to draw all the fire while I sit safely in the back and sip tea! And that's not all. I'll dump every filthy, exhausting chore on you. I'll make you clean the guild toilets, and I'll make you stand in line to buy me limited-edition porn magazines! I'll burn through every last bit of your savings and reduce you, a Crusader, to scavenging in the streets for scraps! Well? A life with your dignity completely trampled underfoot. Only I can give you that!"
"Uwooooooh!! I-It's amazing!!" Darkness let out a shriek, swaying on the spot as a dangerously deep flush spread across her face. "To be treated like a tool... to have my fortune squandered... such a hopeless life... it's too, too wonderful! Kazuma! You really do understand me!!"
Watching Darkness look like she might ascend on the spot, Kōichi's lips curved slightly upward.
Kazuma's level of sadism was still far too amateurish in front of someone like him, a man with modern thinking and a deep understanding of deviant psychology.
Kōichi slowly walked up to Darkness. Unlike Kazuma, he did not raise his voice. Instead, he reached out with that hand, still a little rough from the earlier battle, and lightly caught Darkness by the chin, forcing her to lift her head and meet his cold, controlling gaze.
"Darkness, do you really think what Kazuma said... was interesting?" Kōichi's voice was low and magnetic, carrying a pressure that sent a chill down the spine. "That was just a child's prank. If you choose me as captain, I'll give you a deeper kind of despair, one so complete it'll leave you begging for life and death alike."
Darkness's pupils contracted sharply, and her body gave an involuntary shudder.
"I'll make you stand in front of every adventurer in this guild wearing that broken armor I charred black with electricity, so ruined it's exposing whole patches of skin, and deliver a self-criticism speech for three straight hours. I'll order you not to use any defensive skills in battle, and force you to attack with that accuracy of yours that's practically zero, while you watch your companions fall into danger one after another right in front of you, with nothing you can do but cry out helplessly."
Kōichi leaned close to her ear. His warm breath brushed against her neck, but his voice was cold as ice.
"And most importantly... every time you crave punishment, every time you long for me to berate or humiliate you, I'll look at you with the gentlest, most upright expression and say, 'It's okay. You've already done well enough.' Then I'll ignore every single one of your twisted requests. I'll leave you hanging off to the side and drive you mad with unfulfilled longing. That kind of total emotional isolation, that absolute denial of everything you desire... can you handle it?"
"Ah... ahhh...!!!"
As if struck by lightning, Darkness's legs gave out and she collapsed straight to the floor.
She panted in huge ragged breaths, her eyes overflowing with a joy and terror unlike anything she had ever felt before.
"Emotional... isolation... denial of desire... K-Kōichi... y-you devil! You true, hopeless, most sadistic Wizard in all of Axel!! This kind of torment, wanting something forever and never getting it... uwooooooh!! I choose you! I choose you! Even if you toy with me until I break, I'll still choose you!!"
Kazuma was completely dumbfounded.
He stared blankly at Darkness, now kneeling at Kōichi's feet as if she were actually considering whether to kiss the tip of his shoe, and the short sword in his hand hit the floor with a clatter.
"I lost... I actually lost to this guy in terms of perversion..." Kazuma dropped to his knees beside Aqua, utterly hollowed out and sinking into deep self-doubt. "I thought I was already enough of a scumbag, but I never imagined this guy would come up with something as high-level as cold-shoulder punishment... Kōichi, you're the real sadist..."
Aqua looked at the chaotic scene and scooted away in disgust.
"Hey, you two, knock it off already! Everyone else in the guild is staring this way! Luna-san has already started writing a No Perverts Allowed sign!"
Kōichi calmly withdrew his staff and swept his gaze across the room.
Two to one. The match was decided.
The atmosphere in the guild hall sank into an eerie silence because of Kōichi's victory, a victory declaration so extreme it was practically psychological pollution.
Luna-san had already silently hung up the Closed for Today sign and started wondering whether she ought to call Axel's guards to deal with this gathering of perverts.
Kōichi looked down at the 6.3 million Eris on the table, enough for an ordinary person to struggle for ten years to earn. The golden glow reflected off a face practically stamped with plan successful.
His fingers had already brushed the thick stack of ten-thousand-Eris notes, the winner's five million share.
But when the corner of his eye swept across the people beside him, Kazuma with his bruised face and dead-eyed stare, Aqua gazing longingly with drool practically dripping, Darkness sprawled on the floor flushed red all over, and Megumin, who had just been woken up and was clutching her staff in utter confusion, Kōichi suddenly realized something.
If he really took the lion's share now, this already shaky little party would probably fall apart tomorrow morning for the ridiculous reason of the captain being assassinated by his teammates over uneven loot distribution.
For the sake of long-term sustainable exploitation... no, for the sake of long-term team harmony, Kōichi took a deep breath and made a decision that went against his sadistic instincts.
"Ahem. Listen up, all of you." With a sharp sweep of his hand, Kōichi split the pile of coins and bills into five shares, the rustling clatter crisp and almost musical. "I may have won the captain's seat and the right to decide the distribution, but I'm not the kind of man who eats meat himself while leaving his brothers to live on the wind. We split the 6.3 million evenly between the five of us. 1.26 million Eris each. Anyone got a problem with that?"
The air froze again for three full seconds.
"O-One million two hundred sixty thousand?!" Kazuma jerked his head up, and the dead light in his eyes instantly reignited with the fire of life. His trembling hand reached toward his share of the money. "Kōichi... you bastard... I take back what I said before. You may be a pantyless psycho, but when it comes to splitting money, you're practically Axel's conscience! You're my big brother now!"
"Waaahhh! Kōichi! You really are a secret follower of the Axis Order, aren't you?! This generosity, this magnanimity! Only a god could have a heart this broad!" Aqua gave a shriek of joy and threw herself onto her share of the money like a starving tiger pouncing on prey. She was so excited she practically tried to rub herself against Kōichi. "It's decided! From now on, you're my High Priest! As long as you keep giving me money, I'll even agree to purify every toilet in the world!"
"E-Equal shares...?" Darkness staggered to her feet, a complicated look flashing through her eyes. "Even with absolute authority in your hands, you chose this level of mercy and equality... this feeling of being pitied by someone above me... ngh! Could this also be some advanced form of psychological domination? Kōichi, you truly are unfathomable..."
"I have no idea what just happened, but if there's money involved, I won't hold it against you for waking me up." Megumin calmly collected her share and slipped it into the inner pocket of her robe with practiced ease. "1.26 million... that's enough to buy a great many high-purity magic recovery potions and expensive dried specialties from the Crimson Demon Clan. Nicely done, Captain."
Watching how instantly this money bought everyone over, Kōichi felt deeply pleased with himself.
Using two million out of the original five million to buy the absolute loyalty of this group of top-tier fighters, though admittedly they were all problem children, plus secure the legitimate status of captain, was a deal that was outrageously profitable no matter how he looked at it.
"Alright, now that the loot's been split, get yourselves together!" Kōichi clapped his hands and put on the full authority of a captain. "Our top priority now is dealing with these damn rags that stink of crocodile breath and Holy Water! Kazuma, go buy two changes of clothes tomorrow morning, and make sure you get me the highest-quality silk underwear! Aqua, don't blow all your money in one night at the tavern! Darkness, go get your armor repaired. Next time we fight, I do not want to be distracted by worrying about your wardrobe malfunction!"
"Yes!! Captain!!"
Everyone answered in perfect unison, so loudly that Luna-san jumped and dropped the quill from her hand.
Late that night in Axel, a bizarre group known as the Kōichi Party officially began its era of rule, carrying heavy bounty money and each nursing their own private schemes.