—...What's the matter? You sound like you're in pain… Would you like me to fetch you some water?
—W-Water… D– Don't touch me! Keep your hands off me!
Not a particularly restful sleep, I take it?
—You… Where are you hiding?! Why did you disappear?! You were always around before!
—U-U–
—Show yourself! Show yourself immediately! Where are you?! Show yourself!
And if I did,
what would you do, then?
Kill me?
You thirst for blood,
to instill fear,
to live.
In the face of your desire,
others' lives are meaningless.
That's the kind of man you are.
Or…
do you intend to pretend
that you never did anything of the sort?
—Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! I couldn't help it! I wanted to live! I didn't want to die!
Yes, yes indeed.
That's the kind of man you are.
You'll kill for your own sake.
Hehe…
You'll kill a child's mother and father
as he stands there watching.
—They… They tried to kill me first! All of them… the entire village!
—Calm yourself… Who are you speaking to? Please, get a hold of yourself!
—Silence! Stop talking! Keep… Keep your hands off me! I'll… I'll kill you too! I'm a beast… who will kill anyone!
—Calm down… It's all right… Everything's all right. It's all right.
—I– I'm a… I'm a beast… Beasts kill… and so I kill… Hah… hah… hahh… aaaah…
—Breathe slower… I will not harm you, and you will not harm me. It's all right. Put your arms around me. See for yourself that I am not afraid of you.
—Hahh… haah… nnh… nnnh…
This is brilliant.
What are you clinging onto this woman for?
Is that the only way you can maintain your grip on yourself?
It would be so, so much easier
if you simply accepted the fact that you're a beast.
You've always,
always been one,
haven't you?
Can a beast
cultivate love like a human?
Weep in sorrow like a human?
No, they cannot. It's utterly ridiculous.
—Sh-Shut up… Shut up, shut up!
—It's all right… I'm right here. I'm right here…
—Can I… Can I… trust you?
—Of course.
This little façade will be over soon enough.
It will end… at that woman's hands.
Because that's
what she's here for.
To crush your soul into tiny pieces.
…..
We met three years ago.
I thought for sure I would get burnt
sitting beneath the hellishly pounding sun on that sweltering summer day.
It's only ever on days such as those that we end up having lunch outside.
Not just out of the house–literally outside.
The heat was searing.
I could hear the cry of seagulls from the restaurant's terrace.
I remember that day clear as crystal.
—Ah, yes, I have to say, the food here is spectacular. And I love that they give you so much meat. Though I thought my gut'd explode the first time I saw it, hahaha! Wouldn't you say so?
—I-Indeed… Yes, it is.
—By the look on your face, I'd say you're already feeling it? You're not going to make it in this line of work without a big ol' stomach, son.
—Heh… hahaha.
—I'm a huge fan of this country's food. One taste and you never forget it. I'd like to bring the entire cuisine back with me if I could.
—That is the first time we've seen you in how long ,and you're talking about food? The first thing you asked when you arrived was, "Is the restaurant by the seaside still open?" for goodness' sake. Is your heart made of stone?
—W hat, would you prefer we discuss the mundane? Why don't we talk about market developments and our spices inventory?
—That's not what I meant!
—...Mmm…
It's hot.
My parents' relationship is on thin ice, but the air feels like it's on fire. It's much too hot.
My dad loves this seaside restaurant. It actually specializes in fish, but he always asks for meat.
Though "always" isn't very often. He's out of the country most of the time, so we rarely eat together as a family.
For that reason, I can usually put up with a little heat for a family gathering…
Today, however, is awkward.
—Go on, son, dig in! You can't find food this good back home!
—A-As you say…
Every course, the table is lined with meat, meat, meat.
Even I'm starting to feel heavy in the gut. At this rate, I might turn into meat myself.
Hmm. What kind of meat would I turn into, though? I guess beef, maybe, if the meal keeps on like this.
—Just how much food are you planning to order? I can't believe you. Why did I ever marry you?
—Come now. We're out as a family. You could stand to be a little more pleasant!
—And who do you think is making me unpleasant?!
—N-Now, now, now, now.
—Now, now, now, now!
From time to time, our eyes meet. But every time they do, we both avert our gaze. This goes on throughout the meal.
My father invited him to lunch. Dad introduced him as his right-hand, so I assume he's also a trader.
His eyes are somewhat narrow, his posture perfectly upright. He looks very no-nonsense and not especially affable…
Frankly, he kind of scares me.
—H-Hey, Dad? Are we going anywhere after lunch? I figured, since we're all together, maybe we could take a walk or visit someplace out of town…
—Mm? Ah, yes, hmm. Actually, I've got a letter to write after this. A letter to one of the bigwigs back home. So I'm planning to head straight back to the trading post.
—Oh, okay…
—Can't say I'm especially surprised…
—What do you want me to do? If I could get an audience with him in person, maybe this wouldn't be necessary, but that's not possible. So I have no choice but to write a long, long letter. Oh yes, Pauline. If you're going on a walk, bring him along. I'm sure he's tired of putting up with me day in and day out.
—Wha–
—Oh, no, I'm…
—Hold on, now! Could you please leave Pauline out of this?! She has things she needs to do too!
—What's the big deal? You want to know about an area, ask someone who lives there. That's the best way to learn. Besides, you'll stick out like a sore thumb wandering around on your own, son.
—But… I couldn't…
—Um, I…
—You don't mind, do you, Pauline?
—Uh… not at all…
—God, you are the most inconsiderate man!
Mon says, then leans in and whispers to me,
—Listen to me. Do not let your guard down around a foreign man.
My father is, as a matter of fact, a foreigner.
And the man he brought to lunch is from the same country.
…..
—Um… This is park.
—Indeed it is… It is a park.
My assignment to show this man around town is, to be honest, going quite horribly.
"This is a park." No. Just… no.
Couldn't you come up with anything better, Pauline?!
But I don't know anything about the history of this park.
In fact, I don't know much of anything about this town's history.
I just sort of… walk around every day, not really paying it much mind. Wouldn't someone more knowledgeable make a better guide?
I can't do it! Don't ask this of me!
Also, he…
He doesn't talk very much, and he's got this perpetually stern look on his face. He really does scare me.
Don't worry, Mom. Your daughter won't mistakenly fall for a foreigner.
At any rate. Regardless of how I feel, I am still technically his guide.
I've got to try a little harder.
Though I know it won't be easy…
—And then, uh, there's a fountain!
—...There is, indeed… a fountain.
"There's a fountain." Again, no. Seriously, Pauline? He has eyes!
—Urgh… umm… uh… I'm sorry… I'm not much of a guide… Maybe my dad could show you around instead…
—N-No, don't worry about it. I think you're doing just fine. In fact… I'm sorry you got roped into this. I doubt you much enjoy having to walk around town beside, um, someone like me.
—What? No, that's not it at all…
—Oh, is that so…? I'm glad to hear it. Here's an idea: rather than guide me, how about this? Why don't you show me what you usually do, the places you normally go?
—Do you really want to see that?
—I'd prefer to see the town through the eyes of a resident. To see it for what it is, instead of what makes good sightseeing.
—A-All right then, um… I often get ham sandwiches from the shops near here. Having lunch on the wall by the fountain is the most wonderful thing. Look over there. See the butcher shop? And the baker next to it? I buy bread from the bakery, bring it to the butcher, get a few slices of ham, and put it on the bread. It's absolutely to die for.
—Haha… but you just had a huge lunch.
—I-I'm not getting one right now! Also, please don't think I'm as carnivorous as my dad.
—Sorry, sorry, I didn't mean to imply any such thing.
—Jeez…
Wait. Hold on. Did he just… smile? He did. It was a small one, but he did.
He can actually smile. Being human, that should be obvious, but it's kind of strange seeing him do it.
Maybe… just maybe we'll be able to get along, even just a little bit?
—Um… do you mind if I ask you a question?
—Sure, go right ahead.
—Could you tell me about your home country? I've asked Dad, but he won't tell me very much.
—Ah…
—C'mon, how about it? I'm really curious.
—He… probably doesn't know very much himself.
—What? About his own homeland?
—Some don't…
—...? What do you–
—How about that fountain? I'd like to get a closer look at it. At the spot you like to sit.
—O-Okay…
"What was that just now? Did he dodge my question? Is there something there he doesn't want to get into…?"
—From this angle, it looks like the fountain's sitting atop the ocean.
—Ah, yeah, it does… It does. If you want, we can go to the beach. It's a straight walk from here.
—No, I like this view. The sea's a pretty color here. You can clearly see the white of the fountain upon it.
—The sea's a different color than the fountain?
—It is. In fact, the sea is often changing colors itself, but out on the water, it can be easy to overlook. It can be the color of emerald, or deep blue like sapphire, or almost black, like obsidian. The sea has a face, and with it, many expressions.
—Huh… I'd like to see that. Maybe I'll ask Dad and get him to take me out on his ship.
—You have quite the adventurous spirit. Not many women say they want to ride a ship.
—You think? I want to go everywhere I haven't been before. I want to see for myself that the world extends beyond this town.
—Ahh… That's a fine ambition. Hopefully, the time will come when anyone can have access to a ship with relative ease.
He… actually smiles quite a bit, I guess.
And we seem to be talking pretty comfortably too. He's a lot more friendly than he looks…
He appears almost noble, the way he looks out at the sea, his gaze steadfast and unwavering.
Oh dear, that was close. He almost deceived me.
He's a foreign man, and I'm simply his guide. You mustn't think you've grown close to him just because you were able to hold a brief conversation.
—By the way…
—Hmm? Pardon me. Yes?
—That outfit you're wearing…
—What, this? Oh yes, it's absolutely splendid! Hehe. My dad brought it back for me. It's of a peculiar design, with unusual accessories! The moment I saw it, I said "oh my!" "Oh my," I said! It's so pretty, I want to show it off to everyone!
—I… I see.
—Oh, it's just so magnificent. He actually had a decent eye for clothing. I guess he has more in that head of his than meat.
—Actually… um…
—Hmm?
—I… brought back that outfit.
—Huh?
—When… When I heard I was going to meet my boss's daughter… I thought it would be best if I brought some kind of gift. So I had a tailor imitate the style of my homeland. I'm… delighted it's to your liking.
—Wh– Wh– Wha– H-Hold on a second!
—Yes?
—So you're saying these clothes I'm fawning over… were given to me by you… and you had them made for me?
—Indeed.
—And completely oblivious, here I am wearing them now…
—More precisely, you've been wearing them since lunch.
—Wh-Wh-Why didn't you say something before?! Th-This is humiliating! I want to bury my head in the sand!
—B-But I thought you liked them?
—I-I do. I do indeed, but–!
—Having never met you, I wasn't sure what colors you liked, but… I'm, uh… I was relieved to see you wearing them. They look nice on you.
He says with a smile.
He always standing up perfectly straight, always looking stern and no-nonsense–and he kind of scares me.
But he's a gentleman.
—I– I'm going to go change!
—Wha?!
—I'm going to go change! I'll be back in five seconds, so just wait there!
—Ah… Five seconds is infeasible…
Oh god, help me, Mom.
I really, really need your help.
Because my heart just skipped a beat.
For a foreign man.